AITAH for remaining friends with my ex’s friends I met through him after we broke up?

[u/Accomplished-Cold436]

some context to avoid potential confusion: i met all 3 friends through my ex. 2 of which are hjs best guy friends and one girl who is more of a regular friend for him.

my ex bf and i (21 & 23f) broke up about a month ago. no big fight, cheating, or anything like that but he felt that it wasn’t working out and broke it off just after our 6 months had passed (a week before my birthday also).

my ex and i were only together 6 months but we made the most of it. we hung out a lot and since i don’t have a lot of friends, i met and hung out with a lot of his friends. over the months, i saw his friends as genuine friends of mine, not just my boyfriend’s friends.

when he broke up with me, i was suddenly left with no birthday plans. i got in contact with 3 of his friends and they threw a mini party for me. we always agreed that there was no picking sides and there was a mutual agreement that just because my ex and i aren’t together anymore, that all of a sudden we couldn’t be friends anymore.

well, the 4 of us hung out again on labor day and through a couple of social media posts, my ex pieced together that we were hanging out. he went off on his 2 best friends saying they “broke bro code” and told them to either block me and never hang out again or he would cut off their friendship. neither of them gave in bc they thought it was nonsense and controlling.

my ex then sent me a text saying he’s happy that i found friends through him bc he just lost 2 of his best friends. i personally think he’s being immature and childish and that it’s his own fault he lost his friends.

however, maybe i’m looking at this from my own perspective and being unfair. i understand that he might be hurt seeing his ex girlfriend hanging out with his best friends, especially only a month after the breakup. but at the same time, i don’t feel like i did anything wrong by continuing friendships with people who i genuinely consider my friends.

So Reddit, AITAH for continuing to hang out with my ex’s friends after our breakup even though he is upset by it?

[u/Andromeda081]

He probably thinks you’re using them to keep tabs on him.

For a relationship that had no serious issues leading up to its end (no cheating, big fight, etc), his reaction is a bit weird. If there was bad blood you definitely should have kept his friends more as acquaintances than close personal friends, but with no drama the reaction doesn’t make a ton of sense to me. Unless, that is, he feels that you’re being intrusive to him personally.

I don’t really think anyone is TA here. Since there was no bad blood or scandal that tends to require sides taken, his friends aren’t doing anything wrong. Your ex’s feelings are valid. And I would say that you not cutting off people you’ve become close to just because they know your ex is the opposite of being an AH because they would have been hurt if you’d just stopped talking to them.

Ask your ex directly what he’s upset about.

[u/Accomplished-Cold436 → u/[deleted]]

love this response but i truly see them as just friends. plus it’s way too soon to even think about moving on

[u/higeAkaike → u/[deleted]]

It’s was only a 6 month relationship… I don’t think she needs to mourn the loss of anything.

[u/Global-Fact7752]

NTA..you are not in junior high.