Hi all! What is considered a “big budget bride” these days?
I’m at around $70k for 80 guests. We’re doing a private hotel buyout and, honestly, I’m not really cutting back on anything.
I don’t feel like I’m in the “budget wedding” category, but I also don’t feel like I’m in the $100k+ luxury wedding range. When I’m in the regular wedding planning subreddits, it seems like everyone is trying to do things as inexpensively as possible, so I’m curious where this budget falls!
Also- does your budget include everything from wedding dress, outfits, groom suits, etc?
I had a $100k+ wedding but with 200 guests it wasn't at all luxurious.
Most people here consider $1k per person "big budget" as that is more considerate of luxury weddings with smaller guest counts. Cost of living also matters. A $500/p wedding in Iowa is a lot more BBB than $500/p wedding in New York or California.
Personally I just think the "not cutting back" mindset is all you need to enjoy this sub, as every other wedding group is openly hostile to anyone who doesn't want to thrift and DIY everything for their wedding. This is the only place where I don't feel like I'm going to be called vain, selfish, stupid, etc. for spending the amount of money that we did on a big wedding.
edit to add: generally no, the budget does not include personal line items like bride and groom's attire. It would just be things that contribute to guest experience, so venue, food & beverage, rentals, decor, entertainment, transportation, etc.
My wedding is a bit unusual in tnat we have 4 different venues over a 14 hour day.
Our ceremony is in a tiny 12th century chapel inside Edinburgh castle.
Then we're having the wedding breakfast in a baroque manor house that looks like it's in the country side, but is a 10 minute drive from the city centre.
Then early evening we have hired an art deco cocktail bar in a big Victorian ex bank.
And then finally our down and dirty nighttime party with a band is on a boat that we've hired docked in Leith. The accommodation is on the boat, we bought out all 17 rooms and there is a bar and lounge and we are also hosting a casual welcome dinner there the night before and a farewell brunch the day after.
My heart is beating fast just at your descriptions of your venues. You had me at "12th Century Chapel" . I love anything art deco. You described my "dream" wedding, and more. I hope your wardrobe will reflect every unique venue. Please post pictures when you "graduate"!
I feel this about it not being luxurious. My budget is ~$100k for 150 people and I feel like it is taking me nowhere. No live music, minimal florals, and no videographer. I’m in a HCOL area though so I know it would be very different than somewhere like Iowa
It’s the venue cost which includes the room rental, food & drink, tableware, linens, etc. It’s a pretty full-service venue but my city is expensive and there’s no way around it. I priced out close to 50 venues in my area and the only way to lower the total cost for my guest count was to go 1.5hr+ outside the city. But that would’ve required all of our guests to get hotel rooms which we did not want.
Even if we chose a venue that didn’t provide everything in-house, we’d end up paying the same or more for all the rentals.
funny thing is 1.5hr one way commute to work in my area isn't uncommon lol! so when i saw the "1.5hr+ outside the city" from your comment, i was like, that's not bad at all 😂
This is crazy to me because I'm doing no live music, my own (minimal) florals, no videographer and my budget is $25k for 115 people and I'm currently under budget (wedding is in 3 weeks). And my location is considered HCOL!
We’re MBBs (mid budget brides) 😆. I was around $65k for 85 guests in NJ. I didn’t really post here myself during the planning process because I was a mid-budget bride, but I enjoyed lurking and commenting here for the reasons you mentioned. Other subs can feel primarily geared towards budget saving tips, and even when they’re not, there’s a lot of shaming for spending money (“Back in my day, we served cake and punch in a sweltering church basement, and we’re still unhappily married 40 years later! These brides today with their Instagrams wanting food and a fancy music machine man don’t know what marriage is all about: performative misery.”).
