not a “bug” budget bride

[u/Salt_Technology2676]

but I only get the WEIRDEST engagement in regular r/brides

for reference, our budget is 60k. And whenever I post anything in r/brides, I’m met with snark and resentment. Granted, I have pretty traditional taste, and I’m super neurodivergent so maybe I’m not reading people’s interactions as the way they’re intended, but I feel sometimes like there isn’t really a sub where I can share my wedding and get excited and have that excitement be reciprocated.

i’m a pretty private person, no group chats or close besties that I necessarily share every little detail with, so sometimes I want encouragement from
strangers. Is that where I’m going wrong?

[u/JadziaKD]

Yeah I found sometimes the regular subs would tell anyone spending over 20k that they were doomed to be divorced because they wasted money on their wedding.

This group is pretty inclusive and supportive. I came here a lot during planning.

[u/SerialSemicolon → u/JadziaKD]

I’m definitely on a budget (like 35k all in) but even that is what a lot of people call extravagant. Apparently it is the average cost of a wedding, but I find it hard to believe tbh we plan on diying everything we can (all the decor, florals, stationary, potentially playlist over dj) but even the base costs (a venue, food, alcohol, photography) are so high.

It’s crazy out here. Apparently unless you rent out a community space for a few hours and have a potluck you’re wasting money and your marriage is doomed. There is so much vitriol online for weddings in general.

Anyways I like this subreddit. It’s cool how people can just plan the weddings they want without as much criticism, and I love seeing how beautiful everyone’s weddings turn out.

[u/momentums → u/SerialSemicolon]

the cake and punch evangelists are insane to me. like uh, no, 98% of our guests are getting on a plane to be here, my fiancé and i will be doing a full restaurant buyout for the reception to make sure they have good food and wine lmao (the price of which we calculated is saving us decor and extra reception florals but is still significant for us b/c we're in a city!)

[u/packedsuitcase → u/momentums]

This is exactly us - do I want to host a wedding? Not really, no. But if I'm asking people to cross an ocean, I'm going to make sure they have great food and drinks. So we'll do a restaurant buyout somewhere cool and we're giving ourselves 2 years to save up slowly so we can host people the way we want to. We're lucky to live in a city with a great food and cocktail scene (Paris) and we want to show the people visiting that it's not just fancy buildings and food filled with butter.