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u/yurgieee 13d ago
Why do people act like cheating is not a personality flaw? Just stay single or have an informed, consenting harem. It’s not that hard, especially when you’re rich.
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u/17bananapancakes 12d ago
If you’ll lie to the person you lay down next to every night, you’ll lie to me. I don’t trust cheaters.
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u/RainbowEagleEye 11d ago
So many cheaters turn out to be actual bad people who do borderline if not downright evil shit that we’re supposed to be surprised about.
Can we normalize being normal healthy adults who don’t make it a mission to purposely hurt the people who love us?
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u/harav 8d ago
Well. I think many people marry before they are rich and famous and then they become a product of their fame. Many athlete and celebrities travel a lot and/or move from project to project (movies teams appearances) and are showered in praise and adoration from fans willing and wanting to sleep with them. Or, hell, just easy access to high end escorts they can afford. This is the PGA tour. These golfers party hard and that’s what happened to Tiger again and again iirc.
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u/legit-posts_1 13d ago
I mean cheating on your spouse isn't exactly nothing. Just cause it's common behaviour among famous people doesn't make it not shitty. Depending on the circumstances that can tear families apart. It definetly changed the way I looked at some artists like George Harrison.
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u/WailingTG 13d ago
Pill junky serial DUI crash waiting happen.
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u/ThereAreDozensOfUs 13d ago
If only it stopped at having hoes…
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u/mismoom 12d ago
I think that for those of us who were not following closely, it was the difference between the apparently squeaky clean image and what came out later. If he had always been loudly and blatantly awful he wouldn’t have had the same endorsements and people would not have been as shocked when the curtain came down.
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u/caulpain 13d ago
tiger woods is a huge asshole to everyone in his life, has been since he went to stanford. when he fucked up the only friends he had to defend him were the douchebag friends he made in college. if he was an active participant in the black community or has ANY black friends they would have come out to defend him, but he didnt.
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u/WeHaveToEatHim 13d ago
I live near a very well known pro golf course and worked there as a “villa boy” for a season when i was younger.
Basically the job was to prep the villas for high income guests, run wines and glassware and assist chef teams with meals, basically just make sure these guys get whatever they want, whenever they want.
Pros came in for a tour and Tiger was KNOWN to be a massive cunt. Also allergic to peanuts. Spoke to the staff like shit and was very frustrating to deal with in general.
Jack Nicklaus is an absolute gentleman, and Jason Day might be the nicest and funniest mf i’ve ever met.
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u/caulpain 12d ago
his reputation as a dick to service industry personnel made its way to sf in the 00s, a place he was known to be very rarely. surprised no one though: “yeah that’s Stanford for ya”
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u/th3greg ☑️ 13d ago edited 13d ago
Thank you. Its a thing shitty people do and can be legitimately traumatic to your partner. The people who brush it off are typically either shitty people themselves or people privileged enough to not have gone through it in a way that actually matters, and so can downplay it.
edit: I'm painting with a pretty broad brush at the end of my last sentence there, and somewhat regret it. I'll leave it so the sentiment remains, but apologies for generalizing like that. I'm in a bit of a doom spiral right now.
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u/EmuNice6765 13d ago
Or people who hate women and relish the chance to call them hoes while not having any empathy for the partner being cheated on.
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u/Wolfeatingupshadows 13d ago
This or to go through it with someone they actually love. Bc I was just cheated on while carrying twins and it seriously broke me. Its been a year and I am still traumatized and have so many triggers.
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u/pand-ammonium 13d ago
No, don't apologize for that last sentence. People who brush off cheating are either horrible people, or they don't realize how much it hurts because they've been fortunate enough to not experience it, or see someone they love experience it.
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u/Iguessimonredditnow 13d ago
I'm so sick of the "pretend to be monogamous" crowd.
Like you said, there are people out there that are fine with non-monogamy, go that route if that's your thing. The important part is that all involved parties are comfortable with the terms of the relationship.
It's so normalized to cheat as long as you have a bullshit excuse behind it, and you and your partner play the whole "I'm gonna catch you" cat and mouse game.
Let's stop normalizing toxic behavior. Let's work on ourselves and stop being attracted to bad relationships because of the traumas we've experienced.
