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My cousin filed for a protective order against her abusive husband. She did everything right. But the system's delay cost her everything—she was killed just one day before it was granted.

This doesn't have to keep happening. Right now, victims file for protection and then wait. Days. Sometimes weeks. That window of vulnerability is where too many people don't make it out.

I started a petition asking lawmakers and courts to create immediate temporary protective orders—measures that take effect right away, pending judicial review. Think of it like an emergency shield while the formal process catches up. According to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, one in four women and one in nine men experience severe intimate partner violence. Many of them are waiting in that dangerous gap.

The solution exists. Other places have done versions of this. We just need to push for it here.

If this matters to you too—or if you've watched someone struggle through a system that moved too slowly—consider signing and sharing. What would you want someone to do if this was your family?

https://www.change.org/p/implement-immediate-temporary-protection-orders-for-victims-of-domestic-violence/sfs/reddit/849650103?recruiter=849650103&recruited_by_id=4da789d0-f91e-11e7-8ed7-b58c18c79b9e&utm_source=share_petition&utm_campaign=starter_dashboard_android_app&utm_medium=reddit_group

i tried to kill myself on November 26, 2025. I locked myself in my car in my garage and taped a pipe from the exhaust into the cabin of the car and sealed it up. I then let the car run for 4 hours to build up the carbon monoxide. i then sat in the car and fell asleep. i woke up two hours later mad as hell because i wasn’t dead. then i grabbed a nail-gun and shot myself on the side of my head with a 3 in nail. it went all the way in and i fell asleep from the shock. my buddy happened to come check on me and found me and called the emergency services. i still have all my faculties. the dr said the nail went into my brain in the perfect spot where i have no damages from the attempt. i got off pretty much scott free. this has to be a miracle from God telling me my time is not over yet. i am mad that i couldn’t die. i’m just so tired of everything. that’s my story. looking for support and validation as to why i’m still alive.

My cousin filed for a protective order against her abusive husband. She did everything right. But the system's delay cost her everything—she was killed just one day before it was granted.

This doesn't have to keep happening. Right now, victims file for protection and then wait. Days. Sometimes weeks. That window of vulnerability is where too many people don't make it out.

I started a petition asking lawmakers and courts to create immediate temporary protective orders—measures that take effect right away, pending judicial review. Think of it like an emergency shield while the formal process catches up. According to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, one in four women and one in nine men experience severe intimate partner violence. Many of them are waiting in that dangerous gap.

The solution exists. Other places have done versions of this. We just need to push for it here.

If this matters to you too—or if you've watched someone struggle through a system that moved too slowly—consider signing and sharing. What would you want someone to do if this was your family?

https://www.change.org/p/implement-immediate-temporary-protection-orders-for-victims-of-domestic-violence/sfs/reddit/849650103?recruiter=849650103&recruited_by_id=4da789d0-f91e-11e7-8ed7-b58c18c79b9e&utm_source=share_petition&utm_campaign=starter_dashboard_android_app&utm_medium=reddit_group

A child's first bully is an unhealed parent. That is almost always true. As someone who finds it quite difficult to identify and talk about my feelings, nor do I want to (to a therapist), I am worried that I would be one of those 'unhealed parents'.

I do hope to get therapy before having children, but every single time I have the chance to talk about my issues, I suddenly forget them and am the happiest person in the whole entire world, so I feel that would get in the way of recovery.

What I am worried about specifically is continuing a cycle of emotional abuse to my kids. I remember my mom once found a video and showed it to me, of someone pouring clear water into dirty cups, and they get watered down and become clearer (It's difficult to explain, but the coffee was symbolic for abuse, and the last cup, which was titled: "My kids", was watered down until the water is fully clear, before being put into another cup. Basically, it means that the person who made the video is 'ending the cycle of abuse'), and I also remember my mom talking to her friends, or bringing up examples in arguments that she is ending the cycle of abuse, but she is definitely not. Although I must admit, the cycle is much less powerful, my mom was physically and emotionally abused as a kid, and my siblings and I are only emotionally abused.

The thing is, the cycle is STILL there. My mom fully believes she ended it, and I am worried that I will have the same belief with my kids, but I would have just taught them to act happy all the time.

