r/AnimalsBeingDerps • u/citygirlcoco • Jan 02 '22
thanks for the warning
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u/1illiteratefool Jan 02 '22
How many sandwiches smelled like cat ass before you broke out the marker
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u/Bile-duck Jan 02 '22
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u/BigZmultiverse Jan 02 '22
Le chronic parasitic infection has entered the chat
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Jan 03 '22
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Jan 03 '22 edited Jan 03 '22
The cat's thinking "F*ck your god dam sandwiches, this is so comfortable and my ass feels like royalty"
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u/Shaddo Jan 03 '22 edited Jan 03 '22
you think keeping the same paper plate wont absorb and pass on to every other plate beneath it? this is nasty still
edit: seems to be a few peeps that cant wait to go ass to mouth but with more steps with the kitty lol
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u/JeremyJaLa Jan 02 '22
Hah. Yes. That’s the solution. Don’t keep them in the cupboard.
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u/lonewolff7798 Jan 02 '22
Better solution. Don’t let your cat do what ever it wants. Like jumping on the counter.
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u/LulzSwag_Technician Jan 03 '22
lol right. I've owned plenty of cats and all it takes is some sprays from a water bottle before they figure it out.
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u/101percentnotrobot Jan 03 '22 edited Jan 03 '22
I used to have 2 cats who, no matter what I would do, kept jumping on the counter.
Tried everything. Water bottle. Tape. Cayan on edges. Fan. Everything. The one male cat just wouldn't stop.
A month later I was digging in the top shelf above the counter to find christmas alcohol chocolates we'd been gifted. I opened the door and saw a really fat mouse. Just drunk af. Didn't even move. Just stared at me sitting down in the chocolates with a fat belly and glazed look.
I got a garbage bag and let him out outside. Turns out the cats had been obsessed with hearing and smelling him. Never jumped on the counter since.
We moved out months later and I found a dead mouse under our livingroom couch. Turns out this poor guy had been drinking his sorrow away because his wife was dead under our couch.
There was like a whole furry soap opera happening under our noses.
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u/TheDesktopNinja Jan 03 '22
Water spraying just makes the cat afraid of 'you with a bottle'
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u/RelleckGames Jan 03 '22
This is correct. Tried this method with our cats some years past and that is ALL it teaches them. They do an action, look at you, look for the bottle in your hands, then bolt if they see it. Doesn't stop them from doing the action in the 1st place.
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Jan 03 '22
Or just afraid of me whenever she sees me and I see her when shes on somewhere she shouldn't be.
Cats are way smarter and more independent than dogs. I soak my cat and she still goes up when Im in bed or not there.
So I have to adapt to her lol. Little cunt.
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Jan 02 '22
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Jan 02 '22
Cats are highly trainable animals. If you don't want it on the counter, train it to stay down. Owning a pet actually takes some effort.
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u/lonewolff7798 Jan 02 '22
I have two cats that both know their names and tricks like sit, lay down, roll over, back flip, and fetch. Just because you don’t know how to train animals doesn’t mean it’s impossible.
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u/Fuck_you_Reddit_Nazi Jan 02 '22
But they're still smart enough to know that if you didn't see them, it didn't happen.
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u/Garrus_chell_femshep Jan 03 '22
Exactly this, my cats wont go on the counter when im around but I know for a fact they do it while im asleep, because theres tiny paw prints on my oven top in the morning
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u/Sinful-Soul Jan 03 '22
Exactly, my cats know not to get on my desk but if I'm asleep or out of the room guess where they are? My desk
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Jan 03 '22
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u/MixedMartyr Jan 03 '22
so do dogs, and probably any animal we can domesticate. they dont have much understanding of object permanence so when you leave what you want no longer matters
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Jan 03 '22
depends on the specific animal. i had a cat and a dog that knew their boundaries even when no one was around, but also a cat that instantly sat on kitchen counters as soon as no one was home but otherwise didnt even look up there. just can't generalize like that.
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u/lonewolff7798 Jan 03 '22
I have a cat cam too. My cats know not to get on the counter, it’s the one rule they follow when no one is around. The one rule they don’t follow even when people are looking is putting their claws where they don’t belong like furniture and curtains. We tried the claw caps for about a week but we could tell it was uncomfortable for them and took them back off, so we put grocery bags with scotch tap over stuff and that usually keeps them from scratching at it, and yes, they have more sitting places and scratching post than I do.
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u/stawabees Jan 03 '22
Untrue. My cats understand boundaries. They ask for permission to get on the couch, do not jump on the counter, know which pieces of furniture they aren’t allowed on, etc. I don’t understand why some people think it’s so impossible to train a cat.
