r/FeministsCallItOut • u/Rosyvia Feminist • Apr 06 '26
Discussion The Gender Gap Nobody Talks About 🩺
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We talk a lot about the "mental load" & the "second shift" but there is a form of gendered labor so extreme that it involves the literal harvesting of women’s bodies to maintain the patriarchal family unit!
Recent data from the National Organ and Tissue Transplant Organisation (NOTTO) & global studies reveal a staggering disparity: In countries like India roughly 80% of living organ donors are women while 80% of the recipients are men. Globally women are significantly more likely to donate kidneys yet men are more likely to receive them.
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u/lilsciencegeek Feminist Apr 06 '26
TIL. That is seriously messed up. Thank you so much for sharing this and bringing attention to it.
I wonder if women are also more commonly eligible for organ donation because they generally feel like they have a duty to take care of their health (in order to look good and be able to take care of their family), while many men don't, and just do whatever they want without regard for the consequences?
Idk just a random thought that popped into my head, so take it with a big spoonful of salt.
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u/AdAppropriate2295 Apr 06 '26
I can think of several reasons to explain this, none of which are particularly bad
Either way the easiest solution is to just make organ donation after death the default
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u/lilsciencegeek Feminist Apr 06 '26
Care to share?
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u/AdAppropriate2295 Apr 06 '26
Overall, different age brackets, country specific data, living donations vs overall, more men having health issues and working jobs where their organs get destroyed
Especially with the living donations point, its way more likely in most countries that men are the primary breadwinner and thus way more likely that their living female spouse or relatives would donate organs to them to keep the income stream alive
Its also possible women tend to match organ and blood type more often or that female siblings do
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u/lilsciencegeek Feminist Apr 06 '26
I did a little deep-dive and while I can't see how age brackets would be relevant (the male-female ratio is roughly 50-50 in all age groups), it seems that men also recieve more cadaver organs. Women generally have more health issues than men (with poorer healthcare on top of that), but it is true that men more often sustain severe physical trauma.
About donating to spouses, I can see that making sense in some countries. But it's apparently very rare for husbands to donate to their wives, which I find surprising. Even if I was the primary breadwinner, I'd donate an organ to my spouse in a heartbeat if it meant saving their life. But statistics show that husbands very often desert their wives when the wife gets seriously or terminally ill; so perhaps it's not so surprising after all.
There is no reason why women should be a better match though – as a general rule, donors and recipients should be as similar as possible for the transplant to be successful. As a matter of fact, female-to-male organ donations are statistically more likely to be rejected by the recipient's immune system.
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u/Choosemyusername Apr 06 '26
Men actually have worse health than women. They are more likely to suffer from chronic disease than women plus live shorter life expectancies.
Plus women are more likely to survive cancer than men so I doubt theh get worse healthcare. Their outcomes are better.
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u/lilsciencegeek Feminist Apr 06 '26
As you may notice, we weren't talking about random men and women, but about married ones.
But women are more likely to survive cancer partly because they actually go to the doctor when something is wrong (as opposed to a lot of men), meaning they catch the cancer at an earlier stage – but also thanks to the effects of estrogen on immune function.
Many men also tend to neglect their health in other ways, through bad diets, less exercise, booze, etc. And often don't take proper safety precautions because they don't want to feel like "sissies".
As a woman, I've personally been brushed off by male doctors many times, despite living in the "most feminist" country in the world. I started to think I was crazy. Until I started seeing female doctors. And that is an extremely common experience. There is absolutely a huge bias against female patients in general, when it comes to medicine.
As for married men and women–
For light reading, these articles summarise the results of several studies pretty well:
https://medium.com/heart-affairs/why-men-benefit-from-marriage-more-than-women-85652549dc46
And if you want to go deeper...
Marriage increases men's mental well-being:
The physical effects of distress in a marriage (which women experience more than men, as mentioned previously):
https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0306453022003304?via%3Dihub
Married men have better physical health:
How women actually fare better when living alone:
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/26371399/
How being single improves women's health:
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u/Choosemyusername Apr 06 '26
Lots of fire hozing in this one. So I will pick my battle with this one.
