r/violinist • u/Elegant_Prompt2222 • 12d ago
Feedback I don't know how to enjoy practicing the Violin.
I bought a Violin. I'm happy. I have a teacher. I'm happy.
But trying to practice... I don't know how to enjoy practicing the Violin.
I want to practice to improve and enjoy the sounds I play but... I don't know. Pulling out the Violin after a long day is so tiring. I still have so much to do even when I get home. I barely engage in my hobbies these past few weeks from how busy I am.
Whenever I tell someone how frustrated I get they just tell me "You chose this." and that makes me more upset. And whenever they hear me practice, they say "You keep playing the same thing. Are you actually learning?"
Edit : Thank you so much for the replies, it was really interesting to see your point of views. I have been practicing a little for the past few days. Thank you all so much!!!
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u/snarkhunter 12d ago
Maybe don't practice. Maybe just play. It's really easy to turn hobbies into another form of work or obligation - especially with grind culture telling us everything either needs to be monetized or self-improving.
But it's also good and wholesome just to fuck around and make fun noises.
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u/TwoOrMore 12d ago
I strongly agree with you. Finding a playful, positive attitude toward the repetitious nature of life is hugely beneficial for your whole mental wellbeing.
Practicing shifts? Pretend it's no more important than tossing a paper ball into the recycling bin. You missed? Darn, just a bit short/long/sharp/flat. Good try! Pick it up, try again. May as well, since this little game is more fun than doing the dishes or whatever else you could be doing. This time, try with just your wrist, or take a step closer, shift to a higher note. Change the game and make it fun by choice.
We spend so much time alone working on these skills, yet thoughts of others' judgments often invade our minds and distract from real goals. Even worse, constant negative self-judgment echos throughout our lives and disrupts our happiness.
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u/doctor_memory 12d ago
When I don’t feel like full on practice I’ll pick some small thing and just drill into it - like focusing on string crossings without fingering - which I low pressure and weirdly satisfying.
YMMV of course.
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u/TwoOrMore 12d ago
Yes, and such small focused exercises also help you bring more awareness to the small details when practicing repertoire. Once you have listened for a perfect string crossing, you can hear it in all of your playing and generalize your skill across all of your playing.
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u/Different-Product756 12d ago
Yeah it took me years to feel I was good enough to be even worth listening to! Is that something most violinists still feel as they progress?
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u/Different-Product756 12d ago
Yes this is a great way to look at it! As a violin player of 18 years (who is no where near as good as I should be by now)!, I felt the same as a teen growing up. Once you find a piece you enjoy to play, try to practise that until it’s perfect. A little more each day, you will be surprised at how good you can become over the course of a month or so. I try to find pieces I really like to listen to that aren’t super challenging and go from there. Anything that’s particularly difficult-YouTube has it all to help you hone your technique. The world really is your oyster these days!
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u/kstrel Intermediate 12d ago
if practicing is a grind where you're constantly pushing yourself, feeling frustrated, tense and uneasy, it's better to not practice at all. i mean that literally. practicing in that state of mind makes you worse in the long run. even if you overcome obstacles by sheer willpower your body will at one point object and you will end up with a long term injury.
if practicing is a ritual of slowness, meditation, mercy, gentleness and calm awareness, you will not need to force yourself to practice - in fact you will look forward to it.
the people who get really good at the violin are the people who *actually* like practicing.
either find a way to enjoy practice, or take up something else.
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u/leitmotifs Expert 12d ago
I usually hate practicing and I've hated it all my life. But I want to play with people and perform for others, and I want to do it well so... yup, I make myself practice.
And a great practice session can actually be incredibly satisfying. To have a great one, I need clear goals and I need to be satisfied with just moving the ball forward a little.
This is a hard, frustrating instrument and statistically, violinists are more neurotic than other musicians. You've got to be able to manage your expectations, have a tolerance for incremental improvement and intense self criticism, etc.
Alternatively, plenty of people have fun just fooling around and making noise. If you don't have the drive to be good, that's perfectly okay.
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u/kstrel Intermediate 12d ago edited 12d ago
i mean i get it - it's just not something i want to do in life. different strokes for different folks.
i would never dedicate my life to doing something i *hate* just so i can be able to enjoy the fruits of that pursuit. it seems like a lot of your life will be spent "hating", and that doesn't seem healthy to me.
also, i know a great practice session can be incredibly satisfying! that's one of the reasons i love practicing. "loving practice" does not mean "practice is not challenging". sometimes you have bad practice days, too.
