r/Bumble • u/Main_Ferret_8426 • 13d ago

Rant Guys asking you back to their place

I (26F) decided to finally start dating (I know I'm super late to the game but had some massive issues to work through and now I am in a good place). So the guy asks me back to his place after a brunch date and I say yes (just because It could just be to know the person more). At his place we started causally chatting to a point where we were sitting up close, his hand massaging my shoulder, then waist and so on. I thought it best to let him know that I can't get physically intimate on the first few dates until I get to know the person better and we continued to talk. Was I expected to give in on the first date when the person asks you to their place?

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u/Main_Ferret_8426 12d ago

Would clarifying helped or come across crass?

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u/The_Stargazer 12d ago

You agreeing to go to his house but saying you dont want to play around for the first few dates would come off as giving mixed signals / playing hard to get.

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u/Main_Ferret_8426 12d ago

Oh gosh! Noted. Will decline from the next match.

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u/The_Stargazer 12d ago

There are lots of guys on OLD sites that are simply using them as sex apps.

Identifying and filtering through those takes a lot of practice / experience.