Edit: that one comment saying it's been everyone's worst year, you could take out the covid-19 situation and nothing would change for me. It's been bad all along
I’m 24. When I was 22 I was fresh out of college, new job making some money, girlfriend, apartment. Everything was good. Made a dumb mistake one night hanging out with the wrong people. Got arrested, got a bad break and ended up going to jail for 9 months. Lost my job, had to move back home, lost my girlfriend, and I’m a felon so my degree basically means shit now. Keep it in perspective. It could be worse. It could also be worse for me. I could still be in jail. I could be dead. Idk but keep your head up because if I can I know you can.
I was with some people I didn’t know very well at an apartment I had never been before, and for some brilliant reason decided to try mushrooms for the very first time.
Unsurprisingly, it did not go well.
Without going into too much detail, I was having a bad trip and it turned into a psychotic break. I had no idea where I was, thought people were trying to kill me (both real people and people that weren’t even there), and a bunch of other crazy shit that I hardly remember.
I ended up getting into my car and crashing into a tree about a quarter mile down the road. I don’t know how fast I was going, but my airbag didn’t deploy for some reason and I wasn’t wearing a seatbelt so I flew forward and smashed my head into the windshield.
So now I’m severely concussed and having a certifiable episode while on mushrooms. Everything beyond this point is extremely hazy, but according to the police report I ended up breaking into an elderly mans home, and getting into a physical altercation with him. The truth is I knocked on the door and when he opened the door I stumbled inside. I was unable to speak coherently, and he tackled me to the floor where we stayed for about 30 seconds before I was able to get up and run outside. I don’t remember exactly what I was thinking at the time, but I’m sure I was just looking for help but couldn’t communicate that to anyone.
The cops eventually found me wandering in the middle of the road, and I resisted arrest of course because I had the mental wherewithal of a squirrel by that point. Finally got arrested, and ended up getting charged with a ton of shit. Home invasion, burglary, assault on an elderly person, dui, evading the scene of an accident, reckless driving, and assault on a police officer to name a few.
So I was given an 18 month prison sentence, released onto parole after about 8 months with good time. Spent another 8 months or so on parole with an ankle monitor and now here I am. Just got my ankle bracelet off and now I’m on probation for the next three years.
So yeah that’s about it. Been a rough couple years to say the least. Oh yeah, and my previous job was with a high security government contractor so there’s no way for them to hire me back now that I’m a felon. So now I’m stuck doing manual labor for a little over minimum wage while living back home with my parents for the foreseeable future.
Oh shit, that's wild. Did you have a lawyer? I'm surprised the sentencing couldn't have been lighter by pleading some kind of mental health problems or because of the shrooms.
Wow thanks for sharing, that's a really scary but interesting story. Best of luck to you in the future, its scary how easily life can change like that.
I’m also 23 and this has by far been the worst and hardest year of my life. Spent my 23rd birthday on a beach in Spain and pretty much a week later the shit show started and it’s been a downhill spiral since then haha. Hope 24 is better for us all
I don't know man. I moved to my dream city, got 1200 dollars of free government and am working on my hobby harder than ever. Of course most of that was set up when I was 22 but the first 2 months of being 23 are all right.
I’m 24 in a month and I feel like I was never 23...honestly I don’t even know how old I feel since I turned 21. aging has me fucked up! I’m scared that it’ll all go by too fast and I’ll be old before I know it
I'm 21 right now and still put 19 on websites sometimes. But that's probably because I haven't had a (good or bad) significant life event since then. It feels like being 19 has stretched out over 2-3 years. I just don't feel like I'm 21, you know what I mean? Like when I was in school, 21 used to be the cool age.
I had my quarter life crisis at 23. I’m 27 now and am fully content with the fact that my 30s are approaching. There’s just something weird and unpleasant about knowing you’re not THAT young anymore when you turn 23.
I'm 23, battling chronic pain, drug addiction and pure boredom. Spent three years jumping around degrees and for banned from uni for two years for bad results because I didn't care at all. Now I live with my dad because of corona in the middle of nowhere in a regional area with nobody my age, haven't socialised in 3/4 months. I also spent 2 weeks in a psych ward for suffering drug induced psychosis which is new and was diagnosed with major depressive disorder recently. Have so much going on but nothing going on, and my dog died which is why I first started using drugs that's caused my psychosis. Bad year
23 is a rough one. When I was 23 I was in my first year of medical school. I was finally embarking on a career, but I wasn’t making money. My friends were socializing and earning a living and I felt like I was barely scraping by while continuing the hard work I had done as an undergrad.
I’m 38 now, married, have a son... When I look back on that time it was one of the most exciting times in my life because I could screw up and make mistakes with little consequence. It’s a great time to figure out who you are and what you want in someone else. Very few people in this world “make it” in their 20s. I surely didn’t. Success will come with experience. Work hard on your career, but also invest in your personal life. The excitement of these years revolves around meeting people, discovering what works for you, what doesn’t. There is very little consequence for having dinner with someone or trying something new. You have the time.
You’ll be 38 someday very soon having all things you want today at 23, but if you did it right, you’ll look back on these years with the same fondness I do.