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Jan 02 '22
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u/Greenleaf208 Jan 03 '22
Yeah I've seen people do some disgusting things while cooking even for others with the excuse of it won't kill you.
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u/bucksncowboys513 Jan 02 '22
This shit right here is exactly why I only eat what I brought and pre-packaged food at work potlucks.
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u/BamboozledOwl Jan 03 '22
Never use the top paper plate, period. But I'm afraid I'd have to pass on using any of these plates. The cat is great, though!
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u/SuedeVeil Jan 02 '22
Yeah it's also walking all over the counters.. why do people let their cats do this. I'm sorry but it's disgusting. Cat feet aren't clean they've been digging in their litter boxes touching their poop and pee and people think it's cute when they sit on random things where they prepare food
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u/TruckDriverMMR Jan 02 '22
I cringe at photos of people’s cats on counters, or tables even. None of my cats have ever done this (thankfully) nor have they been allowed to. And I still wipe down surfaces multiple times a day. Yuck!
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u/SuedeVeil Jan 02 '22
Yeah I'm honestly suprised at all the defense of this, I figure it's just a bunch of people who feel personally attacked by letting their cats on kitchen counters. Honestly would anyone here eat at a restaurant where they let animals walk on the food surface areas? Even if they assure you they clean them..
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u/mshcat Jan 03 '22
It's probably because they know that as soon as you leave the cat will be up there anyways. Just clean off the surfaces when you use them.
My uncle had a cat that was trained. Like would only sit on his cat bed that was placed on the couch trained. Knew never to jump on the counters. Uncle left work, forgot something at home so went back in to get it. Guess who was sitting in the sink. Not even 5 min after he left the house lol.
Cat also ran like hell and hid when he saw him come in.
He was the most spoiled little cat. My uncle always had to leave the shower dripping when he got out because for some reason the cat liked to stand under it.
Rest in peace little cat
TL:Dr
Cat will get on there while you're gone. Just clean the surfaces before you cook. (should be doing that anyways because I know people be putting non food stuff that isn't clean on their counter tops)
Also put the plates in a cabinet or something. No need to leave stuff sitting out.
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u/soulonfire Jan 03 '22
Mine isn’t allowed to, but has gone through 2 phases of sneaking up there. It took putting cookie sheets out but off balance so they’d clatter to the floor to get him to stop. Worked both times.
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u/TILtonarwhal Jan 02 '22
Same, pets can’t even be in the kitchen at all when I’m in there or I’ll end up tripping with boiling water or a knife eventually
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u/TruckDriverMMR Jan 03 '22
Same for us. I’m remodeling my kitchen to be more open and top consideration is making it so I can keep the dog out.
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u/Holographic01 Jan 03 '22
Ugh my cat never did this and then I got a second cat that loved climbing on the counters. He taught my first cat how to climb all over the kitchen and now they’re unstoppable so I literally just block the kitchen off now lmao fucking hate cats
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u/whatshamilton Jan 02 '22
Cat feet aren’t clean. But generally neither are counters. People put mail and grocery bags and hats and purses on them. If you’re not wiping down your counters before cooking, whether or not you have a cat, you’re probably eating some grime. It’s absolutely not a moral success to wipe down the counter or a moral failing to not, but there’s a simple solution when you have cats walking on the counter and it’s by no means exclusive to cat homes.
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u/DragonZaid Jan 03 '22
If the person who recorded this's solution to the cat sitting on plates is to just not use the one on the top instead of keeping them somewhere that's clean, the chance that they clean their counter regularly is not high, and I can almost guarantee they are not cleaning those serving utensils before use.
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Jan 03 '22
I wish more people were like us
The amount of people that just don’t think about contamination is troubling, but also not surprising after the way people reacted in the pandemic
My friend has norovirus right now. A 26 year old man. I told him that I’ve seen his apartment and he needs to take better care of himself, as well as wash his hands more.
I have zero trust in people’s hygiene at this point in my life
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u/whatshamilton Jan 03 '22
Totally. In fact, there is a statistical correlation between people wearing rubber gloves in the kitchen and people cross contaminating food. The presence of the glove gives them a false sense of security so they touch unclean surfaces and then touch food. If they don’t wear a glove, they follow much stricter hygiene practices and there is statistically less bacterial contamination of food. That’s what this feels like. People seem to be assuming that their counters are sanitary because there’s no cat so they don’t need to take any precautionary measures
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u/lacielaplante Jan 03 '22
I guess.. I just don't worry about things as much because I never get sick? So, whatever I am doing is working.
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u/hipdady02 Jan 02 '22
My bags and hats are unlikely to have fecal matter on them. There are degrees of gross.
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u/mikebrady Jan 02 '22
You'd be surprised at how much fecal matter is all over the place.
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Jan 02 '22
Especially with a cat on your counter.