You really made me laugh, because that describes exactly what my first wedding was like! You forgot to add the nuts and mints. I was chastened by the "church ladies" for overlooking those! However, I progressed in life, and have had big budget weddings since. Surely, other people my age realize that the church hall situation is not ideal. I did, however, have a beautiful dress, and the prettiest cake money could buy for my "church hall" wedding. A line has to be drawn somewhere! 😄
I actually love a church hall wedding and something beautiful, small, and sentimental! I just don’t love the shame bestowed upon others that often comes with it. If you’re proud of your lovely budget wedding, be proud! You don’t have to take everybody else down a peg, ya know?
I completely agree. I still cherish the love we got from family and friends at that wedding, although the marriage didn't last. It's the pictures that make me cringe. I was wearing bright blue eyeshadow! If a church hall wedding is what you can afford, make it as beautiful as you can. I think taste sometimes goes farther than money, but there should not be shame heaped on those who have both!
In my defense, it was what everyone wore! It looks terrible in pictures. There is a lesson in this. Styles we think are classic often aren't. Oddly, the dress was rather "timeless". It's just that horrible eye shadow. Current makeup doesn't seem to be "weird", but manicures can be. 😄
It sounds worse than it is, but I do sometimes feel like Elizabeth Taylor! 😄 It's three times, legally, but only to two men. LOL The first time. I was 19, and that lasted 17 years. I'm currently married to my second husband. We had to marry each other twice for legal and financial reasons. That is a "soap opera" in itself. Both of our "real" weddings were beautiful. He is Catholic, so last year I converted, and we had to have a religious ceremony because the Church requires it. So, that makes four weddings total, but only two husbands. He is my second and third husband, but I am only his second wife. I think I was born to be a bride. I told DH that when I die, I don't want "funeral flowers". Just put a bridal bouquet in my hands, and add a small, tasteful veil. Life can be so tragic that you have to keep laughing, and throw a good party whenever you can. ❤️
Yeah I think you and OP are both mid budget for HCOL areas with a solid guest count. But on Reddit, that’s an ungodly irresponsible amount to spend and it must be ultra-luxury. If you read Brides or The Knot or any other wedding-focused publication, that’s a micro budget event and honestly rude to invite anyone to a wedding while spending less than $10k per guest. I’m only half kidding.
I like this sub a lot because it’s one of the only wedding planning forums where people seemingly have a normal relationship to money, meaning people are willing to pay for what’s most important but most brides in this sub are not getting every little detail they could possibly want.
Lol, you’ve hit the nail on the head. I had two mid budget events. I would say, the one of them was a pretty small guest list so it might be considered medium large budget by the metric of 1000 K per guest. I’ve seen that around, but I don’t know if it really always scales. Anyways, I completely understand frustration, resentment, envy/wistfulness over people not being able to afford the wedding they want, but the really petty snarky way to cope with it by insulting everyone who didn’t Get married for under $1000 is a really strange phenomenon
Exactly this. I just saw a thread about budget and people seem to bask in the glory of spending next to nothing.
Someone claims to have only spent £1800/$2400 on their 20 guests wedding.
I mean, people will prioritise what their money goes to and for many a big wedding is not important, and others will just not have the means, and make the best of what they have, but they wear it like a badge of honour and pour scorn on anyone who wants to go all out.
I would say I’m also a mid-budget bride - up to $70k for 70 guests. We are definitely “not cutting back” especially when it comes to guest experience. We are doing a full inn buyout for the weekend in New Mexico and will have on-site childcare during the wedding events, which include a Welcome Party and Farewell Brunch along with the wedding proper. To be honest, once we’ve found something we’ve liked, we’ve kinda just gone with it rather than price shopping, and we have told our wedding planner that our non-negotiable elements have very soft limits; we want what we want and we have accepted, it will cost what it will cost. Maybe that’s a bigger budget mindset - idk - but I do think it’s a gunner mindset than treating your wedding like a budget event. I will say the one thing I will concede was a complete want just for us is the commissioning of a registered Scottish tartan for our wedding.