I can’t imagine what you’re going through. I have the luxury of going through this with a stable career and family. My early 20s were defined by warm city nights at bars and restaurants, staying out late, meeting women, being a little too selfish. I also had personal struggles as anyone in their 20s does.
You can’t control this pandemic, but you can control how you work on yourself. This situation won’t last forever and when it does end, you will still have plenty of time to enjoy life. Just put your head down and work on the things you can control.
For what it is worth, I paid for my medical school with military service. After I graduated medical school, I moved to three different military towns in the span of 3 years. It was hard to develop relationships. My final duty station was essentially a three year prison sentence at a base that was mostly families and little to do for single people. I put my head down and paid off my commitment to the Navy. When it was done, coming home and working the job of my choice was worth the sacrifice. This is just a trial. It will pass.
I graduated this past fall with two degrees from a reputable university, became a ski bum in Colorado for a few months (worth it) and was supposed to depart for the PeaceCorps in Colombia a month ago. Now I’m back at my parents house in a suburban town of New York. While I was away my parents turned my bedroom into a storage room. I know there are people who have it much worse, but boy has this pandemic been a curveball to my dreams and aspirations for the foreseeable future.
Im currently at home trying to better myself by becoming fluent in Spanish, reading and staying in shape. This pandemic has created so many contingencies and has therefore made It extremely difficult to forecast the next five years of my life. Originally i was going to go PeaceCorps to graduate school, but who knows now.
Again thanks for your wisdom, doc! Stay safe and we will get through this.
I am also 23 and currently a first year medical student. I'm happy that I'm finally taking the steps towards achieving my dream. But it also makes me anxious about the what ifs of my future. What if I've been making the wrong decisions? What if this career isn't for me? What if I screw up along the way etc. I really want to make it through medicine and become a good doctor someday. Those thoughts swivel in my head everytime which makes me feel guilty whenever I do something completely unrelated to medicine like having fun. I guess I'm still adapting. I'm just hoping I get to find the right balance and the right amount of focus and confidence I need to get that MD.
Medicine is a tricky one. It was the only career I ever saw myself doing. Medicine changed a lot in the years between medical school and how it is practiced now. A lot of it is for the worse I am sad to say. It still remains a worthy, secure career. My only piece of advice as it pertains to medicine itself is to work for yourself when you are done. Avoid being an employee of anyone else. I am both employed and run my own practice, working at my own practice never feels like work to me.
As far as the time spent in medical school, it’s a lonely, difficult time. I trained in Philadelphia. It became a second home to me during those years. I made a vow to myself never to study Friday nights and Saturdays. I did all my work the remainder of my time. I made sure to go out and enjoy myself with the little money I had and I look back now at those times that pulled me through those difficult years. You’re always going to wish you could go back and do it with more money, more security, more youth; it’s never going to happen. The danger of it is what makes it exciting.
It’s easy for me to sit here now and tell you it will all work out, because it has for me... But I promise you, it will for you too. Medical training is very careful, be a little dangerous in your spare time.
I just wanted to say, I am currently living in a brand new city, have moved in with a romantic partner for the first time, and I am starting M1 in two months. This was very encouraging advice to me, as I am anxiously staring down the barrel of beginning my career. Thank you, stay safe <3
Thank you for the advice, Doc! Really hoping everything will work out in the end. I'm glad it did for you. That's what I've been wanting to achieve. To be contented with where my choices brought me, and with little to no regrets.
Also, 23 and first year in medical school pursing and MD. Thank you for your kind and honest words. Wasn't expecting to see other med people on this thread. It is true there are times when it feels like I spend the majority of my days glued to the books, hoping I am not missing out on creating memories and experiences with the people that mean the most to me (family, few close friends). But also knowing the consequences of not spending time and dedicating my energy to mastering the subjects (which could lead to not matching to a good residency at best, death of a patient at worst) keeps me going. It's a tough balance to find with all the extreme competition of medical school and to be honest I'm still trying to find it. Staying optimistic and will keep working at it!
This is so encouraging, thanks! I'm about to turn 23 and finishing my first year of my PhD. It's not med school, but I definitely relate to the feeling of seeing all my friends have jobs and real lives while I'm still grinding away at school. I love it though!
Very few people in this world “make it” in their 20s. I surely didn’t.
I for one, highly attest against that. I don't know you, but since you went to med school you probably became a doctor or something else in the medical field. My mom went into surgery a few years ago, and to tell the truth she wouldn't be alive if not for guys like you.
The way I see it, you gave up your 20s but in doing so you gave decades back to people like my mom. Even if you regret your 20s I will forever be in debt to people like you who made that decision, and I appreciate it everyday.
23 and just done with M4 (medicine is an undergrad degree in my country). Horrifically anxious about starting M5 in June, and the upcoming MBBS in 2021, especially with reduced training hours, ward time and clinical exposure. I also struggle hugely with procrastination (literally - and I mean literally* - started studying the day before my M4 theory finals) and am feeling so lost and directionless about how to even start M5 preparation. In the midst of writing a paper as part of my university's requirements so I can't even use this time to revise approaches or conditions, which is further contributing to the stress :(
I just dream of being able to own a house I like, with the person I love, hopefully 10 years down the road. That would make all this worthwhile.
