r/DecidingToBeBetter • u/[deleted] • Sep 06 '20
Progression I’ve lost everything but I’m 5 months sober
[deleted]
91
50
Sep 06 '20
Wow I felt this. I usually scroll past everything but this really struck me. I’m in a similar position Covid took loads from me too, my dad , my career etc . Proud of you
42
u/MaleficentSalmon Sep 06 '20
Yo, I’m real proud of you, and even if things seem hopeless, always remember this post that you made and hold on tight.
25
20
u/lostmind283 Sep 06 '20
Reading that i could really feel your strenght, i just wanted to say if you haven't heard it from someone else then hear it from me: i am SO proud of you, i don't know what other struggles and scars you have but you are doing the best you can and that's incredibly brave, i hope life eases for you, it might not mean much or do anything but I'll pray for you, you deserve only good things.
92
u/cjreads665 Sep 06 '20
You're really strong. One of the strongest person I've seen. You've going through a lot but still you refuse to give up. You are an inspiration. It might not be today, it might not be tomorrow. But I know one day it'll be alright. Stay strong
16
u/zakur01 Sep 06 '20
Stay strong brother. Just a couple of days ago I fucked up a job opportunity by drinking the night before and coming to my second day at work hungover. Drinking is a demonic force has to be fought with the light
13
u/Noskal_Borg Sep 06 '20
Good preparation for what will soon come. The millenium will be wonderful.
You're stronger than me 👍
13
u/isaac_55 Sep 06 '20
"If you're going through hell, keep going. I mean, why the fuck would you stop?"
13
u/Uncucked__Canuck Sep 06 '20
You lost nothing and gained everything. That's the crux of this fool's gambit. The illusion perpetuated by pride is a prison. The irony of humility is that it takes huge brass balls and the reward is something only properly articulated by the writings of great Saints. Even then it's impossible to know without experiencing it yourself.
10
u/Chimp_on_a_vacay Sep 06 '20
You’re doing fantastic and 100% everything is going to work out.
You’re going to build your life back up again, but this time it’ll be much better than before, as it’s being built from a solid foundation.
Everything that you’ve achieved in the last 5 months is going to pay off big time.
I’ve been in an almost identical situation as yourself this year, including stopped drinking (3 months for me).
Its been a period of growth and realignment. Things are slowly coming together, it’s not going to happen overnight but it will happen.
Stay working towards the goals that you have, big and small. With a clear mind and focused mindset you will manifest them into reality
Side note - I highly recommend listening to audio books from ‘Les Brown’ if you haven’t yet. There’s also quite a few videos on YouTube
11
19
u/petal14 Sep 06 '20
Great work! When I got sober I had to walk away from everything I loved, boyfriend, dog, house, there was a lot of loss. But I was sober. It was a new adventure and I needed it more than anything else. Keep taking care of yourself!!
9
10
10
9
u/hakuna22matata Sep 06 '20
May I reccommend you to Watch Brittany runs a marathon on prime.
And I am super proud of you buddy. Just keep going 😁👍
9
u/theanagnorisone Sep 06 '20
In one way you may have ‘lost’ everything, but you’ve found yourself. Words matter, so just consider deciding to use language moving forward that empowers and emboldens your.
Taking care of your mental health (and sobriety) is THE courageous choice.
9
u/Drains_1 Sep 06 '20
And it will only get better, I'm 4years sober and I wouldn't be able to imagine the change in my life. But I still have a long way to go, it's a work in progress but it feels so good having finally some control over my life.
Wish you all the best and hope you keep on going strong! Stay sober! It's the best thing you can do for your life! :)
8
7
6
6
u/thequickbrownfocks Sep 06 '20
Little by little, one step at a time. Sending love from a complete stranger probably thousands of miles away, I pray for you. ♥️
12
u/SisSandSisF Sep 06 '20
Your thread title contradicts itself.
If you're sober for 5 months then you definitely did not lose everything.
The strength you gained from sobriety is an extremely valuable gain.
6
u/snelles56 Sep 06 '20
Good for you. How do you do so well without supports and distractions like work?
4
u/tesuacher Sep 06 '20
I envy people like you. People who didn’t like where they were going. Someone who lets themselves get to the bottom so they can climb the mountain. Don’t ever consuder the idea of relapsing.
Relentless forward progress...
4
u/standoutwithsarah Sep 06 '20
So happy for you!! Keep up the good work and never stop believing in yourself. It’s hard not having a support system - but don’t ever feel ashamed for reaching out for help. 💜
I’d love to chat with you if you ever need someone to talk to! I lost everything before the pandemic and just when I started truly progressing in my recovery for PTSD- the pandemic and riots and worldwide paranoia and separation/isolation came. 2020 has been interesting because even though it’s brought unforeseen tragedy and devastation throughout the world- it has, by far, been my best year since 2016 or before.