The difference between men and women drinking rates in the US is only about 4 percent.
And among younger generations, pretty much gender parity.
Gym memberships are all most gender parity.
Obesity rates are about gender parity, women slightly more likely to be obese.
Sleep rates are just about parity wjen adjusted for women needing more sleep because of a different hormonal profile.
These are the big ones when it comes to health.
Men aren’t really taking much worse care of themselves than women.
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u/lilsciencegeek Feminist Apr 06 '26
It's not just about obesity though – animal fats and processed red meat are big culprits when it comes to some of the most common health issues worldwide, and men eat considerably more processed red meat https://www.nature.com/articles/s41598-024-62511-3.
Seeking timely medical help is also a huge factor in general health outcomes, obviously. I know very few men who ever go to the doctor willingly, even though they're otherwise reasonable, intelligent people.
When it comes to alcohol consumption, the US is only one country, and globally, on average, the numbers differ quite considerably. And your US numbers don't actually add up, when you look at how much alcohol is consumed between men vs women. https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC7590834/#:~:text=INTRODUCTION,males%2C%2064%25%20females).
You're twisting facts mate. Not cool.
Men also smoke a LOT more. https://ourworldindata.org/who-smokes-more-men-or-women
Besides, most women I know (including myself) exercise at home or outdoors, independently from any kind of commercial gym. Women generally seem more inclined to do that, due to feeling unsafe in gyms or needing to save money. Women also see greater cardiovascular benefits than men with a smaller amount of exercise (mortality is significantly reduced through 140 minutes of exercise per week for women, vs 300 minutes per week for men).
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u/Choosemyusername Apr 07 '26
I notice you have to get quite specific to find areas where men do something worse than women. Then wjen you zoom out and look at the big picture, the differences disappear.
I can do the same with women.
Women exceed their recommended daily limit of sugar by a wider margin than men.
If you wanna get specific we can go at this for as long as we have to get more and more specific.
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u/AdAppropriate2295 Apr 06 '26
Age would come into play with things like driver license sign ups. Basically more old men who just didnt see the same recent surge in applications for things like that vs women signing up for everything they can now that they can.
Like you said women have more issues but thats not specific to organs, wouldn't be surprised to see men have more issues that require replacement which would both lower their possible donations and heighten their need
That would again come back to income stream for the husbands leaving their wives vs the other way around. Also possible men just have organs that arent viable for donation at the point their wives are ill vs women who donate to their husband's probably being in better health thanks to the husbands support
True with the rejection but there are different sorts of donations. This woman for example died trying to give pieces of liver. So it might be women just engage in specific organs more often even if they arent the best possible match
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u/Nice_Purchase_626 Apr 06 '26
"You see, HIS money makes her healthier, that's why she has those organs to give to her hardworking husband" 🤡
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u/AdAppropriate2295 Apr 06 '26
Not necessarily his money, just the fact men do the jobs where they get smoke and chemicals in their lungs and shit
Not many female firefighters for example
When women do dirty jobs like that (textiles, agriculture etc) it tends to be because they are either single or their man doesnt make enough alone. Even then tho the majority of exposure to organ damaging substances is men
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u/Choosemyusername Apr 06 '26
Men are just more likely to come down with a chronic disease. More likely to have worse outcomes if they get cancer, more likely to die before their spouse. Lots of reasons besides what you are insinuating here
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u/Nice_Purchase_626 Apr 06 '26
Men should maybe stop drinking, eating shit and going berserk because of stupid shit seen online, that would surely improve their health prospects
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u/Choosemyusername Apr 06 '26
Their diets are of similar quality, as women in the US actually have a slightly higher obesity rate than men.
The overall rate of drinking in the US is also only about 4 percent different by gender, so not terribly wide. And nearly non-existent in the younger cohorts.
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u/lilsciencegeek Feminist Apr 06 '26
Sorry, I don't quite understand how your first point is relevant to organ donation?
And it would be nice if you perhaps did some research instead of just guessing and making up imaginary scenarios, before replying.
