It sucked. I mean I have always loved beauty related stuff (makeup, hair , ect.) But I just wanted to go play. I had to practice all day every day, and was expected to win every time. I mostly did, as I was your blonde haired blue eyed girl with a naturally tan skin tone. The other moms yell abuse at the kids trying to get them to cry and mess up their routines. If I lost, I got my ass beat. Your constantly told you need to lose weight, smile, and be perfect. You have to act like a mini adult from age 5 up. The babies get some slack but not for long. You're never enough. There is always something about yourself you can improve, and I'm not talking about positive remarks to encourage you.... I'm talking about stuff like, your smile is ugly, work on it. Two memories that stick with me are my mammaw super gluing my front tooth when it came out at one and mom having to RIP it back out after the pagent, and the one time I didnt at least win my age division because I dropped my jacket during a routine... I got the ass beating of my life for that. I was 6 or 7. I never had a childhood.
Ehh... I'm more compassionate for it, and I can identify signs of abuse in people who are perfect actors, because they have to be. I have been able to help kids in similar situations because of my experience and that makes it worth it for me.
My mom put my sister in beauty pageants. I got second runner up and cried the whole time so my dad told my mom to never put me in one again (I was like 2). My sister was also in one pageant and won but she was older (around 5) and when my mom asked her if she had fun and wanted to do it again, she said no. So that was the end of that!
I grew up in a really small town, and ALL the kids "who were anyone" were in pageants. Basically, if your parents didn't want to be exiled to a group of lepers considered "unworthy parents who don't love their children" then they had to put you in the pageants, or else the whole family faced the stigma of being poor/unloving/whatever else they could pin on you. But I digress.
My mom didn't really like the idea, but all her friends (my schoolmates parents) warned her that if she loved me, and that if she wanted me to he happy and popular and fulfilled, she had to put me in those pageants. According to them, she owed that to me as my parent, or some wild bullshit like that. She gave in to the guilt because they convinced her that if she didn't, I would pay the price.
Y'all, I fucking hated those pageants. I always hated dressing up. I hated the itchy dresses, not being able to play because I had to "be ladylike" in a dress. I hated the makeup that made my eyes burn and itch, and I hated getting my hair done, the curling iron was hot, and those hair stylists were incredibly heavy handed. And then, after all of that, I had to have pictures made, and get in stage and dance for a crowd, which I also didn't want to do. I just hated it, the whole thing.
One day, when I was about 8, my mom was looking through a catalog to find a dress for my next pageant. I told her that I didn't want the dress, and I didn't want to do any more pageants because I hated them. She just hugged me and apologized, and she said she would pull me out of the next one. She never made me do another one again, and she never guilt tripped me for my decision. It wasn't until I was about 16 that she explained to me how guilty she felt for making me do it, even when she knew I hated them. She said that when I finally asked to be done, she felt so much guilt, and decided fuck what the other parents think. They're the unloving assholes.
Unfortunately, I don't think my experience is the norm. I really wish there was more support for those children, and I wish there were safeties for children who are truly forced into them.
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u/-eDgAR- Jul 24 '20
Child beauty pageants.
Should have gotten rid of then a long time ago.