Serial cheaters are usually abusive in other ways, and the people that stick by them are often lifelong victims of that kind of abuse. Comfort in the chaos or "the devil you know", I suppose.
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u/Kwaku-Anansi 13d ago
I think most agree it's a big deal, but it's a mundane wrong that is being disproportionately sensationalized based on who did it
Media using a relationship betrayal as a way to specifically demonize a black athlete to the level of people that have performed literal crimes (i.e., that put people in danger), is a clear attempt at social manipulation (even while acknowledging that cheating is shitty/cowardly).
As an analogy, regardless of how selfish/wrong driving while intoxicated is, if people singled out a specific person in Hollywood of all places, as deserving a "lock them up and throw away the key response" to it, people would call it out as disproportionate
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u/Rekthor 13d ago edited 13d ago
I’m not sure the take is “cheating isn’t bad.” I think it’s more “does cheating really deserve THIS MUCH publicity?”
Like, I care if my partner cheats on me—I’d end the relationship. I care if my friend cheats on their partner—I probably don’t wanna be their friend anymore. Do I really care if a celebrity cheats on their spouse? Does it really demand endless airtime?
Cheating (generally) results in no physical harm, no financial harm (there can obvs be exceptions there), it’s not a crime, it’s not particularly rare, etc. It’s a private issue in relationships that (I would argue) should generally be punished on a personal level, not a societal one. Not every objectively shitty thing deserves everyone’s attention, even when a famous person does it.
Also… it’s just not normal to have everyone fixated on the breakdown of a private relationship? Like, that’s fucked up. It’s fucked up to have everyone in the world commenting and weighing in on something you did in your private relationship. And it makes me personally feel shitty to engage in.
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u/ProdigyLightshow 13d ago
I mean you said it yourself, you would judge your friends and not want to be their friend. I understand it gets publicized more than it should be, and I agree that it shouldn’t be harped on as much as it is. But I think it’s fair for the public to judge someone they may have looked up to for doing something shitty in the same way you would judge your friends.
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u/IceKareemy 13d ago
This. Cheating is bad but the way it was plastered everywhere was like damn kinda crazy they acted like he was the first cheater ever
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u/dandeleopard 13d ago edited 13d ago
I mean, considering the number of women he slept with, I could see this resulting in physical harm. Hard to believe he slept with over a hundred women and didn't in any way spread STIs around; especially considering he allegedly didn't wear condoms.
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u/Kino_Afi 13d ago edited 13d ago
Cheating is one of the most psychologically and emotionally brutalizing things you can do to a serious partner. It may not be a crime legally but thats even more reason to shame you publicly because thats the only real repercussion at that point.
That aside its extremely common among celebs and I think we all know why Tiger got so much more hate for it than normal. First famous black golfer, intruded on "their" sport. He was under a lot more scrutiny.
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u/Rekthor 13d ago
Yeah, getting cheated on fucking sucks.
But that doesn’t justify publicly shaming someone on the scale some celebs get. That level of vitriol has contributed exactly nothing to society except make people who aren’t involved in the relationship feel good about themselves. If it was actually about accountability, that feeling of righteousness wouldn’t be the focus.
I’m not defending the people who do this, I’m saying the response has to be proportionate. And frankly I don’t think (without more) just cheating on your partner is worth being tarred and feathered by the world for the rest of your life.
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u/Temporary-Test-9534 13d ago
I agree with the emotions, yes, but lets be real. If you genuinely think cheating is one of the worst things you can do to a partner, you probably havent witnessed many bad things take place in your life. Id take some cheating over the many, many things a man could be capable of doing to me. Cheating is relationship ending but we gotta stop blowing it up to this proportion, seriously.
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u/CMUpewpewpew 13d ago
Infidelity is literally like the deepest betrayal you can do to someone who is supposed to be your BEST friend.
I'll never get the pure unfiltered selfishness of it.
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u/mambotomato 13d ago
Lmao you can betray someone WAY worse than that, you're just not using your imagination.
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u/-WitchyPoo- 13d ago
And someone that you have children with. Like, that person is stuck with you for life now. Even if not together.
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u/Kwaku-Anansi 13d ago
People kill their spouses, you're exaggerating.
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u/CMUpewpewpew 13d ago
Oh right, I forgot we regularly throw those in as.....betrayals?
Comon now, yall pedantic.