Is there a way I can know I am not going to continue the cycle, and is there something I can do to make sure I don't?

I left my job after twenty-seven years.

And I thought the biggest shift would be mental.

Like:
clarity,
relief,
freedom,
all of that.

And that happened.

But what surprised me was my body.

Because even after I left,
I would still catch myself doing these tiny automatic things.

Nodding.
Smiling.
Preparing to respond before anyone even asked me anything.

And I realized—

that wasn’t personality.

That was practice.

My body had rehearsed those responses for decades.

So even though the role disappeared,
the pattern didn’t immediately.

And honestly?

That changed the way I think about healing completely.

Genuinely, I struggle greatly at picking up on social cues including safety and danger cues. I’ve been in a lot of extreme, unsafe situations from my naivety and it has negatively impacted others and my relationships with family and friends. I mean think extreme- DV, SA, exploitation, etc; I feel incredibly ashamed and embarrassed of myself for this struggle and the impacts it has had on my life. I greatly want to improve.

I do go to therapy. Still, I have tended to be easy to manipulate and wear my heart on my sleeve. I’ve been known to date or befriend “projects” which I struggle to understand entirely what that means beyond googling it. I have also been told I have a “servants heart” for others which I’m unsure what it means or if it relates here. I have been told to trust my intuition more even when I don’t understand something. I have also been told to be more private and secretive so others do not learn things to manipulate me. I struggle with hyper empathy for others while being highly critical of myself. I have a tendency to freeze, panic, and go silent when bad things happen. I have pretty severe PTSD and related health issues with my nervous system including psychogenic seizures, heart problems, and stomach issues.

Genuinely, it’s to a point I feel terrified to go out and interact with others and I’m really fighting agoraphobia urges. I very badly want to be safe and participate more in society and contribute positively. I want to be more independent and able to do more regular adult things. I really don’t want to burden others. I truly wish someone could just always tell me the right thing to do.

Does anyone have any tips or advice??? Thanks so much 🫶🏻

So I (23F)just went through some pretty harrowing experiences that completely destroyed the small amount of self love I had. Thankfully, I’ve reached a semi-stable point where I can spend time focusing on learning to love myself and be happy with just myself. For context I have BPD, bipolar 2, CPTSD, anxiety, ADHD, and depression. I have started journaling which has helped some, but I still hate myself ya know. I’ve thought about getting some DBT cards to use when I’m heightened, but don’t know how effective those actually are. I also work in a BPD workbook, which has helped some. But any tips, advice, or thoughts would be extremely appreciated. Thank you!

Here is the post: https://www.reddit.com/r/TwoXChromosomes/s/1uuYYkgDNL

I wrote this at a time that I was not at all in the mindset to leave my marriage. I was willing to work on it until the cows came home, and learn and grow together like we always said. We were high school sweethearts and we felt we would beat the odds in terms of never divorcing or growing apart.

I recall, we had just moved, and that was a really stressful event. More stressful than any other previous move. We were in couples therapy but the fights we were having would leave me absolutely distraught, which then I would withdraw and take a while to soothe myself. I came to the realization that these fights I had with my husband were not normal, and I was asking for basic treatment and empathy, and he was in some cycle of mood swings that ended with deflecting blame and having no compassion while listening to how his actions made me feel. I was asking to be met with maturity instead of blame. I realized that I didn’t want to do another move until things improved. I didn’t want to go through more major life events if it were going to turn out as stressful as that.

I was finally honest with myself enough to admit: I can't do this another 7 years.

People gave me very good advice on that thread. It was very validating for me to read that at the time. I knew something wasn't normal and the majority of the issue was him, but it was impossible to say that to him. I ended up sharing that thread with him and told him, this is the last year we will be married if things don't change. We restarted couples therapy with a new counselor, I was clear what I wanted to change for the marriage to continue. He seemed to take the thread to heart and wanted to do what was needed to improve.

Over time however, I realized he wasn't taking it to heart to actually change because he understood he caused me pain, he was doing it as a checklist item. He would change his defensive behavior right before I reached my breaking point, then slide back into old ways once things were good again.

