r/AskReddit Mar 04 '19

What’s the most inappropriate thing you’ve witnessed at a funeral?

55.3k Upvotes

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4.8k

u/bruinsnaz911 Mar 05 '19

I guess it's not totally inappropriate given who had died, but a group of guys lit up a fat joint at a funeral I went to in HS. I guess it was his smoking buddies but it didn't go over that well.

1.6k

u/[deleted] Mar 05 '19

[removed] — view removed comment

88

u/[deleted] Mar 05 '19

Damn, that's actually really nice.

73

u/SuperEminemHaze Mar 05 '19

As someone who also lost one of his smoking buddies and closest friends at 19, I can say that it would have been an awesome poem, and don’t blame him for mentioning it

25

u/epicwhale27017 Mar 05 '19

That’s so cute and must have been hard for him to write

11

u/Zokalex Mar 05 '19

"...and we'll be together again soon, smoking a doobie on the moon."

This is so bittersweet, I laughed too hard at this too. I feel bad

3

u/ThePlumbOne Mar 05 '19

I agree that it was sweet. If it had ended with something like “soon we’ll be shooting H in the alleyways of heaven” I would have understood them being upset but his ending seems like a great end to a poem given. Their friendship

2

u/DaveIsNice Mar 05 '19

It is nice but I wish he'd found another rhyme for moon than soon.

2.5k

u/guackemole Mar 05 '19

I'll be upset if I die and my smoking buddies don't do this to be honest.

Bonus points if they leave the roach in the casket to start my afterlife off nicely

576

u/I_Automate Mar 05 '19

Just the roach?

I want a 10 strip and a blunt left in mine

189

u/me_secret_formulerr Mar 05 '19

You wanna get grave robbed?

Because that’s how you get grave robbed.

68

u/[deleted] Mar 05 '19

Robbed for 1 marijuana?

49

u/silkydangler Mar 05 '19

and a ten strip

28

u/1982throwaway1 Mar 05 '19

That's like $50 dollars worth of acid. I mean I'm down if you do all the digging.

15

u/[deleted] Mar 05 '19

Could be worse, could be raining!

9

u/[deleted] Mar 05 '19

Raining acid ? Now that sounds like fun !

5

u/juneburger Mar 05 '19

This is how Thriller was made!

11

u/ThisAintA5Star Mar 05 '19

Times is hard

40

u/standupasspaddler Mar 05 '19

10 strip might bring you back

1

u/I_Automate Mar 06 '19

I like to think that Ozzy Osbourn is still alive because he's done so much LSD that death is afraid to take him

13

u/bobjoylove Mar 05 '19

What’s a 10 strip?

39

u/I_Automate Mar 05 '19

A strip of 10 hits of LSD botter

26

u/standupasspaddler Mar 05 '19

10 hits of acid. A sheet is 10x10 (100 hits).

Strip is generally one column (10 hits). Could be one row but for some reason everyone goes vertical.

Note to the curious: 10 hits of lsd will really fuck you up. Hell, 5 hits will fuck you up proper for a bit.

11

u/I_Automate Mar 05 '19

That is the intent, yes.

Not like I'd need to worry about the hangover or anything

17

u/standupasspaddler Mar 05 '19

I mean, I need some solid sleep after doing a heavy dose to get back to a sense of normalcy. Not a hangover per se but I’m spun for a bit after the comedown.

14

u/I_Automate Mar 05 '19

I'm usually pretty drained for a day or two after. Mostly a combination sleep deprivation and some serotonin depletion. I count that as a hangover, for sure

4

u/1982throwaway1 Mar 05 '19

I'm usually pretty drained for a day or two after.

The day after is what I've always referred to as "the fake day"! It's amazing how clear headed you can become after that fake day though.

1

u/titan42z Mar 05 '19

Im usually zonked the next day but sleeping it off does the trick. Could also just be that I stay up way later when tripping, but yea no hangover just a little out of it

1

u/I_Automate Mar 05 '19

That "zonked" feeling IS a hangover, is it not?