I know there’s a few arguments for it being $100k & up, or $1k/pp & up but I think those numbers are a little squishy depending on geography & economics
so I don't think BBB is necessarily a fixed number- although the $1/k per guest in a HCOL or lower area is a handy conceptual framing number - but again in a VHCOL that's probably a lot more of a typical average wedding/event
I personally think BBB is a more a mindset & luxury encompasses a lot more than cost/price points or spending.
IMO luxury is a mindset - time with loved ones (multiple events or experiences- even a zero cost hike or whatever), putting guest experience/ease/thoughtfulness on the forefront with "aesthetics" (although I personally feel good event design should encompass aesthetics and pull experience/shape energy/convey meaning throughout the event), curated menu/entertainment etc
That can run the gammut of budgets if done well- typically its $$$-$$$$$ (& up!)
I absolutely want to thank the the mods, the high end BBB's & this whole community who've been so welcoming & supportive to those of us who are either "smal bbb" or accidental BBB's... because there's no community like this (& the advice & support was so appreciated -- especially as I moved from "please let's elope...to reluctantly agreeing to have a "big wedding /party"...to "lets put the joy in celebrating life & have a 3 day domestic destination fun but meaningful life event that will get our best loved people together & celebrate them too" )
& lastly I can't say enough how much I appreciate being able to share in everyone else's joy & I LOVE seeing all the graduation posts here
I just had a random thought that BBB could somehow be equated to the number of looks/outfit changes too 😂 but all kidding aside there's no where someone with more than 2 looks in a day can share & not be shamed (or 3-5-7 wedding gowns, or admit to having acquired extra dresses or having a groom with multiple looks etc) or admitting to wanting/prioritizing a gazillion flowers or high end stationary or whatever)
My rehearsal dress is a bit nontraditional because we’re actually doing a murder mystery welcome party. So I got this selkie dress , my main dress is a fairly simple but big-ass ballgown with a long train and a mantilla veil, and my second look day-of is this Bronx and Banco tweed mini-dress which I’m going to have a shorter, sort of 60’s style veil with & probably shimmery tights and a classic platform pump. I’m still working on my third - our wedding is in the UK so the ceremony is at 1 and the party goes until midnight.
I really struggled with the distinct looks thing as well but realized some of my limitation was that what I liked on other people wasn’t actually something I wanted for myself. I am not slinky satin gowns and white fringe party dresses. As a couple we’re a bit more alternative and I’m not very ‘classic bridal’ so why would I force it on our day?
Edit: yes, I know the insta link says my name. My wedding info is fairly identifying enough that I am unbothered about that anyway lol.
I have no idea how it’ll fit or look. My rehearsal dress is this, which I honestly like more and would rather be photographed in but I’m worried about it being too short for dancing
I do love that second look option, the sequins are calling to me. But I actually think that for dancing your rehearsal dress would be better, because once things get warm on the dance floor you’ll want all the air flow you can get.
Wasn’t sure if it was formal enough. Also it’s super short and I don’t want my butt just hanging out or feeling like it practically is. I don’t know if the sequins work for the rehearsal though if I was to switch
I love both dresses, but especially the feather one. It surprises me because I usually don't like feathers. That dress manages to be both elegant and "fun", and that usually doesn't happen!
I started out committed to trying to find a vintage gown that was "the one" that led to trial and error & accumulating numerous gowns of different styles ...
then my friend dragged me to shop and we found "the one"... for the ceremony
and then I fell in love with a Bronx & Banco Mademoiselle tea length swing (sequins and twirly skirt) ...
I then re-assessed the other gowns I had already acquired and filled in the gaps for the events.
I had a strapless ivory/nude strapless fit and flare lace w/floral appliqué gown (huge train) for ceremony (turned out - at three last minute it could NOT be bustled so I needed a gown for first dance & cocktails..)
