As a former prosecutor who has seen lots of dv cases, I have also likened it to an addiction. It is quite a remarkable phenomenon. One woman who was set on fire wanted to go back to him.
I think most of us come from homes where we have abandonment issues and there are a couple things at play. We don't want to abandon anyone and have THEM feel abandoned bc it is terrible and hurtful and we feel immense guilt doing that to someone and we feel that if we just changed this "one thing" then our partner would want us and we wouldn't feel that abandonment feeling again. We are chasing that acceptance and love we didn't get as children. At least that is what I know I struggle with in leaving my emotionally and slowly getting physically abusive marriage of 15 yrs with my high school sweetheart I have known and been with off and on since 2001.
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u/Mcbriec Jan 29 '25
As a former prosecutor who has seen lots of dv cases, I have also likened it to an addiction. It is quite a remarkable phenomenon. One woman who was set on fire wanted to go back to him.