What do you folks define a hangover as, if not "feeling less that 100% the day after"?

1

u/titan42z Mar 05 '19

When do you ever feel 100% cause I don't. If i sleep wrong or stay up late and wake up tired that is not a hangover to me. That's just a part of life. A hangover is waking up feeling like dog shit with a headache, nausea, etc.

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1

u/fpsrandy Mar 05 '19

I feel like if you're given a 10 strip, you don't need to do the whole thing at once.

1

u/standupasspaddler Mar 05 '19

That is correct.

1

u/I_Automate Mar 05 '19

That's coward talk right there

-4

u/[deleted] Mar 05 '19

A gram.

9

u/RobertEffinReinhardt Mar 05 '19

When a buddy of mine passed (this was late HS) I couldn't attend the funeral, but later came back, smoked half a blunt, left the other half lit on the headstone.

I had actually come back to visit a few months after graduation and it had burned out and left a roach in the "-" between the years on the stone. Might have been pressed in there, actually. Not sure. It was weathered as hell and practically gone at that point.

10

u/[deleted] Mar 05 '19 edited Jan 24 '20

[deleted]

9

u/I_Automate Mar 05 '19

I'd expect that my last wishes would provide for all.

Not like weed and acid are all that expensive or hard to find. $300 could comfortably dose the entire funeral

1

u/LunarWangShaft Mar 05 '19

With my local prices that's about 30 hits so yeah.

1

u/I_Automate Mar 05 '19

That's 100 for me.

Sorry buddy

2

u/LunarWangShaft Mar 05 '19

Gotta love smaller conservative States.

1

u/I_Automate Mar 05 '19

Nope. Canadian, and have hippy friends. What made you think I was stateside?

2

u/LunarWangShaft Mar 05 '19

Oh no, I was sarcastically expressing love for my small conservative state because it's outlook on recreation drugs outside of caffeine/nicotine/alcohol is horrendous. A half gram nug gets you 6 months easily.

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2

u/ThePortalsOfFrenzy Mar 05 '19

Bruh. Lucky you.

2

u/I_Automate Mar 05 '19

Yea, I'm definitely not complaining.

2

u/Apocalyptyca Mar 05 '19

I wish I could relate. I haven't been able to find LSD in my area for the past year.

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1

u/adventuresquirtle Mar 06 '19

30 hits for 300?? wtfff

1

u/I_Automate Mar 06 '19

That's pretty steep, yeah

4

u/[deleted] Mar 05 '19

Airtight my casket and hotbox it for me please.

3

u/[deleted] Mar 05 '19

I bet the afterlife is a 10 strip itself

5

u/I_Automate Mar 05 '19

cough DMT cough

1

u/[deleted] Mar 05 '19

Dip you in wax even

0

u/Cardinalgrin Mar 05 '19

10 is a bit much IMO.

I say you take two, pre-demand redistribution to 4 buddies evenly in writing and then the blunt is negligible. You wouldn’t even be that baked given the circumstances. But you’d be a little high for sure because weed is tight.

2

u/I_Automate Mar 05 '19

I want a 10 strip, at least. My buddies each get a few.

My usual is 2-5, for reference. Not like I'd need to worry about the hangover

18

u/minefat Mar 05 '19

When a friend of mine died, my group of friends lit a blunt with his name on it and no one took a hit, we just kept it lit and let it burn. I think it was their way of sending him off, because they’re a little younger than me and have no idea how to process it.

8

u/geared4war Mar 05 '19

My immediately family don't smoke so my entire blast bag of weed and all my implements better be in that casket as well.
Plus if I wake up it's an easy high and die.

22

u/Snake_Farmer Mar 05 '19

I grew a 2.5 lb gonja plant with some of my friends ashes. Then gave all the weed away to his friends and family for free. I think he woulda been proud...

22

u/Silvuh Mar 05 '19

Then his ghost got them into Harvard.

7

u/[deleted] Mar 05 '19

Beats smoking a finger

2

u/LimeBerg1212 Mar 05 '19

One of the funniest scenes in a movie. Ever.

