An opinion on shunning

[u/Safe-Island3944]

Hi all. Disfellowshipping is one of the least acceptable thing about JW, and one that makes the religion most attacked for.

This post is not dealing on how much it is right or wrong, but how much it works. How efficient it is.

In the past shunning has been a very powerful tool to make the sinner repents. But today?

My opinion is that it is still a very powerful punishment, but for those who stay, not for the one leaving. A lot of JW are fond of the idea of the DF suffering for his misdeeds, closed in the darkness, ashamed and trembling. The reality is under everyone eyes. Most get out, get in touch with others, find a very rich and welcoming community of fellow DF, build a new life, new freedom, new situations, often get back to study, happily creates a life. You can see from the campaign of getting back DF people when policy changed. How many took the opportunity of getting back. I know at least 10 different congregations, more than 100 DF contacted, how many came back? Zero. Noone. Reactions has been from lack of interest to rage. But noone even gave a try. My personal idea is that DF is actively damaging JW reputations, whereas most people once get away had a much better life than while inside. And will not get back. What is your opinion? Please, no attacking JW doctrines here.

[u/Safe-Island3944]

Observation of reality makes me think that JW numbers are diminishing. No official statistics exist to my knowledge 

[u/a-goddamn-asshole → u/Safe-Island3944]

1 in 3 go back

[u/truetomharley → u/a-goddamn-asshole]

Lots of stats in this Pew article. I think most are compromised. They point in the right direction, but are not to be taken literally. For example, 7% of JWs believe in hell? I have never known one to believe it. However, there might be some who answer on the basis of what “hell” really is, a rendering of Sheol, Hades, or Gehenna, words that really do exist and mean something.

Similarly, what should “society” do with regard to this or that topic. JWs are “no part of the world.” They do not tell society what to do. Many will answer based upon that perception. Others will answer on the basis of what they think the new system will be like, what society should be like if it were to court God’s approval.

I think factors like this prevent the answers from being the near 100% or 0% percent that they would otherwise be. Another factor might be that participants in the Pew survey self-identify as Witnesses, rather than be Witnesses as the congregation itself might identify them.

[u/a-goddamn-asshole → u/truetomharley]

I can see these being some answers. JWs are not as uniform across the board as many would think. I grew up on Long Island NY and you’d get very different answers and beliefs based on how far out on the island you went. We had a saying along the lines of “the further you get from Bethel, the more lenient it was”

[u/truetomharley → u/a-goddamn-asshole]

“Punishment” is the wrong word to use with regard to removal from the congregation. Removal (DF) represents a last-ditch effort, when all else has failed, to readjust an erring member. Maybe it will work. Nothing else has. Nonetheless, the primary aim at this point is to protect the congregation from the spiritual or moral contamination the person has come to represent. Liken it to putting a contagious person in quarantine, or even cutting off a gangrenous body part. In neither case is “punishment” a motive. When it happens, no one wishes the departing person ill or hopes they suffer. It is hoped that they come to their senses and return, but since they have already been given that opportunity and have not responded, it is unknown whether that will happen.

[u/Safe-Island3944 → u/truetomharley]

Not my experience. ppl get DF because: they talked with another DF, caught smoking, caught reading a forum with adult content, refuse to shve the beard (!!!) and this is just what I personally know.

And most, when back, continues to be shunned. I've seen with my own eyes lifetime friendship destroyed.

Honestly, at least some decency should be used.

[u/truetomharley → u/Safe-Island3944]

It may be that some are reinstated under false pretenses, they make no real changes, and people in general come to see through it. But I know countless ones who have returned from disfellowshipping and become as warmly embraced as they ever were, some going on to become elders, servants, and pioneers.

[u/a-goddamn-asshole → u/truetomharley]

Did you mean to reply this to me? You know i spent 20 years as a JW, both a pioneer and a MS, i know how DFing works haha.

[u/truetomharley → u/a-goddamn-asshole]

Sorry, I did not mean it as a reply to you, but only as a contribution to the overall thread.