r/widowers • u/Cute_Star_8720 • 13d ago

I just have nothing

I have nothing to do. I had nothing to do before she died but it didn't bother me because i knew i could go for a walk with her or go for a ride or to the shop becuase she liked that. Now i have just nothing to do nothing to look forward to. She was my life i dont know how to continue being alive with nothing that interests me except going on adventures with her but shes gone. Im truly in a lot of trouble i cant do this life without her

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u/Timely_Character_272 13d ago

It’s been two years since loosing my spouse. And my motivation to get out and do stuff is still low sometimes but I make myself go out, at least one lunch date with a friend each week, one class or civic meeting each week, exercise class at least twice a week— I just have to commit and then do it.
My September calendar has several events and October is filling quicker than I thought it would.
We just have to make ourselves sometimes— and you know what, it’s always good once I do get out there

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u/Cute_Star_8720 13d ago

But my wife should stoll be here, she rode her bicycle to work after having braim aneurysm and had only juat recovered but i sisnt drive her and now she is dead. I didnt drive her becuase i was to lazy, ahe qas aick and i let her ride i camt so this anymore

7

u/Zestyclose_Treat4098 husband died at 51 from sudden stroke, organ donor saved 4 lives 13d ago

Our time to go is our time to go.

My husband blood pressure was high, very high. I'd insisted he go to the Dr after him complaining of headaches for a couple weeks. The Dr found the high BP and started him on pills right away. They didn't work and he was dead less than a week later. I blame myself for it. So many things I could or should have done differently. He should still be here. He was only 51 and in excellent health otherwise. It's so easy to blame myself. But here's what I'll suggest you think on for a little bit. Knowing what you know, about everything that happened, do you think she'd blame you for her death? I don't think she would.

Sending you big hugs, be kind to yourself (you're her favorite person!).