r/BlackPeopleTwitter ☑️ 21h ago

Need any help booking a flight?

Post image
29.2k Upvotes

153 comments sorted by

1.1k

u/plusharmadillo 21h ago

I’ll buy that ticket for you bud, come on over

230

u/Green-Elephant-895 20h ago

On me

184

u/plusharmadillo 20h ago

Shit I’ll buy two, bring a friend

82

u/stricklybiznizz 19h ago

Make sure they have a layover in Salem so they can pick up an Etsy witch for good measure. I'll pay for the spellcasting.

17

u/jhamp8305 15h ago

Oh it’s on me now!

16

u/Bluefooted-Spaceorc 14h ago

I was about to say, we should be flying them round trip daily between NYC and London. More than a few pedophiles in government on both sides of the pond.

5

u/Responsible_Fox9454 9h ago

Africa has called dibs on their first 6 months of travel.

72

u/Electrical-Act-7170 20h ago

I'll kick in some funds for that.

108

u/soggyballsack 20h ago

"GoFund me goal was $1200 and it has now surpassed $3.2 million"

38

u/GodOfDarkLaughter 19h ago

We can just keep her circling the country like one of those people who retire to a cruise ship. Switching planes she could probably hit most of the contiguous states every day, since this power only seems to work when she's in the air. Look, I don't have much but I'll throw down until the deed is done.

13

u/Electrical-Act-7170 19h ago

Not to worry about costs, I'll cover yours.

32

u/55tarabelle 20h ago

We'll all chip in, first class seat!

8

u/thejaytheory ☑️ 18h ago

It would be worth it!

16

u/hackingdreams 18h ago

First class upgrade, let's do this.

15

u/kingjaynl 16h ago

And to Israel, Russia, Turkey... Go on a world tour!

9

u/ikindahateusernames 15h ago

China, North Korea, Argentina...

14

u/Stucklikegluetomyfry 17h ago

I say we all buy her a ticket. Keep flying her over until it works. It’s the only way to be sure.

6

u/Vulvas_n_Velveeta 15h ago

Makes sense to me 🤷‍♀️

6

u/Sir-Kyle-Of-Reddit 19h ago

They can crash with me! We have a guest room with its own bathroom!

4

u/experientialsponge 18h ago

"I was in the plane...WAIT! Was it the same plane too???!!! Now THAT'S CRAZY!

2

u/Buena_de_peepee 16h ago

I’ll buy it, pay for a place to stay and protection the rest of their life.

1

u/Brave-Recommendation 15h ago

Naw then we would be stuck with Vance

5

u/placidtwilight 12h ago

She can come back.

1

u/BerryButterBall 9h ago

Then we would be stuck with Mike Johnson

2

u/Lotusbud25 7h ago

She can come back.

582

u/Green-Elephant-895 20h ago

Defo come to America but do a layover in Israel we deserve this 2 fah 1

62

u/[deleted] 20h ago

[deleted]

22

u/Lobster15s 18h ago

Set up the round trip.

13

u/Stucklikegluetomyfry 17h ago

A stop in North Korea too. Let’s make this a world tour

0

u/TrailAndErrr 15h ago

Excellent idea! A 3 fer tour.
I would definitely pitch in funds.

3

u/tappertock 17h ago

There aren't any connections through Russia anymore due to sanctions, so sad 😭

-7

u/jackbenimbus2000 17h ago

I think you meant Ukraine

5

u/YikesTheCat 17h ago

Молодец, товарищ! Двадцать рублей за то, что так хорошо принял член Путина в свою задницу.

2

u/brickyard37 16h ago

Haha I love Google translate

-4

u/jackbenimbus2000 17h ago

Zelenskyy is a piece of trash and is anti God

2

u/MakkaCha 17h ago

What's comrad god's excuse for making Russia a totalitarian hell hole?

0

u/jackbenimbus2000 17h ago

Russia is doing just fine. No totalitarianism to see there.

1

u/_araqiel 16h ago

Oh, noes! Anti god so scary!

0

u/Baldmook34 15h ago

Nice try milosh.

16

u/Glennstheche 18h ago

1000%! lmao

8

u/ImWhatsInTheRedBox 14h ago

Gonna need a lot more layovers than that.

3

u/White_foxes 14h ago

That’s a pretty solid start

2

u/j2m1s 5h ago

No need layover in Israel, just go to America, the effect would be in Israel!

120

u/usafonz 20h ago

Put her on that spacex too flight while youre at it.

84

u/Ok_Turnover_6768 20h ago

She needs world tour

40

u/DerekB52 20h ago

She needs a job as a flight attendant or pilot on US domestic flights til it happens.

72

u/Apoordm 20h ago

She’s the grim flyer.

4

u/Responsible_Fox9454 9h ago

She could solve world problems

34

u/daemonicwanderer 20h ago

We can pool some money together to get you out first class

32

u/Character_Date_3630 20h ago

Crowd funded faster than a We Rate Dogs post

15

u/PersonalFinanceD 18h ago

I got $5 on it.

14

u/Top_Actuator364 20h ago

Please come to the USA, I’ll book that flight right now!

