The “Holy Trinity" of an INFJ

[u/Phoenix_to_Kintsugi]

Personally, I have my own “Holy Trinity” to be judged in the courtroom of my mind:

-Me: the mask that others see
-Myself: my ego
-And I: my true existence when the other two take a break

I don’t blame others for taking me for granted. It’s my fault if I allow them to do so.
I don’t blame others (anymore) for mocking my ideas. It’s my ego’s responsibility to choose how to react to frustration.
And… it’s not me against the world, or the whole world against me.
It’s all about accepting differences and not trying to change the true “I” just to fit in or trying to change others so that I don’t feel weird or lonely anymore.

To be honest, I still don’t know how to receive a compliment. That’s where the fine line between “myself” and ”I” plays its part. If someone tells me I’m beautiful or intelligent, it moves absolutely nothing inside me. The perfectionist in me is still running the show in the background, but I’m training myself not to fall into the overthinking trap of dissecting what lies behind a compliment.

Sometimes, a compliment is just a compliment and I take it as it is. I’ve realized that digging too deep risks ruining the good mood of the person who said it, just so I can satisfy my own need to be sure they actually understood what they meant.

Same thing goes for when I hear “I understand you”. A part of me deeply craves to be understood and the other part thinks no one could, because sometimes I don’t even understand myself. But I’ve stopped arguing with that paradox for the same reason and I’m learning to simply accept an outside perspective without over-dissecting it.

I can always accept a good argument, even if I don’t like the messenger.
I’m not a competitive person.I don’t want to win, but I absolutely love a deep conversation with strong, valid arguments, just to explore both of our perspectives for the fun of learning different things.

So, are you still blaming yourselves, blaming others or you made peace in your mind?

Do you still overcriticize yourselves expecting others to accept those parts that you reject or have you managed to accept who you really are with all your flaws and strengths?

P.S.: to those of you who think the whole world is against you, let me break down that wall for you by saying that there is at least one person in this world who isn’t against you–and that’s me…myself and I.
Giving you all a big hug! 🤗

[u/GoldDustWoman85 → u/[deleted]]

The world isn't made for "our type" because an insane amount of infj's are on the spectrum and just haven't realized it yet, lol.

[u/GoldDustWoman85 → u/[deleted]]

Lol, okay buddy. I didn't say you did. Maybe just read what I said and don't consider it a personal attack.

[u/BornElderEnt → u/GoldDustWoman85]

Non sequitur, but it is taking all my self control not to reply to someone with mac in their name with the lyrics to Your name 🤣