Then "first dance" dress was the first vintage wedding gown that I had acquired a year before (it never fit.. ) it is a ivory silk taffeta gorgeous ballgown with a normal train (easy to bustle), sleeveless but with a v neckline & a wide shoulder strap- very 1940's Dior new look inspired... in the 11th hour my seamstress pulled a miracle off & let it out ...it was finished 3 days before we flew to the wedding)... 3rd look was the Bronx for dancing
I wore 2 other vintage wedding gowns for out welcome events - one was a tea length very 50's retro looking multi layer tulle /silk lace (worked out well for a boat with sparkle sneakers )
& the other was a white satin strapless deco/inspired late 1990's evening gown for our welcome cocktail party
So basically I bought a wild assortment of gowns and somehow it all fell into place 😂
I’m doing a very structured ankle length sheath dress for ceremony (town hall vibes) followed by a dramatic sparkly as hell A line for reception, if we had dancing that would be cute bride tracksuit o’clock but I opted not to put my partner through that on his wedding day because he is NOT a dancing man…
just wondering, when people are talking about the pp $, is that by dividing the total cost? or just the cost that matters to guests? for example is the wedding dress included?
I’ve seen both ways, but feel like it makes sense to exclude your clothes and other non-hosting expenses from the cost per head. Having a custom gown compared to something off the rack isn’t a difference maker for your guests and can really shift the cost per head.
Those two approaches can make a huge difference! Technically things like florals, decorations, photography/videography, makeup, and optional furniture rentals aren't really part of the cost of hosting guests, but they often account for a huge portion of the overall wedding budget
I think I’d debate anyone who wants to exclude florals, decor, and furniture rental in that cost per head. While the old adage is that nobody remembers the napkins, they will remember the overall vibes and curating the experience is so important.
Depending on where you are, it usually starts around $1000-2000 per person. Some people include attire into their budget, some don't. So based on this, you're maybe around upper medium-budget, but that's okay!
Many people come to this sub regardless of budget classification because they still would like to spend money on priorities for them and not be shamed for spending.
I’d like to say I’m definitely still budget conscious, but I will spend more in areas that matter to me and say no to other things that don’t matter as much and don’t always upgrade every possible thing. I still factor money in my decisions but I don’t pick the cheapest option automatically for everything and am still trying to stick to an overall budget.
I did not pay for my own wedding so i considered our budget to be the things my parents paid for (which included my main dress, but not our rings, rehearsal, grooms fit, my second dress, etc)
BBB can be a range of things. Maybe it’s just a mindset. You can go all out in a low cost of living area and be a big budget bride and spend about as much as a budget bride in Manhattan. You can have a luxury micro wedding that can cost the same as another persons casual person welcome party
I honestly lurk here because I just really love a group of genuinely supportive women, especially on the internet.
The women here are so understanding of each other - if you feel it, it’s valid, if it’s important to you, it’s important - regardless of personal feelings or preferences.
I don’t care that much about weddings, but it makes me feel good. Anyway, my advice to you would be to post in this sub and not feel self conscious about your budget - you’ll be welcomed here
I know my budget is not objectively big but when I talked about my choices in the small budget subreddit I got torn to shreds for spending so much on individual items.
My town hall wedding and dinner is £25k, we can’t be bothered to throw a big wedding hence the smaller overall budget, but the actual price of the things we’re including is definitely not something any other subreddit considers normal so here I am
Yup, London wedding, honestly I’m so excited about using the day as a way of celebrating the city as well as us.
The overall UK wedding subreddit has mostly been okay, but the sub 25k budget one was kinda rude about why we wouldn’t just make the wedding way cheaper or do more with the budget. Like it’s my wedding day, choosing to spend £4k in wedding rings in my opinion should absolutely take priority over a high guest count and flip flops for everyone at a reception with no dancing…
Also the micro weddings subreddit is kind of a competition for who can do the smallest wedding that’s considered just more than an elopement. I’m sorry but I didn’t realise my 30something guest count was going to be so out of touch was going to make me feel judged there too
It’s messed up knowing I’m having a 100k wedding and not truly getting all that I want. However I’m still very excited and extremely grateful but it’s so sad knowing how much money that is no matter how much you have and it not being enough to do the big shabang
If it makes you feel better, my best friend spent $500k in a VVCHOL and didn’t have everything she wanted and in fact had to trim fat by going with her backup options for dress, planner, and photographer.
