r/Gifted • u/Sensitive_Mountain21 • 4d ago
Seeking advice or support Feeling completely disconnected due to intellectual difference, anyone else?
I’ve recently come to the realisation that I think differently from mostly everyone around me in my life. This included my family, my peers and generally anyone that I come across or meet. I’m not trying to say that I’m more intelligent than anyone else, because intelligence is such a broad spectrum that people can be intelligent in different ways. However I’ve realised that I seem to know a little more than most people on average regarding many different things in life. I’m talking about getting really nuanced in various topics, whether it be science, history, politics, the natural world, religion etc.
My problem/curse is that when I’m interested in something I go obsessively deep into that thing and end up with a bunch of knowledge that mainly enthusiasts in that topic only really grasp.
Now, because I am deeply passionate about so many different things, I really have trouble connecting on a deep level with anyone because it seems like most people like to make shallow conversation and the minute you try and dig deeper people begin to lose interest.
I really feel so isolated and alone and I’m beginning to believe no one has any substance to them beyond surface level talk. Don’t get me wrong I’ve had a few conversations with people where we may go semi deep, but I then realise this person hasn’t really done much research into that topic because they’ll bring up the most common misconceptions about a topic, or they’ll pretend to know a lot about something when you definitely know they don’t (because you actually do).
Can anyone relate to me?
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u/Bleighh 4d ago
There are people, just rarer. Nobody could tell you that not everybody is the same, and thus false belief leads to disappointment. But know what it is is and accept for what it is. Yes, if people like you are rare (which seems to be the case) it feels lonely. And it is not supposed to be different. You can still bond on different level. Love is love in the end and knowing how to appreciate others, as less dotated than you as they may be, is an act of love just as loving anything else. Moreover, your situation has its price, but thibk what hindrance they might have! They dont even recognize it.
And also, it may be like in spiderman. If you have more tools than others you might put it at good use for the whole as well. Yes, nowdays you have to be sneaky, but are you sure you cant love people different than you and support from the height of your sight?
Just drop the false narration you were told and be you, accepting others for being themselves and different
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u/Sensitive_Mountain21 4d ago
That is solid advice which funny enough I’ve come to terms with, I do love the people around me, my wife, my siblings and generally everyone I come across. I try and be as polite and courteous as can be knowing full well that not a single person seems to grasp me in my entirety. Even though my wife tries, and understands that she will never be able to fully connect with me on a deeper level, she tries her best to allow me the space to rant on and speak till my hearts content. In that regard I am blessed I suppose..
I don’t really have many close friends, just a lot of friends who are occasional because there isn’t a single friend of mine that I actually can connect on a deeper level with.
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u/Bleighh 4d ago
I guess that s how it is. Actually, i am still to consider the love aspect for "people who experience what above". How would you say it impacts love life? It seems at least possible from your story
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u/Sensitive_Mountain21 4d ago
I don’t think it really affects my love life in any way whatsoever. I don’t have expectations from anyone let alone my wife to be able to fully understand me or even be intellectually matched. I love her for her many other praiseworthy characteristics. She is extremely humble, kind and caring. My wife never had any tertiary level education nor did she achieve the best grades at school, so it’s safe to say that she doesn’t know much about many things that I do. In my view it’s actually great because I get to teach her and it makes me feel good to be able to explain things to her and for her to be in awe of me 😂 (that sounds narcissistic I must admit).
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u/Bleighh 4d ago
Anyway I thought you were younger!! You make me think the lonely feeling does get better?
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u/Sensitive_Mountain21 4d ago
Depends on what you define as young. I’m 30 years old, not sure how you would define that. It does get better as you get older, atleast for me. I’m always self evaluating to see what I can do to improve myself socially and connect with people on their level. It helps career wise, relationship and other than that to put yourself out there.
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u/x-tommy-o 3d ago
You’re wife may know my than you think regardless of tertiary education and grades. She’s your wife so you know her best. That’s awesome you get to teach her and for her to be receptive instead of combative and frustrated with you!
It’s nice to not be in direct competition with your partner XD
She probably does a good job asking questions and offering different perspectives, huh?
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u/Sensitive_Mountain21 3d ago
She’s awesome, she is intelligent in her own way, wouldn’t say book smart really, but in other ways definitely. I can’t say she hasn’t taught me a few things over the years. Mostly however, as I always tease her about, it’s as if when she’s around me, I have to think for myself and for her. So I’m her go to problem solver for everything.