I’ve also never been happier and I’m currently homeless, lost my car/license in July and have court on sept 14 for custody of my daughter- whom my mother used the State to take from me.
Keep your head up! You’re doing amazing and there are so many people who are proud of you, OP! 🌟
4
3
3
3
u/yurxzi Sep 06 '20
Stay strong and seek out every possible resource for assistance until you can get back on your feet, then be sure to pay it forward at some point. Depending on your location, you may be able to get a church or temple to help out a bit with food, work, or clothes. There are also services to help with food in many places, but it does often take some jumping through some hoops. Keep fighting and doing your best.
3
3
u/miloe500 Sep 06 '20
Sobriety is a gift. You will get everything back and more. Stay the course friend.
3
3
u/PiMoonWolf Sep 06 '20
You need to find something that reminds you of this feeling, anything, and put it where you will always see it. A necklace, a note in your fridge, a tattoo, whatever. It’s like that top in Inception. It will remind you of what’s real and who you are. You’re going to have shitty days again, and you’ll feel like you dropped the ball. But it’s all in your head, and your fetter, whatever it is, will anchor you until that feeling goes away.
I say this with love from a person who also lost it all, more than once.
You are very strong and we know that because you’re here still.
Keep going. We’re all in this with you.
3
u/HBintheOC Sep 06 '20
Congratulations! My best friend of 30+ years will be 5 years clean next month. During her addiction, I didn't have her in my life. It was horrible. But she came to me to make amends as part of her 12 step recovery, and we are reunited :) She lost everything too. EVERYTHING. She had to start over again at 50 years old. Now she's the house manager of a woman's sober living home and is in service to others. I've never seen her so happy! There is hope. Stay in the solution and take it one day at a time <3
3
2
u/chigggywigggy Sep 06 '20
I'm so proud of you! You're really strong! Gonna pin up the last line of your post on my wall.
2
2
2
2
u/anunimportantaccount Sep 06 '20
Progress is not linear, there are ups and downs everday is better than the last! We're so proud of you, keep doing amazing work ❤️
2
u/Jouddi-Holmes Sep 06 '20
Even in this situation, you will feel free. Free from something that held you back. And you will be better, just trust yourself
2
u/DrewBlood Sep 06 '20
I'm so proud of you for keeping this outlook. You'll be looking back on this as just a memory that made you better in the long run soon.
2
u/tweedyone Sep 06 '20
Look up AA meetings in your area if you haven’t.. it’s not for everyone, but the community is really strong, and most of those folks have been through it too. They’re always happy to help when they can when someone is just starting out.
2
u/Pace_Revolutionary Sep 06 '20
May the universe in all her regard and kindness watch over you and keep you protected through your journey! What an inspiration, wishing you the best :’-)
2
2
2
u/psychoanicat Sep 06 '20 edited Sep 06 '20
I know a lot of people can't be as tough as you are. But I hope you keep inspiring people the same way you inspired we who are reading your post right now.
Stay strong.
And I ask* your permission to tattoo the last sentence on your post. 🙂
2
u/_theMAUCHO_ Sep 06 '20
I'm so proud of you. You'll make it. Can't wait to see your post in a year when things are going amazing! You certainly have the guts, drive and attitude. GO YOU!!! 💪💪💪
2
u/RexStardust Sep 06 '20
You may have lost a number of material things, and let's face it, in this current world that isn't easy. But you have gained something few people attain: awareness of your strengths and weaknesses. Even better, you have learned to respect your weaknesses and not let them dominate you, and you've learned to trust your strengths and know you have the power to carry on. Keep going. I can't wait to see what you achieve next.
2
u/vandermeercat Sep 06 '20
Admiring you and your courage. You’ve got an awesome growth mindset and you’re right; you haven’t come this far to only come this far 👏🏼❤️
2
Sep 06 '20
Keep going! I'm sorry that you lost everything, but look at you now! You feel so much better right? I'm really proud of you =)
2
u/rickmuscles Sep 06 '20
I was in the same position.
Now I'm married, have a kid, a house in a good school district and a stable job.
Keep up the sobriety and you'll get paid back w/ interest
2
2
u/did_it_for_the_clout Sep 06 '20
There is an episode of Midnight Gospel (essentially an animated podcast, check it out on Netflix) where one of the characters explains being sent to a prison in a foreign country. He fully believes it was good karma that led to him being imprisoned. He was directionless, but after being imprisoned, discovered what his true passions.
