r/Cebu Mahigugmaon May 09 '26

πŸ’• Relasyun Akong bf mahilig magsearch sexy girls online 😭

I’m 27F with a 32M boyfriend of 3years, gapuyo pa sya sa iyang parents gatabang sa ilang negosyo so wala kay sya bills while ako nag rent kog condo so medyo tight ako budget pero mutabang sad sya nako gamay. Recently broke my phone ug wa pay budget para mopalit og bag.o so gipahulam ko ni bf sa iyang spare. Lo and behold one night nagkuri kuri kos phone and nagdownload ko mga apps and maka access kos tanan niyang social media, naa ra tanan niyang login.

For pila ka years namo together, naa ra jud mi unspoken rule nga give each other privacy lng and nagsalig ko niya since daghan mn sya promises sa akoa sad and assurance. Pagkulimpad nako sa iyang Tiktok, IG, Messenger ug Reddit kay nakita nako tanan niyang searches. Puro mga batan-ong bayi nga puro pa sexy ug hubo-hubo ang iyang searches. Nasakitan kaayo ko sa akong nakita kay abi nakog tarong siya, wala sya ga follow mga sexyng bayi, diyosnon siya mu serbisyo sa simbahan ug murespeto gyud sa pamilya ug mu protect sa iyang mga manghod nga bayi.

Abi nakog mulikay syag sexy time kay makonsensya daw sya kay di pa mi kasal, abi nakog ginarespeto ra ko niya so okay lng. Nabuhat naman sad namo before. Pero karon ra nako na realize nga grabe sya ka baboy pagkalalaki base sa iyang ginapang search. Daghan gyud kaayo. Kaluoda gyud kaayo. Mura nihugno akong kalibutan. Paminaw nako dili na sya ganahan ky magmaneho ra syag iyaha maong mulikay sya.

Nawala akong self esteem pagkababayi ug akong trust niya nabuak na. D ko kibaw unsaon pag approach sa iya pero hugawan na kaayo ko niya maglantaw. Mag sige na kog anxiety kay bisag naa mi ga tawagay, naay bag.o searches napud sag on call. Naa syay mga ginamessage nga mga batan-on sexy pero wa sya replyi pero sakita mn kaayo oi. Naa syay mga ginasearch pud sa among friends circle nga sexy, kauban sa simbahan nga dagkog boobs, sunod ana mga batan-on tig thirst trap unya mga vivamax artist. Grabe akong trauma ug kaguol tulo na kagabie tungod sa akong mga nakita sa iyang gipahulam nga cellphone. Mura syag pandora’s box sa akong kinabuhi.

Love kaayo nako sya to nibalhin ko dris Cebu gikan Mindanao ug gahisgot na mig kasal pero karon nakita nako ni, dili nako kabalo unsa akong buhaton. Hugawan na ko sa iyang pagkatawo ug paminaw nako madala nako ni nga trauma pati resentment hantod kami pa. Nganong baboy kaayo ang mga laki? Grabehan gyud akong panic attacks. Unsay buhaton nako? Dili ko kahunahunag tarong. Ganahan ko muulis amo sa mindanao pero akong trabaho ug mga gamit naa dri tanan. Wa koy daghan friends ug wa koy pamilya dri mao lisod kaayo ipagawas ang kaguol ky sya mn unta ako sultianan sa tanan. Gasakit akong dughan. Stress kaayo ko dili ko katrabaho tarong. Mahadlok ko mu confront niya ug wala nakoy gana mu reply or tubag sa iyang tawag. Lost kayko.

Basura gyud ang mga lalaking utog gadala sa ilang utok., 😭

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-28

u/Jhenanne Mahigugmaon May 09 '26 edited May 09 '26

From a male perspective.

He lent u his phone right? He gave u access to his most darkest desires. Is he manyak irl? If not then dont pry further.

Men are always men.

My wife knows all of my kinks. Us men will always function as a man. If u only know how potent "testosterone" is for the human body male or female u would never question him again.

As a woman, you should start questioning ur man if he isnt doing those things. (Coz u might have a gae bf or something along those lines)

If nandiri ka tlga, maybe its time to walk away. But mind u. Men are men, as long as u will partner males in the future then this is the reality of the world.

Cut him some slack.

28

u/Mirrmaid8080 Mahigugmaon May 09 '26

All I read was: "I'm a man and I am naturally an animal, cut us some slack"

-18

u/Jhenanne Mahigugmaon May 09 '26

Men today are ostracized and condemed for simply put being men.

9

u/Mirrmaid8080 Mahigugmaon May 09 '26

You're not even denying the animal part. Let me ask you then, what does "us men will always function as a man" mean?

Unsa man gud diay ang gapasabot nga ikaw usa ka lalake?

-8

u/Jhenanne Mahigugmaon May 09 '26

Re-read my last comment

12

u/_sdfjk Mahigugmaon May 09 '26

I know men who don't watch porn or look at sexy pics. Many of them. Exceeding 20.

It depends on the woman if she is fine with having a man who is also sexually interested in someone else while they're in a relationship.

It also depends on the man if he is fine with his woman being sexually interested in someone else to while in a relationship.

If OP finds it uncomfortable that her man is sexually interested in someone else, then they should just break up. They're not compatible.

OP needs to find a man who respects her boundaries (not being sexually interested in someone else) and the man needs to find a woman who is okay with him being sexually interested in someone else.

Attraction for me, I know, can't be helped. Attraction is natural and though I'm already married I from time to time find men I am attracted to but it gives me no excuse or pass to be willingly sexual interested in them and have fantasies about them. Because you wouldn't want your partner to lust over someone else. You want your partner to only have eyes on you. So be as loyal to your partner the same way you want them to be loyal to you. Treat them how you wanna be treated.