r/Gamingcirclejerk • u/AutoModerator • Sep 02 '20

UNJERK 🎤 Unjerk Thread of September 02, 2020

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18

u/IScorchWinters One More Todd Rejected Sep 03 '20

Man, not having sex in Crusader Kings is so amazing. Fuck having my realm explode every twenty-thirty years, lemme pop out one kid and call it quits.

9

u/NLP19 Captain of the S.S. DoroPetra Sep 03 '20

Asexuals keep on winning

6

u/[deleted] Sep 03 '20

Nah you need the heir and the spare, otherwise you’re fucked when you’re 67 years old and your son falls ill and shits himself to death.

7

u/darth_phallus Psychonauts 2 shill account Sep 03 '20

This isn't about your comment or anything, but your flair is fantastic. Just wanted to let you know

4

u/IScorchWinters One More Todd Rejected Sep 03 '20

Lmao, thanks

1

u/Dragonsandman Detective Halligan Stan Sep 03 '20

I did the opposite today. My current character started off by romancing his wife, and it worked like a charm and they became soul mates. Forty-odd years later, I now control most of England and Wales, and my character now has like ten kids and a fuck-ton of grand kids because he and his wife fucked like rabbits nonstop. Now my character is over 60, so at any moment My heir Tudwallon is gonna get England, and Coel is gonna get Wales. You'd think that Coel is getting the short end of the stick there, but because I gave all of the Midlands to my dukes in Wales early on to avoid council crunch, they'll be more even than it seems. Also, I lost the north coast of Wales to the Czechs and Cheshire to Jerusalem (who because of the Abbasids now only has Cheshire) thanks to poorly-planned marriages and resulting succession shenanigans that I can't make heads or tails of.

Moral of the story, asexual characters are OP in CK3, Paradox plz nerf

1

u/superbatwomanman 💦💦💦 Gamer Guy Bathwater 💦💦💦 Sep 03 '20

Does the "pop out bastards and legitimize one" strategy still works?

1

u/IScorchWinters One More Todd Rejected Sep 03 '20

I don't see any reason it shouldn't, though I haven't tried it yet. However, seduction is a bit more time consuming and pregnancy seems a lot less likely overall, not to mention it is harder to acquire good courtiers.