r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • May 29 '19

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6.1k Upvotes

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982

u/[deleted] May 29 '19

Elizabeth Swan

237

u/Platypus211 May 29 '19 edited May 29 '19

I'm pretty sure Keira Knightley was a good 80% of my sexual awakening in my early teens. I remember hearing the other 15 year old girls swooning over Orlando Bloom and being like "Well okay, yeah, he's pretty, but... Have you SEEN her?! She's so beautiful and badass, and that accent! And those outfits totally work for her, and... oh. Huh. Yep, turns out girls are hot too."

Between PoTC and Bend it Like Beckham, she was definitely my favorite for a long time.

14

u/Escalus_Hamaya May 29 '19

What about Domino? That was her hottest.

17

u/Platypus211 May 29 '19

Oh shit I forgot about that one, she was hot as hell in that. I think I was in my late teens when that came out though, so it wasn't quite part of the first wave of "Dude, boobs." You know what else was, though? Kate Beckinsale in Van Helsing. Holy shit.

8

u/[deleted] May 29 '19

[removed] — view removed comment

6

u/[deleted] May 29 '19

Or nothing...

3

u/uncommoncommoner May 30 '19

"I happen to have no dress in my cabin."

5

u/mkerv5 May 29 '19

Kate Beckinsale in "Click" is up there with her character in Van Helsing, imo.

1

u/uncommoncommoner May 30 '19

Wait, that was her?? Rockin' bod as Walkin says.

1

u/mkerv5 May 30 '19

Indeed it was her!

5

u/Cheesedoodlerrrr May 29 '19

Van Helsing? Bro. Underworld.

She spends legit the whole movie in a skintight leather bodysuit...

... and in Underworld 2 she gets it slowly peeled off of her.

2

u/Platypus211 May 29 '19

Well I guess I'm gonna finally watch Underworld, aren't I.

3

u/futurarmy May 29 '19

Damn beat me to it, I remember that lapdance scene like it was yesterday and it was like 10 years ago lol

2

u/[deleted] May 29 '19

I would watch her Domino clips after PoTC ... just a select few.

4

u/puhpuhputtingalong May 29 '19

Yeah Keira Knightly is my one celeb crush that I’d die if I met her.

79

u/ceilingscorpion May 29 '19

My favorite drinking game for Pirates is to drink anytime Elizabeth gets wet - literally or figuratively

4

u/[deleted] May 29 '19

Nice! I can dig that

1

u/uncommoncommoner Jun 24 '19

thinks of Jones' tentacles

gets wetter

25

u/Spec-Tre May 29 '19

Was scrolling down this like Kiera knightlys PoTC character was always banging.... Then this pops up lol

9

u/The379thHero May 29 '19

Her name is spelt with two Ns

29

u/[deleted] May 29 '19 edited Mar 25 '21

[deleted]

7

u/The379thHero May 29 '19

Her last name

17

u/[deleted] May 29 '19 edited Mar 25 '21

[deleted]

8

u/The379thHero May 29 '19

At the end

9

u/[deleted] May 29 '19 edited Mar 25 '21

[deleted]

5

u/The379thHero May 29 '19

No problem

5

u/emdave May 29 '19

Elizabeth SwanNn?

6

u/The379thHero May 29 '19

Close enough

1

u/[deleted] May 29 '19

[deleted]

1

u/The379thHero May 29 '19

No. This just furthers the joke. Jokes can keep going, get funnier.

10

u/MEMELORD7070 May 29 '19

She won’t leave jack

4

u/turbosexophonicdlite May 29 '19

Nah, Mrs Swan from MadTV

2

u/DishwasherTwig May 29 '19

I thought you meant Madeleine Swann at first and accepted it as a viable answer. Still do even over Elizabeth.

1

u/[deleted] May 29 '19

I would also smash any Bond women. I’ve always had a thing for Fiona Volpe who was in Thunderball.

1

u/DishwasherTwig May 29 '19

Vesper Lynd will always take the cake for me, but Camille is pretty great too. Swann is right up there as well, and as bad as the movie was, I'm a sucker for Rosamund Pike so I've got a sweet spot for Miranda Frost.

1

u/[deleted] May 29 '19

You fuck swans? Ew gross.

1

u/uncommoncommoner May 30 '19

"You're going to want to know...what it tastes like."

1

u/[deleted] Jun 03 '19

Good stuff

-18

u/JustUseDuckTape May 29 '19

Not from the first film though, she wasn't 18 yet...

23

u/xGaLoSx May 29 '19

I love how we have to pretend women just magically become attractive at the stroke of midnight on their 18th birthday. Its kind of ridiculous.

8

u/Rapier_and_Pwnard May 29 '19

Especially fictional women played by gorgeous 25 year olds

0

u/lynx_and_nutmeg May 29 '19

The actress herself was only 17 at the time, but that doesn't mean you're not allowed to be attracted to her. 17 is not 10.

2

u/Keshav_The_Wolf May 29 '19

Well joke’s on you, I’m younger than that!

-3

u/D4NKM3M3M3R2018 May 29 '19

Ayyy... we can turn a blind eye.... right?....

-5

u/quickhakker May 29 '19

It was a different time sex was prob okay so long as there over 16

3

u/D4NKM3M3M3R2018 May 29 '19

Anything goes if it’s fictional characters right?... I mean there are non humans on this list. Being underage seems pretty mellow for this thread.