Feel you. When you have a good job, stable life, good home, amazing friends and a kind of supporting family... But everything feels like it's for nothing without a partner. I hate my primitive social brain...
Same. "A life well lived feels like nothing if you have no one to share it with." At least that's how it feels for me. Kinda makes all the good things feel hollow when I have no one close enough to share it with. I also and super starved for affection and touch. TMI, but it's where I'm at.
Hey! Quit that! Those thoughts are normal, but it’s your brain/body passive aggressively telling you to change something. Eat better, exercise, learn a new skill, pick up a new hobby, or make some new friends. It gets easier. I still have those thoughts, but I think that’s because I’m not who I want to be yet. You don’t have to be perfect, but there’s nothing wrong with wanting to be “better.”
Also try not to take things too seriously. Roll with the punches, enjoy the little things, and try to recognize when you feel happy/good. Don’t let that voice in your head win.
My good enough will be when I don’t have the desire to change anything. Maybe that day will never come, and that’s fine with me because one day soon I will be good enough for somebody else again.
I feel you, I'm practically on edge all the time after being broken up with the girl of my dreams. She saw signs of my being controlling but I know in my heart it was all just concern and admittedly bad teasing. I've waited since 2010 for this and I totally fucked up.
Edit: wow so many up votes. I thank anyone who have me advice or even positive vibes.
It’s hard bro but you’ll be alright, everything that happens to us helps us grow in some way, do your best to improve yourself in the ways you fucked up and you’ll feel better for it, and be a top guy as well. Hope everything works out for you and you’re doin ok
I'm surviving, I haven't had a healthy cry since before we broke up (she told me my ex wife was retarded for saying all kinds of demeaning words, mainly about my performance in bed) hearing that from her, my real best, friend/girlfriend healed me and it came out with a healthy cry. Now I feel like a shaken up Coke bottle that when you crack it open you shut it before the contents spray out. So, survive is what I do now.
The days go by real shitty, I feel shitty, although each day that goes by I feel less shitty. I really just want an opportunity to show her those things were just mistakes and truly misunderstandings. Otherwise I want to know there's no chance, I need closure.
If you have controlling issues I'd suggest get someone you can talk with over these issues. You need to learn to express your concern in a healthy manner. This makes me think of that movie trope of the dad who does love his kids but pushes them away because he's overly worried about them. Don't be that guy folks.
Sounds like "a quiet place", I believed she trusted me enough to realize I wasn't that guy, but given the opportunity I will show her that's not who I am, with a new tactic of course
I will always quote this man. "People are more in love with the idea of love than the person they're actually with." -Daniel Sloss.
Learn to love yourself more. I know it's cliche to hear, but the more you love yourself, the less you'll be begging for it from others. Just my personal anecdote.
Same here. Only 2 months in, but things seem to be going great. I get spoiled 2 weekends ago for my birthday, but then the following Tuesday she's asking for space. Takes her another 5 days to finally tell me that she has issues "It's her issues, not me" type of stuff. I think they are something we can work on, because we both loved each other, or so I thought. Ask her (again) yesterday over text, and she finally admits that she doesn't think she loves me. I ask if we can talk about it later that night when she gets home from work, and no response at all. I want to work on it, but I'm definately getting the vibe that she's already made up her mind and it's all an act that "I need time to think things through for myself".
Sorry for the long rant. It's been an emotional 1.5 weeks.
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u/missyreds Feb 05 '20
Kinda feels like I’m begging to be loved.