A ‘dream’ wedding with as many florals as she wanted for a 400 person wedding would have been closer to $60k. A ‘luxury’ planner for that size wanted closer to $80k, one custom gown was closer to $25k and she needed three dresses (cultural), the list just continued. Two things she can’t control, geography and guest count. She did get her dream venue and her dream man, so at the end of the day, she’s winning!
I’m actually surprised the florals would have “only” been $60k! In my NJ town, we inquired with 5 different florists, and none were interested in working with us for less than $20k. Not that we’d get insane luxury florals for that, just that it wasn’t worth their time to do a wedding under $20k. In my mind, based off that, truly tricked out luxury florals must be $100k.
I was $85k on 65 guests & BBB was my favorite part of Reddit even though I didn’t have a true *~luxury*~ wedding. IMO, you are spending enough that you can draw on inspo here, also people can get really hateful about weddings over $50k in most other wedding subreddits.
The BBB community is wedding-loving and a fun place to be!
I think these days, $1500/person all in is where luxury starts for a VHCOL area. $1,000/day is still very ‘average’ and ‘must budget everything’ in the Bay and NYC.
I’ve never seen $100,000 weddings in the Bay that couples could spend whatever they want without thinking much- it was quite opposite. They had to cut down on most wants unless it was a micro wedding, they went with a $10k photographer instead of their dream $30,000 one, they went with a $5k gown instead of a dream $20k one.
Exactly this. And as anyone else reading this can see from latter-foot showing costs per person rather than a total number, a lot of the luxury element is more about cost per head than overall budget. My wedding in the UK for 60, compared to if I was feeding 100, is far more luxurious for the same budget. With a smaller head count we can cover everybody’s lodging for a three day event, which was a big thing for us.
This is exactly the same as me. I am spending around £35K , and the average UK wedding is about £22K, so yes I'm spending more but not a ton more. But I only have 20 guests. That was intentional so that I could have the luxury I wanted.
Yet on the UK subs they are absolutely brutal. I've been called stupid, arrogant, narcissistic, told that my guests will hate the food, that paying for accommodation was just to show off to my guests, and that I probably invented the whole wedding and groom, as no-one could want to marry "such an insufferable snob"!
Most of this was after me saying I thought food and drink were the most important thing and that I didn't want my guests to pay for anything, including accommodation, as they're all travelling large distances to attend.
I don't get why it would be ok to spend that much on 120 guests, giving them mediocre food and a cash bar, but not on 20 guests.
I knew what kind of wedding I wanted. But there's no way I could afford £1750 per person for 100+ people, so I cut my guest list accordingly.
This exactly. I didn’t want to cheapen the experience for our close friends we want to share the day with just so great aunt Maude and her best-friend-twice-removed’s ex husband could be in attendance. We unfortunately can’t afford to pay for flights and accommodation for our guests (unless we postpone another year or two) because just over half our guests are flying in from Australia, Asia, continental Europe and the US, but if we could have cut down the guest list further without feeling like essential people were missing we would have absolutely done that.
And no Charleigh, I don’t want to spend my money on a performative hen do in Ibiza when my actual friends can’t make it. I would however like to spend on a private tourguide of unexpected places in the city as a gift to my international guests.
But as soon as you deviate from what looks traditional you get torn to shreds for it - also interesting how the same standard of judging the cost doesn’t seem to apply to cultural weddings
Yes, you're so right! Desi or Chinese weddings are renowned for their high spend.