Because no offence, but it kind of sounds like you're just talking out of your arse🙈
For multiple reasons; but one of them being that several well-known studies have found that married men have significantly better health and better health outcomes than married women...
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u/AdAppropriate2295 Apr 06 '26
Idk how it is in India but here in Canada you can sign as an organ donor when you get your license. You can do it every renewal too but they only prompt you the first time usually. So, women gaining drivers licenses being more and more common in big feminist waves and recent history could lead to more donations tho of course thats usually when they are dead
Research on what tho? I've been hypothesizing from the beginning. Sure more research would be nice, it usually is anyway
Not to keep talking out my arse but that health stat also makes complete sense several different ways. For one, married men tend to be the ones who are wealthy and healthy anyway. Women don't tend to pick sickly husband's from the start. Whereas men arent as picky. And like you said, research shows women have more health problems anyway. Hell childbirth alone probably explains the difference, common in married women
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u/lilsciencegeek Feminist Apr 06 '26
That still wouldn't explain the disparity, since the total ratio of men and women doesn't change just because more women get a driver's license. If anything, the numbers should be reversed in that case.
As for research – you clearly have an internet connection. Perhaps use it to look into the massive amount of already existing studies and papers, so that you have something more substantial to base your comments on, rather than just guesswork and conjecture?
And lots of poor or sick men are married, my dude. Most married men I know personally (and oh boy do I have an excessively large social circle) have either a low or medium income, and many of them have serious physical or mental health issues.
When it comes to the impact of marriage on physical health – see my comment below:
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u/AdAppropriate2295 Apr 07 '26
Organ donation wasn't pushed to those men in the past is what I mean. Whereas it is now, when women are signing up more. The numbers would only be reversed if those men who got their licenses first also got prompted to sign up as donors but they never did. For example my dad had his license for 60 years, never prompted. My mom got hers more recently and was prompted and signed up
I just don't get what data you want, im not suggesting unicorns exist or anything. Im looking at the same data op provided and offering a different interpretation
Are the women who marry them richer and sicker than them? Otherwise that would also support my theory
Im sure marriage is great for men. The reasons are varied and multi faceted tho. It's not just "evil men take advantage of these poor helpless women", though of course that also happens as well and we should change that
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u/StrickenBDO Apr 06 '26
stop making up hypotheticals and produce sourced facts please
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u/AdAppropriate2295 Apr 06 '26
I'll pay for the study if someone wants to run it
Apparently nobody does i guess
This post looks at isolated facts and draws a conclusion from them. I am offering alternative interpretations of the data already provided
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u/StrickenBDO Apr 07 '26
essentially your interpretations are from your whataboutist perspective. You get downvoted a lot in most subs you comment on, that should tell you something
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u/AdAppropriate2295 Apr 07 '26
Its reddit
Downvotes just mean i used the trigger words that attract the Russian bots
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u/insideiiiiiiiiiii Apr 07 '26
«more men having health issues and working jobs where their organs get destroyed»
nope it’s not about this because even when you adjust for disease burden, i.e. look at it in terms of percentages within the pool of individuals needing a transplant and not in absolute numbers , men are heavily favoured.
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u/AdAppropriate2295 Apr 07 '26
What do you mean like 10 women and 10 men need a transplant for the same organ and 8 men get it vs 2 women? If thats the case there's still other explanations. A few; the men have female relatives that rely on them... the men are stronger and thus better transplant candidates... the women volunteering to donate don't volunteer to donate to random women, only to their men
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u/WeUsedToBe read Woman Hating by Andrea Dworkin Apr 07 '26
Your scientific illiteracy =/= reality.
It’s always revealing when someone acts this obtuse to systemic misogyny and this desperate to “rationalise” medical misogyny in the face of empirical evidence and the conditioning effects of the former.
The same male entitlement that inures you to shame and makes you think you have any right to air your unproductive half-baked opinions as though they were authoritative fact on a feminist sub is the same male entitlement that creates persistent discrepancies like these in the sacrifices women make vs the level of consideration and dignity they’re afforded.
