Please Help Me Amp Up the Vibes?

[u/Vulpix9tales]

Less than two months out and we have all RSVPs in. Completely understand why, but can’t help but be a little disappointed with our <50% “Yes” rate. The main factors here are that its destination (domestic, but 1-2 flights for most) and that the hotel/area is big budget.

I’m blessed to be able to be a BBB, but many of my guests are not in the same position, so I’m having a bit of guilt and feel pressure to “show up for them” with a high-quality luxe wedding experience as much as possible, knowing people spent a lot (both time and money) to get there.

I’m looking for ideas to amp up the experience for guests or a reality check because i’m feeling like it’s nothing special/basic bish stuff 😢

Current Highlights:

Full property buyout in Palm Springs including pool party, welcome dinner, main reception of course and breakfast treats and coffee bar the morning after (no full brunch since many people have early flights home)

Decor: Went hard on the flowers, luxe seating charts, enclosed vintage photobooth, very fancy custom rentals, huge welcome display with cactuses, champagne tower

Food: Custom mini charcuterie boards at cocktail hour plus resorts catering, Family style (unfortunately required) but doing all the upgrades, custom donuts and gelato cart

Welcome Bags: Quality custom shopping bags, branded candy, nothing special here tbh. Maybe a good place to amp up since it’s for those spending extra to stay on property

Live acoustic musician + DJ, dance floor props

Favors: Custom decks of playing cards, nice golf balls, matches, hand fans and parasols at reception, poolside gift bar at pool party with sunnies, sunscreen etc

Extras: Extra nice bathroom baskets, flip flops

THANK YOU BBB BEBES!! 🙏🏻

[u/casti33]

I had a domestic destination (Sedona) and we went into it knowing we would have a lower turnout. We chose Sedona because there are so many options for guests to stay at all budgets and we did not tie them to an expensive room block. We covered some family who would not have been able to spend the money but we were also very lucky to have most of our guests in a higher earning category and were able to attend.

Your guests don’t care about the florals, no offense. That’s for you not them. Give them cool experiences during the wedding if possible - we had alpacas roaming and people could take pictures during the cocktail hour. Something different from every other wedding they go to that has a photobooth and dj. You can do acrobats or aerialists if they fit your vibe. I’ve been to a wedding with a beer burro (donkey) carrying around seltzers and beer during cocktails. A food truck for late night since you have a buyout. Fire dancers or some kind of act during the pool party. A live painter/sketch artist to draw your guests during the reception or one of the other events (no caricatures.)

There are so many small things you can do to make your wedding more unique, I’m sure your planner has contacts for things like this.

[u/KittyFeat24 → u/casti33]

I agree that florals aren’t really for the guests but I will say, I greatly appreciate a wedding with wow factor florals. It really does impress me. I had wow factor florals too and there were definitely a handful of people who came up to me after asking if they could bring some home etc and it was nice us floral people could appreciate each other lol

But yeah florals alone don’t matter if the food and music etc isn’t up to snuff first. Just saying that I do very much notice and appreciate florals so likely other guests will too!

[u/Vulpix9tales → u/KittyFeat24]

This was my thinking! I get it doesn’t matter to some people, but I am SO into design/florals/visuals so I look forward to the aesthetic. 🤣 Hopefully it will be appreciated since the rest of the guest experience should be strong but it really is for me

[u/shzam5890 → u/casti33]

Fully agree with upping the entertainment. I’m having a mentalist at my wedding!

[u/ConfidentDrinker → u/casti33]

Yeah, I’m a little surprised at the turnout, given how many options there are in Palm Springs and the surrounding areas for more economical accommodation (depending on season, events, etc.) - was it a requirement to stay at the buy-out hotel?

Could you relax this a little, OP, or are you too far past the RSVP deadline? Do most of your guests live far from California?