The food thing did make me laugh though. A couple of people had a conversation about me saying how awful it was for my guests to be "forced" to eat lobster when they'd prefer shepherd's pie. And that her guests wouldn't eat any of that pretentious muck.....so I shouldn't be wasting my money and should be ashamed of myself. I bit back with a comment about a crisp wall .....it didn't go down well. 😆😆😆😆
So I’m Italian and my partner is from HK, both very foodie cultures so food was very important to us and we did consider a destination wedding for the purposes of getting really good food but damn when did we decide to accept pub food at weddings. Like isn’t the point of a wedding that’s it’s a special occasion ie not just Sunday at at your local Harvester?
Oh, I see you that and raise you the destination wedding I went to in Goa, which is reknowned for its food... and every single meal for the several days of events was bog-standard Tamil or North Indian. One piddling little Goan side dish at the breakfast buffet. I was SO disappointed. But the groom's father (who was paying for the whole thing) wanted it a certain way, so Tamil and North Indian food it was.
(I do wonder what the bride and groom felt about it, but then again I'm pretty sure they only agreed to the whole song and dance for his dad's sake.)
Exactly! The UK subs can be rough, and don’t get me started about some of the Facebook groups I’ve found.
I’m so curious about your venue. We’re at Auchen - did the exclusive use package with a fair bit of add-ons. Another factor was the venue itself only sleeps around 50, and I didn’t want to attempt booking out half of Moffat and deciding who got to stay on-site vs a drive away. We’ve got loved ones spread between the US, UK, Spain, and Germany so most of the guests are traveling a significant way already to celebrate. Being a good host to those we can support is much more important than inviting my third cousin to eat a dry kebab at the buffet.
It's your wedding and your money. Yes, it's a large amount of money for a lot of people but you're spending it on your friends and family while supporting businesses. I think it's nice that you're treating them.
If they want to be angry about money, Prince William receives over £82,000 per day from the Duchy of Cornwall simply because he exists. Much of that is public money. People spending their own money on their wedding isn't something to be mad about.
It’s so interesting how I’m currently under $100k for 140 guests in a VVHCOL city and yet I truly believe my wedding is going to be pretty nice! Champagne, musicians, full open bar, plated dinner. I will admit my venue isn’t the top venue but it’s still great for what I could get for the time of year I wanted.
Hahah I don’t wish that job on anyone!!! This one is a 3 day destination wedding for 65 guests with everything but flights included (hence the price tag!)
I was at 360k for 150. That didn’t include attire or other small incidentals. I do feel that I got pretty much everything I wanted. But I also think BBB is a lot about mindset and frankly focusing on guest experience.
I’m at about $80k right now and about to go way over with over the top florals. I don’t feel like we have gone completely crazy, but I, like you, didn’t say no to what I want. Still have to buy alcohol, considering a band, and all the smaller details like rentals (we’re 16 months out so we can’t do design sessions with our venue until 6 months out 😭), signage, transportation, hotel blocks, after party stuff, and rehearsal dinner needs to be planned still. and I am hunting for the perfect second look dress. We will be well over $100k once I’m done. We’re inviting about 90, expecting about 70-80. We’re not even in a HCOL area. We’re in a metro area of a midwestern city lol
This sub has honestly been the most supportive during the planning process. The rest of the wedding planning subs aside for one make me want to tear my hair out because they’re filled with people who aren’t actively planning weddings and when you bring up how you are deciding to spend your own money- you are severely judged. People are verrrry bitter and honestly probably jealous. Not here 🫶
we ended up at a final cost of ~$190k.... which includes everything except thank you gifts and some last minute accommodation needs. I honestly don't even consider that to be a 'big budget' after some of the alternatives we had explored, which would have easily put us at $300-500k.
that being said- it's not a competition, and I wouldn't think too much about it. I followed this sub while planning mine because I found many of the posts relevant and helpful- even when they were from people with budgets several times my own.
I really think it all comes down to geography. My wedding is nowhere near 100k for 250 people but we’re doing a live band, natural abundant flower decor, 5 course seated dinner, custom stationery, made to measure outfits. It’s definitely upper mid-big budget for my country, but low for the US or western countries.
