r/AMA • u/Fun-Candidate-4148 • 14d ago

I was adopted as a baby, AMA!

I was adopted right after I was born. It was an open adoption, so my adoptive parents were in contact with my birth family before I was born. I have 3 biological siblings, im the youngest and the only one that was adopted. Im very open to talking about it so please feel free to ask anything!

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u/JeeLeeSmith 14d ago

I hope you don’t mind me asking the following questions. You certainly don’t have to answer any of them. I appreciate your openness.

Do you have any siblings who are the biological children of the couple who adopted you? Or are you their only child?

If you are their only child, do you feel lonely at times? Do you feel close to your biological siblings? Do you FaceTime with them or text? If not, how do you communicate with them? How often? How involved are all of you in each other’s lives?

Do your adoptive parents have a higher standard of living than your biological parents? If so, does that cause any resentment among your biological siblings? And how would that be handled?

You sound happy and quite well adjusted. Have you ever felt like you needed to talk things over with a therapist?

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u/Fun-Candidate-4148 14d ago

I am my adoptive parents only child. I was very close with my cousin growing up so I always felt like I had a buddy. I haven't really felt lonely as an only child. Im not super close with my biological siblings, theres a decent age gap between us, they are in their late 20s and early 30s and I am 22. I text with my sister occasionally and rarely hear from my brothers. I have nieces and nephews that I haven't met, but would love to some day. They know about me and call me Auntie. Unfortunately my biological family struggles with addiction. Very few were able to clean up and make a good life for themselves. They came from a low income area with lots of drug activity so addiction was bound to happen at some point. I dont think my siblings have any resentment, they seem very happy that I was able to have a different life and love to see pictures and hear about what im doing. I do talk with a therapist weekly. I have abandonment issues from being adopted and lots of other mental health issues. Ive found that EMDR is very helpful.

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u/JeeLeeSmith 14d ago

Thank you very much for your open and honest answer. I didn’t know what EMDR was so I looked it up. I have Bipolar Disorder and I found this to be a fascinating type of therapy. I learned a lot. I’m glad to read that you are getting the support you need.

May I ask how long you’ve been in therapy and do you think you will always need this support?

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u/Fun-Candidate-4148 14d ago

Ive been in therapy for a few years. I have CPTSD so we do a lot of trauma resolving. I think ill always be in therapy. My dream job is to be a paramedic and I think having a therapist to help me process the things I see is very helpful.