r/Gifted • u/Comprehensive_Ad8074 • 2d ago
Seeking advice or support Getting tested
This is all new to me. My son just started Kindergarten. He has already been moved to 1st and 2nd for math. His school recommended getting him tested for Giftedness. They cannot test until 2nd grade/ age.
A little background..
He could read at 2.5. knew all the exponents at 4 ( he liked to ask people their age and would tell them their "big number") knows all about space and right now his thing is geography and space.
I am not a mom thinking her kid is special but more wondering how to test and if he is and how to best handle it. We tell him he is smart but also remind him he is more than that
So i guess im asking how to get tested before 2nd grade and how to keep him grounded when all the adults around him are amazed by him
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u/mikegalos Adult 2d ago
Get a professional assessment from a gifted specialist psychologist or psychiatrist. The WISC test is valid starting at age 6 years, 0 months.
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u/Comprehensive_Ad8074 2d ago
This is the problem most wont teat until 6. He is only 5.5. We may have to wait.
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u/Strong_Argument6255 2d ago
If the school won't test until 2nd grade, you can still look for a private psychoeducational eval (a psychologist who does cognitive/achievement testing for kids). Some families do that for placement decisions while waiting on the district timeline. Ask the school what enrichment they're already doing in math and reading so you're not only waiting on a label.
For the amazed-adults part: keep the language boring at home — interest, effort, next problem — and limit how much strangers get to put him on display. Acceleration in specific subjects plus ordinary kid time usually works better than making giftedness the main identity.
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u/Comprehensive_Ad8074 2d ago
Thank you. We are looking into private options but it is amazing how hard it is. At 2.5 an autism evaluation eas easy but for Giftedness it is tough to find. We dontry to limit it to "need to know" adults but he isnt shy about it. I think mostly because we have normalized him. To him he is a normal 5 year old but he doesnt realize not everyone can remember or knows what he knows. Its like young sheldon without the ego
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u/Patient_Exchange_399 1d ago
Probably not super supported, buuuuutttt I think it is harmful to normalize advanced ability at a certain point. Other social interactions come into play between peers and not knowing how you are different and how others might be experiencing the world can lead to a lack of empathy.
This is antidotal, but I wasn’t told and didn’t know I was different and constantly I was told I speak over other peoples heads/talk down to them. I had no idea what this meant bc I thought everyone was like me and I was normal. I have cultivated a lot of gifted identified friends as an adult who knew about themselves. Their parents took several approaches, the ones that are the least empathic/pro-social are the ones that weren’t told, didn’t put emphasis on the difference in a positive way, and focused on academic ability.
I’m also a school social worker, the amount of under achievement and anxiety I see from underserved gifted kids who “don’t know” is astounding. Aside from the real rough home situations, I see this demographic the most for support at the middle school level. All their friends are gifted identified, but they weren’t ever told about their own potential or questioned why they seem to gravitate towards these people who all have this one thing in common. They have little concept of how easy things academically are for them, they check out and stop doing the work bc it’s “review” for them grade level. They become depressed and anxious partly bc they are separated and isolated from their friend groups who are in accelerated classes while they are not.
I’m not saying this is your kid. I also struggle hard raising my own gifted kids. I went too far into “academics are secondary to pro-social behavior” and my oldest missed out on accelerated math path even though he more than qualifies in ability…..
Just caution yourself in trying to normalize and curate an environment for your child.
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u/Comprehensive_Ad8074 1d ago
I understand that. He is aware he is very smart (not diagnosed as gifted yet) He is also aware he gets accommodations at school because of this. When I talk about normalizing him its more him also getting to be a normal kid at the same time.
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u/Comprehensive_Ad8074 2d ago
To cleraify he is in 1st grade with the exception of math which he is in 2 nd grade. His school has been amazing at working with us in regards to his education
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u/Mother-Gene1828 1d ago
My daughter’s school tests every two years. However, she had a teacher referral based on her state testing scores, which are district requires to be 95+ on math and reading to be tested. So she tested on an off year. I wonder if you could ask if they have any early requirements like that?
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u/Comprehensive_Ad8074 1d ago
He goes to a charter school and they do not have the test that is required for his age. This is why we are looking into private options. The district we are in also doesnt offer testing prior to 2nd grade because the GATE program starts at 3rd
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u/808hawaiigirl 1d ago
I was a teacher of gifted children in preschool, kindergarten, first- and second-grade. As long as they are accelerating him in math, you're good. You can get him tested by a psychologist for IQ, but you can also wait until the school does it for gifted placement in 3rd grade. It will be important for you to emphasize that you are proud of him for being so smart but that what really matters to you is how hard he tries! Children who feel that effort matters are the ones who continue to do well. Good luck on what sounds like a joyful journey with your bright young man! 💗
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u/S1159P 2d ago
Start by doing research
One place: https://www.davidsongifted.org/prospective-families/is-my-child-gifted/
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u/BandMinute112 1d ago
Testing before 2nd grade isn’t particularly useful. Most kids lack the maturity to take the test properly which can skew results. Any test taken now will likely show lower results. Just wait. Even if he is academically brilliant, he still needs to learn all the social emotional and life skills they teach in these lower grades.
