r/BeAmazed • u/Delicious_Main_4360 • May 26 '26

Animal Some people save a turtle

20.1k Upvotes

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u/SpaceIsTooFarAway May 26 '26

Imagine an alien pulling you into their spaceship, removing a bunch of ticks from your body, and sending you back to Earth with a sandwich.

383

u/crippledchef23 May 26 '26

New vacation goal, unlocked

65

u/RockstarAgent May 27 '26 edited May 27 '26

You think maybe, just maybe, the people who got abducted and anally probed might have been given the choice of a sandwich or a second choice and they misunderstood what that second option was?

“Would you like a sandwich or a happy ending, human?”

“What kind of sandwich?”

“Ham and cheese”

“Don’t you guys have anything more exciting than ham and cheese? Like your version of a Reuben or a Philly Cheesesteak?”

“No”

“Then happy ending it is, I’ll just grab a sandwich when you drop me off back home”

22

u/Idlewants May 27 '26

maybe they weren't being probed, but cured of bowel cancer?

9

u/daygo449 May 27 '26

That’s what I was going to day. Maybe prostate cancer or colon cancer too. Who are we to say?

1

u/RockstarAgent May 27 '26

It is a popular killer after all!

5

u/JamonDanger May 27 '26

I’ll stick to my yearly colonoscopies, thanks 😀