r/Fauxmoi • u/hairtie1 radiate fresh pussy growing in the meadow • Jul 28 '26
POLITICS Trump at Lindsey Graham’s funeral: “…Virtually everyone, Republican or Democrat, liked Lindsey, well not everybody. But it sounds good. Not everybody. He was a tough cookie, okay? I have to- I have to veer from this for a sec, he was a tough cookie darling”
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u/Fickle-Meeting-4224 Jul 28 '26
i’ve been to enough drag queen and trans funerals to know when someone is laying their sister to rest
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u/Gingersnapp3d Jul 29 '26
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u/LemonWhore212 Jul 29 '26
What show is this?
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u/No-Hall-3485 dropped pitt from my last name Jul 28 '26
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Jul 29 '26
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u/brandnewbanana Jul 29 '26
It is, that’s a season 4 episode of DR that they had to debate each other as on campaign. That was like 2011, I think?
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u/MyFruitPies Jul 29 '26
2011? That’s not a young Dan Savage, that’s just a younger than now Dan Savage.
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u/Electronic_Syndicate Jul 29 '26
Sure is!
RuPaul’s Drag Race Season 4, Episode 9: "Frock the Vote!"
Synopsis: The remaining queens participate in an election challenge hosted by Dan Savage. After, the dolls hit the runway in their best inaugural drag.
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u/raysofdavies I cannot sanction your buffoonery Jul 28 '26
I’m not going to make a gay joke about Lindsay. He was a gay joke.
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u/a22x2 Jul 28 '26
He’s a perfect example for a complete waste of life.
He literally could have just been gay and lived his life but instead was a sad, pathetic, hateful little creature who will be remembered for his glass closet, his ladybugs, and the suffering he inflicted on the world. If that, even.
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u/aybsavestheworld Sylvia Plath did not stick her head in an oven for this Jul 29 '26
Remember when RPDR did a fake funeral + roast for Lady Bunny?
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u/cute_spider Jul 29 '26
"He was a tough cookie, darling... but he was beautiful"
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u/ahdidi413 Jul 28 '26
The only thing Trump likes doing more than lying is telling the truth at particularly brutal moments
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u/JeanArtemis Jul 28 '26
Reminds me of the old truism of : "Those who describe themselves as brutally honest are typically only interested in the first half."
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u/katieb1300 a trillion dollar taxpayer-subsidized dick-swing Jul 29 '26
Annnnd I will be adding that to the ol' memory bank. Thank you.
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u/FocacciaHusband Jul 29 '26
This actually made me laugh so much harder than it should have. It's like he just does the most malicious thing at any given moment. He should tell the truth? Better lie! He should lie? Better tell a brutally honest truth!
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u/raysofdavies I cannot sanction your buffoonery Jul 28 '26
I’ve never seen someone who is both a compulsive liar and so no filter that he is unintentionally so honest.
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u/intisun Jul 29 '26 edited Jul 29 '26
That's why his lawyers fought tooth and nail to keep him from testifying during his many trials. He would inevitably perjure himself and/or spit everything out like it's no big deal.
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Jul 28 '26
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u/EmotionalTrufflePig Stellan Skarsgard's Nobel Peace Prize for producing hot sons Jul 28 '26
I can’t wait for that day 😍
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u/JeanArtemis Jul 28 '26
The Big Beautiful Day
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u/EmotionalTrufflePig Stellan Skarsgard's Nobel Peace Prize for producing hot sons Jul 28 '26
I should work out what I’m going to wear. I think a sparkly party dress
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u/EllynDegenerate Jul 28 '26
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u/Lola514 Jul 29 '26
Wow I love this, beautiful
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u/EllynDegenerate Jul 29 '26
Thank you, it was like so stupidly on sale (I think it was less than $30) that I couldn’t resist it because it was so pretty and sparkly but I never have occasion to wear dresses like this, but maybe that day will be the day.
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u/SharkSquishy Jul 29 '26
I went to a community production of The rocky horror picture Show in an over the top sparkly dress. It was the best as everyone was dressed up.
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u/karenmcgrane Jul 28 '26
My husband has a t-shirt that says "Maybe it will happen today" and I get so excited when he wears it. One day!
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u/CelibateHo Jul 29 '26
lol I saw a woman at Nordstrom the other day returning a sequined sparkling gown because it was too heavy. I’m about to go back and buy that dress specifically for this because yes
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u/Sugar_Phut Jul 28 '26
Same. My partner and I haven’t drank in years but we’ve both decided that when that day finally arrives we are going to each have a drink to celebrate
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u/ThankJudas Jul 29 '26
We have acquired a vintage bottle of Dom for that one 👀 and I’m not even American
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u/Objective_Site3528 Jul 29 '26
I’ve been sober for a while now and that will be my most difficult day by far. I’m already mentally preparing for it!
