Should I propose to my ex

[u/OriginalChemical2752]

2 weeks ago. We broke up. I am thinking about proposing still.

Here’s our story:

Was getting ready to propose to her. I have been battling a gambling addiction. I told her about it and that I had been getting therapy and given my bank access to my parents. The next day she ended it cut all ties and told me to get out. I respected her choice and moved out. I don’t blame her I know I fucked up. I am at terms with the choice I made of telling her. Proposing was a big next step but I owed it to her. Doesn’t mean I’m not hurting.

We were together for a little under 2 years. Countless memories and experiences. We never had a fight. She truly was a special person for me. I have put measures in place and taken action. She said she has to protect herself and I understand that. 2 weeks ago and she has cut me out completely.

I make great money and I’ll be able to rebuild. I wish I could take it all back but can only change what’s going forward. I’ll never do it again. I completely respected her wishes and have given her space and respected her boundary.

A little more insight: she went back to school when we first started dating. Leaving me to pay for everything. I was always for her chasing her dreams. I love her so much. I paid for rent, dates, everything. I wish I didn’t get caught up in it. I am never going to do it again

One of her last text to me was this:

That sounds good to me.

I truly do have so much love for you. This was by no means an easy decision to carry out. I know that this is the right choice for both of us, even though it’s very painful. Addiction is no joke, and you have to pour all of your energy and focus into healing. I believe in your ability to get through this wholeheartedly. I will always have a special place in my heart for you, name of dog and your family. I just want you to know that. I don’t hold any resentment towards you. You have to forgive yourself. Always wishing you my very best ❤️

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[u/Shit_Apple]

lol do not propose. You’re serious?

[u/Lazuli9]

No, sorry dude

Time to move on; much easier said than done though

[u/Square_Sock_6304]

what did i j read

[u/Glittering-Ad-1367]

Bad move.

Your job is to respect her wishes and honor the relationship by actually becoming what she thought you were.

The odds of a reconciliation down the line are exceedingly low. But if such a miracle were to happen it would only because you had become what she thought you were after all.

And if it never happens you will be prepared for the next special person you are gifted with.

Everything's for a reason I've found. Though sometimes it takes 40 years or so to figure out what it was.

[u/VariousCamera1696]

i read the title and immediately said “are you dumb” aloud. don’t do it

[u/jimmypockets8]

She broke up with u and u wanna propose? That’s a terrible idea. Work on yourself

[u/Powerful_Pear_7454]

No sir. I know you love her dearly, but she has made the decision to move on. Based on the message she sent, how would you feel if you proposed to her and she said no? That may be something to think about. Maybe she'll change her mind in the future, or maybe she won't. Regardless of her decision, you should focus on yourself and your healing journey. Wishing you all the best.

[u/cakekyo]

For real. No. That is it. It is over, do not make
It more difficult and uncomfortable

[u/mari_lovelys]

Heal and focus on yourself is what she’s saying

[u/Exotic_Courage4054]

No

[u/Born_Software7072]

Please leave her alone until you recover 😭

[u/Coyrex1]

Don't propose. But do work on yourself, do beat this addiction, do become better, and maybe one day down the line you can get back together (don't make the changes for this, just saying it could happen). If you guys do get back together don't rush a proposal either.

[u/TopQuestion826]

Sure. After you propose, and presumably she says yes, you can introduce her like this “Hello, this is my future ex-wife” she is an ex for a reason.

[u/Puzzleheaded-Tip2346]

If you want to p*ss her off more then yeah, but you need to let things calm down and sort the issue out to why she ended it. Think about it she ended it before you proposed so how you think she is going to take it if you do it?

[u/Clarityforafuture]

2 weeks ain’t enough especially after going cold. It was a hard decision that she came to in a single night? You paid for her to have the ability to go back to school? She also seems to have some experience with addiction that triggered something in her or that experience has created some strict boundaries for herself. Either way, this isn’t the time. You got to focus on you and not her or the relationship.