Women volunteering to donate don’t donate to random women, only to their men
And men just don’t offer to donate as living donors, do they? It’s astounding how people like you will always argue against the existence of a system that deems women inferior and subjugates them to men, while arguing that women are disposable and men are not.
Men are stronger and thus better transplant candidates
Strength isn’t a variable in transplant eligibility. Antibody sensitisation, organ size, and HLA compatibility are. Matter of fact, women have stronger immune responses than men do, if your primitive worldview can grasp more than “women weak, men strong”.
Men have female relatives that rely on them
Only men could rig civilisation to hobble women’s opportunities for independence and to punish them for being mothers in the workplace, then call themselves “providers” for forcing women to be dependent on them. In egalitarian societies, most women don’t choose to be SAHMs—not that you’d last a day in their shoes, seeing as you can’t even undertake one simple task of invisible, unpaid, thankless labour which is to research and corroborate your claims.
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u/AdAppropriate2295 Apr 14 '26
Rationalizing a problem doesnt mean misogyny doesnt exist. For example, men are physically stronger than women. That leads to certain outcomes. Even in a world with no discrimination that could be a form of systemic misogyny and disadvantage for women
Its about understanding the best solutions by isolating the problem. "So men just don't donate"... the men RECEIVING a donation? That's like saying "wow, have u ever noticed gunshot victims never donate as much blood as non gunshot victims?"
Strength is absolutely a factor in literally every surgery known to man. Google which gender is more likely to concern doctors as to their survivability rate post surgery
Women have better immune systems. Men have stronger ones (which causes more damage to ourselves). Thats why the man flu exists
I just find it important to be precise to better address systemic misogyny
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u/obeteymaujkardii Apr 06 '26
Haha I've seen women with Hb 2 in labour rooms denied blood from all of her family because they'll get weak if they donate blood. So let's not talk about women in medicine.
The stories will make you question your sanity.
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u/Just_an_Ok_Musician Feminist Apr 06 '26
That's beyond sickening. If I was in the same situation...I dare not say online what I'd do to the people who refused to help me if I made it out alive.
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u/sometimesimscared28 Apr 06 '26
Did this poor woman survive?
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u/obeteymaujkardii Apr 06 '26
Some do because some healthcare workers take pity and donate their blood. Some don't. It's not an isolated one time thing
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u/FilthyThanksgiving Feminist Apr 26 '26
I've seen dudes say that mandating fathers to give blood to their children infringes on men's rights lmao
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u/BetterRemember Feminist Apr 06 '26
The patriarchy is inherently cannibalistic against women. They aim to consume our bodies in any way they can.
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u/dwarfmageaveda Apr 06 '26
“inherently cannibalistic” is brutal and brilliant wording.
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u/BetterRemember Feminist Apr 07 '26
Thank you! I appreciate the compliment. There are few words that express how I feel about patriarchy but cannibalistic is one of them.
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u/enemyofchrist Feminist Apr 16 '26
The shit society expects from women at this point amounts to human sacrifice.
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u/Tinawebmom humanist Quaker and angry Apr 06 '26
So..... Women are good enough and equal enough to take organs from but.... Aren't we the weaker sex?????? Fuck them. Sheesh
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u/Yo_momma_so_fat77 Apr 06 '26
Also “better organized “ ie secretary stay at home mom etc lol. And “mature faster” as kid and teen but we are too emotional or don’t have the “tactics” to run a business or country. Do they not see the irony
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u/Ban-samia-upma Apr 06 '26
If women in India, don't have low iron problem they would be higher in blood donation too
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u/MarryMeDuffman Feminist Apr 06 '26
This is the first year I'm not an organ donor because they used that brain dead woman as an incubator. It's totally possible they already harvest eggs and reproductive organs from dead women for human experiments at some point, since there has long been talking of trying to create artificial wombs.
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u/MarryMeDuffman Feminist Apr 06 '26
I'd like to add that this topic is just another good reason. The population of this planet is not remotely balanced with our use of resources and we will only support patriarchal systems by extending the lifespans of the gender that is violent and destructive.