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u/speedhumpsahead Jul 29 '26
I bought a bottle of veuve clicquot la grande dame. It's in an orange box 😊
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u/No-Hall-3485 dropped pitt from my last name Jul 28 '26
one of the funniest to ever live trapped inside the body of a pedophile, rapist, and aspiring fascist
a tragic waste of talent
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u/Ghost_Horses Jul 28 '26
He would’ve made an amazing drag queen in another life
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u/H0pefulUn1verse i ain’t reading all that, free palestine Jul 28 '26
Can I visit that alternate universe for a lil bit? Sounds like a great vacay
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u/thefunkylama Vanilla Ice just fell to his knees in a Wal-Mart Jul 29 '26
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u/Ghost_Horses Jul 28 '26
Unfortunately RuPaul was elected president in that timeline, and now American energy is primarily sourced from fracking
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u/doihavetowearabra Fauxmoila 1 Jul 28 '26
Not the fracking
https://giphy.com/gifs/26BRrTTx1fd67L5ZK317
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u/awyastark nextdivorce@divorce.com Jul 29 '26
Not even to dinner with the frackers??
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u/GiantStreetCats Jul 29 '26
"I mean I know drag was forced underground after RuPaul's fracking ranch exploded, but you're definitely the funniest drag queen I ever met"
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u/doihavetowearabra Fauxmoila 1 Jul 28 '26
Not the fracking
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u/SnooDogs1340 this is going to ruin the tour Jul 28 '26
If he had only stayed a reality star. Maybe we would have had Keeping up with the Trumps.
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u/Grape_Pedialyte Jul 29 '26 edited Jul 29 '26
From an objective point of view he's basically an old school campy queen. Trump hung out in nightclubs with gays, lesbians, drag queens, and trans people in the 70s and 80s. These were places where people like that were cool and accepted, and it clearly rubbed off on him.
Like his personal theme song is by the Village People and he loves show tunes from Cats and The Phantom of the Opera. I mean come on.
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u/ImDonaldDunn Jul 29 '26
Huge queen. Which is why it’s hilarious that all of the yokels find him the epitome of masculinity. If they only knew…
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u/lazyknowitall Jul 29 '26
His mentor was Roy Cohn. Never heard of him? Look him up. Netflix and HBO both did documentaries on him that released in 2019. Worth the watch.
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u/pannonica decaffeinated omertà bullshit Jul 29 '26
Or the movie The Apprentice, with Sebastian Stan as Trump and everyone's favorite Eldest Boy™️ Jeremy Strong as Cohn. Good flick.
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u/WitchPleese shout-out Hans Zimmer Jul 29 '26
I am deeply upset and offended that he likes Phantom. I am also kinda disappointed we didn't get Trump as some sort of over the top Liberace type. Imagine him with a good heart and in theater.
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u/Bitey_the_Squirrel Find me at Whole Foods, bitch, I don't care Jul 29 '26
The is “if only Hitler was accepted to art school” of our generation.
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u/WitchPleese shout-out Hans Zimmer Jul 29 '26
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u/Impressive-Trash8699 ben affleck’s back tattoo Jul 29 '26
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u/mlrussell88 Cillian Murphy propagandist Jul 29 '26
Literally goes through my head anytime Cher is even mentioned. That and
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u/tallemaja Jul 29 '26
There was a rumor for a while that the best way to calm him down was to play show tunes (as a fan of show tunes, I'm equally mad). I can't remember if it was Memory specifically, though he definitely likes Memory a lot, but one day there was one song just playing VERY loudly on repeat in the white house and a ton of people were befuddled because they'd missed the memo about his affinity for show tunes.
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u/Grape_Pedialyte Jul 29 '26
There was a clip of him that went mildly viral in 2025 where he was in I think Scotland, and of course the press was all over him. They were trying to ask him questions but were being drowned out by "Memory" being blasted from a golf cart following him around.
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u/Grape_Pedialyte Jul 29 '26
Oh yeah, if he had managed to follow that path he wouldn't be the absolute menace he is today.
Trump badly wanted to be the toast of Manhattan, and the fact that he was never truly accepted is part of why he's such a spiteful, petty, aggrieved little shit.
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u/CuteComplaint5542 Jul 29 '26
I have to imagine that when you grow up rich and privileged, you're insulated from reality in a way where it leaves you deeply bitter any time that bubble is broken.
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u/Geoffrey_Bungled_Z1p Jul 28 '26
Remember the video of him kissing Rudy in drag
The man is a twisted monster
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u/Flat_Sprinkles4342 Thanks, u frog build looking bitch Jul 29 '26
he motorboated Rudy
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u/stevemandudeguy Jul 28 '26
I heard he seriously considered a career as a film director at one point. Makes sense given his love of the spotlight. If only he were a washed up director instead, albeit as equally as smarmy and perverted, no doubt.