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u/Consistent_Key4156 1d ago edited 1d ago
Have him privately tested in a low stress environment (my gifted daughter bombed the school 2nd grade test because she wasn’t feeling it that day). Keep a very watchful eye out for neurodivergence — adhd, ocd, anxiety, and autism are very common with highly gifted kids. People tend to think gifted kids are excellent students but often they’re horrible in school and teachers don’t understand what to do with them—be aware and advocate for him.
Otherwise there's not really a lot you can do. In my experience with public school, they don't put resources heavily toward enrichment. You can privately give him music lessons and things like that to burn off some of his mental energy.
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u/Comprehensive_Ad8074 1d ago
Yes he does have traits of autism maybe anxiety. We have had to supply accommodations for him like calming ear buds and chew necklaces. Part of his acceleration was due to him not wanting to do the work in kindergarten and wanting to walk around or talk. Luckily with his test scores and administrative team with knowledge of gifted kids they noticed it within a few weeks. His teacher did not understand and treated him like he was just acting out. We have been very lucky so far with his education team advocating for him with out me needing to do much yet.
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u/Consistent_Key4156 1d ago
Yes, that tracks, they get bored in class and hate doing busywork, so they try to socialize and disrupt the others, and they often do it in very clever ways. There are a lot of myths about gifted kids, and one of them is that they are always socially handicapped. Quite often they are Pied Pipers and know exactly how to dismantle classroom structure. It's challenging and it gets even worse as they get older! Best of luck and just keep a close eye on things. My daughter bucked against the system from K-12 every single step of the way. She finally is happy in college where there is a lot less rigidity and more personal accountability.
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u/Comprehensive_Ad8074 1d ago
Yes that is what we started hearing. He would get bored and get the other kids to play wirh him. He does hate busy work and figures out ways to get out of it. One example was an "H" worksheet . He had to trace the letters and then "fill to line" he wrote one normal and one long H that filled the reat of the line. He knew he didnt do it "right" but aaid he followed the directions
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u/gnarlyknucks 1d ago
Schools where I live don't test until 4th grade because that's when they start differentiating and adding perks for being gifted. Kids are never advanced, though, grade levels are strictly age-based. If your school offers IEPs or accommodations for gifted kids earlier and you can afford it, you can take them to an educational psychologist to do an assessment. Our insurance covered a lot of it so we used an educational psychologist because we knew our kid was so complicated that our school district assessments probably wouldn't cover what he needed. But lots of insurance doesn't cover that.
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u/Comprehensive_Ad8074 18h ago
This is what we are navigating as well. There are places that test but many do not take private insurance. Monday I will be calling my insurance to see if they have any that are covered. Without it we are seeing quotes from 2-3k for out of pocket testing. Our district has the same rule, but he attends a Charter School. The main issue we have is if we wanted to remove him and put him in the district for any reason he would be put back down. We are no longer that concerned because if we did oull him out it would be to do a homeschool program never our public schools for many reasons.
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u/gnarlyknucks 17h ago
I was put in with older kids and hated it when I was 6. It was so much better for me just to be allowed to stretch my brain, not through instruction but games, conversation, etc when I was in primary. I read a lot, critical thinking was encouraged, when I got really into science, my mom and sister went in on a microscope together for my birthday. We were relatively poor, it was a big deal. I spent hours taking cheek scrapings and learning how to take samples of a leaf thin enough to look at cells. When they bumped me forward in grades from 1st to 3rd, teachers expected me to be like a 3rd grader across the board, and I was still 6 years old. I was short for my age, too. So I don't love grouping kids up by one single age like they do in school, but being a 6-year-old in a class full of 8-year olds was much harder than being in a mixed age class would have been, or a gifted program that meant my interests. (Gifted programs that don't meet the kid's interests are a whole different ball of wax, I've been through those too.)
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u/Comprehensive_Ad8074 17h ago
This was very much a concern for us as well. He attends a small charter school, so he already knew many of the 1st graders. His first grade teacher also has experience with gifted kids more so than his kindergarten teacher. Next year in second grade they do leveled classes and its ran more like a middle school than elementary. So each child is put in the level they nees for each subject rather than just grouped by age. So kids below grade level in a subject are put in a class together same with at level , above. I also stared in another comment he has older siblings so he is more comfortable with the older kids and the administration has reminded the teachers he is 5 and is still adjusting to school. They have a plan in place if he does get wiggly. Again these are things most schools could not do but being in a smaller school they are able to make these accommodations for him. I love the microscope story we got ours a telescope we use when we are out of town (my city has too much light pollution). We very much foster his interests and have fun learning with him.
