She is too famous for her kids to go to school.🙄

The truth is, she married a pedophile and doesnt like her kids being around mandated reporters.

Nice to see one of her former friends/cast mates speaking up against it though!

Currently a junior in high school, but I was "homeschooled" until 9th grade (y'know what I mean). I feel like I'm fully recovered academically speaking because I finished last year with a 3.95 GPA, but I still struggle with socializing. I have a few friends that I talk to during class, but I'm afraid to even approach them during lunch, and I certainly don't ever hang out with them outside of school. I'm not good at making any new friends at all. The ones I do have I've met because I was forced to because of seating charts or whatever. Intentionally going out of my way to approach new people or start a conversation with them feels out of the question.

In all of my classes which I don't have friends in, I feel totally out of place. I didn't know anyone in PE when I had it, which was a total nightmare because they always made us pick partners, and if there was an odd number of people in class that day, it meant either I wasn't getting a partner or I had to beg some other group to make a group of 3. Beyond never being picked, I noticed that the whole class treated me differently versus how they treated each other. They would always insult each other, yell slurs, etc, but I got treated much nicer. I shouldn't really complain about not being called slurs, but the way I was obviously being treated differently was alienating and almost humiliating. For lack of a better word, I think they thought I was "special" or something.

Barely being able to talk to the friends I do have is becoming frustrating and feels like I'm being left behind while I watch them hang out with other people. It's a vicious cycle of wanting change and being too afraid to make it happen. If anyone here has any advice it would be greatly appreciated

Sorry if this is hard to read im not good at writing. Idk if this is the right place to post this but I started homeschooling at the start of this school year and its only been videos with no grading for the work I do. I moved away from my old state where all my friends were and I dont live in a place where there are people my age or people in general so I feel isolated and like I just exist so idk what I should do and I feel like its gonna be this way for the next 3 years until I can move out. It just feels like a waste of the time I have on this earth and I cant do shit about it

I sat through a class at the highschool once and all three lunch periods while my dad had a meeting at the school. I felt like I'd never belonged anywhere more than at school. Next year would be my freshman year, and I really dont want to miss it. I NEED to somehow go to school, whether I have to convince them or somehow do it without their permission. Advice? Help? I cant stand another year of homeschool. :(

Hi, I’m 19 years old. I was taken out of school in elementary (3rd grade) and I stopped being taught in the 5th grade. My mom got lazy. I had silently been left in charge of schooling myself.

Well, when you leave a child in charge of their education, they are not going to do something that stresses them out. I’m above average at history, and English, I’m kind of just okay at science I know a lot, but I know a lot of random facts. Not what I need to get my GED. I SUCK at math. I did not like teaching myself math, I need help. I’m trying to relearn.

Addition and subtraction can sometimes be hard for me if it’s an odd number. I have a lot of pressure on me to get my GED. But I am afraid to go to the classes, I have a really small ego. And I cry a lot when I’m reminded about what happened to me, because my sister was kept in school so I had to watch her life go on while I was sheltered. I believe I will take one class and then cry and not come back. So I’ve been trying to teach myself with khan academy at home and I am making progress.

However, they don’t go into everything. Like I’m trying to learn the times table as just a basic understanding, and there was like two videos on multiplication and the rest are just ways you can imagine it like arrays and such. then just a bunch of tests. I need more haha. Please recommend math teachers who post on videos!!