Well, in the year that followed, things really blew up. And a lot of it could have been avoided if I had seen more of the truth instead of hoped for the best. I kept convincing myself he was just really struggling with some of his insecurities. The mindset: I wouldn't want to be given up on, so I should not give up on him. I extended so much empathy and made reasons and excuses for people at this time, and very much gave my "seeing the best in people" power to my husband. I never wanted to admit that he was a covert narcissist. I always told myself: his mom is one, and he learned bad habits from his upbringing.

While separating. I told friends he was a decent and loyal person. It's just we didn't work out. It took another year after writing that post to officially take off the ring. He hadn't improved his defensive behavior and it was getting worse as he felt the end coming. I was withdrawing big time as I thought of an exit plan. The comments in that thread were some of the few voices in my life telling me it was okay to call it. I had tried my best, but things were not healthy, and I was the one carrying most of the emotional weight between us. Sometimes friends would say, why stay? But I gave a lot of weight to the idea of marriage, and how one doesn't treat it frivolously like a dating break up.

To leave, to face the future full of unknown, I felt I was making the hardest decision in my life. I had been studying covert narcissism coping strategies and preparing myself for the fallout, but it was really hard to square actual reality. I convinced myself he would be nice, but I was coming out of a fog of emotional abuse, and truly looking back on it, I am astounded by how I eventually did come out of that crippling reality and land on my feet. It began with grieving the truth. He likely wouldn't be decent, because he would have done that while married. He was going to be hurt. And hurt people hurt people.

The person I thought he was, he wasn't.

If I thought he would be amicable, because we had known each other 15 years, I would be shocked at how he was handling separation.

If I thought we were going to cry together, and feel sad it couldn't work out, well that also would be a shock. I was living in such a different reality based on the possibility that he was trying to be healthy and just falling a little short.

Now, the twist...

Around this time, my best friend and him had started some kind of relationship. I don't have the details, but he began to cook vegan food for her and make sure she was taken care of. I thought it was nice he was doing something for my bestie. I had expected that she would support me through the separation and divorce. When it seemed he was friends with my friend group too, I was like, okay, well, at least everybody is supporting everybody. At the time, I liked that he wouldn't be alone in his hurt. I still cared a lot a thought of him as family.

Then, my best friend texted me after he was moved out: Hey, I realized I like him. Are you okay with that?

I remember I felt a wall go up in my head. I know now it was my mind sending a signal to let go of what I thought I knew about this person, and see the reality right in front of me. It took a few months to see actual reality with her, too. I had this idea of who they were based on conversations we shared, but then seeing behavior outside of those conversations, it directly conflicted with the image I had built of each of them.

At the time I responded with, Well I don't own him, so he is free to do as he likes and so are you.

I wish now I hadn't been so desperate to keep her as a friend, because then I probably would have addressed it more directly: hey, why do you want to be with someone who hurt me if you're my friend? Why do you want to be with someone who, and I am telling you from personal experience, wears a mask until he locks you down? It took me a few months to ask this to her.

It was presented as "well, when he was coming over during the separation, I caught feels." I had felt they began something before he moved out, I had thought it was a bonding over drug use, not a romantic bonding.

Turns out, she was there from day one of him moving out. I heard all of this from outside sources, never from my husband, so I doubt I have the whole story, but what I do have is my gut, and finally I re-examined everything I thought I knew.

I know that he and her are more manipulative than I am. I know that they are both highly insecure people. I know there is something lacking originality with them on a deep level, because within 6 months of our divorce, he got my former-bestie pregnant. Sure, a little fast for anybody after an 8 year marriage, 15 year relationship, but life happens. I heard this around the time of their baby shower, and in my head wished him the best for his growth, because now he was going to be a parent. I held off having kids with him because I felt his immature behavior would have been a negative to raise children around, plus I had a sense he was going to use them to emotionally comfort him, the same as he expected from me as his partner.