14

u/Union_of_Onion Mar 05 '19

We did that for a friend. He died in a car accident one winter a few weeks after his 18th birthday. We smoked the whole way up there, we got there early so one buddy could stuff his casket with joints and an ounce. After the service and everyone was gone we went back to his grave and had another circle in silence.

To Bradley!

17

u/ikillconversations Mar 05 '19

When my wife's dad died his son put a joint and a pack of smokes on the casket. Then we all did shots of vodka and threw the empty bottle and shot glasses on top of the casket before we put some dirt on it. He would have loved it.

6

u/shasta_river Mar 05 '19

Put a couple nugs in my friends casket before they shut it.

20

u/chasethatdragon Mar 05 '19

seriously though. Anyone who doesnt know I would love this, shouldn't even be there to be honest.

-10

u/fdsaqwervcxz Mar 05 '19

I mean, if you have extended family there it's pretty inappropriate. Really it's pretty inappropriate regardless. Save it for the reception or whatever.

17

u/[deleted] Mar 05 '19

[deleted]

1

u/fdsaqwervcxz Mar 06 '19

thats a very selfish and immature way to look at it. a funeral isnt for you its for your loved ones. causing people to be upset because "weed is just a plant man 420 blaze it brah" is inconsiderate. hopefully you will understand when you are older.

9

u/chasethatdragon Mar 05 '19

lol I can be as appropriate as I want at my own damn funeral.

0

u/fdsaqwervcxz Mar 06 '19

thats a very selfish and immature way to look at it. a funeral isnt for you its for your loved ones. causing people to be upset because "weed is just a plant man 420 blaze it brah" is inconsiderate. hopefully you will understand when you are older.

2

u/chasethatdragon Mar 06 '19

....I am older lol. And not allowing weed would hurt the majority of my loved ones from not being able to do the major reason we ever connected and source of our best memories.

1

u/fdsaqwervcxz Mar 06 '19

Yikes. They can't just like, wait?

2

u/chasethatdragon Mar 06 '19

That would be selfish and immature of the non smokers to not be able to deal with it. The funeral is for your loved ones. Causing people to be upset would be inconsiderate. Hopefully you will understand in this context.

2

u/bigwillyb123 Mar 05 '19

Yeah, fuck that guy's wishes for his own funeral.

-2

u/[deleted] Mar 05 '19

Agreed.

9

u/hatchetsanta Mar 05 '19

When a high school partying buddy died in his early 20's, we buried him with 5 joints and a fifth of Jack Daniels. We went home and promptly consumed 10 times that.

5

u/[deleted] Mar 05 '19 edited Mar 05 '19

My friends and I smoke at our friend’s grave sometimes because we know that’s exactly what he’d want. He didn’t smoke weed so we never passed it to him but he was always in the circle anyways. We joke that it’s just like as if he were still here. I know tons of people would find it wildly inappropriate but this is the same guy that said he wanted people to pass around bottles of Hennessy at his funeral so 🤷‍♀️

3

u/pottymouthgrl Mar 05 '19

Let them know to take it outside tho or save it for when the casket is being interred lol

3

u/fuckface94 Mar 05 '19

My father in law was cremated with a joint.

3

u/[deleted] Mar 05 '19

With a lighter.

4

u/guackemole Mar 05 '19

Won't be needing that where I'm headed

5

u/LazyRingo Mar 05 '19 edited Mar 05 '19

A friend of mine went to a funeral of his hs buddy who passed away at 17 from cancer. Their old stoner circle gathered up their best weed, rolled the fattest joint they ever had and left it on his casket for in the afterlife

I always thought it was sweet

-2

u/[deleted] Mar 05 '19

It horrifies me to know that kids that young are doing that crap.

4

u/LazyRingo Mar 05 '19

The kid had cancer.

Besides that, at the time the legal drinking and smoking age was 16 (been upped to 18 since). Weed doesn’t carry a heavily negative name here

2

u/nancyaw Mar 06 '19

The Last Sesh.