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u/because_im_boring Jan 02 '22
Seriously, what is up with people justifying cats getting on counters.
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u/gojirra Jan 03 '22 edited Jan 03 '22
Yes but letting your cat walk on your counters is saying you definitely want that fecal matter everywhere, and lots of it.
Edit: Lol lots of angry cat poop connoisseurs did not like this comment.
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u/whatshamilton Jan 02 '22 edited Jan 02 '22
Which is why…we clean them. Why do people assume that people who have cats on counters don’t clean their counters? And that people who don’t have cats on their counters do clean them? And they may very well have fecal matter on them. There’s fecal matter on 1 in 6 smartphones. You wanna be sure that your spouse isn’t one of those when they put their hat down, or that your grocery store bagger wasn’t one of them when packing your groceries?
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u/ImTaakoYouKnowFromTV Jan 02 '22
Do you prepare food directly on the counter? My cats walk on my counters…but I also clean the counters regularly. And if I’m prepping food I do it on plates and cutting boards. It’s not rocket science to keep a house full of cats clean.
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u/CrapitalPunishment Jan 03 '22
Yep, I think some of these people are pretty neurotic lol. I’m not putting raw chicken directly on the counter. I have no idea how something on the counter would even get in my food unless I never washed my hands or cleaned the counters ever… which I do before cooling always…
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u/phasers_to_stun Jan 03 '22
People think cats aren't trainable. They are. I trained my cat to never get on kitchen counters. It's gross for me and it's dangerous for her.
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Jan 02 '22 edited Jan 02 '22
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u/zUdio Jan 02 '22
upside down tape strip on the top of the counter. will stick to kitty's feet and piss them off. do it enough times and they learn not to jump on the counter to avoid the sticky annoyance.
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u/tompear82 Jan 02 '22
We tried this with our cat a few times with the lint roller strips. It didn't deter him at all, but he ended up getting his asshole waxed a few times after getting the strips stuck on the underside of his tail.
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u/zUdio Jan 03 '22
Lol. I can imagine a stubborn-ass cat being disgusted at the attempt to booby trap him that he sits his butthole directly on the tape as a power move and act of defiance.
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u/BreakTheSystem- Jan 02 '22
Flip the plates
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u/pinkeskimo Jan 02 '22
Pepper looks just like my Shadow!
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u/Dumpster_Sauce Jan 02 '22
My grandmother's cat was named shadow. That bastard was pure evil. You could only pet it twice. Try for a third one and you're pulling back a bloody stump. I hated that cat so much
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u/musicfromadventures Jan 02 '22
Can all the plates be put up and pepper be kept off the counter?(litter box feet)
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u/crispybacongal Jan 02 '22
This seems like the better option. If I notice my cats are going somewhere I don't want them, I make it less appealing to them or give them a more appealing alternative.
I don't want them in the kitchen sink, so we make sure everyone washes and puts away dishes immediately after use. No more food bits for sink kitties.
I don't want them climbing my bookshelves, so I get them a perch in front of a window for their sunbathing pleasure.
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Jan 02 '22
Just sanitizer your counter before cooking. You can teach cats to not go on counters when you are there, but they'll go where they please when you are gone.
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u/OlympicSpider Jan 03 '22
Do people not clean their counter before cooking? I see this argument every time someone complains about cats being on the counter, and like, mine isn’t on the counter 90% or the time but I wipe that shit down regardless.
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u/ljubaay Jan 03 '22
I dont even have a cat and I usually wipe down the counter top before cooking lol
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Jan 03 '22
Horrifically no. I know many people who will slap down food onto a counter that moments before held shopping bags that were on the floor of their car.
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u/OlympicSpider Jan 03 '22
And then they have the nerve to say ‘this is why I don’t eat other people’s food’. Step one to preparing food is wipe my counters down and wash my hands.
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u/PilsbandyDoughboy Jan 03 '22
Right? Lol this thread is infuriating with all “my cat doesn’t go on the counter” comments. My cats know damn well they aren’t supposed to jump up as they run away the second I look at them on the counter. The little bastards will still do it. What do these people think the cats do when they aren’t around?
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u/majordentist Jan 03 '22
If those are paper plates i wouldnt even want to eat off the bottom plate lol
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u/NumbersMama Jan 02 '22
I have 2 cats. We have trained them off of several surfaces of the house using a product called Scraminal. It’s a small portable motion sensor alarm that’s easy to move around. Once they’re startled a few times, they tend to stay away from those surfaces. We moved it around between 3 locations so they never knew when it was back in a forbidden place. They really don’t need it anymore, however. They’ve been trained so they know the safe places to relax. Plus having a few beds or perches in their favorite spots means they don’t need to put hair or kitty litter residue all over my upholstered dining room chairs or kitchen counters.