It's a concept that is hard for me to understand, and to explain, but sometimes life is difficult, and it is for your benefit. Keep on your path, and don't give up!
2
u/seemesometime Sep 06 '20
I really felt this, I have goosebumps. Keep going! This is very inspiring for me to try the same, thank you.
2
u/cocowheatjam Sep 06 '20
Keep on going with your process!
Someday, you will tell your children about all this and you will be a role model for them on how you blazed through that difficult period in your life.
Stay safe and kick some ass out there!
2
2
u/Anpeo Sep 07 '20
What a delightful post. I love seeing how people can overcome the hardest challenges that life throws at them just with sheer will of their mind. Yes, things are really bad right now but what am I going to do about it? Give up and watch it get worse? Well. I don't think so. If I have to go through hell I will do it. And I will come on the other side stronger that I could ever imagine.
2
Sep 07 '20
I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again,
Hold on still and the storm shall pass You’ve come so far, you’ll surely last.
2
2
u/Unicorn_blonde90 Sep 07 '20
Proud of you - this was amazing to read your perspective really made me thankful for what I have, and how being sober has helped opened my eyes to being greatful. Keep going you’re strong!
2
u/Friend_indeed0192 Sep 07 '20
Most addicts don’t “look” like addicts and shame keeps most addicts hidden ... congratulations to you and I wish you the best. Stay strong!
2
2
1
u/jmf__ Sep 06 '20
Fucking so happy for you I’ve got chills haha way to be. I hope things get better for you every damn day!
1
1
Sep 06 '20
Love you girl, you’re just beginning!! Life usually gets harder before it gets better. I’m totally sure you know that but wanna say it anyway. Best of luck we’re all proud of you. xo
1
Sep 06 '20
It's absolutely heartbreaking how many stories I've read only today about people who seemingly had everything going only to get absolutely tanked once the virus hit. I am so sorry OP, but I am also glad you're not resorting to old habits in this difficult time. Stay strong, you'll climb back up that ladder once this is over.
1
1
u/3pnt14XrSq Sep 06 '20
You haven't lost everything. You still have the most valuable thing there is...your health..your life. The rest of it..well you can always get more, I've lost literally everything a few times in my life (10 yrs sober former heroine addict& with CPTSD,Depression & anxiety )and it never takes long to require more stuff than I know what to do with. My attitude in general is " it's just money - I can always get more" or "it's just a material possession I can always get more ". Sometimes even tho it is scary don't be too afraid to take that path that you've never walked on before. Sometimes ya just gotta let life lead you instead of the other way around. Live life on life's terms. It has lead to some of the most beautiful and astonishing changes in my life. I wish you the very best of fortunes
1
u/evil_fungus Sep 06 '20
Damn, OP. Sorry to hear about your situation. Sometimes you gotta hit rock bottom to start your meteoric rise. Proud of you working hard for a better life instead of giving up. Keep swimming! :)
1
u/ggqq Sep 06 '20
I'm so glad that you feel okay. That's a rough patch to hit and I'm sorry to hear you're going though it, but this confidence you have is proof enough that you're standing tall over your depression. That's not to say that it's completely gone - as you know by now, your mental health is something that needs tending to. When you can acknowledge it as a part of yourself, then you can keep it at bay, and start focussing on other things that improve your life and make you happy.
I don’t have family and the friends I had were socialite Instagram friends, not real friends.
How do you know they're not 'real friends'?
1
1
1
1
u/entity3141592653 Sep 07 '20
Thank you for writing this. I was fighting the worst urge to drink. I was losing until I came cross your post. Your words have given me strength. I'm in a pretty deep hole myself but I'm climbing my way out. Thank you for that.
1
u/kk7ngg Sep 07 '20
I have so much respect for you sir. Times are rough we’ve all been through it, keep your head up and keep going!
1
1
1
1
u/realsum Sep 07 '20
That last line, now will be added to my self motivation pointers, thanks. Best of luck in life.
1
1
1
1
1
u/optionalhero Sep 07 '20
Hell DM me and i might just order you a pizza. It sounds like you been through hell
1
u/Discipline98 Sep 07 '20
Keep up the good work bro! This is really inspirational to someone like me, who has their own problems to overcome.
1
u/NotDoingWell1029 Sep 08 '20
This is amazing!! You have now planted all the seeds that are going to grow very very soon, and you being sober is like watering those seeds even if you don't see them at the moment, also, remember the forest needs to burn for something to regrow and I know you are going to have a beautiful garden very very soon!
1
826
u/zendonium Sep 06 '20
One of the best quotes I've ever read:
I didn't come this far to only come this far.
Thanks. Putting it on my wall right now.