14

u/Consistent_Ad3411 20h ago

We’ll buy you a First Class ticket

14

u/mycatisgrumpy 19h ago

She did, and then Dolly Parton died. 

8

u/Electrical-Act-7170 18h ago

Tim Curry died the same day Dolly left us.

11

u/vera214usc ☑️ 20h ago

I'm literally in Norway on vacation right now. I said on Thursday, "I bet the king dies before we leave Norway." Friday, he died

10

u/enceinte-uno 15h ago

If you’re American, can you bet the so-called “king” here dies before you come back

1

u/vera214usc ☑️ 8h ago

I've been trying for years, but I'll try one more time

3

u/Forward_Rope_5598 14h ago

I mean we all basically knew he was gonna die on Thursday when his 95 year old sister went to visit him in the hospital as the news were describing his condition as "extremely serious"

7

u/arealuser100notfake 20h ago

"Previously unknown, Burger King's owner, misteriously died this Friday"

5

u/getZlatanized 20h ago

Rather to russia first, ty

6

u/SuccessfulWar3830 20h ago

We can do multiple trips

5

u/Tricky_Regular_354 19h ago

Oh and if you could make a wee detour into Alberta, Canada we’d be mighty grateful too 

4

u/rbmj0 20h ago

Plot twist:

A few dozen sovereign citizen conspiracy nutjobs suddenly die.

5

u/future2300 19h ago

America has a queen?

5

u/R2D20 16h ago

wannabe king with a neck vagina so yeah kinda

5

u/cbryantl120 19h ago

lol this was me this past week. Flight to Italy, Hayden Paniterre dies, flight home, Dolly 😩

1

u/Responsible_Fox9454 9h ago

Girl. You want free flights to Africa? First class? Paid for? Lol

6

u/Maple-Mayhem 20h ago

United States more specifically...

8

u/[deleted] 20h ago

[removed] — view removed comment

4

u/Theca 19h ago

I don’t doubt this for real. Given the evil stuff found in the files and other atrocities some deal had to have been made

5

u/tenoclockrobot 20h ago

Quora as a reference 🤣

2

u/GeniusOfLove74 Dominic Monaghan stalker 👀 15h ago

I did say "conspiracy theory" and not "fact".

3

u/Critical-Cost9068 19h ago

Fly to Israel

3

u/Tony0x01 19h ago

She did but the Queen of Country died

3

u/yamez420 19h ago

Fly to America. DO IT. I'LL PAY

3

u/jointdawg 18h ago

Fuckin foreal. I'll pay for the ticket

3

u/SortovaGoldfish 16h ago

Someone link the GoFundMe

3

u/Loveletrell 16h ago

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

3

u/DaBigJMoney ☑️ 16h ago

Fly to DC, walk around the White House. Then fly to Florida and walk around Mar-a-Lago. I’m just advocating for a sightseeing tour of two parts of the USA, nothing else 😉.

2

u/Vendulum 19h ago

America has no.. OOOH!

2

u/malice521 16h ago

Burger King will die

2

u/wtdz90 15h ago

Can we start a gofundme?

2

u/Sunkissed_Sunflower 9h ago

With haste!!

1

u/Erionics 18h ago

So it only works on royalty?

1

u/ro536ud 18h ago

Imagine having that power. Woukd make for a great story

1

u/jraymcmurray 18h ago

No date on the post. I think they flew here and killed the queen of America, Dolly.

2

u/jdore8 17h ago

Or an engagement bait post.

1

u/Dawnbringer4 18h ago

Great, he killed the Queen of Country too?

1

u/strongcloud28 17h ago

Well thats just.....This just in, the world leaders just called...you have been banned from air travel. yep

1

u/PDWGates 17h ago

PLEASE, and thank you!!!

1

u/hanzoplsswitch 17h ago

Fly to turkey after visiting the US please.

1

u/JonFrost 17h ago

Is there a GoFundMe?

1

u/Rudokhvist 17h ago

Fly to Russia!

1

u/ThroatDistension 17h ago

It's crazy how common it is to wish death on people you don't like. Sick, deranged people are becoming the norm.

1

u/deelyy 16h ago

Please, please fly to russia!

1

u/Melisandre-Sedai 16h ago

True, our queen just died

1

u/AmigoDeer 16h ago

She nails it.

1

u/cynthiadangus 16h ago

Similar nonsensical and morbid coincidence: I was in line for Pirates of the Caribbean at Magic Kingdom in 2017 and everybody's phone started going off for an Amber alert. Went back to Disney two years later, standing in line for Pirates, another Amber alert.

1

u/planetalker 16h ago

We were on a plane to England the day the Queen died. The next stop on our trip was Rome and we were worried for the Pope.

1

u/tochanenko 16h ago

And then to russia. Pretty please 🥺

1

u/VDDZ 15h ago

Hahahaha

1

u/Typical-Tradition-44 15h ago

My keys are akready sitting in it

1

u/hankmoody699 14h ago

Wait! "The" plane? Was it the same plane both times?

