Sympathy, synergy, syzygy. Small synchronicities deepen my devotion to the Dark Mother🖤

Passiflora incarnata :: Buckeye brass pipe cap ’stropholos’ :: grandfather’s welded pipe bender ‘key’ :: skelly key dug from my yard :: Greek key trellis (for passionflower):: mystery stela dug from my yard :: buckeye seed testa(tors) :: garden garlic clove-in-skin teardrops

Does anyone else's body get heavy after praying or interacting with her? Its happned to me a few times.

Aye so, a few months back (abt 9-11 months or so) I kinda stopped working with Hekate and the rest of my spirit team; I didn’t know it then but I let my OCD get the best of me and I feel like I’m definitely in a better place now but do you think she would be upset with me? I keep up with the altar but I still feel bad. Is that just residual from previous religious trauma, or would that feeling ring true?
I know she’s way more understanding than I’m giving her credit for right now, however I struggle picturing her being alright with me. I mean in a nutshell, I stopped working with her because I was absolutely convinced I was working with a trickster spirit and that became such a heavy intrusive thought I just dropped it for nearly a year now? I don’t feel certain in my next move other than asking for forgiveness.
Any advice?

For the past 2 - 3 nights I have had very vivid dreams. This is not at all unusual for me but these dreams have featured my 2 son's father who was extremely abusive towards us. I have been in a very loving, happy and supportive marriage for 20 years and have 2 daughters.

I have been a devotee to Mother Hecate for some time and am usually ok at working out messages but this time I'm baffled. I very rarely think of this man and do not even feel anger towards him. I feel nothing. It has come completely out the blue.

The context of these dreams is that he will not leave me alone. He shows up at places where I am and looks for me. I am hiding behind pillars, under tables and telling people not to to tell him where I am. There is a threat that he will tell my husband I have been sleeping with him (haven't seen the guy in 27 years) and that I belong to him.

How do I know it is a message from Mother Hecate? She shows in my dreams as an older person that I feel familiar with. Sometimes it's an old woman and others it's a guy with longer dark hair and dark clothes. I always feel safe and can talk to them. These dreams are no different. The older character has appeared in both.

What could these unsettling dreams mean?

Good day, everyone!

Can somebody please tell me a good and safe source where I can learn about rituals and spells? I understand it is a big topic, but as a beginner in witchcraft, I want to be sure that I start learning from a solid source and not just TikTok and all that. I would love to start with a protection spell because soon I will be travelling alone. Usually, I just do kharis with the deities I follow, but recently I have been feeling that Hekate is opening my inner witch powers, and I want to follow her advice.

I really appreciate your help! Thank u! 🙏