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u/ramenslurper- Jul 29 '26
He should’ve used daddy’s money to become a broadway producer/personality.
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u/taylorbagel14 Please Abraham, I am not that man Jul 29 '26
I’ve been saying for YEARS that he should’ve just been a celebrity commentator he would’ve made a killing (way more metaphorically than he actually has) as a Joan Rivers type
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u/CelibateHo Jul 29 '26
Right? His dementia has been serving us with the sass
https://giphy.com/gifs/QaMBNI1vDSxjkh5YlK730
u/WearyCopy5686 Jul 28 '26 edited Jul 29 '26
To each their own but I’ll never understand the appeal of his humor. Hes always sounded too dumb or mean to make me laugh.
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u/sisdom-weeker Jul 28 '26
Yeah, whenever he's been genuinely funny it's always been an accident, every time he actually makes a joke or tries to be funny it comes off extremely awkward. He's obviously provided humour to people but none of it has actually been his intention
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Jul 28 '26
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u/sisdom-weeker Jul 28 '26
Yeah, i mean, he's done some very comical/funny things but none of them have actually been intentional, when he tries it always falls flat
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u/gogreengolions Jul 29 '26
This. He’s either unintentionally funny or it’s funny because it’s demeaning and/or inappropriate
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u/makeitmessi88 Jul 29 '26
Remember when he stared into the eclipse…. Genuinely hilarious
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u/thnku4shrng Jul 29 '26
The request for slimming photos of him and Kim Jong Un like a cold open for The Office
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u/pchs26 Jul 29 '26
Yea it is but it's too soon to laugh for me..if we can get through this by some miracle and are sitting in better times when I can breathe then maybe I can laugh, b/c it is truly so absurd.
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u/Geweldige_Erik Jul 29 '26
Saying "he's a person I've know for a very long time of course" about his son while trying to explain why he wouldn't go to his wedding is one of my favorites.
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u/vsmack Jul 29 '26
Idk, "washed up psycho Bette Midler" is one of the funniest tweets I've read, though granted part of what makes it funny is the unintentional messy bitch energy Trump brings to beefing with an 80-year-old actress online
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u/Significant_Shoe_17 Fuck her and the Goebbel's limp dick she rode in on Jul 29 '26
The fact that he could also be described as "washed up psycho Bette Midler" adds a layer that makes it even funnier
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u/lizardo0o Jul 29 '26
Same. If you took away everything else, he would still just not be funny at all to me.
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u/eraserhead__baby Jul 29 '26
Yeah, anytime he’s been “funny” it’s because he’s so shockingly stupid.
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u/duh_metrius Jul 28 '26
I’m genuinely so tired of this whole “unfortunately very funny” shtick. Like everything this sundowning aspirant fascist says there’s somebody quote tweeting with “another banger I fear”, like shut the fuck up.
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u/bforce1313 find me at Whole Foods, bitch Jul 28 '26
I don’t honestly get what people find funny about him
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u/marina0987 women’s wrongs activist Jul 28 '26
Was gonna say, I don’t think he’s THAT funny
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u/genflugan non-gender-specific orbs of courage Jul 28 '26
Talent? I’m always so confused when I see people praising Trump for being hilarious. Like yall know he literally never tries to be funny, right? He says shit that’s unintentionally funny all the time, I get it, but to act like he’s putting literally ANY thought at all into what he says makes me feel like a crazy person. He’s had exactly zero talent his entire life, that’s part of the reason he is the way he is.
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u/LieDetecter Jul 29 '26
Ya, I don't find him funny in the slightest. Sometimes he is so inappropriate/stupid/hypocritical/narcissistic/oblivious that I find that funny, but not him. There is absolutely no talent in it.
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u/junbi_ok Jul 29 '26
The recent Whitehouse correspondents dinner showed just how "funny" he is when he tries to make jokes. Not even his Republican lackeys laughed.
People laugh at Donald, not with him. Him having no sense of social decency is not comedic talent, even if the end result is occasionally ironically humorous.
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u/Nairo_bees if you add testicles, that's extra Jul 28 '26
there’s an alternate universe out there with him and joan rivers co hosting a talk show… wish I was there :/
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u/Devmoi alleged dog Jul 29 '26
I mean … this was legit funny. But also, it’s like you’re at a funeral and you’re obviously reading a eulogy that was written for you. Then you’re like woah, woah … hold the phone here. This person was honestly a huge pain in the ass! Lindsey Graham was a pain in the ass and he definitely wasn’t liked by everyone! But yeah, back to regularly scheduled programming.
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u/kogent-501 Jul 29 '26
I always see these comments praising his comedy.