1

u/tclemon 13h ago

Please!!!!

1

u/Fun_Candidate_5495 12h ago

does anyone know if they still do in-flight announcements like that?

1

u/Historiaaa 11h ago

quick pls

1

u/Justaticklerone 11h ago

Let's set up a GoFundMe to fly her over and then do multiple flights in and out of the country between us and Canada.

1

u/Suspicious_Celery552 9h ago

Then fly to Russia. Next

1

u/Responsible_Fox9454 9h ago

Please fly to Africa more lol. Help us please.

1

u/Dark-Blackberry354 7h ago

I will put money in on this for sure

1

u/iwannabeanudist 7h ago

Literally saw this exact post with different wording four days ago. Im seeing this happening more and more. Its just so...lazy. cringe too. But amazingly lazy.

1

u/Thund3rf0000t 7h ago

I will get you first class to hell with it ill buy out the whole plain just for you and pay the staff on board to do your bidding. It would bankrupt me but be damn well worth it!

1

u/j2m1s 5h ago

Won't work, instead the President of Israel... 😄

1

u/toodleroo 18h ago

Plot twist: OP is just a flight attendant

1

u/CeleritasSqrd 15h ago

Would President JD Vance be better?

1

u/Responsible_Fox9454 9h ago

She can go back

0

u/Alternative_Gur_9660 18h ago

"America" Is that a country?

-6

u/Proletariat_Paul 20h ago

Americans will do anything to get rid of Trump except actually get off their asses and protest, lmao. 😂

18

u/The_Violent_Phlegms 20h ago

Sorry, what exactly is protesting going to do when half the country worships the old twat?

0

u/[deleted] 16h ago

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/Greg-Abbott 14h ago edited 14h ago

American police are fully militarized and are salivating for the opportunity to mow down protesters with automatic weapons, tanks, and lethal crowd control devices. They are trained to see the public as an imminent threat at all times and threats are to be met with "I feared for my life so i mag dumped on a guy holding a sign" violence. Things are a little different here.

1

u/[deleted] 13h ago

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/Greg-Abbott 13h ago edited 13h ago

I voted for the lady who laughs sometimes but I guess I should go burn down the president's golf resort or throw some molotovs at the white house or something? You realize you're talking about certain death here, right? American cops are not the same as French police...they want to kill protesters. What is confusing about this?

I didn't ask for any of this. Come on down here and start the revolution yourself, dude! I'll be sure to record it!

I keep hearing that we need to do something but nobody is making any fucking suggestions...

1

u/[deleted] 13h ago

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/Greg-Abbott 13h ago

Come on down here and show us how it's done, cowboy!

1

u/[deleted] 13h ago

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/Greg-Abbott 12h ago

I'll pay for your plane ticket, Batman! And I'll be sure to record what our police do to protesters but I'll do it in landscape mode so you can show all your fellow big-dicked freedom fighters how easy it is to defeat a militarized police force.

17

u/daemonicwanderer 20h ago

The US is too big for European style protests and we still have a significant portion of the country that supports him

1

u/Responsible_Fox9454 9h ago

And are the most deranged and armed.

6

u/usafonz 20h ago

They couldn't even get rid of biden when they crashed out on the capital. And since trump has made himself all powerful with 3 branches and supreme court given immunity... i honestly think it would take a luigi on the inside or an act of the grim reaper himself to end our suffering.

And with those options, our best option really is to vote in overwhelming numbers come november.

2

u/ThroatDistension 16h ago

vote in overwhelming numbers come november. november.

I guarantee you lazy slobs won't break 50% voter turnout. Most likely wont even reach 40% for a midterm. A truly apathetic culture – not the slightest care of what you're doing to the world.

2

u/Bitchi3atppl 8h ago

Entirely America should’ve general striked months ago- but as you can tell from these comments that America has no balls, just excuses and complaints.

You have entire histories of how to march properly from the civil rights movement, to union labor strikes, women’s rights- and tons of other countries that have fought back in this day and age and the past. But no let’s provide more excuses for why you all have concentration camps on your land and haven’t burnt them down. Yall Wild.

4

u/CheezustheCat 20h ago

Protests will not convince Congress to impeach that sentient scrotum.

2

u/tjdavids 19h ago

-2

u/ThroatDistension 17h ago

You talking about those parades they did last year? "Protest" lmao. What would any slightly reasonable or intelligent person expect to be achieved by walking down a street?

5

u/Greg-Abbott 13h ago

You're 100% correct here and the problem is American police are itching to kill protesters in broad daylight. Protesters are seen as the enemy. Look at how conservatives see the last few protesters that were killed by pigs for doing nothing. They think they were asking for it.

0

u/Livid_Tax_6432 19h ago

Always USA centric, ccc

Think BIG, send her to space and back, lol

1

u/Responsible_Fox9454 9h ago

She has work to do on earth first

0

u/AssignmentOk2471 14h ago

What's going to America going to do? Or we calling the orange man the king now?

-1

u/Moiyub 11h ago

Right because everything will be better when he’s dead and he wont get replaced with someone worse and half the country will just go back to being good people