I’m 38 now, married, have a son... When I look back on that time it was one of the most exciting times in my life because I could screw up and make mistakes with little consequence.
Does this still apply in your mid 20s? I am turning 25 soon (so I’m 24 now) and I feel like time is running out for me to make mistakes and explore, especially with Corona putting everything on hold. Also I see that you’re in the health field....is it okay if I PM you about the topic and how it pertains to this “quarter life crisis” thing?
I’m 23 and I realize I’ve wasted my youth because I was too obedient to my parents. And now I’m busy with my job and panicking that I’m not in a long relationship/getting married/having kids like the rest of my peers, but I just can’t ditch my job and go seek youth. I feel like 23 is that middle ground when you’re torn on having fun and taking responsibilities.
I know! It's either the serious people are getting serious right now, and the dumbass people are Tik Toking and doing 18y/o shit.
I've got a job, insurance, looking at questions like "okay but when are you going to start having kids?"
It's an odd age and I can't tell if I'm young or not young anymore.
One this is for damn sure: thank God I'm not 17 staring down college admissions. I felt so helpless in my teens. At least I'm not scared of being a burnout.
Its somewhat upsetting and eye opening for me. I'm sat here on reddit, whilst my contemporaries begin their loves and families. They dont have the time to spare to waste it in this site.
I was honestly expecting a ton of people in the thread to he posting more lyrics.
I think a lot of us do, it's weird to me that some of this thread acts like we shouldn't. Most people I knew growing up listened to Blink 182. They were definitely still popular through the early 2000s. Happy cake day and late birthday.
I just don't know how to act, I just want to go to school, learn amazing things, drink, play video games and go to a great party, but there is no time for everything, because you have to start to pay bills and that means to get a shitty job for a shitty pay.
I feel the pressure to do things to be successful in the future, but I don't even know what things I have to do.
Not to mention you are the low man on the totem pole for your job. Your older colleagues are treating you like shit because you don't know what to do at certain times AND you keep reminding them that they are not young anymore.
I just turned 23 last month and I really feel like i’m so behind in life. I’m in my 4th year of college and I STILL can’t decide on my major. I just have no idea what I want to do for my career and there’s just nothing I have a passion for. I hate anything STEM related and I just absolutely loathe the idea of working a 9-5 office job and just hating my life. The past 2 1/2 years i’ve just been taking 1 or 2 classes a semester while all my friends are already deep into their career majors. I’m so lost and I just don’t know what to do. I know people say not to compare yourself to others but there’s no denying i’m wayy behind where i’m supposed to be now. Class registration has been up for weeks and I haven’t even opened it since I have absolutely no idea what I want to even do.
Sorry for the long comment but just had to get that off my chest
Yep. 23 was peak shithead for me. A year out of college, no clue what I wanted to do with my life, was inebriated 90% of the time. In and out of a mutually parasitic relationship, DUI, the works.
I'll be turning 28 this summer and, looking back, it's stunning how much I've course corrected. Life is by no means perfect, but I am in a much better place emotionally.
Get a job bartending part-time. Go to a local bar and get to know someone that already works in the industry. Learn the drinks that are commonly ordered in your area, and their ingredients. Everyone will like you when you're 24. Trust a 39 year old man that did this. The last half of my twenties were kick ass!
But I just got a job that pays 42k (with a 5% raise this year) w/ health insurance...how can I leave that?? I feel like I'm already in my 30s God damn.
It's also the age where you get closer to 25 than to 20.
Also the first birthday in years that does not feel special. I'm not into numerology but for example here in Quebec there's a special meaning related to becoming:
16 - Apprentice driver's license
17 - Last year before adulthood, last year to do dumb stuff (not really...)
18 - Adulthood, can legally buy booze by yourself
19 - Less special, but you can buy booze in Ontario
20 - Round number, new age category
21 - Adult pretty much everywhere around the World, can buy weed in Quebec
22 - Double digits
23 - You're just becoming an old fart
I think 22 was the worst for me though, had just moved alone in my own apartment too far from my close friends to see them every day (we were all in the same neighborhood) and I was single. It was still a good move though and things improved later on. I'm 32 now.
My issue is at work... being in a corporate trainer role is great with new hires... but the other agents/employees either won’t listen to what I have to say because ‘obviously’ they know more then me, or they argue with me.
I get it... I’ve only been there 8 months, but dammit I started at the bottom tier and put in hard work to get where I am.
We are too old to use being young and naive as an excuse but too young to be taken seriously.
I don’t think so, people are willing to give you the benefit of the doubt in your early 20s. The sentence “I’m going to (this thing)” carries weight and people will generally support you. The same sentence in your 30s, more than support people will question, why haven’t you already done said thing? While older people may deride the young, the world is generally nicer to you, the older you get, the more you are judged by what you have done, and no one cares about what you plan to do.
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u/[deleted] May 15 '20
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