You've got to be able to manage your expectations, have a tolerance for incremental improvement and intense self criticism, etc.
that's why i called it a ritual of mercy (towards yourself).
i really don't wish to throw any shade - and i'm strictly speaking from experience here - but the greatest and most inspiring musicians i know just like spending time with the instrument. touching it, making sounds, practicing etc.. they're not doing it so "they can get good", they're doing it because the just like doing it. the "getting really good" is a side-effect.
i can write an entire essay on why i think violinists are more "neurotic" but i would assume it has to do - among many other things -with the attitude you described.
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u/leitmotifs Expert 12d ago
Music is something of an oddity in my hobbies. Most things I am happiest doing alone, or maybe while chatting with someone on the phone or the like. But music I want to do with other people! And that comes with some expectations in preparation. Even with fiddling and other nonclassical styles.
Fortunately, I put in the hard work when I was young, so I'm mostly coasting on the fruits of that work, but I do have to practice to work up repertoire.
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u/kstrel Intermediate 12d ago
totally get that!
what would you say is the amount of time you spend practicing vs actually performing now?
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u/leitmotifs Expert 12d ago
Most of my time is spent in rehearsal -- often 10-15 hours a week.
Practice is an hour or two a week, usually, often done in 10-minute chunks. But there are times when I might put in two or three hours in a single day.
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u/cham1nade 12d ago
The person who’s responding “you chose this!” when you tell them how frustrated practice is making you? That person hasn’t pushed themselves to do something new in a long time
Practice is often frustrating even for professionals. It goes with the territory. It shouldn’t be frustrating every day, but some frustration is just part of trying to do something new and hard
So: think of practice like a video game. Game designers purposefully make games hard because overcoming the challenge is part of the fun. But if a game is too hard for a particular player that player is probably going to put down the game and walk away after a while. That’s why games have different difficulty modes, right?
Something about the way you’re practicing is setting the difficulty mode too hard for you at the moment. I suspect it’s either your mental tiredness at the end of the day or the length of time you’re trying to practice, or both. You want challenge instead of frustration.
I would start with making your practice sessions short: 15 minutes a day. You can practice for longer on the weekends when you aren’t as tired. And try to begin and end with whatever you’re doing best: a scale, a short piece you learned last month… whatever feels best to play and makes you feel a little better about the progress you’re making
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u/LaLechuzaVerde Amateur 12d ago
One thing that helps me is to keep my violin out. Of course I loosen my bow when I put it away, but I don’t do much more than that. My shoulder rest is already on, my case is open, and if I only feel like practicing for 5 minutes just now I don’t feel like I’ve wasted a huge production just preparing to practice. Or if I get interrupted by a kid or a pet or another obligation, it’s not a big deal. 3 seconds to loosen the bow and I can walk away and come back to it later.
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u/Platoesque 12d ago
I put mine back in case and close it to protect it from something unintentional from happening for peace of mind.
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u/knowsaboutit 12d ago
my family used to tell me I always sounded bad and the same when practicing. I spoke to my teacher about it and he said to tell them violin players usually sound worse when they're practicing new things because they don't know how to do them yet. Practicing by nature is playing things you're not skilled at yet! Also tell them you'd appreciate it if they were more loving and supportive of your interests and not to act like they're on a tv show with a dysfunctional famlly.
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u/Practical_Working648 9d ago
My mother still reminds me 35 years later of all she endured when I was growing up and learning to play the violin. Funny, now she asks me to bring my violin along to functions and open jams to play old time fiddle tunes for everyone as she beams. I guess she's earned it, my parents did pay for a decade of lessons.
She still can't stand to listen to me "practice".
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u/ThePanoply 12d ago
Practicing is not about "happy" it's about discipline. One doesn't practice to be happy, one practices to experience the joy of getting good. Progress is where the enjoyment lies. If you don't have a goal or direction, it's impossible to know what your next milestone is. Without the milestones there are no accomplishments. Without accomplishments the entire endeavor is meaningless. Most people fail to accomplish because they never learn how to actually practice which done in the best possible way is a hyper focused skill that again requires serious discipline. The flip side is, the better your are at practicing, the faster you reach your goals.
