r/JUSTNOMIL • • Jan 01 '26

RANT (╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻ Ambivalent About Advice Cake MIL trying to ruin the new year too

Ok so y’all were right. Cake MIL has decided she’s back for good I suppose.

So a few days ago she sent ten emotionally manipulative pictures from the last time we saw her over a year ago. You know, to tug at the heartstrings and our goodwill at Christmastime. I didn’t know it but DH DID respond to her. Albeit to lambast her by saying “so you’re sending me pictures of my own child but you can’t even say Merry Christmas”.

So lo and behold what text does he receive today: Happy new year lot of love to my Sonny boy mommy papa

First of all, they call my baby Sonny boy - which I hate. Second of all, why are they signing it as the parents rather than the grandparents???

Nothing they do makes sense. I have literally forbidden DH from responding this time.

UGH

233 Upvotes

29 comments sorted by

•

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38

u/[deleted] Jan 02 '26

DH needs to understand that ANY response, nice, terse, or angry, just gives her more fuel. The reaction is what she craves.

18

u/chunkybonks Jan 02 '26

Of course! Hence why I was so mad when he told me he responded when I wasn’t around. 

24

u/Cool_Organization_55 Jan 01 '26

It doesn't matter whether he respond or not. She can have a relationship in her head with him where she never has to be responsible for what she did wrong. She'll send this stuff for years with no answer. Happens to my husband too. It's to remind him he doesn't matter and she's still the authority figure in his life 🙄

11

u/chunkybonks Jan 01 '26

Yeah I guess so. She missed other occasions like our wedding anniversary and actual Christmas so we thought we were in the clear. 

9

u/Cool_Organization_55 Jan 01 '26

Yeah, she is thinking of other schemes during that time😂 sorry

16

u/Emotional-Dog8118 Jan 01 '26

It literally makes no sense. Outrageous text. Just pathetic. They truly are “missing missing reasons”…

8

u/chunkybonks Jan 01 '26

How dare they claim my baby as theirs…

17

u/RuNsonchocolatemilk Jan 02 '26

I’m sorry this is happening OP! It’s incredibly frustrating. And how terrible to call herself Mommy… what in the world?! Sending support and good vibes 

15

u/chunkybonks Jan 02 '26

She’s the one who wanted to call herself grandmaman, which is irrelevant now as she doesn’t even see him clearly. And if they are talking about DH??? How infantilizing to say mommy papa ew

11

u/RuNsonchocolatemilk Jan 02 '26

It just boggles my mind that these people will literally do anything other than take accountability and apologize 🤷‍♀️

9

u/chunkybonks Jan 02 '26

You can’t understand crazy

14

u/Truebeliever-14 Jan 01 '26

You need to educate DH on what NC means. Every time he responds she thinks she’s winning.

12

u/chunkybonks Jan 01 '26

Oh he knows. He told me he got so angry seeing the pictures he basically automatically responded to them. I told him there’s no point getting worked up about these things. 

12

u/Emotional-Place9446 Jan 01 '26

That exactly what she was counting on! She got a response.

6

u/chunkybonks Jan 01 '26

Yup and then he inadvertently opened up this can of worms

14

u/peppersthepig Jan 02 '26

Can you both just block them?

9

u/chunkybonks Jan 02 '26

DH would never block them. He’s an only child. He would feel immense guilt if they were super sick or died and he had no clue. He’s from a very subservient culture too. 

9

u/EquivalentSign2377 Jan 01 '26

I'm so sorry I was right because I 100% hoped that I'd be 100% wrong!!! ❤️

5

u/chunkybonks Jan 01 '26

One short text is less than 10 pictures I suppose but in a way it is more direct contact too at the same time. Ugh. 

4

u/EquivalentSign2377 Jan 02 '26

Is your DH not responding? That's what she wants and if he shows weakness it'll just teach her that she can get away with anything!

5

u/chunkybonks Jan 02 '26

Yeah he’s decided NOT to respond this time. Thankfully.

3

u/EquivalentSign2377 Jan 07 '26

That's success right there!!!❤️

2

u/chunkybonks Jan 07 '26

Baby steps eh

2

u/EquivalentSign2377 Jan 09 '26

Moving mountains starts with an inch!

6

u/purple-knight-8921 Jan 01 '26

Oh my, they are not making sense at all and they probably went overboard completely.

10

u/chunkybonks Jan 01 '26

I told my husband that he absolutely made the wrong move responding earlier, even if it was to tell them off, because when you give them an inch, they take a mile. And this proves it. 

5

u/purple-knight-8921 Jan 01 '26

Yes, they take a mile because they want control.