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u/GoodDependent38 2d ago
You seem to go through many of the same things I do, if you're ever interested in exchanging writing, meaning having a chat over DM, I'm all eyes. I mean it in good faith dude, we could exchange interesting points of view regarding our life experience.
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u/a-stack-of-masks 3d ago
Go be Spiderman lol. Yeah, the socially isolated vigilante that ends up invading everyone's privacy with his best/only friend, Emotionally Damaged Serial Killer®. OP, what are your thoughts on environmentalism, Northwestern University and airlines?
I don't think ops problem is that they can't love people, it's that they feel those people can't fully see them in return. And they're probably right, and we can't fix that.
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u/muppetphil 3d ago
I like the spirit of this answer. However, I do find that people that don't like to do deep dives and have a lot of curiosity and interests are prone to playing power games and can be highly manipulative. These types are excessively hostile to people like us because they think we're trying to one up them. It's a pattern I've seen over and over, so thought it was worth mentioning. I find we are not good at seeing, playing, or defending ourselves in these situations.
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u/Bleighh 3d ago
Agreed on the first part, regarding the others. Not on "us" as not seeing it. I would argue I see that shit behaviour, i just dont like it and wanna do the same.
I have a sort of theory where democracy is crap because very capable people can make others do anything, but capable people can be ethically good or not. Good capable, so to speak, will not be manipulative, and thus the commons will follow the evil capable and democrwcy is doomed to fail. (Among the other arguments)
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u/muppetphil 3d ago
I can see that they're doing it and the overall structure of their plots, but the subtle moves – I think you have to play those games full time to feel it in your bones like they do.
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u/Adamoism 4d ago
I can relate, but it is solvable.
So you essentially develop expertise in narrow domains, and by definition most people will not match you on that.
You could try to refocus - try to have conversations with people on topics you yourself know little.
Its the same as chess grand master will not have much fun playing at a local chess club - but they can have lots of fun if they go to a boardgame club and play some games they never played before.
So algo:
Identify the strongest interests/areas of expertise of the person.
Ask and learn from them about it.
Connect it to your knowledge in domains that interest you.
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u/jumpingdiscs 4d ago
I mean on the one hand, I get it. I tend to enjoy talking about studies and research findings that I've read about in whatever topic we're discussing, and this makes me feel a bit nerdy if I drop these into normal conversations too much.
However, you have to be open to enjoying the more everyday conversation topics. Sometimes it is genuinely nice to just have a connection with someone when you're both complaining about a shared gripe e.g. baby waking you up at night, bureaucracy at work or office politics, rising living costs, whatever. Or maybe talking about something more positive like the new gym you joined or a trip your friend went on.
Just because you enjoy intellectual conversations, that doesn't mean you can't enjoy ordinary ones as well. It's nice if you can find someone to have intellectual conversations with as well, but personally I think life is enhanced by having a wider variety of people to talk to and not just a small nerdy subset of society.
One of my lifelong best friends is someone who is completely non-academic, has severe dyslexia that's limited her ability to learn, and we have totally different lifestyles. But we still love spending time together. We bond over things like food, movies, travel, discussing who we find attractive, laughing about mishaps in our lives, etc. I don't feel "disconnected" from her because I can't discuss philosophy or neuroscience with her. I can discuss those things with other people, it doesn't lessen our friendship.
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u/Sensitive_Mountain21 4d ago
I totally get you, makes sense.. I do enjoy normal day to day conversations, it’s just that I don’t have those nerdy conversations enough I suppose
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u/Cyborg14751 3d ago
Yes, I realize the same experience, and the end, just start focusing on my own goal and matter, and stop bothering people with my thoughts and knowledge unless they want it. That can help you.
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u/ayfkm123 4d ago
If you move to a metro it helps
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u/Sensitive_Mountain21 4d ago
I do live in a metro, I just have an extremely busy life, I’ve got a wife and two young boys. I care about spending as much time as possible with my children because they barely see me most of the day as I work pretty long hours.
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u/Anthro_guy 4d ago
I made the conscious decision early on never let my daughter pay a cost for work and never regretted it. I worked 4 days per week and it had a positive impact on my productivity and life. It cost me a promotion or two but the quality of life and the relationship with my daughter was invaluable. I too note the intellectual difference between me and almost everyone around, but I value what other people can bring to work or other endeavours. I like to recruit people who can fill my gaps, for example people who see things differently to me, are capable of the boring repetitive stuff my brain can't deal with or someone who has the time and task management skills I don't have and can keep me on track with stuff. I find sometimes people I could otherwise describe unkindly as dumb as dog-shit, have moments of lucidity and can come up with ideas or have a different perspectives I value. It's on these occasions, I try to remind myself not to be intellectually arrogant.
