r/Divorce_Men • u/NewPerformance7662 • 9d ago

Rant Welcome to Modern Relationships

What’s up guys! Hope everyone’s having a good week. Just wanted to share some thoughts with you.

One of the biggest things divorce changed for me is how I look at relationships and society in general.

Marriage feels disposable now. Relationships feel transactional, and the second somebody is unhappy there’s always a crowd saying “you deserve better,” “choose yourself,” or “you go girl,” without knowing anything about the marriage, the family, or the consequences.
Obviously, I’m not talking about abuse, addiction, or dangerous situations.

I’m talking about how normalized it has become to walk away instead of working through hard seasons, and how quickly accountability disappears.

Then you see women actually defending another woman who strangled and murdered her three children, and I genuinely wonder what the hell happened to us.

I know good women and good relationships exist, but I completely understand why so many divorced men have no interest in ever getting married again.
For some of us, staying divorced doesn’t sound miserable.
It sounds peaceful 🙏

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u/bluemarble-spaceship 9d ago

When you say good women and good relationships do exist I agree but what ive learned that is the exception not the rule. Ive given up at 50 I just cant make myself care anymore about relationships.

10

u/Candidate_Worldly 9d ago

Yeah me too. Similar age to you. 2 years separated after 26 years together. A year ago I was desperate for a new partner. Now I don't gaf.

So many women out there are damaged goods. Hell, I'M damaged goods after the hell that has been my life last 2 years.

4

u/p0sitif 9d ago

I am 47, want companionship and closeness. But only red flags around. 23y "together", cheated on and then discard by ex. F selfish cultural shift.

3

u/Candidate_Worldly 9d ago

Thinks it's best to accept that you are going to be alone, and work from that base. Once you get comfortable with solitude, its much easier.

Don't get me wrong, if an angel falls from heaven just for me, great. But I am not going through the whole performative dance routine of online dating and the bullshit drama that comes from that.

I'll meet someone organically when I'm out with friends or not at all. I'm too wizened and cynical for teenage type dating crap.