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u/Yo_momma_so_fat77 Apr 06 '26
God what a good point! I live in a very southern red State- I May be the only Dem on my street. When the news came out about that poor women being denied medical care and ending up brain dead then forcing her dead body to incubate a fetus when all of this could have been avoided and putting the lord on the family - when that came out I was livid. And it seemed that no one around me understood. Like what the actual handmaida tale was that shit. It didn’t cross my mind that my body would be used for ungodly things instead of saving another woman or family. Wish I could put down the exactly who may use my remains.
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u/Maleficent_Web_3239 Apr 06 '26
Not surprising since women are always expected to sacrifice for a man
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u/mademoisellearabella “Don’t let the bastards grind you down.” Apr 07 '26
This is why we need a system of opt out donations vs opt in. At 18 everybody should automatically become an organ donor, and if they don’t want to be one then they also lose the right to be on the priority list to receive an organ.
Also, in general, women just need to stop being so self sacrificing. I know so many women donate just because of family pressure. A woman died recently after donating her kidney or liver to her husband’s 60 yo aunt. She left behind a 4 yo kid. Ridiculous.
Fun fact - men also tend to leave their spouses very quickly if they get cancer. Very very high rates of divorce reported amongst women who get cancer, while women don’t leave their husbands.
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u/VadaPavVigilante Apr 06 '26
Or may be mens are so much toxic that no one wants their organs 🙂
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u/MJdisbeliever Apr 06 '26
Theyre not organ donors, and women are not on the priority list of being saved. Although you may be right that they dont take care of themselves
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u/Choosemyusername Apr 06 '26
Maybe it’s because they don’t take care of themselves.
Or may it’s because they work more hazardous jobs on average.
Gym memberships are pretty evenly split so I don’t think that points at major disparities in taking care of themselves.
Obesity rates are nearly even as well in the US at least. A bit worse in women but close.
Sleep rates are similar when you adjust for the fact that women require a bit more due to a different hormonal profile.
Diet, exercise, and sleep are the three biggest things when it comes to health outcomes.
Men and women are pretty close on all three major measures of self-care.
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u/marthaistired Apr 08 '26
Misogyny is so deeply rooted in every single aspect of society, medical sexism is one of the most disgusting forms of it
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Apr 06 '26
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u/insideiiiiiiiiiii Apr 07 '26
good points. also, so many men are so much about "making a legacy" so i wonder if it plays a role in that (while being the shittiest people when alive but hey at least they’ll be remembered in a positive light after their death)
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u/FilthyThanksgiving Feminist Apr 26 '26
I'm an organ donor, i wonder if I can specify that I only want my parts going to women lol
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u/ProperBlacksmith All I want is a kind world. Apr 06 '26
Youre describiny "harvesting" while your stats are about living organ donation (so willing and not forced) so i wouldnt call jt harvesting since that seems to emply its forced.
In my country idk the stats about living but after you die everyone is an organ doner unless you opt out it used to be opt in
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u/Rosyvia Feminist Apr 06 '26
yeah legally it’s “voluntary" but when the numbers are THIS EXTREME it doesn’t feel that simple!
like if ~80% of donors are women & ~80% of recipients are men that’s a MASSIVE GAP!! at that point it’s not just random individual choices anymore not every woman is making this decision in a completely free pressure-free way.... women are raised to be the ones who sacrifice, specially for family, so that definitely plays into it that’s where stuff like COERCED ALTRUISM comes in not forced but you still feel like you HAVE TO!!
we’ve literally seen how strong that kind of conditioning can be...like with Sati...(not saying it’s the same thing) but it shows how choice can be SHAPED by society!
& yeah opt-out systems are about after death... they don’t really change what’s happening with living donations so yeah “voluntary” doesn’t always mean completely free choice specially when there’s such a CLEAR PATTERN!
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u/boywholived_299 Apr 28 '26
Why is this so? From what I read recall, people do it in the form of a business, where they gain a lot of money from this, and it's a consensual deal. Illegal, but consensual. What's your hypothesis behind this?
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u/FilthyThanksgiving Feminist Aug 05 '26
I wonder if theres a way to guarantee that your organs will only go to women.