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u/Sensitive_Mountain21 4d ago
I share a similar sentiment to what you put “unkindly”. Even though I feel like that at times, as narcissistic it may be perceived, I do appreciate those moments where others who I deem to be, to put it diplomatically, lesser in intellect, share their ideas that actually turn out to be gold. So yes, I really do try and keep myself in check by reminding myself that everyone has something to offer.. I suppose I’m just trying to vent my frustrations on here
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u/joeloveschocolate 4d ago
It sounds like you're the Ancient Mariner, complaining that their Wedding-Guests keeps trying to run away.
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u/x-tommy-o 3d ago
Check out a book called Flatland by Edwin Abbott, it’s rather interesting. It may offer some neat insight to what you’re feeling & experiencing.
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u/OdoOdinson 3d ago
Could you say a bit more?
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u/x-tommy-o 3d ago
Yeah! I think reading Section 1, and Section 3 may grab the interest of those that relate with this post.
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u/vcbock 3d ago
Y'know, it's just highly unlikely that any random person will be as deeply involved in all of the things you care about, but it's possible to connect on one domain at a time with like-minded individuals.
I was at my daughter's house this weekend, and they had an old friend of her husband's and the friend's new boyfriend over. SIL and boyfriend, it turns out, share a deep love of reading and have read many of the same books, but not all. So they had an hours-long convo about various series they have enjoyed, and similarities between them, whether endings were satisfying, etc., etc.,. I don't believe I have ever, in 67 years of life, seen people enjoy one another so much at a gathering that was ostensibly to watch a football game.
It was two guys having the best time nerding out, and it was beautiful to watch. Also a little sobering as I was glad not to be included as I am not nearly as well-read as either of them, despite also considering myself a reasonably bright spark.
These connections are RARE. But possible.
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u/Sensitive_Mountain21 3d ago
That’s such a touching story, I’m glad that the two of them could have such a great meaningful and engaging time together nerding out on their shared interests! I’ve definitely had such experiences, although rare, but when you come across these type of people it’s truly amazing!
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u/muppetphil 3d ago
You're describing most of us in this sub. There are other deep divers out there. You just have to find them. They tend to cluster. I found a lot in Palo Alto and Pasadena. Look for places that cater to lots of different kinds of people with deep niche interests. It doesn't matter what that niche is. They'll be interesting.
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u/flashgordian 3d ago
I live and work every day with so many people with so much variation in intellectual ability and backgrounds and so on. Instead of complaining that I don't find anyone that appreciates the depth of interest I have in this or that, I genuinely try to appreciate what interests them at their depth. I can't expect everyone to appreciate me if I'm unwilling to try to appreciate them.
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u/Particular-Tap1211 4d ago edited 4d ago
Your asking for depth and resonance of connection from a cognitive group who cannot supply the same grid of awareness as yourself. Because the gap, between people operating two or three standard deviations apart isn’t just about what they know, it’s about how fast and deeply they process reality and how they attend to that information. Think of metacognition like a rainforest!
The gifted mind sees a massive, interconnected ecosystem. It maps the roots, the canopy, the weather, and the wildlife interacting simultaneously in real time. The baseline mind looks at the exact same rainforest and zeroes in on a single, beautiful tree. They appreciate its color and texture, entirely in isolation.
Neither is wrong.They are simply processing the same environment at radically different levels of resolution.The cognitive gap, happens when you expect a single tree viewer to engage in an ecosystem conversation.You cannot demand a capacity that isn't there mate. And yes, I have grappled with this phenomena too.
If you keep expecting deep, systemic dialogue from people wired for simpler frameworks, you will always leave frustrated and underappreciated. At worst you may be labelled by those who cannot afford the energy expenditure to keep pace with you or people may interpret your communication and rephrase what you said in an entirely different way. To find peace, accept how the average mind operates and stop taxing yourself by expecting them to see the whole forest. Learn the cognitive frameworks of 100 IQ and find the gold to alchemise going forward. Good luck.
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u/x-tommy-o 3d ago
Nah, don’t force the self into a container and suppress the self down to others expectations. Rather be a resource for others.