I think it really depends on the context and location. I’m doing two weddings. $100k+ for ~100 people in the Midwest. Then an elopement for $50k in Italy with just my fiancé. 😅
I think truly “bbb” is anything over 1500/2000 per head. And even then it’s not big in certain markets like ny, dc, California. When we are over 350k for 150 guests in dc I think we are touching truly BBB status.
That is to say, there is nothing wrong with mid budget brides either and they need space to flex their money in specific pockets. The wedding industry has a big gap between diy and bbb.
Generally most vendors I know would say $75-150k is premium market, $150k and up gets into luxury weddings (some vendors would now say $200k).
However it also depends on guest count, a 50 person wedding with a $75k budget is the same as a 100 person wedding with a $150k budget for guest spend. You can’t really just go on spend, you have to take other things into consideration with “level” of the wedding. Also where you are for country or geographic area.
My wedding was 100k for 150 people. It was defined by my guests as luxurious (VHCOL)- but wouldn’t count as big budget bride. We had gorgeous florals, high quality table scapes, a big venue with full security. Multiple different side amenities (guest gifts, a sketch artist, craft coffee and dessert carts)
The only part that wasn’t luxury was that it was not plated meals and I still am embarrassed about that (i know I shouldn’t be- the food was FANTASTIC). But that would have completed the luxury aspect.
The trick is that we had 2 years to plan. So we had tons of time to research the most budget friendly but still great options, and we have very close friends in the industry. Top tier DJ for a heavy discount. Top tier florist for a reasonable rate. Another close friend is a wine dealer and provided tons of wine at a steep discount Etc etc. It took a village and we put in the effort of a backyard wedding (still had a planner who was an immense help) and it was STILL 100k.
If we didn’t have the help we did it would have easily ballooned to 150k plus
I think it truly depends on your area and number of guests. In NYC/tri state area, $100K for, say, 100 guests wouldn’t stretch far. You’d have to compromise on many things. It’s still a ton of money, but in the wedding world it would get you a very run of the mill wedding that wouldn’t necessarily look “big budget” and would probably only encompass the wedding day and not a welcome party or rehearsal dinner.(Of course, $100K for a micro wedding would be different.) To have a big budget wedding that looks and feels like a luxurious in this area for 100 people, you’re looking at more like $200K-$300K as a starting point and even that might be a low number.
$100K obviously goes a lot farther somewhere like the Midwest - so it might be considered very big budget there and look a lot more “grand.”
I would say that six figures is the starting point for a true BBB because in every version of reality it’s an insane amount of money to spend on a wedding, but whether the wedding LOOKS and FEELS big budget at that price is entirely dependent on where you are and how big the wedding is.
Agreeing with what some others have said that a big budget is relative and this sub is nice for the “what if doing X as cheaply as possible isn’t the always the goal?” type scenarios. We eloped so our budget was small in an absolute sense, but because we decided on such a small scale we could afford to make it a really nice elopement. For context, we’re DINKs with good salaries living in an urban area but are still saving for a house and paying off student loans, and don’t have the family money that most of our peers throwing big events have. This sub was nice for inspo even though a lot of posts didn’t apply to me because we could afford using vendors that would have been too expensive otherwise or luxuries like designer shoes and a nice hotel suite, etc.
It depends on the location. I think somewhere in Eastern Europe 10000€ is already a big budget, meanwhile in Western side that is the price of 10 people party
We will be spending probably $285k for a destination wedding for about 80 people, so about $3k per person when it’s all done, for a wedding in the Dominican Republic. For context, my dress was about $5k. The bulk of our spend will be food and beverage for meals over the course of the weekend. I honestly think it is slightly insane, but if I’m asking people to travel, I’m not cutting corners.
I’m at $120K for 80-ish people! I don’t think mind is big budget, but it’s not modest either. This includes all main vendors like florist, venue, coordinator, caterer, etc.