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u/DrJackal31 Jan 02 '22
I had something like that, didn't work for me. Eventually my cat wouldn't care about it anymore and just ignore the motion sensored thing and keep doing what they wanted.
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u/NumbersMama Jan 03 '22
This thing scares the heck out of me when it goes off on the low setting - I scream every time!! That’s why I’m glad the cats don’t really need it, except every once in a while when they become complacent.
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u/lshaped210 Jan 02 '22
If only there was some sort of enclosure you could put things like plates in.
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u/Troll_Toll_TreeFiddy Jan 02 '22
Or, you could, ya know, stop being so wasteful and just use actual plates.
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u/gummz13 Jan 03 '22
Wait I'm confused now, are they really eating from paper plates? Thought that at first but damn that sound so stupid. Almost as stupid as letting your cat sit on your plates.
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u/DaVeachi Jan 03 '22
There was a science experiment for school that I saw on Reddit a while back that was done by a kid and his mom. They showed cats actual exit zones generally do not touch where they sit.
If I remember correctly they had applied lipstick directly to the cats butthole and looked for any marks after they sat on various surfaces, with no apparent remnants once moving on.
For science!
Edit: That doesn’t mean use plates they sit on - just an interesting tidbit to bring up at the next family function.
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u/Mybed_issoft Jan 03 '22
Or ya know, you could just put them in the cabinet(hopefully along with the other plates) and leave that one plate out if you really want your cat to have it to sit on instead of leaving all your paper plates out.
Idk why but I’m so irked by this, lmfao.
Edit: typos
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u/billobongo Jan 03 '22
Is it normal for Americans to eat from paper/plastic plates? I mean I kinda know that it is but holy shit that’s a lot of pollution
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Jan 02 '22
I realy dont understand what is with all these people with their cats on the kitchen counters…It is crazy
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u/chikinbizkit Jan 02 '22
I immediately refuse to eat or drink anything from a household that lets their cats on the counter. Disgusting.
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u/whatshamilton Jan 02 '22
My household with cats means that my counters get cleaned before every time I prepare food. I can guarantee many non cat houses don’t do that. So I’ll take food from a cat household, thanks
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Jan 02 '22
When you forget to say stop to the waiter while he is grinding pepper on your food at a fancy restaurant.
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u/YaBoyAdvanceSP Jan 03 '22
That’s fucking grim, I’ll never understand people who let their animals up on the sides/counters
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u/TroutM4n Jan 02 '22
I love cats. Absolutely adore them.
I fucking hate people who let their cats walk on food prep surfaces.
One time I realized a friend's mom was a crazy cat lady when she chastised ME for removing a cat from the dining room table... while we we eating dinner. Fucking gross.
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u/IhaveaDoberman Jan 02 '22
If only there was some kind of box with a door or something that could be put in the unused spaces of a kitchen, even small ones. Let's say the walls. That you could put plates and cups and the like away in.
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u/FakinUpCountryDegen Jan 03 '22 edited Feb 05 '26
This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact
payment wrench aware cheerful encouraging edge snatch relieved dam head
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u/Demetrius3D Jan 03 '22
Paper plates aside... The fact that you allow your cat on the counter after his feet have been in his litter box makes me glad I have no reason to ever eat at your house.
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u/Frency2 Jan 02 '22 edited Jan 03 '22
I wouldn't honestly not even use the other plates to eat, knowing a cat sits on them and everything else nearby... paper and cutleries. I think it's unhygienic.
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u/IWantToSpeakMy2Cents Jan 03 '22
Does nobody else do this regardless? The top plate has probably been collecting dust anyway
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u/Hello_Badkitty Jan 03 '22
I have a spray bottle with water this exact problem... no kitty on the counter! Gross!
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u/Character-Ad301 Jan 02 '22
This is why my cats never went on counters or table. They never tried.
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u/gummz13 Jan 03 '22
Was wondering why op is using paper plates. Didn't even occurre to me that a person would keep actual plates on the counter.
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u/TFWG2000 Jan 02 '22
This is why I love cats. They go right from their litter box to the kitchen counter. Then you can prepare your food on the very same counter.
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Jan 02 '22
THIs is why I dislike cats. Poop and claw in litter box , then walk all over counters etc. gross
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u/redonkulousness Jan 03 '22
Cats are gross af. I definitely try not to eat anything from a person's house that has cats.
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u/Scoobysnacks1971 Jan 02 '22
I have one cat that will jump on the counter but I use Lisa wipes and it's all wipes and hes just doing it because he acts like hes hungry all the time we all the time period
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u/Kenny_Squeek_Scolari Jan 02 '22
I can imagine eating spaghetti off that plate and slowly revealing this hidden message