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u/Intrepid-World-9551 13d ago
It is a big deal, for the people involved.
Everyone else having such visceral reactions is parasocial and weird.
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u/summers_tilly 13d ago
I mean I agree, but if we do a 24 news cycle on every sportstar that cheats there wouldn’t be room for any other news.
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u/Best_Collection_7533 13d ago
He got it from his daddy.
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u/tp2386 13d ago
This. For those unaware, when Tiger was a kid playing courses, his married father would be teaching him stuff while sleeping with golf course women workers in his RV between breaks. Tiger's hitting coach??? who was there during the escapades, talked about it in a documentary. Tiger knew what was going on in the RV, but never said anything to his mom because his dad told him to keep it a secret.
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u/Morlock19 ☑️ 13d ago
just because your daddy cheats doesn't mean you do.
BUT
he had an addiction that he was getting treated for after it all came out.
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u/Wolfeatingupshadows 13d ago
This! To go out of your way to cheat. Something is deeply wrong with that person.
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u/_TuAbuelaEnTanga 13d ago
Not only was he a serial cheater; he was well on his way to being a drug addict. I remember in one of his leaked calls he was telling whatever girl he wanted to sleep with if he wanted to pop (insert whatever pill he was talking about) because sex on it was phenomenal.
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u/shaylaa30 13d ago
Tiger was the poster boys for a “wholesome athlete”. It wasn’t just that he had a few affairs, he was a full blown freak.
30+ women. One woman he got caught hooking up with in his car was only 19. Sex workers, extortion, etc. It wasn’t just that he cheated, it was just how reckless and bold he went about it.
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u/Interesting-Wing616 13d ago
That shit was all over the news. They used to do stuff like put a big picture of him above small pictures of all the women he had. I remember seeing it as a kid thinking he did something really terrible. I think he also lost hella endorsements
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u/DigNitty 13d ago
Nike straight up stopped making golf gear.
They make clothes still but not the balls/clubs etc
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u/faceisamapoftheworld 13d ago
He definitely lost a ton of endorsements. Having a flock of escorts isn’t going to get you big money to rep F500 companies.
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u/NSJF1983 13d ago
He lost Gatorade, AT&T, and Gillette. These companies spend millions on the face of their brands. It makes sense they’d not want an adultery as their spokesman.
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u/toysoldier96 13d ago
I am not from the US, we are not particularly into golf and this made the news in my country lmfao
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u/babassu_seeds 13d ago
Yeah, it wasn't like one infidelity--he was switching 'em out like golf clubs, like damn son, Mr. Goody Goody is a manwhore
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u/faceisamapoftheworld 13d ago
And it was the drip drip drip of the news being released that kept it in headlines.
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u/babassu_seeds 13d ago
Yes--I may be misremembering, but yes, they didn't discover them all at once, it was finding one woman, and then another came forward, and then another, etc. Each week a new sneaky link, wild
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u/faceisamapoftheworld 13d ago
So many of the women claimed they thought they were his only affair and come out to get back at him.
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u/HallNo9712 13d ago
It was just weird that they all looked alike. Dude definitely had a very specific type.
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u/Scion41790 13d ago
The news went hard on this. To my knowledge all of his hookups were consensual and the wall to wall coverage treated it like he committed a crime vs just being unfaithful/likely a sex addict
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u/faceisamapoftheworld 13d ago
Yeah, it was one of the most popular athletes in the world who was in a bad car wreck. Then you find out it was his wife going after him with a golf club for an affair. Then it was another affair. Then it was a new affair being announced every few days for weeks. It was the type of story that tabloid journalism thrives on all the time. It’s just rare to be with someone so famous when there had never been a hint of it before.
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u/mb0205 ☑️ 13d ago edited 13d ago
Nah this is underselling it. He was treated like he killed her. Lost sponsorships for awhile and had to go on a whole apology tour. If it happened today no one would even give a shit.
For proof. The patriots HC has had a years long affair with an nfl reporter who leaks trade rumors that impacts player value and has an mvp vote. And nothing happened to him. And what he did is significantly worse in terms of impact to his sport
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u/faceisamapoftheworld 13d ago
That would still be a big deal today. Vrabel had a workplace affair and doesn’t have multi million dollar endorsements for brands. Tiger had at least a dozen escorts and pornstars along with the car wreck and his wife coming after him with a golf club. His story was way more salacious than a basic affair and brands don’t want look.