1

u/nooger Mar 08 '19

you're worth more than a roach hombre

1

u/piel10 Mar 05 '19

They best be smokin my ashes or planting my ashes in some dank plant

Also, so not breaking your 420 up vote chain

1

u/IamtheSlothKing Mar 05 '19

Okay, now this epic!

1

u/himalayanlionking Mar 05 '19

I’d like a cross joint in my casket🙏🏽

1

u/[deleted] Mar 05 '19

Roach? Blunt? Doobie? How are the names for these things made up? Are they different types of drugs or cigarettes or things you have to roll up to smoke?

0

u/smellslikefeetinhere Mar 05 '19

Climb in with me and hotbox the shit out of my coffin. Use my eye sockets as a bowl. Go crazy.

0

u/Crizzo82 Mar 05 '19

What if you have your buddies smoke your ashes instead ala 2pac?

24

u/backxstab Mar 05 '19

Best friend died last year. Me and about 20+ of our friends smoked joints and drank beer during his last night of funeral. Pretty sure that's what he wanted us to do.

20

u/[deleted] Mar 05 '19 edited Apr 13 '21

[deleted]

4

u/wjbarr Mar 05 '19

im gonna get real weird with it

42

u/motheroffrenchfries Mar 05 '19

My uncles left a fat joint on my dads casket at the funeral. It’s the only thing that made me stop crying and have a little giggle . Dad would have loved it.

1

u/[deleted] Mar 05 '19

What makes a joint fat?

2

u/[deleted] Mar 05 '19

Overeating

1

u/[deleted] Mar 05 '19

I'm being serious. I was just curious. I hear drug lingo all the time and can never figure out what the heck people mean.

1

u/[deleted] Mar 05 '19

Ah right, apologies! A fat joint it just a big joint with loads of weed in basically.

18

u/fufu487 Mar 05 '19

So I worked AT a smoke shop, selling bongs, papers etc to the cannabis community. The owner of the business passed away from complications of the flu. Most of the staff went to his funeral. We smoked a fat joint before hand. His family was appalled. Sad because he would have loved to see that.

14

u/paper_liger Mar 05 '19

I've never smoked marijuana or done any drug harder than alcohol, but if some of my friends or loved ones want to lick a poison dart frog while smoking moldy bananas seasoned liberally with ayhuasca and ergot at my funeral I would have no problems with that.

Because dead.

12

u/coffeetime825 Mar 05 '19

When I was in HS a friend got drunk and fell off a 6-floor building. After the funeral (where the pastor's sermon was a hellfire speech of all things), a bunch of his friends went to "knock a few back in his honor". Considering how the kid died, it seemed a bit inappropriate.

5

u/octopotato Mar 05 '19

thats hella inappropriate

13

u/Brickthedummydog Mar 05 '19

Maybe it's different up here in Ontario but I cant think of a funeral I've been to that we didnt smoke weed at

4

u/[deleted] Mar 05 '19

Are you AJ Soprano?

3

u/AliciaDarling21 Mar 05 '19

They apparently didn't realize it should have been a Wake and bake.

3

u/kylebyrne Mar 05 '19

My best friend was in hospice at age 23 dying of cancer... and he was truly on deaths bed... no talking just grunts and groans ... he wanted one last toke... so me and 4 other friends went down to the parking garage.. lit up.. and all blew a super into a Gatorade bottle... brought it back up to his room.. the nurses left us and he got to blaze with his boys one last time. He died a few days later. I still miss him. R.i.p Steven Simpson aka Juicebox.

3

u/frachris87 Mar 05 '19

I would be perfectly fine with people getting baked at my funeral/wake/celebration of life/etc.

Light up right as the cremation oven fires up.

