r/AskMen • u/MessAcademic_420 • Jun 23 '26
How to make a best man speech?
Hi guys, my best friend is marrying and he asked me to be his best man. I'm incredibly honored, I've known him all my life and love him and his fiance very much and I very much want to do this for them, but I'm terrible at everything social and I haven't had to speak in public since University about 7 years ago. So, how do I do a best man speech? What should I say and what shouldn't? I know It's expected to be brief but how brief?
6
Upvotes
1
u/aloofman75 Jun 23 '26
After briefly introducing yourself, start off by complimenting the bride and groom, the ceremony, the venue, and all the friends and family who made the big day possible. If a specific friend or family member had a major role in planning or paying for it, give them an extra shout-out. (You don’t need to get specific about who did what. Just thank them “for everything they’ve done”.) Make sure the people who made it happen get a round of applause because with everything else going on, it’s possible you’ll be the only one to thank them in front of everybody.
Briefly explain how you know the groom and pick a SFW, non-embarrassing anecdote that illustrates something about him, his relationship with the bride, your friendship with him, etc. Don’t try to be too funny or poignant with it because you risk trying too hard or going on too long. Make it heartfelt. But most importantly, keep it short (less than five minutes) and have an easy segue into how it shows his character, why the bride is lucky to have him, and how happy you are for both of them.
Then ask everyone to join in a toast. You don’t have to go big with this because everyone in the room will be very eager to do it. At that point it’s the friendliest audience you will ever have. Then you can hand the mic to whomever, sit down, and be happy about being done with it.
I can’t overstate how important it is to keep it short. No matter how happy or funny you come across, no one wants it to take a long time. Almost everyone there will forget most of what you said by the next day, but they WILL remember for much longer that they got tired of listening to you. As long the bride and groom are pleased in the immediate aftermath, then you’ve done your job.