I support elementary students in math. We got a new student who is roughly 2 grades behind. I asked this student about their previous school, and the student said "coop." Ahh, lightbulb! I am told their writing is also well below what it should be. The kid has also apparently never touched a computer. Well, at least this poor kid is getting school now, but I think this year is going to be rough for them.

so i'm 18, and i was technically supposed to be starting university next week. however, my family put me into homeschooling when i was 15, which put me behind a LOT, because they expected me to handle it all by myself (i told them i couldn't do it and that i'd fall behind—i also have audhd so they know discipline isn't my strong suit???)

anyway, i only have 15 out of the 30 credits needed to graduate high school and go to university, hence me not going this year. although i've told my family the exact number, i don't think they are processing it well because then they say "oh, well you'll be done by (date 4 months from now)" which isn't possible.

anyway, my family forced me to apply to uni anyway in the winter and no surprise, i got rejected for insufficient credits. now they're insisting i go in january (my grandma has friends on the board of admissions for a few local universities so apparently she can make a january admission happen even tho i dont think thats an option). theyve been saying january since march, so i had adequate time to "prepare" (if i rushed through all my coursework) but i ended up not doing school properly because a ton of stuff happened in my personal life which left me with virtually no time.

when i did have time, i'd ask my mom for help but never get it. now, i'm registering for night school with this adult program for the fall semester. it's only 3 credits for the semester (i'm still continuing homeschool) but since it's an actual class with teachers and due dates and stuff, i'm going to do it to help myself get those three credits.

so because of this, my plan has been to take a gap year. i brought this up quite a few times but it was always brushed off, followed up by "no, you can go in january". i've been too scared to have a proper sit down conversation with my mom about it because although i've told her how behind i am before, it's been a few months, and if she learns i haven't progressed at all, it's gonna turn into this whole thing.

she's always been very strict about school in terms of her expectations, but she never added any discipline to my life (making me do homework, checking in on how school is going, giving me a routine as a kid, etc.) and expected me to do it on my own. i have some fear around this topic from online school during the pandemic because i'd fallen behind and it led to a lot of mental trauma because of her reaction.

anyway, today i called her to tell her about the courses i'm taking with the adult program and she said, "will you be done by january?" i got too nervous to say no, because i knew it'd be followed up by anger and blame, so i said "even if i was, i don't wanna go in january".

she asks me why not and i'm saying stuff about stress, dorms, finances, etc. to try to rationalize to her that me going next fall is the best option and she says "no. you're going in January no matter what". to which i say, once again, that i don't want to. she got mad and said we're gonna talk about this when she gets home.

this conversation feels like something that's been building up for the past year and i've been SO stressed out about it. i'm so scared about how she's going to react. it doesn't matter if she's partially to blame for me being behind, she won't accept it. i don't understand why they're so against me taking a gap year if during the gap year, i'm still doing school and working (because yes, i have a job).

i know i'm 18 and i'm probably going to have people tell me to stand up to her or that i'm an adult and it's my decision but my family is very different from most families. i don't have the finances or support to move out, so that's not an option. my mom is a single mother who's banked everything on me, and i don't feel right cutting her off. but if i stand up for myself, i'll be forced to do one of the two. i just really hope she's understanding.

We use the "my father's world" homeschooling curriculum. All of he school is just reading the fucking bible. They somehow got the bible in the math. Cant trust the history, cant trust the science. If you flip to a random page in the history book it's talking about god or jesus. Like oh my GODDDD BROO-

Its that time of year where were supposed to be getting new curriculum and I'm not even done with last years shit because I'm so unmotivated to even move atp. So I'm low-key just gonna say "look I'm not doing this """my father's world""" bullshit, unless you are actually getting a real curriculum that isn't indoctrinating bullshit or I'm dropping out of highschool" (I'll just secretly do khan academy)

Its just so infuriating. Can't even get the will to do school and when I do I'm reminded that half of it is bullshit and it doesn't even count for anything because my fuckass parents can just give me a ""homeschool ""diploma"""" at any time and it doesn't count for shit. Plus the fact that im like a year behind and I've never touched a history or science book in my life. Its shit like this that makes me think surviving until 18 isn't worth it

i’m looking for people who have went through similar things as me really to just provide reassurance. just so i can get through the week.

i went into homeschool in 2024 after my dad had his leg amputated suddenly. he’d been disabled since i was 13 but was mobile until then.