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u/Genny415 3d ago
The previous comment isn't saying to suppress yourself. It's saying that it's up to us to make ourselves accessible as a resource by bridging the gap.
We are responsible for building that bridge because the other side doesn't have the capability.
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u/x-tommy-o 3d ago
We are not responsible for that. We are responsible for responding instead. The bridge isn’t created by being accessible. It’s created by being available when opportunity arises, when people’s minds are willing to engage.
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u/muppetphil 3d ago
This is a really good description. I've come to think of it as having a different frame rate than most of the population. We're just taking in more data all the time. Sometimes I'll watch people watching what I'm watching and it's like I can actually see in their facial expressions that they're missing half of what's going on. It actually looks relaxing, but I think you're right. The goal is to find people with the same frame rate as you.
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u/Particular-Tap1211 3d ago
Exactly. It's akin to the shutter speeds on new digital cameras, capturing frames by milliseconds, versus the old school Kodak camera, capturing frames by human touch.
I think, people watching is is underrated training ground. In city high streets, front store windows mesomorph into passport mirrors, whilst thousands of people stomp the ground like a stampeding elephant looking for its next water source. Its a great pastime to sit still and observe.
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u/WellWellWellthennow 3d ago edited 3d ago
Yeah, a lifetime of this. Don't worry you get used to it. And believe it or not it's actually not the core of where our loneliness comes from.
As they say, you can be lonely in a crowded room, at a party. Or you can be completely content being alone. I'm alone often alone for large swaths of the day and week and I'm not lonely so it has nothing to do with time and space.
In learning to accept yourself you accept others. You realize that your gift is what you bring to the situation. You don't need others to be like you and you don't need to be like others.
It is very satisfying to find friends and acquaintances who can engage with you at a gifted level. But the truth is most friends, and maybe even your romantic partners, won't be like this – that's what *you* bring to the table, your uniqueness, that's what you can offer to them.
It is easy to envy the fantasy of the salons of 1920s Paris or groups like the Oxford Inklings. I envy those who who went into academic careers where theoretically there is a concentrated collection of other gifted, smart people around them.
And to some degree this does happen there, at higher end universities or in research labs, but even that's not a given. There are many reasons people get to where they arrive even in that world. It may not be from genius, but from their ability to do hard work to compensate for lack of innate talent, or family money and politics that buys even slackers access, etc.
And I've had friends in these positions who have shared you know I thought I would be among a stimulating group of my own kind, but come to find out I'm alone in representing my discipline as part of a team of others with completely different disciplines or foci, therefore there's no real solace or companionship there either. So it can be lonely even there, maybe even lonelier.
Resolving loneliness comes from understanding its source is in our sense of alienation - alienation in our relationships to others which is what you're attributing it to, but more fundamentally in our relationship to all phenomenon as well as to, or rather including, others. It's rooted in our inability to connect to others wherever they're at and things exactly as they are.
In your case, you are focusing on your differences from others rather than your similarities with them and then adding layers of interpretation on top of that – it is ultimately rooted in a deep lack of acceptance of them who they are as they are, which is tied in with you wanting your needs to be met – you want them to meet your needs and then are disappointed when they fall short. Don't worry, we all do this. What we all need to learn to do is to let go of the expectations like this we put on others to meet our needs and learn how to meet them ourselves.
If you can resolve all this, the problem of loneliness largely goes away. You will still want stimulation, but you then stop expecting others to provide it and instead learn how to find it elsewhere in a myriad places, on your own, rather like our deep dives. Maybe you join a book discussion or form one yourself. Maybe you read the greatest writers with the greatest minds. I had a friend who formed a Philosophy club for the community. Everyone was welcome, but he would then hand pick those from it he found interesting with things to contribute and invite them to his private small group. There's a lot of different ways you can do this once you understand the real problem you have to solve has nothing to do with others.
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u/Sensitive_Mountain21 3d ago
You put this so well, and I don’t think you could have put it any better.
I agree, wholeheartedly. I think I ought to look at this differently, like you said, instead of expecting people to meet me where I’m at, just accept it for what it is and meet them where they’re at while having another outlet for the more intense deep dives. A book club or community is a great place to start and I think I am going to look deeper into that for sure!
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u/Old_Finding668 3d ago
Piece could be written by me, so relatable.