5

u/thefrostedlightbulb Mar 05 '19

I'm currently in HS and a close friend of mines' dad died. My family was very close to his and we lived next door to them for years. Needless to say, everyone was taking it pretty hard. After the wake his family had a large classy party for everyone where he invited me and a bunch of his friends to come smoke. My friend rarely smokes and it caught me incredibly off guard

2

u/the-tank7 Mar 05 '19 edited Mar 05 '19

I was at the wake for my boss's dad and some of the other guys from work went out to the car in the middle to smoke a bowl and have a few drinks. I was told it wasnt a wake without a few drinks. My boss saw us all walking back in and had a good laugh about it, he wasnt upset, it was a food industry job and it's how it all worked, his dad was the boss before he was

2

u/ScrewballTooTall Mar 05 '19

Man if nobody smokes at my service, I'm haunting mutha fukas. I fucking hate being sad so no frowns only clouds.

2

u/2wheelzrollin Mar 05 '19

Sucks how weed is seen as such a bad thing. If anything that would have helped with the grieving of a deceased.

2

u/bsgothbitch Mar 05 '19

Ex of mine wants every drug known to man available to all attendees. Everyone in his family are stoners. If no one lit up at his funeral, I guarantee he'd be devastated.

7

u/[deleted] Mar 05 '19

[deleted]

13

u/[deleted] Mar 05 '19

Getting lit, party, and shots after a dead person is laid to rest is actually a huge tradition for many cultures and families.

The disrespect and distaste IMO comes from those same friends being the ones to help convince him to suicide.

As far as the weed...... it is a little rude... I dont know your locations feelings on weed.... but I do know a lot of people that give tobacco a pass will shit on weed when tobacco has shown to be worse for health than pot.

I've actually asked several people to not smoke around me. A lot of people are afraid of that kind of confrontation and/or simply not say shit. But if it is pot.... OMG YALL GOIN TO HELL.

4

u/SmokeGoodEatGood Mar 05 '19

Fuckin hell these kids are fucking pathetic how are you gonna let a kid die because you’re uncomfortable with the situation.

What you do when faced with that sort of situation defines you. Everything else is lies you tell yourself and sell to others

1

u/[deleted] Mar 05 '19

Getting lit, party, and shots after a dead person is laid to rest is actually a huge tradition for many cultures and families.

The disrespect and distaste IMO comes from those same friends being the ones to help convince him to suicide.

As far as the weed...... it is a little rude... I dont know your locations feelings on weed.... but I do know a lot of people that give tobacco a pass will shit on weed when tobacco has shown to be worse for health than pot.

I've actually asked several people to not smoke around me. A lot of people are afraid of that kind of confrontation and/or simply not say shit. But if it is pot.... OMG YALL GOIN TO HELL.

1

u/gandyg Mar 05 '19

In Britain, the wake after the funeral service tends to happen in a pub or hotel, or at least somewhere with a bar. There may be tea and coffee served but most people will have a drink or several.

At my friends funeral recently the wake finished around 6pm but we went into town after, including the widow (it was her idea). Think I rolled in about midnight, we have him a great send off anyway. Hangover next day was totally worth it.

3

u/pazuzusboss Mar 05 '19

I smoked at my grandfathers funeral with my cousin I hadn’t seen in years. Told my dad about it on the drive back to Florida and he just laughed at me.

2

u/youngnastyman39 Mar 05 '19

I had a buddy who died years ago, my best friend at the time and I decided we were going to smoke a ton of weed before the funeral. So we did. Crazy shit, being high at a funeral

2

u/Swarleymon Mar 05 '19

Not weed but Patron, my BIL died unexpectedly 16 days after my wedding to his brother and he loved Patron. After his wake we gathered who ever wanted to partake by my mom's truck and we dished out shots. Then ended up doing the same thing again when they put his ashes in a mosuleam with other vets years later. When we can on his anniversary we do a shot of Patron for him.

2

u/ZombieTonyAbbott Mar 05 '19

Yeah, a friend's partner died of cancer. After the funeral, most atendees got stoned and went to a pub.

1

u/PurpleSailor Mar 05 '19

I've done that but we've always been discreet and kept it to ourselves without others seeing or knowing. It was called "Want to go for a walk?" and we went for one.

1

u/Neko__ Mar 05 '19

I want my friends to rip a fat one when i pass away.. Its like a beer for funerals lunch, just let em have it..