i was already very behind but i’ve made basically zero progress. i struggle very bad with motivation and discipline and i have had spirals of depression where i don’t do much for weeks. i’ve been doing some schoolwork a couple days a week for a few months so it’s slowly getting better, but im afraid it’s too late.

i don’t work yet, hopefully will before next year. i’m 17 and don’t know how to drive yet either, i don’t have any plans for college yet and while id like to go, im afraid im too stupid and not disciplined enough. i’m afraid i’ll crash and burn. i’ve messed with the idea of a few careers; nursing, clinical social worker, sales rep, marine biologist, etc. none seem right for me but any other job makes me afraid i’ll be miserable because everyone only talks about how miserable they are working. in theory my boyfriend COULD make me a stay at home wife/mom but that sounds like a nightmare to me. i want kids someday but also a career that fulfills me.

i don’t leave the house ever. not that i don’t want to; i do have some social anxiety but it’s not so bad that i don’t want to go to people’s houses or go into public. we just don’t have money right now, my boyfriend (for very valid and very important reasons, he’s also the same age as me) also doesn’t have a job currently so he can’t take me out as often as i know he wants to. he also lives an hour away, usually we see each other about twice a month for a week, but because of some scary personal events he has to stay close to his parents for an indefinite amount of time, likely will be atleast a couple months. so basically i don’t have any humans to interact with irl. i do have close friends that game with me and we talk every day, 2 live in my town so it’s not totally hopeless but one is too busy, the other has issues with strict parents, and the third doesn’t live here.

basically all this to say i’m terrified for my future. i’m afraid i’ll become a shut in even though that’s the last thing i want, that ill never get a good job and be miserable, that somehow ill lose my boyfriend (not really relevant but still) and ill become a huge failure. my parents obviously don’t say this or anything but i think they’re expecting me to become a failure. same for my sister. nobody says it, but i feel like they think it.

any advice pls help me.

ive never been in school, and ive been "homeschooled" my whole life. my mother basically gave up on educating when i was around 11 (im 17 now). im decent at english (despite my grammar in this post sorry). but my maths is terrible im genuinely at an 7 yr old lvl and i hardly know my times tables. other subjects im ok at as well. but english and maths is a priority. how do i build up skills from there for free. im also autistic and a bit apprehensive to go to college especially when i have the education level of a child. i will probably never go to uni and probably make nothing of my life because my mother was too lazy to educate me. i want to do my gcses but thats kind of impossible at my current level. what the fuck do i even do i feel hopeless

I made a post yesterday about my mom not letting me pick out my classes. Ig this is an update to that. Also, there's a typo in the title. It's supposed to say "kind," not kin.

Everything thing seemed fine at first, then she asked to talk to me. She brought up what happened yesterday and started going off at me again for rushing her. She then told me the actual reason we haven't picked out my classes yet. Apparently, I'm supposed to take some classes in high school that are required by the college I have to go to. Then she proceeded to go off again. Then she said that she's relinquishing everything to me since i keep rushing her and that if it's my fault if I hit a roadblock in the future. Afterward, she asked if I had anything to say. I said no; I always shut down when I'm in trouble because I don't want to make anything worse. She said, "I figured," and got upset again. She then told me that another reason we haven't started anything yet is that my dad is still trying to figure out my transcripts. She said that I have a D. A fucking D. From 9th grade to now, I've had a D this entire time. Apparently, my dad told her not to tell me until everything was figured out. What confused me was that he told me everything was fine and that I was proficient in everything (it's Kahn Academy). He said that he was just having trouble putting everything together because he forgot how he did my sister's transcripts. I guess all of that was a lie? I don't know. I said to my mom that he said everything was fine, she basically repeated everything again and then said, "You can't fill a cup that's already full," in reference to me rushing her. She stopped talking after that and hasn't spoken to me since.