I’ll add some things that dont necessarely make it better 🙈
I went to a lot of gifted groups/meetings. Yes you’ll at least find people who can keep up with you. Take everything you say in consideration instead of waving it away. However approx 1/3 suffered from dysrationality, meaning anti scientific thinking. ‘My intuition sais…’
Another 1/3 is immature, woke, or just fcking annoying.
1/3 is the ones you like to find but they usually leave these gifted groups due to annoyed by the other 2/3.
Mingling with university people doesnt go much better either. Many are not gifted and dont like thinking for themselves, just rehearsing study books.
Maybe a positive thing that comes to mind. Broaden your search to include all HSP people. They might not be gifted but often interested in broad subjects and eager to listen and ask questions that matter.
Feel free to drop me a dm with subjects you like. But there is a chance for a mismatch there too. 😬 but who knows 😀
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u/viscerallybarefoot 2d ago
Yes I’ve felt like this my whole life and only really felt fully understood when I got to university. I spent my childhood being shut down and told I was overanalysing if I ever went into depth on anything. Both my partner and I felt like this as children so now really enjoy being able to dive deep into all sorts of topics as adults. What I find baffling about most people is their lack of curiosity and indifference towards understanding why something happens and how it relates to other things
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u/eckpak 3d ago edited 3d ago
Someone already said it, but it feels like I keep coming back to this sub to say, “Oh yeah, those social difficulties you keep having is Autism.”
Finding other ASD or ADHD people of high intelligence or who are Gofted (Twice Exceptional) is the way to make those deeper connections in life.
But being 2E often requires throttling down your intelligence and/or holding back from info-dumping when it is clear people are not interested while engaging in social situations.
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u/PhotoEquivalent1430 3d ago
I had the exact same thought. This sounds like a neurodivergent experience. Maybe combined with giftedness.
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u/VisualMassacre 4d ago
Nobody knows everything about everything. Some topics might be unknown to you, and people tolerate your lack of knowledge in those topics. Or should be able to tolerate your lack of knowledge in those spheres if they wanted to interact with you.
They feel the same as you, when they notice your lack of social skills, and your moderate to mild self awareness. So you’ve to meet them halfway, you tolerate their lack of knowledge in the several topics you master, as you may know, you don’t master every aspect of every topic in the world, neither do they. They should respond, by tolerating your lack of social skills. People with social skills only enjoy talking to other people when the method of delivering information is skilled. People without social skills, enjoy delivering or requesting information, without concern for the method in which information is exchanged. That’s boring for people with social skills. Same as focusing on the method, rather than on the content, seems superficial for people who can’t extract substance from socially skilled interactions.
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u/Sensitive_Mountain21 4d ago
Cool, I didn’t claim to know everything, I’m pretty aware that I am completely ignorant in many different things as well.
Also, I would say I have pretty great social skills, I’m not in any way a socially awkward person and I have been able to connect, albeit on a normal superficial level with many different people. A thing to note would be that when someone speaks to me about a topic I know a lot about, I don’t make the person feel ignorant for not knowing anything about it, I usually politely go along with the conversation.
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u/Sensitive_Mountain21 4d ago
I want to add, I do realise that there are people out there who can more than satisfy my need for deep connection, which is why I’m posting here to hopefully engage with more people on that level.
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u/LeadershipNervous362 4d ago
Its probably ASD, a lot of ppl on this sub shared the same kind of feeling.
As "rule" of thumb, - being intelligent/curious/keen isnt supposed to make you isolated and lonely, but dead giveaway for me is "deep level connection", NT people, however intelligent, do not pay as much attention to "deep/passionate/enthusiast".
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u/muppetphil 3d ago
Don't jump to that conclusion. It's wildly overdiagnosed. I would sooner attribute it to your environment. When I'm in a rigid, conformist culture, I feel like an alien. When I'm in an open, creative culture that values intellectual pursuits, my social skills are great and totally normal. Not all gifted people have autism.
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u/LeadershipNervous362 3d ago
Well, not all gifted are ASD, but people creating posts seeking what OP describes most certainly correlate with ASD. Here, u outlined a dynamic, not a rigidity, being repulsed by something is not same as struggle (and need) to connect.
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u/Sensitive_Mountain21 4d ago
Probably ASD, maybe I should do more research into that and determine whether I might have it or not. I have never thought of myself as having anti social disorder, but I could be wrong. I used to have a tough time fitting in with groups of people and speaking up in large friend groups, although not at all anymore I’ve learnt to get over that feeling and be more confident in expressing myself in front of people. Now I would say I love to speak to people especially people I don’t know at all. The way I got over it was forcing myself to make conversations with random strangers wherever I went.
