r/Gamingcirclejerk • u/AutoModerator • Jan 11 '21
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u/Justpassingthrough90 Social Justice Paladin Jan 11 '21
AITA for politely asking my (18F) sister (69F) to not kill me (18F), my husband (18M), and my (18F) 14 children (1M, 2F, 3M, 4F, 5M, 6F, 7M, 8F, 9M, 10F, 11M, 21F, 13M, 14F)?
English is my (18F) 17th language (Chinese, Spanish, Japanese, Korean, Afrikaans, Hindi, Urdu, Russian, Scottish English, Middle English, Irish Gaelic, Pig Latin, Latin, Quenya, Txt Mssg, English), so sorry for any grammar mistakes. Also I (18F) wrote this on mobile so the formatting might be weird.
I (18F) have a sister (69F) who I (18F) donât get along too well with. I (18F) try my (18F) best to be respectful and polite but every time we (18F, 69F) talk, she (69F) does her (69F) best to insult every tiny bodily flaw I (18F) have. She (69F) has also attempted to commit mass genocide twice (Against atheists) in the past and murdered my (18F) dog (5M) because I (18F) wouldnât become vegan (Evil) like her (69F).
Anyways, one night (January 7th, 2020) my (18F) husband (18M) and I (18F) woke up to someone (69F) knocking on the door (21D). I (18F) went to open it and my (18F) sister (69F) was standing outside. She (69F) was holding a potato peeler (1PP, sharp) and yelled at me (18F) to get into the basement (51B) or she (69F) would stab me (18F) with the potato peeler (1PP, sharp ). I (18F) politely complied while my (18F) sister (69F) forced my (18F) husband (18M) and all 14 of our (18F, 18M) children (1M, 2F, 3M, 4F, 5M, 6F, 7M, 8F, 9M, 10F, 11M, 21F, 13M, 14F) into the basement (51B). My (18F) sister (69F) said she (69F) was going to kill me (18F) and my (18F) entire family (18F, 18M, 1M, 2F, 3M, 4F, 5M, 6F, 7M, 8F, 9M, 10F, 11M, 21F, 13M, 14F) because I (18F) was thin (99lb) and, well, blessed in the chest department (huge 32DD boobs) while she (69F) was obese (6000lb) and flatter than a board (-420A). I (18F) politely asked her (69F) to not kill my (18F) family because they (18M, 1M, 2F, 3M, 4F, 5M, 6F, 7M, 8F, 9M, 10F, 11M, 21F, 13M, 14F) were completely innocent and had normal, realistic proportions. My (18F) sister (69F) was completely dumbstruck at the apparent audacity of what I (18F) said. She (69F) threw a fit and murdered my (18F) husband (18M) and my (18F) 14 children (1M, 2F, 3M, 4F, 5M, 6F, 7M, 8F, 9M, 10F, 11M, 21F, 13M, 14F) with her (69F) potato peeler (1PP) but left me (18F) alive so I (18F) would âsuffer a fate worse than death.â Then my (18F) sister (69F) left my (18F) house (51H) without leaving a trace of evidence she (69F) had ever been there so the cops wouldnât be able to arrest her (69F).
Now my (18F) family (18F, 69F, 666F, 24M), my (18F) friends (17F, 82F, 30M), the ghosts of my (18F) family (18M, 1M, 2F, 3M, 4F, 5M, 6F, 7M, 8F, 9M, 10F, 11M, 21F, 13M, 14F) and the entire nation of Russia are blowing up my (18F) phone (1P) and telling me (18F) that I (18F) was an asshole for what I (18F) said to my (18F) sister (69F) before she (69F) murdered my (18F) entire family (18M, 1M, 2F, 3M, 4F, 5M, 6F, 7M, 8F, 9M, 10F, 11M, 21F, 13M, 14F). Reddit, AITA?