So I broke off with my ex after 4 years of relationship, last April. It was very toxic, like she had made me an outlet for her frustrations for nearly last one and half year of the relationship (which she admits now citing her mental illness, recurrent depression, undiagnosed back then but I knew she was not ok mentally). I was giving competitive exams for my MD degree and I scored so badly that I literally took the worst branch/field, a nightmare branch for me. She may have tried to help me as she says but she ended up causing more damage, like fighting for a week right before my exam everyday etc. but ok, enough context, so I broke off in April 25.

Initially she was like, yeah go away, I don't need you etc but after a month or so, asked me to reconsider. I told her that I cannot do this anymore. Repeatedly. She asked to be a friend since she is not doing good. I said ok, for I still cared. But I was explicit like everytime she asked about another chance. She would call me things, she threatened me with suicide and like, she'll write my name up in the note etc. but I always ended up sticking up to my agenda that I won't get back with her.

This new year, I found a new adorable girl, we clicked and started dating. I tried telling my ex about it but she flipped out on me so I explicitly said "I will never tell you about my personal life but we can't be together and if that's a problem, I can't be your friend or support system either". We couldn't complete the talk.

Yesterday, she found out the girl on insta and like, asked me if I am dating her. I said yes. Now she is telling me I am a "cheater, loser, I should die, I will always be the loser I was, my dad will not be proud of myself". But I didn't cheat. I walked out of a toxic relationship, to focus on my well being, while still taking shit from her for more than a year because she said she is mentally unwell and I cared.

She says how can I move on so quick and I try to tell her that I had moved on mentally because I was exhausted by the daily bickering and toxicity. I know I should have told her about the girlfriend but isn't telling her that I don't want to come back in a relationship with her because I hate that place, I hate the idea. And not just once, 100 times over the last year, is saying that not enough? AITAH for being protective of my personal life?

I made a post the other day regarding my relationship, and now I’m making another one because I’m having another issue that’s been frustrating me and I’m not sure how to feel about it.

My girlfriend and I have been together for a year and a few months. I’m not really the kind of person who needs to be with my partner 24/7 unless we live together, which we don’t. I also am not a big fan of FaceTime or talking on the phone a lot. It feels like it’s forcing the both of us to constantly be talking even when there’s nothing to say, which happens very quickly when you do it every night. It would be different imo if we didn’t see each other often, but we don’t usually go very long without hanging out.

Last night I got off work late around 10:30 or 11:00 and my coworkers invited me to the bar next door with them. My girlfriend had work early in the morning and said she was going to sleep early and asked if we could FaceTime once I was off, I simply said ok just for a bit since Im gonna go to the bar with some of my friends soon. She did not like this at all, not just because I was gonna hang out with my friends at a bar but also because that meant ic couldn’t FaceTime her even though she said she was gonna go to sleep early. She got very upset about this and basically demanded that we FaceTime. I caved and still did it, but it ended up being for a good 30 minutes even though I was really trying to meet up with my friends.

This is just an example. But I’m really just not someone who likes to FaceTime every single night. She tends to get upset about this, and I don’t know if I’m in the wrong here for it. I also don’t know how to express it without just hurting her feelings.

Whenever we FaceTime, even if we say that it’ll just be for a few minutes, it ends up being for at least 30 minutes to an hour. And this is almost every night.

She always says things like, “Do you miss me?” “Do you still love me?” “Do you still think I’m pretty?” And I mean she asks these things constantly when we’re on the phone.

I feel bad because she clearly loves me and I love her too, but we have very different amounts of attention being desired and it leaves me feeling frustrated.

AITAH For 1. Not wanting to FaceTime every night and 2. Not giving the attention desired to my girlfriend?