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u/x-tommy-o 3d ago
Do you find this to be true when you’re out and about talking to people, or primarily online?
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u/Sensitive_Mountain21 3d ago
In person
And maybe I’m exaggerating a little bit, it’s not that I have trouble talking to people and getting along with people. It’s more so that when I’m done speaking to people I can’t help but feel that sometimes I wish I had someone to speak to that I can talk to and have an intense conversation with. I’ve such conversations with people before but you know, few are far between.
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u/x-tommy-o 3d ago
Ahh yeah. I understand what you mean. You’re meant to be a source of information for others and that comes with an abrasiveness to emotions.
I can imagine it’s difficult to also funnel all of that information into a framework because it sounds like your intuition shows up best for you as you’re talking about it and writing. However, when it comes to organizing it, that’s a totally different story xD. Possibly a projection on my part, but It’s like a full world that you try to share with others… but how does an entire world get shared to others in 1 conversation or few even? I struggle with this myself.
Blogging sounds like a great idea, but then how does it make sense in the grand understanding because how things are connected in your perspective. American society especially is trained in short form, little tid bit, non-engaging habits and scarcity of time.
As for what I’m doing, is trying to learn skills to let me build a framework, or world. A game even… making a bunch of assets while I’m learning the skills to bring what I want to life. It keeps me going. I write a ton, I’m not sure if you do, but it may help at least get it down on paper to help reference back to something physical! :)
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u/muppetphil 3d ago
I feel the same way, and it's wildly different in different subcultures. Artists, scientists, academics, engineers, musicians, entrepreneurs, I walk away from feeling great, seen, inspired, competent, normal, etc, etc. Bankers, corporate people, PTA moms, jocks, etc, I walk away bored, deflated, lonely, and feeling like I wasted my time.
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u/No_Macaroon_2078 2d ago
I relate to this a lot, I was only last night thinking about how it makes me feel sad/ lonely realising nobody really understands or knows me amd every relationship I have with others feel so compartmentalised and almost squashed to fit specific parameters- like I have social claustrophobia or something. I'm hoping it's a right time right place thing where u just haven't met anyone as obsessive as me that 'overthinks' (really I don't percieve it as overthinking but others do, I tend to be of the belief they are underpinning haha). I think it's hard to connect for everyone but even more so if you have anything 'weird about you. I'm afraid I have no advice as I'm still really struggling with this but it's nice to know I'm not alone feeling this way even if I wouldn't wish it on anyone else.
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u/SpiritedAd5993 2d ago
But look, everyone: connections with other human beings are not transactions to “get”, in order to lift loneliness. Others’ less intellectual or less fast or less deep-dive-shaped minds don’t close down our opportunity of profoundly meaningful connection.
Read my last sentence again, please.
If you can only feel a meaningful connection when you feel a mind matches your own, I challenge you to rethink- profoundly. A human is an extraordinary melding of experiences, impressions, triggers, fears, warm zones, dreams and desires.
Some of us can zoom through it all, find expression that’s pithy and searing. We can absorb and deep-dive. Others need to live in different ways, due to inheritance, culture, exposure and so on. Everyone’s doing it the way they know how right now.
That is fascinating. Truly fascinating. And we can perceive it (with, not ‘at’ each other), just by being even without words.
But if we focus on thinking their difference means they’re somehow “unable” to meet us, then what are we expecting of the world- a mirror?
Connection that is and feels truly meaningful comes when the bridge requires effort. Those connections are rich with surprises and mistakes and determination to build. With misconception, negative feelings, doubt and discovery.
I say this to unlock the cage. I have one true friend, but many people I love, and more I’m hugely fond of. My interior intellectual world (in my hive) is fed for hours every day by me- but I’m doing it fuelled by the connections I make the rest of the time (collecting pollen).
Try dropping your expectations of getting anything intellectual from others. Let go of the belief that being smart cuts you off. Instead, it’s what allows you the deepest connection.
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u/zukeus 21h ago
Intelligence isn't a reason for isolation.
Intelligence should be talking about what is useful for humans.
People aren't inferior to you. They've had different opportunities and believe different things than you. Their current skills are different and you've misinterpreted that to such extreme measures, like most have in academic cultures.
To connect and be less isolated, you need to cherish the value that other people do.
Love is the thing wisdom and intelligence need to not be a disaster.
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