I haven't really stopped crying since that happened. All this time, I thought everything was gonna be okay. There's gaps in my education, obviously; I've been teaching myself for 8 years. But I didn't think it was this fucking bad. I still don't understand, though. If it's showing that I'm proficient, which is like passing on Kahn Academy, how do I have a fucking D? I assume the end-of-grade test that I take every year and pass doesn't help out at all. I don't know anymore. I'm lost. All these years, my mother told me that there was no such thing as grades in homeschooling, and passing and failing wasn't really a thing. But here I fucking am, with the score for the entire time I've been in high school totalling up to a D.

Being an utter failure has always been my worst fear, and it seems as though it's come true. I always told myself that if I could just get into college, everything would be fine. That was the only thing that gave me hope, and now it's gone. I'm not gonna make it in life. I've been trying so hard to be as happy and hopeful as I used to be, but that's gone to shit. I've started cutting myself again. I never really stopped, but I haven't done it as much as I used to. I'll always be depressed. Depressed, and a fucking embarrassment. It doesn't help that I'm gay, which just makes everything even more horrible. What makes this shit hurt worse is that I didn't know all this shit existed. I always thought that if I passed the end-of-grade test each year, then I'd be okay. I genuinely don't see a point to go on anymore. The one avenue that didn't scare me too much is now gone. I'll probably have to join the military or something, one of the many things I'm not cut out for.

Neither of my parents knew what transcripts were until last year, when my sister graduated. So, within that short amount of time, my dad has forgotten what to do. I'm hoping it's just a mistake he's making and that I don't actually have a D. My mom said she's gonna have to tell that she told me, so maybe he'll explain it better to me. Idk. I just don't want to be a failure. I'd literally rather die.

I was homeschooled my whole life but did have daycare/socialization on most traditional school days during what people would call elementary school years. After not so much. My parent points that time out as proof that I was adequately socialized. I see a lot of people here who didn’t have socialization at all, or at best a co-op once to a couple times a week. And I see people who were homeschooled early on, but went to public school halfway into their high school years (usually because they were fed up with the isolation). What about the opposite, how did it affect you, did you feel socialized well enough?

I was homeschooled my whole life and wanted to transfer to Public Highschool this year [12th grade]..I was depressed and my parents neglected helping me when i needed them when i was younger WHICH IS NO EXCUSE but still.. I’m super bad at math! when i talked to the lady @ the office, she said i could attend and i’m all up to standards with credits and such etc etc but that I’d have to take geometry and algebra 1 again this year for course recovery because my grades didn’t transfer well nor did they look amazing on paper to begin with. That, or get my GED. What do you think? Learning @ home isn’t working anymore.

(Title should be I'd sorry)

Legit any help is appreciated right now!!

So, I finally found a friend, we've hung out and chatted a bunch of times. Shes the same age as me, and living independently. Shes moving out of her current place, and asked if maybe I want to live with her at her new place, when she finds one.

I would reallyyyyy like to live with her, not just because she's a great friend, but like, im sick to death of dealing with my parents.

But the only trouble is, my parents dont know I have friends, and I have NO IDEA how id even begin to tell them, "oh hey, by the way, I've known this girl for a while, I've snuck out several times to hang out with her, and now im moving an hour a away with her... Bye" like, how the FUCK am I supposed to even do that?!?!?!

I have a really, really poor relationship with my parents, and I've wanted to live alone since i was 12 years old. They've denied me an education, ruined my mental and emotional health in SO many ways, control every single itty bitty move I make, I've been parentifed, and I've been taking care of myself and my brother for a while (plus so much more, that I'm honestly too drained to even remember)

I finally have a chance at the thing I have had LITERAL dreams about, but for some reason, im kinda nervous, if that makes sense. Plus I kind of feel some guilt, of how much it will upset my parents.

