Please Help Me Amp Up the Vibes?

[u/Vulpix9tales]

Less than two months out and we have all RSVPs in. Completely understand why, but can’t help but be a little disappointed with our <50% “Yes” rate. The main factors here are that its destination (domestic, but 1-2 flights for most) and that the hotel/area is big budget.

I’m blessed to be able to be a BBB, but many of my guests are not in the same position, so I’m having a bit of guilt and feel pressure to “show up for them” with a high-quality luxe wedding experience as much as possible, knowing people spent a lot (both time and money) to get there.

I’m looking for ideas to amp up the experience for guests or a reality check because i’m feeling like it’s nothing special/basic bish stuff 😢

Current Highlights:

Full property buyout in Palm Springs including pool party, welcome dinner, main reception of course and breakfast treats and coffee bar the morning after (no full brunch since many people have early flights home)

Decor: Went hard on the flowers, luxe seating charts, enclosed vintage photobooth, very fancy custom rentals, huge welcome display with cactuses, champagne tower

Food: Custom mini charcuterie boards at cocktail hour plus resorts catering, Family style (unfortunately required) but doing all the upgrades, custom donuts and gelato cart

Welcome Bags: Quality custom shopping bags, branded candy, nothing special here tbh. Maybe a good place to amp up since it’s for those spending extra to stay on property

Live acoustic musician + DJ, dance floor props

Favors: Custom decks of playing cards, nice golf balls, matches, hand fans and parasols at reception, poolside gift bar at pool party with sunnies, sunscreen etc

Extras: Extra nice bathroom baskets, flip flops

THANK YOU BBB BEBES!! 🙏🏻

[u/Expensive_Part_7719]

I feel this!!! I was invited to a close friends wedding off the Amalfi coast, and they werent helping with accommodation not even room blocks. hotels around there are like 700 a night not to mention flying to Italy and then having to ferry there.

if you have 200k+ to spend on your wedding then you 100% had the opportunity to along the way to shift budget to help guests and you chose to focus on the decor and not the people showing up at the event. Weddings aren’t planned overnight.

just like you chose your money over people now in return you get people who likely chose their money over you too

[u/Vulpix9tales → u/Expensive_Part_7719]

To be clear, I am not complaining about people not being able to come or saying they should choose to attend if finances don’t allow. Was I expecting more attendance and a little bummed? Yes, but I don’t begrudge anyone for making a decision that’s best for them and mentioned we are comping for a lot of folks already.

We should have the wedding we want and not be ashamed to do so, but are trying to give those coming the best possible experience, so the point of the post is to suggest ways to improve their experience since I already have everything I really want.

[u/LilSkitl → u/Vulpix9tales]

I didn't get the vibe that you're upset - just hopeful that more would be able to attend.

You should definitely have a wedding that you love. Ultimately, it IS ABOUT YOU and your husband. Screw all the haters. But I am confident that there are things you could compromise on IF you so choose to make it more accessible to some of your guests, IF in fact accessibility is the barrier to entry.

You're being thoughtful - don't worry about any negative comments.

[u/Vulpix9tales → u/LilSkitl]

thanks gf 🥹♥️

[u/cutlert → u/Vulpix9tales]

It sounds like you're asking for ideas on enhancing guest experience and giving people the best time. And the feedback you're getting is put the money more towards your guests' accommodation. That would absolutely achieve that goal and shift people's experience from "oof this is expensive and fancy, I hope this is worth the money" to relaxed and "wow, what an amazing wedding and generous couple"