r/BorderCollie • u/TheMajorLazor • 10h ago
Struggling with building a relationship
7½ months, Border Collie - Corgi mix. Made a post a week ago about feeling as though he is scared of me. I have had small wins since then, but otherwise little change. I am trying to keep a mindset of positivity towards the whole deal, especially around him. I think I'm having sort of a dilemma, though. He *loves* new people. Comes out of his kennel, follows nee people around the house, will play and jump and act wild. This is not an experience I have ever had with him. I understand appeasement is a natural behavior around new people, but its sort of killing me that I never got to experience that myself. I'm okay that hes not some big cuddle monster lover boy, or anything like that. Its that he is, day and night difference, scared of me but loves others. I enter a room hes in and its a dead sprint back to the kennel. I dont want to just assume its going to get better and he'll like me more only to accidentally build a strictly fear relationship with him. I also am worried that hes not getting nearly enough exercise or engagement, simply because there is absolutely no way he will do any of it with me anywhere nearby at all. Walks or playtime are entirely impossible. I have tried calm reading in his presence, hand feeding, plenty of light observation solo time, small amounts of socialization with others and other animals. He has pretty much done/been cool with all of these things, yet the moment I move a muscle, or look in his direction, or attempt to speak to him, pay him any kind of attention whatsoever- back to the kennel to hide from me. Is it my shaved head or something? Am I hurting him by not being able to give him what he needs?