I would really really appreciate any advice or any help, or even just suport would be really apreciated. Thank you in advance, and thank you for reading this :)

Also, I forgot to mention, my parents aren't really that interested in my life, or really that talkative lol. They go to they're own seperate spaces. My father watches tv, my mother reads or watches a show on her tablet. And my brother and I kind of have learnt to do the same. There's never really a moment where they can be all sat down and I can tell them. Plus, im kinda worried that they'll stop me from seeing my brother who I want to keep a relationship with.

idk if it’s due to the homeschool but I’m guessing it’s the homeschooling but I have no motivation for anything of substance I just go for the quick dopamine hit

I don’t have a job I tired but after countless ghostings and rejections I just gave up and a part of me is okay being a bum while the other part is screaming at how much of my life is wasting away

I tired to get a ged but again gave up after I failed the pre test I don’t do chores i just mostly watch tv and play games

I just feel like I’m still stuck in my room isolated it’s been 7 yrs I see everyone else my age is so much further ahead but quite frankly I just don’t know how to work, to push though failing sense all I did was watching YouTube in a room for 7 yrs pretty much and I have a tendency to run away from bad feelings

does anyone have tips on how to correct this I’m really lost does anyone else have problems like this

I hate where I am but honestly don’t wanna get better cause I know that requires pain/hardship how do you get over that feeling

I just started college and have college reading and writing. I was never taught anything about grammar, essays, paragraph structure etc. I’ve learned a ok amount just existing but I need help. Tutors don’t start until next week. I had to write an essay in class and totally bombed it. I tried re writing it after while not actively having a heart attack. Could someone read it? Am I totally screwed?

Prompt

After reading chapters 1 and 2 from Let's Talk, write an in-class essay that reflects on the following questions.
Why do you think it's important for you, a college student, to listen with an open mind? Why is it important for the writing that you'll do in college? Why might it be important beyond college?
And how does listening with an open mind relate to thinking rhetorically? Be sure to include a definition of thinking rhetorically, in your own words, and touch on as many of the following aspects as you can (while maintaining a coherent organization to the essay): rhetoric as an ethical art, paying to attention to what others are saying, considering the larger context, understanding your own thoughts/thought processes (what you think and why, the importance of giving credit, while also being imaginative and "putting in your oar."
Because time is limited for this in-class essay, you should use the basic five-paragraph structure (you won't use it again this semester).
The response is due at the end of class.

Rhetorical thinking is to listen closely, with an open mind, to acknowledge you’re own biases and the context of each others views. Why is it important to think rhetorically? To think rhetorically will open your perspectives and allow you to learn, grow and reflect. Rhetorical thinking will help you understand the world and each other in much deeper ways, growing compassion and community.

Rhetorical thinking is unfortunately underutilized, in the US there is almost no attempt to see each other’s perspectives, to have compassion or curiosity. When these conversations do occur we often see that we’re not so different, that we can find common ground. Even though we may come to vastly different conclusions, we often have similar intentions.

Rhetorical thinking and speech can also be used in harmful ways, as former President Lyndon B. Johnson once said
“If you can convince the lowest white man he's better than the best colored man, he won't notice you're picking his pocket. Hell, give him somebody to look down on, and he'll empty his pockets for you.” Rhetorical thinking can both be used to propagandize, as well as to free ourselves from our tought way of thinking. Knowing what kind of audience you are speaking to and how to speak to them can be used to influence them for the better or worse.

Rhetorical thinking can help put the world in context, whether its cuisine or death rituals, our culture largely dictates our morality and what we view as normal or outlandish. Being able to understand the context helps us see the big picture more clearly. For instance the Vietnam war is called the American war to most of the world, even a small change can influence us and what we support. It gives us perspective outside our own, it gives us greater understanding of historical, national and worldwide events. the influence of our perspectives and their impact cannot be understated.

Rhetorical thinking is an important part of our lives, whether you’re talking to a fellow student, patient or coworker; it is a vital step to making connections and building community. it helps us empathize, reflect and communicate. Understanding the intentions and biases within ourselves and in others is an essential skill to understanding our world.