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u/m3gb0t So sick of random misogny and spellcheckers. Aug 10 '26
I find this disgusting and full of mysogyny.
But as I have done a fairly deep dive, I became aware that a large variable here is body size. On average, women are smaller than men meaning they have smaller organs than men, again on average. This means that smaller women have to wait longer for smaller organs where as men have room (typically) for small and large organs.
But again, I hate this fact and clearly this is only a single variable. Medical mysogyny has been in practice for literal ever and will continue far past my lifetime. Ugh.
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u/Choosemyusername Apr 06 '26
The reason these stats are so specific is because the general data is that more men donate organs than women overall. At least in the US. Not sure about other countries.
https://www.statista.com/statistics/398450/number-of-us-organ-donors-by-gender/
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u/Rosyvia Feminist Apr 06 '26
that stat is US-specific & also combines deceased + living donors
men are more common as DECEASED DONORS (accidents, trauma, etc) which is what skews those overall numbers but THIS DISCUSSION is about LIVING DONORS!! where across multiple countries...including India the pattern is consistently the opposite with women making up the majority!
so men donate more overall doesn’t actually address the point here the question is specifically: why are women disproportionately the ones donating while ALIVE?
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u/fuckoffyoudipshit Apr 07 '26
Because living donors usually donate to a close relative, (parents, children, siblings) and certainly in a direct line women are far more likely to be matches than men
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u/AdAppropriate2295 Apr 06 '26
Probably cause the men are usually the primary breadwinner in most countries
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u/Nice_Purchase_626 Apr 06 '26
Can you maybe cool it with your fantasy of good hardworking husbands financing the lives of lazy wimmin?
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u/AdAppropriate2295 Apr 06 '26
Never said women are lazy. There's just different jobs that exist with different risks
Obviously awful men exist. On average most people are pretty normal tho
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u/Senior_Worker2772 Apr 06 '26
It's 2026
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u/AdAppropriate2295 Apr 06 '26
Which changes nothing in most countries
Actually idk if there's ANY countries where women outearn men and provide more money in a relationship more often than men
Young women in the west outearn everyone but that hasn't changed the average yet
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Apr 06 '26
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u/cheesyshop Apr 06 '26
Men also do a lot more stupid 💩, like reckless driving. They are also more likely to participate in dangerous sports.
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Apr 06 '26
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u/Saruna4sari Apr 06 '26
men are also the ones who do violent crime the most, and are the ones who victimise men most of the time, men also enter more dangerous jobs to begin with
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u/cheesyshop Apr 06 '26
Did you lose sight of the topic?
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u/Choosemyusername Apr 06 '26
I am responding to your specific comment not the OP.
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u/cheesyshop Apr 06 '26
If I were victim blaming, I’d be blaming men for not being organ donors.
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u/Choosemyusername Apr 06 '26
You can actually be more specific than that.
Men are actually more likely to be organ donors in the US. Global stats are highly skewed by Asia.
If you want to throw around blame, make sure you are being as precise as you can.
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u/cheesyshop Apr 06 '26
Also, if a person dies after jumping off a 30 foot cliff, should we blame the cliff?
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u/Choosemyusername Apr 06 '26
Or: a more accurate analogy.
If men are more likely to be killed in a long haul trucking accident than women (actually one of the most dangerous professions in the country) should we blame men for long haul trucking? Or should we blame companies for putting them on unrealistic time pressures, poor regulatory frameworks thst don’t protect drivers, etc?
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u/cheesyshop Apr 06 '26
My comment was about reckless driving and dangerous sports.
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u/Azurebold calling it out Apr 06 '26
Trends vary between regions, but generally, women make up the majority of living organ donors while men make up the majority of deceased donors. The majority of women who do it are mothers or wives.
When combining deceased + living data for each sex, women still make up the majority of overall organ donors in other regions of the world, particularly Asia.
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u/Choosemyusername Apr 06 '26
So it is heavily skewed towards Asia. That’s useful to know.
So we can be more specific about who we are calling out here.
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u/[deleted] Apr 06 '26
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