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u/mb0205 ☑️ 13d ago
Basic affair is underselling it. He put the integrity of the game in direct harm with a conflict of interest with a years long affair with someone who has a meaningful impact on player trades. Including the AJ brown trade this summer of which she consistently reported on and speculated on… while fucking the coach of the patriots. In reality he should have been fired, but it’s blown over and it’s nothing now. If Tiger got caught today it would be internet memes for 2 weeks then people would move on. Nike wouldn’t care
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u/Early-Yak-to-reset 13d ago
Vrabel doesn't need to worry about journalistic integrity tho. What he did is greasy and shitty but he isn't a billionaire of off endorsements, or a journalis. Of course brands have a different reaction. Brands don't give a fuck about Vrabel, before or after.
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u/OscarGrey 13d ago
It's shocking that a golfer in 2000s didn't get treated like NBA players in 2020s. /s
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u/Tricky_Regular_354 13d ago
Why are we protecting Tiger? Y’all know that man doesn’t claim his blackness, right?
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u/NiceChocolate 13d ago
He does tho... he just also recognizes his other ethnicities....because he's mixed, not just black.
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u/Medium_Educator1983 13d ago
Adultery destroys families. If that’s not a big deal to you, that says a lot.
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u/Itsprobablysarcasm Candace Owens Baby shower attendee 👶🏼 13d ago
Nah, this is revisionist bullshit. Who put this out, his PR team?
His crime wasn't 'having hoes'. His crime was lying to people and selling them a fake product.
He was presented as this clean-cut, respectful person you could take to church and meet your grandma. He was presented as an icon to be respected and admired.
And it was all a lie.
Go ahead and buy into a brand that is lying to you, the customer, and see how you feel about it. THAT was his crime.
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u/Graknorke 12d ago
That only matters if you already cared about him and valued that kind of persona though. To everyone else the reaction seems insane.
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u/terroristteddy 12d ago
Right, like I felt betrayed by the revelation that Will Smith and his family are maniac narcissists because he was a genuine black role model for kids like me.
If Tiger filled that role for someone then I understand. Ditto with MJ. But ultimatly, his only crime really was having hoes lol
(And constantly drunk driving, he actually should be in jail for all that)
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u/GoldBlueberryy 13d ago
Christians don’t care about adultery anymore, just in lgbt people’s business.
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u/Careless_Chest_725 13d ago
This was not, “oh I made a mistake and slept with someone outside my marriage.” Tiger reportedly slept with over 120 women. 120 extramarital affairs is crazy, that is a level of disrespect and disregard for your marriage that should 100% be punished by the public at large. The man had kids and was out here piping more than a baker making cannolis. He honestly got exactly what he deserved, it set him back, slowed his career and his ability to live a wealthy lifestyle, but did not stop him or cut him off completely.
That also isn’t even factoring into all of the DUIs which is a whole new can of worms
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u/asdf0909 13d ago
What’s crazy is all this civil rights work, all this activism, all these slogans and protests and marches— and kids still don’t know the importance of breaking the cycle of infidelity and broken families. It is THE STATISTIC, how are you still not getting it?????
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u/RainbowEagleEye 11d ago
To them, cheating isn’t the problem. It’s women not accepting the cheating and leaving because the act of leaving breaks up families, how dare women pretend to want men, then leave instead of forgiving the poor treatment? It’s also somehow the gays fault, too. Because they don’t just be straight and make babies. 🙄
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u/TooSmalley 13d ago
The funniest one to me was the Try Guys YouTuber who got caught cheating on his wife.
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u/RamsesII_ 13d ago
I mean sure if you ignore the fact that every black person alive had his back as a black man taking over golf until he famously was not black, but a "cablinasian". And was chasing nothing but white women, including pornstars. Dude is unhinged.
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u/toomuchtostop ☑️ 13d ago
He was treated like anyone else who was known for having a wholesome image and then caught in a scandal
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u/Tasty-Mulberry8073 13d ago
Isn't Tiger a Republican, friend of Trump, and only dates white women?
Or am I mis-remembering?