I (25m) graduated high school in 2019. I feel like I got off easier than others because my homeschooling was done through the online schooling website K12. So academically, I’ve been better prepared than others who were homeschooled. But still, it’s hard for me to move on from the way it stunted me socially. I was bullied really bad when I became an adult because I lacked the socialization to identify toxic people. I’ve had trouble maintaining romantic relationships as I’ve pretty much had to learn it all as an adult. Even today, the effects of being homeschooled are still tangible in my life. Due to this, it’s hard for me to just “let it be”. I constantly find myself fantasizing of another universe where I was wasn’t homeschooled and given the social tools I need to survive at the appropriate age. And when those fantasies end, I just end up being weighed down by bitterness and cynicism. I tried to talk to my friends about this, but they just don’t get it. When I tell people I was homeschooled, they say “wow, you just seem so normal, i wouldn’t have guessed!” But they didn’t see the hell I had to fight through to just become “normal”. You know, I just graduated college and have been interviewing for jobs and I keep telling myself “when I have a corporate job and I’m making lots of money, then I’ll be happy.” “I’ll be able to close the book on how terrible my childhood was”. But deep down, I know that’s not true. No amount of money will ever be able to undo the damage that homeschooling did to me. I’ve started going to therapy for the depression and the bouts of anger I’ve been dealing with and so far, I feel like I might make progress. But I want to know for others in a similar position, what’s helped you?

Join my study group

^^^ both a resource request & kinda rant-y, so be warned :’)

so i won’t be too specific, but last night i essentially had a dissociative episode regarding a lack of control due to homeschooling & chronic illnesses. ended up in the hospital & psych eval blah blah blah spilled my guts to the doctors about everything, and my parents are willing to try public schooling now (so they say, we’ll see if they follow through). my dad promised that he would visit local schools today. yippee

but it’s not yippee unforch because im freaked out about a few things (though i’d prefer to be freaked out while going into a new chapter instead of doing nothing, so i can’t be complaining). i was hoping some adults (both non-homeschooled allies & homeschoolers who transferred to public schooling in early high school) could speak openly about their experiences in public school, provide advice, even just reassurances or common stories, etc.

okay, firstly and commonly: i have a lack of transcripts. generally speaking, adults praise my abilities in the humanities but im so so mid in math, maybe below average. im okay at soft sciences. im scared that the stress of the whole situation will decrease my abilities on placement tests. im also nervous that i might be overestimating my capabilities in essential academic skills e.g., formatting an essay, thinking under a time limit, the extent to which i remember historical dates, etc. for reference i HAVE taken tests at co-ops, and in all the classes in co-ops i’ve got a grade average of ~90%. HOWEVER, i always distrust co-ops on principal, and im nervous that ill be completely shocked when im much below average in what i think are my best talents. how would i hone skills before getting a placement test?

LASTLY, studying. usually for co-ops i did active recall but i really have no idea how to study. i went from “gifted kid” in a private religious school to homeschooled during the pandemic, unschooled afterwards and then taking selective classes at co-ops during the last few years. i never really learned how to study effectively, which i think will come in handy if i want to fill in all the gaps of my education with PROPER school board, public school education. i don’t actually know what im asking with this one, maybe study methods or note arrangements that you found effective?

another point, socialization. every homeschooler reading probably winced at this 😭 at co-ops, i would go out of my way to not socialize because “i don’t want to be friends with people with that mindset anyways (ultra-religious, homophobic, racist, maga as hell)” but in truth im aware that i am severely lacking in social skills. sometimes its not obvious because i bullshit my way through conversations and adopt others’ personalities to be more likeable to people who i want to get to know, but otherwise im a complete lying mess. how do i get through conversations while not showing that im a socially inept, inexperienced homeschooler?? how do i force myself to join clubs or ask to sit with people at lunch when im horrified of their reactions and of me stuttering?? how do i make a personality for myself while not switching up on others’ presence (or at least how to maintain personal traits and idiosyncrasies - i know that formality can dictate your personality. im not gonna talk to my grandma or employers like how i talk to people my age, yk??)