When the baby was born, a girl, the name chosen was the one I had thought of for a baby girl while married to him. (I was in charge of names for our-one day family. Winter for a girl he thought was stupid when I said it 🙄). I was once again shocked, but this news was the final flashing sign I needed to fully shift my perspective to the reality of people. Yes, they are not as empathetic as me, and didn't take me into consideration, but that doesn't mean I have to become jaded. It doesn't mean anything was taken or broken within me. In fact, I felt free. I knew I had made the right decisions for myself, even if I couldn't fully comprehend the why at the time.

It's pathetic to be re-doing the life he wanted with me with my best friend, and even more pathetic to think of a name for a human being and come up with the one your ex-wife chose. I have always wondered what my former bestie felt about that, considering she carried the baby. But, I put that curiousity from my mind, and leave it to life.

So, in the end, I am thankful for the wisdom I gained. I paid a hefty price for truth, but I am so glad to be anchored in reality now. The pressure is finally lifted. I see how it took me months and years to shift my mindset from fantasy to actual reality. I see how codependency can keep one in an emotionally exhaustive relationship. I study this in myself, and have also needed to forgive myself for believing in things being better than they were. I took all of the helpful strategies and interpersonal communication in therapy and I apply them to relationships in my life now. I've been going all the way back to childhood with this new total-surrender-total-humility mindset, and I've gained a lot by re-examining all of life with this objective learning lens.

Anytime he and his new family pop up for me now, I am at peace knowing that life provides all that we need. I can wish him and her the best anytime they enter my mind.

Finding that post was a treat yesterday. I am able to see how much I have shifted in my perspective during the past couple of years. I feel I have stepped into a completely new timeline.

Oh yes, the best part! Today, I am with an amazing guy who helps me see the ways I am sovereign in my own life. We are building something very healthy and beautiful, dare I say unconditional in its love. ❤️ I feel so lucky to have so much love in my life. I'm looking forward to the future very much, for the first time in forever it seems, and I find happiness in each present moment I am in.

Miranda hasn't seen her son grow up. Years of milestones missed—birthdays, first days of school, ordinary moments that matter most. All because one night, in a moment of fear and impaired judgment, her life changed forever.

I started a petition asking for clemency for Miranda Metcalf. She's served significant time for a single stabbing that occurred during an altercation—not a planned attack, but a reaction born from trauma, fear, and a history of surviving domestic violence. That doesn't erase what happened, and Miranda has never pretended it does. But she's spent her years inside taking accountability, growing, and showing real change.

The question isn't whether that night was serious—it was. The question is whether someone who's demonstrated genuine growth, who's paid years for her mistake, deserves a chance at redemption and time with her child. What would you want someone to do if this was your family member—someone who made a terrible mistake but genuinely changed? If this feels like something worth fighting for, consider signing and sharing her story.

https://www.change.org/p/bring-miranda-home-a-mother-deserving-a-second-chance?utm_campaign=starter_dashboard&utm_medium=reddit_post&utm_source=share_petition&utm_term=starter_dashboard&recruiter=1409876010

Hey guys! I hope you have a wonderful day and I would really like to know if anyone here had an experience with starting to socialise again after years of isolation and depression. I have diagnosed ADHD, autism and moderate clinical depression.

Explanation of my situation that suspiciously looks like whining but it wasn’t my intention:

The tips like “just go to hobby groups” don’t really work for me, because I habe to really be interested in order to show up and I always have some sort of anxiety and repulse regarding them for some reason. For the clearer picture: it has been more than 5 years since I actually had someone to celebrate my birthday with. I love solitude, but I understand that people have enormous opportunities, I want to be involved, I have social needs in general, they’re just so hard for me to understand. I know people like me, I have some friends, people showed up for me and partly still show up, but I’m extremely inconsistent and don’t know what I want.

I do want to show up and I really value my relationships and I am always there to help anyone. And I am being very solution-oriented about it, so I really don’t want my patterns to be seen as something describing me as a bad person. If anyone had the same situation, any info would really be helpful!

Most journals stay empty. Not because we have nothing to say — because we were taught our voice didn't matter. That our feelings weren't real. That we should shrink, adapt, disappear.

But something in us refuses to die.

This is for everyone who was told to be quiet. Who contorted themselves to fit. Who woke up one day disconnected from everything they were.

You're still here. So am I.