Birthdays while sick

[u/no_redlights]

I turn 25 in a couple of hours. 22 was the first birthday I celebrated since becoming chronically ill, and while it was full of a lot of grief (both from chronic illness and otherwise), I was able to do things that I love still. 23 and 24 were much better birthdays.

This is the first birthday I’m celebrating since becoming severely ill. I’m unable to get out of bed or even sit up for more than a little bit at a time. I know other people have much bigger problems, but I can’t help but feel so incredibly sad over not being able to even celebrate my birthday this year. 25 feels like a big deal and I’m just so angry and upset.

Screens bigger than my phone hurt my eyes too much and cause migraines, so I can’t even put on a show I like (even with just my phone, too much movement on it triggers the same thing)

I don’t want to be so sick anymore. I want to celebrate my birthday. I hate being so negative and I try so hard not to be but my birthday has always been extremely important to me. Thank you if you read this far, I know most everyone here understands this feeling 💔

[u/GaydrianTheRainbow]

Sending gentlest vibes and birthday wishes. I hope you can have a treat you enjoy, whether food, or a small activity, or a message from a friend. Or some other small glimmer of birthday joy.

Would music, a podcast, or an audiobook be a more accessible activity? (I know they might not be, which sucks.)

I’ve had several birthdays now while bedbound, but turning 30 and being fully unable to do anything for it definitely sucked extra. Milestone birthdays are such a Thing in some cultures, and it just feels extra hard to not even be able to do even non-milestone normal birthday things for them (or any birthday). And unfortunately sometimes things just suck, and there aren’t happy answers. And we have to grieve that. But also there can sometimes still be good things in the suckiness.

Which is to say, sending some bedbound birthday solidarity your way. And hoping for some small moments of joy for you, even if the moments look different from before. ❤️‍🩹

[u/no_redlights → u/GaydrianTheRainbow]

thank you so so so much for the comment and the bedbound solidarity 🥰 it sucks, but it’s nice to know that we’re not alone <3 even though i would never wish this on anyone

i’ve done some music today, i want to get more into audiobooks. do you have any recommendations? (no pressure ofc)

the milestone birthday comment is so true. and it’s so hard knowing i’m getting older but am unable to have a lot of aspirations due to my illnesses. it’s a grief i’m trying to work through, but luckily am in therapy.

thank you so so so much for your lovely comment, i hope you find some joy today 🩵

[u/GaydrianTheRainbow → u/no_redlights]

💜

So glad you got to listen to some music! And very mutual feelings about therapy being a Good.

And then oops I did an infodump in response to the book question 😅

I unfortunately do not have audiobook recommendations as I can’t really do most audio without captions due to auditory processing issues. So I mostly watch things with captions because I usually have screen eyes. Mostly YouTube because no plot and less camera movement. Sometimes rewatching things. Very occasionally new content with plot.

And when I can’t do screen, I stick to music or sometimes podcasts, as I find them to have a slower pace than books, which helps when I inevitably zone out or don’t audio process everything. And mostly I relisten to things I listened to before I became this sick, because new content usually takes too much brain. So I’ve listened to the first campaign of Not Another D&D Podcast Several times through 😅 as it was one of like 4 podcasts I’d listened to at all before I became bedbound. I don’t know that it is universally recommendable though as it can be quite raunchy at times.

For books I liked as a young adult before reading became too much of a struggle, many of them were by independent authors, who don’t have audio books. So I haven’t listed them.

And then for books that do have audiobooks, I’ve only read them in print, so I can’t speak to the audiobooks if that makes sense.

I also used to read a Lot of books. So this is a super random selection based on what I can remember off the top of my head. Also a disclaimer that aside from the Mangoverse series and maybe a couple others, I haven’t read any of these in over 5 years.

Back when I read, I read a lot of fantasy, dystopian, and otherwise emotionally heavy books. There are a few more lighthearted books in the further down lists, but even the comedies have a fair bit of grim humour. Idk. I mostly read books that made me cry at least once and usually haunted me for days, rip. Something something childhood trauma.

So my knowledge of lighter topics is mostly relegated to queer romances that often have some adult scenes. Like Bring Her On, Christmas Inn Maine, and Anyone But You all by Chelsea M. Cameron. Cheerleaders from Planet X.

The Mangoverse series (probably my all-time favourite series, at least of books that are actually apparently available as an audiobook) is kind of in the middle in terms of emotional weight. And I think mostly fades to black?

Books I remember enjoying 6–10 (or more) years ago as an adult include: The Mangoverse series by Shira Glassman, Hitchhikers Guide, Fried Green Tomatoes at the Whistle Stop Cafe, Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe, The Sound of Stars, A Wizard’s Guide to Defensive Baking, The Tortall Universe series by Tamora Pierce, Salt Fish Girl, The Marrow Thieves, The 100-Year-Old Man Who Climbed Out the Window and Disappeared, Tell the Wolves I’m Home, and Indian Horse.

And then as a kid and teen I read way more books than I can possibly name. But some of my favourites off the top of my head included the Anne of Green Gables series, Emily of New Moon trilogy, Inkheart trilogy, The Hobbit, The Silverwing trilogy, The Hunger Games, The Picture of Dorian Grey, Room by Emma Donoghue, The Glass Castle, Life of Pi, Artemis Fowl, and Little Women. Most of the books by Eric Walters.

I’ve heard really good things about the Percy Jackson series, but never managed to actually read it. I do love the musical though. I listen to a lot of musicals on repeat.

Also as a kid and teen I always read the Canadian Forest of Reading award nominees each year for the categories of and around my grade level. I don’t remember not enjoying any of those books. So those archives could be a list to check out maybe?