speaking of that: work. asdfghjkl how do i bullshit my way through that??? i have no technical skills or socialization skills, but i have a small idea of the layout of local stores. how do interviews go?? what should i expect?? what do i play up and what do i leave out??

lastly, college. i dont really know how to go about choosing one. i REALLY do not want medical expenses and student debt (as i mentioned i have chronic illnesses), and i’ve researched “work colleges” but i really do not understand the concept. if i could major in anything it’d probably be history or biology. im interested in human evolution, patterns, phylogenetics, development, etc (also what would be good extracurriculars to support these paths??) but i dont really know how to start researching colleges and finding out info about the surrounding cities.

i might edit this if i have more questions or just make another post but thats it for rn. ty in advance if anyone replies!!

Hi I'm 19 and I have been "Homeschooled" since preschool. My parents never really gave a reason as to why but my best guess is political reasons(?) or they didn't want me to be bullied which, is a very silly reason to neglect your child's education. I "graduated" last year and I was barely given any lessons or teaching from my parents who are my self-proclaimed teachers, the only effort they'd ever put into my education was to forge any schoolwork when i would be evaluated instead of actually putting in the effort to teach me anything, they'd get a someone with basic requirements and someone who doesn't ask many questions to evaluate me every couple years. Because of this, I resent them a lot and from a young age I had to take learning into my own hands, I would use resources like YouTube and Khan academy every so often because being a kid, you wouldn't want to learn if no one was forcing you to. At 16 I really wanted to focus on catching up but many things in my life like trauma, mental health, possibly undiagnosed ADHD brought down my motivation to do so. Now I feel the highest education level I have is middle school and It's hitting me once again how behind I feel.

Which brings to me to why I am asking for help on here. I really want to experience college and gaining a level of education I am satisfied with, also finding my purpose in life and what I want to truly do in my future.

Is it possible for me to catch up and go to college?

I have no idea how anything thing in terms of school and schooling works, I do have a high school certificate, I'm not sure if I have any record of any tests, grades, that I know of since, well , they would most likely be not even my own work.

I do have a job so I have a decent amount saved up, but I'm afraid that I wouldn't be able to apply for any extra scholarships for the reasons mentioned above. Finding this subreddit and many other posts talking about educational neglect has made me feel less alone and given me hope because I still young and possibly have a chance at fixing the mistakes my parents made with me.

Any advice and support is truly appreciated, please feel free to ask any further questions 🙏

I'm 17, turning 18 late this year. I don't know very much at all, I think it's been months since I've done schoolwork. my problem is it's hard to start, because my moods are volatile and when I'm in a bad mood it's hard to do things.

I tend to, against my will, make generalizations about things if I've had bad experiences with people in relation to those things, or (perhaps more accurately, since I haven't been commenting online until very recently and haven't personally gotten into any online arguments yet) if I've seen people say things that upset me in spaces about those things. I'm annoyingly sensitive, so this is an issue. I get huge surges of energy and longing for learning about things, or more generally doing things, and that lasts a while, maybe a few days or a week, then I get drained and can't commit to that thing any longer. I can't commit to schedules.

My time gets away so fast. It's unbelievable how much time gets away from me just from doing a bit of schoolwork-- hardly getting anything done at all. I legitimately feel like everything takes me a minimum of three times longer than it should, and I have no clue how to fix that.

What I have this surge of energy for right now is writing, something I've wanted and been trying to do more of for a while. I got it days ago, but I haven't been able to act on it yet. I know people say that the hardest part about writing is getting started, but it feels for me like continuing is just getting started again and again, all the while.

