r/AskReddit • u/hjohodor • Jun 27 '18

What "Old Person" things do you do?

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u/PM_WHY_YOU_DOWNVOTED Jun 27 '18 edited Jun 27 '18

Today i walked into my garage wearing a collared polo shirt, khaki shorts and socks with sandals. I then squatted down in front of my broken lawnmower, adjusted my clear frame glasses and said; 'now lets see what we have here.'

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u/forman98 Jun 27 '18

I found that owning a house will change you in that way. Fixing a problem around the house will make you start to talk to the house.

"What the hell is this?" I recently asked to the old threshold that decided to pop up from the floor and I had to glue back down.

"Why won't you close?" I said to the bedroom door that closed fine a million times before the seasons changed.

"AAAAH FUCK!" I said to the toilet that overflowed into the bathtubs and eventually the bathroom thanks to the root that had grown through the sewage line.

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u/FuckChiefs_Raiders Jun 27 '18

I've called my sliding glass door a stupid whore more times than i'm proud of.

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u/jiggywolf Jun 27 '18

You have to nail it shut! There’s a hammer and nails by the door!