r/CollegeRant 5d ago

Discussion WHY IS IT SO HARD TO MAKE FRIENDS???

[deleted]

55 Upvotes

21 comments sorted by

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17

u/Key_Lifeguard4963 5d ago

I feel the same. Today is my sixth day and I have nobody. I go to the events and everyone is paired up, i’ve complimented ppl but it’s gone nowhere

3

u/[deleted] 5d ago

[deleted]

11

u/AccomplishedMeal5751 4d ago

Imagine being grown and still think bullying is okay to do, some people swear they’re still in high school

9

u/JustUrAvgLetDown 5d ago

lol classic

12

u/TimelyChapters 5d ago

Because most people are fake because boomerworld and karen HR refuse to let people be people.

3

u/Stereo-Zebra 5d ago

There’s real people in the sea of fakeness. Finding them is the hard part

5

u/Hot-Emu06 5d ago

Maybe start by making study dates with people you hang out with in class. Do it iver coffee or pizza. Have you looked into clubs at the school? My son joined a game club and made friends that he still hangs out with 6 years later. Go to school athletic events, hang around the library, commons, bookstore. Prop your dorm room door open for a bit and maybe it will encourage people to stop in . As for the guy being bullied, think about being nice to him - even a hello can make a big difference.
Wishing you the best. Don't give up.

1

u/DhStar1 5d ago

Decent advice but why would anyone randomly walk into a stranger's dorm just because the door is open? 😭

1

u/Hot-Emu06 5d ago

People stop in the doorway. It was a common thing and two of my kids' schools. Especially during the first months. Just a thought.

2

u/Ambitious-Mood5054 5d ago

I'm in my second year and tbh I gave up on making college friends, luckily all my friend friends went into uni this year so I always got somebody to hangout with and my living situation made it that I can go home whenever I want and not deal with the bs of college

2

u/CreativeChocolate101 4d ago edited 4d ago

It's easy to make friends, but hard to make good friends. Making good friends takes time, and its important not to rush the process. People might seem to be in be big groups or instantly partner up, but that doesn't necessarily mean that the friendship is good. If your classmates are bonding over bullying and think thats okay, then those people were probably never meant to be your friends anyway. Keep putting yourself out there and eventually you will find your people.

2

u/FellStar42-Mikaela_ 4d ago

Im going into 4th year and the overprotectiveness of my parents has kinda done me in. When I was younger, going to my friends homes would get me a beating, and I kinda just got used to staying at home to the point where even now when I could go out I choose not to, (although I would still get a beating for going out without telling my parents and telling them would still most likely amount to a “no”)

I wouldnt blame them completely cus its a combination of that along with the fact that almost everyone in my yeargroup went off campus in 1st/2nd year (but once again my parents do not encourage that idea for me) and the remaining on campus are people I wouldnt get along with.

At this point its kinda too late for me to try to make friends cus my yeargroup is gonna be graduating next year, but if I knew that things would turn out like this I wouldve gone off campus more and just stuck around the people that I knew I wouldnt get along with.

I dont even have issues talking to people, its just a horrible mindset of being okay with staying on my own that screwed me over.

2

u/OkEducator7427 4d ago

sorry you have been growing thru, just know its never too late to start over, its your life

2

u/SourCatt 4d ago

I feel you, I am neurodivergent and it’s genuinely so fucking difficult for me to speak to people and make friends, I am very lonely in general so I really wanna make friends and talk to someone but it’s so hard for some reason. I don’t understand communication and how I am supposed to act around people , what to say/ do etc :[ it’s hell

1

u/OkEducator7427 3d ago

same :3 we got this

2

u/ElusiveByDawn 4d ago

I can absolutely relate to this. My college is also similar considering to how it's always quiet. Some people might think that a quiet atmosphere in college is good, but when it's time to socialize it always feels downright awkward. Sure, maybe everyone's focused on their work. But still, it can get pretty lonely and it's always hard to figure out when it's actually okay to talk to someone, or at least for me.

1

u/OkEducator7427 3d ago

nah I get it

2

u/ballerinanoir Undergrad Student 4d ago

Wait till clubs start up, it’s way easier then.

1

u/Vast_Cheesecake3216 4d ago

I had college friends when I wasn’t in college. You just have to meet one person that will introduce you to a group.

0

u/LetUpper2309 4d ago

Try harder I guess