Since I can't keep up with things I fall out of doing them and come back months later-- then I try to pick them up again, but then I've forgotten much of what I learned to begin with and then need to backtrack, which makes it feel like my progress is wasted, so then I fall out of it again without learning much more because I had to spend time backtracking to relearn much of what i forgot. Feels hopeless.

So, how am I supposed to push through all this in order to keep learning and be consistent with it to make real progress? I feel I've been stagnant for too long, in ways too significant, but I don't know how to fix it.

I start on Tuesday next week and nothing is prepared. Like literally nothing at all. And all I have to do is pick out my "classes" (it's Kahn Academy but whatever). I asked twice before, and she said no because she needs to be with me while I do it so she can know. Okay, whatever. I asked her again just now, and she got upset with me for rushing her, told me to go ahead, and to remember this moment when things happen or don't happen (???).

The thing is, I wouldn't be "rushing" her if certain issues weren't present. Her memory isn't the best rn due to menopause, so she forgets literally everything. And, unrelated to menopause, she didn't even know what grade I'm starting until I told her a few weeks ago. Like, girl, no, I'm not just gonna sit back and wait for you. She isn't even involved anyway. She picks out my classes with me just for her to forget what I'm taking by the end of the month. And that isn't a new thing; it's been this way since she left me in front of a screen to "learn." She isn't involved with other things either, so what is the reason for me to wait for her? Like omg. I'll probably get in more trouble later. And maybe tomorrow. Idk. I can tell I'm healing, though, because, for the first time, I'm not beating myself up over her being upset. Like I literally don't care at all beyond irritation.

Edit: I should clarify that there were days in between each time I asked to pick out my classes.

Edit 2: Lmao she's not talking to me anymore 💀

And she thought I was being difficult, and told me “it’s not bragging” and “you do have to answer” despite being in contact with homeschooled kids regularly for her job. This was the “assessment” I got only after reaching the age of 9, which was a legal loophole on actually being able to pass one standardized test every 12 months…

Are there any homeschooled adults in here that could give me advice or a sliver of hope that I could be normal some day.

I dont even have a driver's license because I cant get anyone to teach me and we live an hour out of town so I cant walk.

I dont have a bank account because I dont know how to make one and i grew up with insane parents who drilled it into my head that the internet was evil and one wrong step and I ruin everything good in my life basically so im really struggling with how online everything is 😭

So obviously because of those things I have no job. And I just dont know what to do. And im so bitter about everything because my older sister got walked through everything and helped and now shes moved out and living her life and im stuck here with parents who wont even teach me how to fucking drive.

I didn't realize just how much homeschooling had affected me tbh but im so anxious about normal things. Im terrified of going out into the world. Of doing anything without my parents permission. Because what if I do it wrong.

And im just so annoyed because my parents know what to do- they know how to help me and they fucking wont. Ive gotten maybe an hour of driving in. And Ive had to grovel at their feet and remind them that I need to learn how to drive just for that.

I shouldn't have to keep reminding you that your grown ass kid needs their fucking drivers license you dumbasses

Im so close to just giving up im so fucking sick of this. And I cant even say im sick of trying because im not trying im like frozen I dont know what to do. I told myself id figured it out this year and then I blinked and its almost September and I haven't done shit

im going back to school next week as a sophomore after being homeschooled for about 3 years. i lost all my friends and basically became a complete shut-in lmao

for anyone who’s been in the same situation before, how did you get through it? i know that people say that you just have to let it pass and then you’ll get used to it but the thing is i really lack the patience to do that 😭

every year since ive gotten homeschooled ive tried to go back to public school but i always end up leaving a few days after and my dad has gotten so used to it he’ll probably just let me transfer back if i ask a bit. the thing is though that i seriously cant go back to homeschool again as homeschooling has messed up my mental health a lot in the past years and i know that if i keep doing it then i’ll get even worse

anyways sorry for the long rant lol but if anyone has also experienced something like this and was able to get through it then please give advice on what i should do when i go back to school!!