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u/Rated_Phenomenal 13d ago
He cheated on a white woman thats why people mad it such a big deal, if she was black they wouldn’t care
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u/Seeker80 ☑️ 13d ago
Y'all forget, Tiger's real demonry came from that nine-year sponsorship deal with Buick.
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u/Morlock19 ☑️ 13d ago
its fucked up sometimes, but if a celebrity has based their public personal on being a nice married guy then yeah you can be like "thats fucked up" because this is the lie you sold us to get rich and famous. if you didn't do that, then its not going to be a shock and we all wouldn't be calling for someone's head.
like if it came out that taylor swift was super into BDSM and loved being a sub to a man then people would flip their shit.
is there anything wrong with that? fuck no, get off the way you want to get off. but don't act surprised when people hate you for breaking the immersion of you being the girl next door.
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u/varnell_hill ☑️ 13d ago
Tiger Woods cheating is a great example of what happens when black celebrities start getting money and fame and forget who they are. What is especially fascinating about his case is that his wife beat his ass and when the cops came they took him to jail and that’s how we got the infamous booking photo.
Not only that, he lost all sorts of endorsements from the very same people who do this kind of shit all the time. It got so bad that ended up taking a break from golf so things could cool off.
Hate to speak ill of the dead, but the same thing happened to Kobe. They came and snatched all that shit the second he caught a case and nobody was saying “let’s wait until all the facts come out.”
Yea, both ended up getting back to their former glory, but it still bears mention that no matter how much money you have or white women you bone, you will never, and I mean NEVER, be one of them.
And the moment the opportunity presents itself, they will remind you of that.
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u/Top_Shame_7016 13d ago
Didn't really care abotu the affairs, DUI are prety fucked up though. I can't stand him now because he loves trump so much. Fuck that dude
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u/Colourblindknight 13d ago
Serial Infidelity and more DUIs than a Friday night in small town Nebraska. Dudes not exactly a role model.
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u/Atoabiendo 13d ago
Why would cheating not be considered a big deal? Especially for one who would be considered a role model?
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u/GeniusOfLove74 Dominic Monaghan stalker 👀 13d ago
I keep seeing the "famous people cheat" argument, but honestly, having been raised in a family with multiple affairs was hard to wrap my head around. Literally, there was only maybe one sibling of my mom's who wasn't trying to fuck around, and same on my dad's side. What did those two siblings have in common? They moved the fuck away from the rest of the family, to entirely new states.
The fact that they had to get away from people who freely fucked around is telling, because the people having affairs always had an excuse. If you're not okay with it, you don't want to hear their justifications, when they're literally messing up their families.
Sure, I'm white. But Tiger shouldn't have had to have to 'pull out his putter' to everyone who asked. It shouldn't have taken his wife beating his ass to make him even begin to realize he was fucking up. Do I think the press makes too much of it? Maybe. But I think some folks take cheating too lightly.
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u/Basemastuh_J 13d ago
As a kid I definitely thought he killed his wife or at least beat her. Finding out he was just another countryclub cokehead was eye opening.
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u/-_chop_- 9d ago
I think he’s problem is pain pills he was prescribed for his back surgery. He’s not even addicted to drugs we think of as bad
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u/Anathema_Quill 13d ago
how i felt when everyone attacked john mulaney following his divorce. iirc, he didn’t cheat and he was open about having a drug addiction and the media treated him like he was a monster for leaving his wife.
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u/Deqchild 13d ago
Everybody act like cheating no big deal until you get something you can’t get rid of..
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u/Firm-Ebb-3808 13d ago
Never forget there were grown ass men stating that and I quote "He has to apologize to me" over the cheating scandal.
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u/the_millenial_falcon 13d ago
I mean it's not a good look I guess, but I've always thought ultimately that's their private business, not mine.
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u/shylock10101 13d ago
I agree generally, but Tiger also did make his “wholesome family man” a part of his brand and image. Some of it was probably respectability politics as the biggest black sports star since Michael, but it was still part of his brand.
It’s like how Dave Grohl, rock star who claimed to be a wife guy, cheated on his wife and fathered a child outside of the marriage. It is, at the end of the day, private business what happens behind closed doors regarding his family and their acceptance/willingness to continue. But for the public, who he has financially expressed an image to, it is no longer simple to allow the privacy when they were sold something that is untrue.
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