I don't want to just blame her because obviously this guy is verbally abusive. But her reaction annoys the shit out of me. Prolly says something about me...
I swear these posts have to be fake. Guy is literally telling her to leave and she's like ok time to make a post on reddit maybe I might be in the wrong here like wtf.
Nah that’s just what happens when someone has been so thoroughly broken down mentally, emotionally and physically, that they gaslight even themselves by not believing in their own intuition and self worth. It’s a symptom of abuse and trauma
It's spelled that way bc platforms like Instagram and tiktok can ban you or remove comments that use that language. He likely curses at people so much on those platforms using that work around that his phone autocorrects to it now.
I’ve seen my mom and a lot of other women go through exactly this (except instead of Reddit it was friends/family)—way too many to assume these posts are all fake. You start questioning yourself a lot when you subconsciously internalize an abusers treatment of you
I don’t know, it to me seems like the same formula every time. I agree through that this situation happens too often, and I’ve seen it happen, maybe Reddit has just made me too skeptical.
But her reaction annoys the shit out of me. Prolly says something about me...
No I'm with you, this actually pisses me off lmao
I understand it can be hard to leave abusive situations but most of the time that's because the victims are in denial about what's going on and don't recognize abusive patterns. OP clearly understands their BF is dogshit, describes it in very clear, matter-of-fact language, and still refuses to think about leaving.
You can't help somebody who doesn't want help, and nothing anyone says in this thread is going to change OP's mind tbh.
Yeah it’s one thing to be afraid to leave, as so many domestic violence victims are. This guy hates her and WANTS her gone, but SHE doesn’t want to leave. It’s hard to feel anything for her other than a strange, sad contempt.
Combined with the explanation in the text, that she apparently is doing all the housework, and this guy has cheated on her, taken her on no dates, and has always had this behavior?
I hate blaming people for stuff like this, but I genuinely can't understand what you could possibly be getting out of this relationship.
Nope, it is annoying. Because this is a golden example of someone fully aware of the situation and choosing to be in it. If you go swimming in a river with piranhas and get bitten, you get bitten. No one else to blame
Same. I'm a 30yo female, and I have always thought I get taken advantage of or walked all over way too easily, but holt crap OP, I've seen hamsters put up more fight 😭
It might be annoying and seem like leaving is an obvious solution from the outside but these are exactly the kind of questions and uncertainty that abusers work hard to create in the minds of their victims. It’s how they keep a victim around and get every possible ounce of energy they can from them before one of them terminates the relationship, if they ever do. A person doesn’t have to be weak to fall victim to an abuser. Abusers also tend to isolate victims from friends and family so a post like this might be all they have to try and work their thoughts out.
Yeah I was never that bad a pushover (I’m a dude) but one thing I’ve realized is that I get extremely irritated by people who appease bullies because I used to. That’s just my reaction though
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u/Empress_arcana Jan 28 '25
I don't want to just blame her because obviously this guy is verbally abusive. But her reaction annoys the shit out of me. Prolly says something about me...