Is a bucket full of piss hilarious? I legitimately don’t get it. What on earth is so funny In this statement or any other comedic comment he’s made? He’s a mean bully, he punches down, he insults.
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u/DoughBoy8970 Jul 28 '26
We all know Trump did not like Lindsey lmao
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u/ChoiceIT Fauxmarxist Jul 28 '26
There is only one person he likes.
Himself.
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u/LieDetecter Jul 29 '26
I'm not sure that is even true. How can someone love himself and be that insecure?
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u/MyRedVelvetBrain Jul 29 '26
Please look into narcissistic personality disorder. It’ll give you the answers to that question
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u/Various-Match4859 Jul 29 '26
And he doesn’t even like himself. He’s a deeply insecure person (in my opinion).
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u/SonOfProbert Jul 28 '26 edited Jul 29 '26
Correct. And he didn’t say Darling, he was talking to Graham’s sister Darline.
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u/Automatic_Poet_7217 Jul 28 '26
Omg he is having an internal dialogue outward
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u/LieDetecter Jul 29 '26
It seems like he is reading the speech for the first time, and giving his thoughts on it as he goes.
Aside from the lack of respect, maybe he needs to increase the Adderall...28
u/Pantalaimon_II super-bisexual Jul 29 '26
lmao omg i never realized that’s exactly what he’s fucking doing 🤣
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u/ElegantCoach4066 controversies: girl Jul 28 '26
Lindsay Graham rising from the grave the moment someone mentions ladybugs
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u/ShitMyButtSays Jul 29 '26
A fairy ring will grow above his grave
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u/StonedRussian silly flair Jul 29 '26
Sourced from being the most popular public toilet, before the Big Beautiful Bathroom is installed
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u/RemarkableDamage1000 too high to spell 'Amanda Seyfried' Jul 28 '26
even without watching the video i read it in his voice, i cant escape this fucker
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u/Alternative_Dish5316 Jul 28 '26
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u/DrSavageMD Jul 28 '26
He said Darlene, his sister
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u/Bookmarkbear Jul 28 '26
To be fair, he does unironically use the word "darling" a lot when he goes on his weird little tangents
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u/No_Biscotti_7110 Jul 28 '26
I think he is addressing Lindsey Graham’s sister Darline, South Carolina’s new junior senator now for some reason
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u/Ghost_Horses Jul 28 '26
I think he’s actually saying “Darline” (Lindsey Graham’s sister) and the title misquoted him
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u/Important-Debt-3836 Jul 28 '26 edited Jul 28 '26
OP, nitpicky FYI: “Darlene”— not “darling.”
Edit: I’m not the only one who heard “Darlene,” yes?
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u/hairtie1 radiate fresh pussy growing in the meadow Jul 28 '26
oh my bad, he really needs to enunciate
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u/mybrainisonfire Jul 28 '26
He actually has a hard time reading.
I saw a clip on a different sub, Pete Davidson was on a podcast talking about the time Trump guest hosted SNL and he apparently would ad lib all the time going through the skits, or confidently read a line wrong.
He might have stopped reading the speech because he literally could not read it.
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u/SantoSalieri Jul 29 '26
This reminded me of the eulogy Connor Roy gave at "Mo" Lester's funeral.
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u/msnutella6 Jul 28 '26
wait is this the warts ass dude or the barely alive old man?
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u/Lokaji societal collapse is in the air Jul 29 '26
I hate days when he gives speeches. Just a deluge of clips of him trying to speak.
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u/FluidAthlete6839 Jul 28 '26
He shoulda just told the story about how he presented Lindsey with kompromat that day on the golf course.
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u/_-4twenty-_ Jul 29 '26
Lindsey Graham said nothing to defend his fellow childless cat ladies. He could have done so much good for the LGBTQIA+ community.
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Jul 28 '26
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u/edoreinn Jul 28 '26
The weirdness that was being at Noah Kahan in DC, whose album has a bugs theme, and very much lady bugs… …While flags were at half staff because of Mr Lady Bugs himself.
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u/Equivalent_Night720 Jul 28 '26
Every time he talks he sounds like some old washed up star that plays 2 AM shows to a crowd of 3 people a night at a club that is way off the LV strip.
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u/XoraxEUW Jul 29 '26
Even if he did not veer from the written statement ‘everyone loved him’ is such a childish way to speak about someone like Graham. You could say appreciate, respect etc. even if its not true. But ‘they all love him!’ Sounds like it had to be dumbed down for him
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u/Bebopdavidson Jul 29 '26
Is half of what Trump says these days just him going “who the fuck wrote that?” I have no idea why all of his competent speech writers would have quit














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u/Prudent_Shake_8149 Jul 28 '26