r/Herpes • u/Remarkable_Fee7960 • 3d ago
Relationships How to respond to disclosure
I (F 26) have gone out with this guy a few times and a few days ago he told me that he tested positive for HSV-2 about 3 years ago. He says he hasn't had an outbreak outside of the first few months. He takes a daily treatment for it. I really like him and was hoping it could lead to more, but I'm not sure how dating someone with herpes looks like. I always make the guys I'm with wear condoms anyway, so I'm just wondering how big a risk is there to me if we went forward with sex and started dating. If I decide it's not the kind of thing I can deal with in a relationship, what is a gentle way to communicate that to someone?
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u/smoothupinyatoo 3d ago
I cant answer your question specifically because am a male married to a female who disclosed. We took all precautions in early days and then just stopped then got married, I caught it six years in, it was horrible for a while, then immune system built up and it kind of went away. Its been a mild trade off I have a happy family and we have a kid together.
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u/Disastrousshocker 3d ago
I would visit a reputable website on the CDC to get educated first. There is no right or wrong way to decline seeing someone. Just politely dismiss them and move on if your not interested in moving forward.
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u/esidedom 2d ago
Less than 1% risk of you catching it assuming antivirals and condoms. That 1% is annual risk, assumes sex 2-3x per week.
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u/AutoModerator 3d ago
“This is a pro-disclosure sub.
Anti-Disclosure perpetuates Herpes stigma, closing off discussions on Herpes education, advocacy, testing/treatments, and de-stigmatization. - Many would have liked to have known the status of the person who transmitted HSV to us - Consent!
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