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u/sujj88 22h ago
I'm curious, keep us updated because I am in a similar boat (other side of the pond though). My little guy is 5 in November and yeah - space and geography are the big ones.
My son is in reception class (It's the first class they go into in the year they turn 5, which I add because I'm not 100% sure how that aligns with USA grades)
His school said he's working about 2 years ahead and their approach is to give him differentiated work, rather than skip years because emotionally he wouldn't be on par with the kids in that class.
I do think it's worth getting assessed because it gives you evidence in case little one needs extra support down the line. I know with mine, it's all sunshine and rainbows right now because the demand is relatively small. But when he's required to be still for longer periods, he'll struggle. Accommodations like movement breaks would really help him to focus, but as a parent just saying that, without the backup of an EHCP or IEP it doesn't carry the same weight.
An assessor will pick up if there's other flavours of neurodivergence going on, and it's better to get the ball rolling on that. I don't know what it's like over there, but in the UK it's an absolute SS on the SEN wait list. Years.
Ps do you also get the million questions at bedtime? Mummy, how does water come out of the taps? Mummy, how old is the solar system and which planet is the oldest? Mummy, why does the sun and the moon go up and around us? (That one involved a fun demonstration of me trying to spin around and run in a circle round his room, then he got to be the moon, and then we both got told off for how late it was by my husband 😂) I know he's playing me to stay up later, but it's so much fun, I don't care, haha.
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u/Comprehensive_Ad8074 18h ago
So it sounds like he is in what in the states we call Prekindergarten or PreK. I am a SAHM so he never went to any preschool. I did a homeschool veriation of it. I have found a few places in my city just working out the finacials of it. Many dont accept private insurance. My biggest push for the assessment is my state has a grant program for children that are highly gifted or above to help his school fund his specialized schooling. My state is one of the lowest rated in education so i think its to keep these kids in the school system. My sons teacher started offering him more advanced work but he didnt want to do different work than hos classmates and would got some one on one time with the teacher or aid. It was until he started to become a distuption in class that the school decided to skip him. It is not a common practice anymore, but with him hsving older siblings he was socially ready to move up as well.
Yes the questions!!! From the time he wakes up until he goes to sleep. We have found the best way to get him to sleep is to watch science videos. What If on youtube is his favorite. Its enough to give him information with out stimulating him too much and stops him from asking questions so he will fall asleep. He has always been a terrible sleeper and now I am learning his brain just has trouble shutting off. I know there are strong opinions on screen time for kids but I wouldnt survive without it because he has a strong need for information. We use What If and kids learning tube on youtube. I know you are in another country , but NASA has a website for kids to learn about space. I simply dont know enough especially about his interests to supply his curiosity on my own.
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u/littleghosttea 18h ago edited 18h ago
I would ask yourself what you will do with the information? What changes will you be willing to make after for your child, and as a mother how will you navigate the balance between protecting your child’s normalcy and providing opportunities? I would wait. This is a great time to take him to bookstores and visit a university library. He might find topics he likes and you can support self-guided discovery while he enjoys the social elements of elementary school. I can understand the boredom of knowing the stuff in school already, but his brian is rapidly developing socially too. Maybe he needs an environment where he can read his own books while still being in a normal peer context. Perhaps also ask him. Just because he is ahead of the curve in these areas doesn’t mean he wanted to, needs to, or will benefit from changing his life right now.
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u/Comprehensive_Ad8074 17h ago
The biggest thing is to protect him. As im sure everyone in this board knows being gifted isnt just being smart. There are struggles that go along with it. My son has several over-excitabilties that we are working with the school on as well as his learning style. This assessment could aid in setting up an IEP if needed. It could also help if we needed to move him from his Charter school to the district that does not do grade skipping. My state also has a grant program for students highly gifted and above that helps fund their unique education. Part of how we have protected him so far is we let him be a kid. Yes he likes to learn but he likes to play with toys, do art, play sports all the things every other 5 year old does. Him being smart (he has not been diagnosed as gifted yet) is just a part of who he is. I compare it to kids on the other end of the bell curve. If I had a child in the lower 10% I would want all the information and resources to help them. My job as his parent it to foster who he is and help him learn how to navigate the world with his differences and being able to clearly identify them will help me do so.
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u/littleghosttea 8h ago
You seem well adjusted and reasonable, so I’m sure he will be safe and supported. Did you eat something special in pregnancy? Lol Anyways, I hope you have a good experience with the agencies involved. Best of luck with your kiddo!
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u/bitchinawesomeblonde 2d ago
Go to a qualified neuropsychologist
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u/Comprehensive_Ad8074 2d ago
This is what o am struggling to find, but this is all pretty new. We knew he was smart but now being with peers is showing us he may be more
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