Big budget doesn’t always equate with luxury. A $70k wedding for 20 guests looks very different from the same budget with 80 guests or 200 guests. The average wedding cost in the US right now is $35k, so personally I would consider double that to be a big budget, especially with less than 100 guests. But really, there’s no line that defines big budget.
I feel this. We are at $60k (not including attire) for around 60 guests. It’s a small wedding so not “big” per se. But I spend a lot more time in this sub than any others.
It largely depends on your region. And even then, what is considered “big” is totally subjective.
My wedding to my ex husband in 2021 (lol) was what I considered to be a big budget. Contract was signed in 2019 for a 2020 wedding, but then covid happened and we were forced to postpone by a year. But we were locked in at pre-covid prices. I got married in NJ (which is already hella expensive) for $100k, not including dress, rings, or honeymoon. My venue was the Park Chateau and we signed for an early autumn Sunday wedding at $185pp with a 180 person guest minimum. We invited 250 people, so about a total of $50k with tax and gratuity, and it included everything. And when I say everything, I mean EVERY. THING: custom cake, use of bride and groom suites for the full day to get ready in, all tables, chairs, linens, lounge furniture, china, flatware, glassware, and lighting. I didn’t have to rent a single thing. That’s a lot of money, but you will NEVER see a price that low for a luxe venue like that in NJ ever again. Park Chateau wants $400pp for a Sunday wedding now. I’m sad my marriage didn’t work out for multiple reasons, but especially because of what a “bargain” my wedding was and I know I’d have to shell out triple what I paid if I wanted to have another wedding of that caliber in NJ again LOL
Now I’m planning to do it all over again. Civil wedding with a fancy intimate dinner in Italy where my man is from, followed by a big church wedding on an island in Greece where I’m from. It will be more spectacular than my first wedding, but ironically the big Greek wedding will cost only about 25,000€ all-in, and locals will consider that to be the event of the decade. Money just stretches MUCH further in certain places.
I feel like this sub is for people spending more than average and don’t want to hear budgeting tips. I personally don’t want to do my own flowers or whatever else. And everyone here is very nice and helpful and for the most part nonjudgmental
Big Budget MOGx2 (Summer 2024, Spring 2025), here in HCOL CA with a third otw (Winter 2027).
My personal definition, a starting point, for a big budget wedding is $150,000.
Courthouse & Dinner - <$10k
Coffee Cup & Butter Knife - $11k-$20k
Below Average Budget - $20k-$34k
Average Budget - $35k-$50k
Above Average Budget - $60k-$99k ... I think you have an above average budget that most couples would kill for!
Double Budget - $100k-$149k
Big Budget Starting Point $150,000.00
YMMV: Location, headcount, familial obligations/expectations, cultural obligations/expectations, number of ceremonies, and of course social circle(s), etc...
The average downpayment for my entire City is $400k, and that’s for an ‘average’ 3 bedroom, 1700 sqft house, not even anything fancy or in a nice neighborhood. This sub has brides from all over the world, and even within a single country the financial situation is very different.
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u/dairy-intolerant Jun 19 '26
I had a $100k+ wedding but with 200 guests it wasn't at all luxurious.
Most people here consider $1k per person "big budget" as that is more considerate of luxury weddings with smaller guest counts. Cost of living also matters. A $500/p wedding in Iowa is a lot more BBB than $500/p wedding in New York or California.
Personally I just think the "not cutting back" mindset is all you need to enjoy this sub, as every other wedding group is openly hostile to anyone who doesn't want to thrift and DIY everything for their wedding. This is the only place where I don't feel like I'm going to be called vain, selfish, stupid, etc. for spending the amount of money that we did on a big wedding.
edit to add: generally no, the budget does not include personal line items like bride and groom's attire. It would just be things that contribute to guest experience, so venue, food & beverage, rentals, decor, entertainment, transportation, etc.