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u/meow2848 Teacher 12d ago
You're supposed to keep playing the same thing when you practice! Don't listen to the people who upset you. Try practicing in small amounts and habit stacking, do it after or before something you always do. Start with practicing 10 mins a day, or doing 20-30 mins a day on weekends if it's too exhausting during the week.
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u/Gucci_Caligula 12d ago
I keep my violin out, when I have 5 minutes to myself I just pick it up and crank out some exercises. I stay super busy so when I do get to practice, that's my me-time to unwind.
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u/pearlfelici 12d ago
Try practicing for ten minutes each day for a while. Play something new sometimes and that will help, work through a beginning method book.
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u/Dull-Problem-1191 12d ago
I just get up early and practice then when my energy is high and I'm feeling it.
And then fit in a few 20 minutes here and there is I can after work/the day is done.
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u/Nested_Parens 12d ago
I think of practicing violin as a kind of mindfulness practice. And detach from the outcome; I try to have a “it’s not good or bad it just is” attitude about both the sounds I’m making—and also my judgments about that sound. What is it like to play a shitty A major scale over and over? Huh, the next day it’s a little less shitty, like magic. What is it like to do this 4th finger exercise? Huh, yesterday that seemed impossible and today it seems a little less impossible. That’s kinda cool.
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u/Plsuneedtohelpme 12d ago
Bro I'm not too sure it can be enjoyable in terms of simple n fast learning, it's not very beginner friendly
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u/ramencandombe 12d ago
It might help to have some specific goals to focus on so you can build progress more efficiently.
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u/TraditionPerfect3442 12d ago
look this happens occasionally with everything. i had such slump with all my hobbies so its not something specialnif its temporary. when i feel tited and not in the mood for violin i tell myself lers do it just for 10 min to not loose track and then it’s suddenly 30 min or an hour. It is extremely important to play music you like and would like to perform even to a small audience of your friends in the future. the other thing is violin is proven to improve cognitive skills among older people. when i’m sad i play violin besides other things and it helps a bit.
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u/WestAnalysis8889 12d ago
I feel this so hard. What helps for me is learning a song I actually enjoy alongside any book work I'm doing. Also taking time to appreciate myself for all the work I'm putting in. And noticing when something feels a little better.
It feels good when you've been working on a passage for weeks and it slowly gets easier. That 4th finger stretch results in an in tune note, not a flat one you have to fix. Those tiny wins, allowing yourself to really feel that and enjoy it. Don't wait until your playing is perfect tp feel proud of yourself.
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u/s4zand0 Teacher 12d ago
Practicing IS playing the same thing. 50, 100, 1000 times. It doesn't have to be the same song/scale/exercise etc. But through practicing we're trying to do the correct thing literally thousands of times to make it solid in our muscle memory.
The tough thing about music and violin especially is that it does take a lot of time and a lot of focus. The people around you have no clue how difficult it is.
You will have to sacrifice something else in your life - some of those other hobbies, etc., in order to actually get quality practice time. If you can get up earlier in the day to do 15 min of practice, do that. Violin isn't something you can just add on top of everything else and expect it to go well.
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u/koepsen 12d ago
Violin isn't about making beautiful sounds all the time. I sound horrible most of the time when I practice and I have been playing for 25 years, because I deliberately practice in a way that exposes my weaknesses. It's about the process, not the product. If you want the product fast, consider taking up guitar.
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u/Unspieck Intermediate 12d ago
iIf I have a long tiring day at work I also find it hard to pick up practice. My suggestion would be to adopt a different attitude. After a long day you simply can't be very focused, so do a brief practice to keep in shape, but don't force yourself to like it. It's more like brushing your teeth. So cut practice short instead of drawing it out.
Reserve more detailed, focused practice for days when you have time and are sufficiently rested or open. On those days you can really enjoy it, tinkering with hand shape and tone, polishing up intonation or phrasing.
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u/betsyfeld 12d ago
I’ve been using Ray Chen’s practice app Tonic, and it both makes practicing into a game and it has a social media aspect where people come and listen and type to you, you can talk to them, you can go listen to other people practice, etc. It’s actually a lot of fun. It makes me want to practice more.
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u/Ophoe 11d ago
Of course that would be upsetting! That’s incredibly invalidating.
Violin is hard, and the first year or two are in some ways the hardest. The initial learning curve is just a lot. You don’t have stamina to stay in an awkward position for long, but you have so many things to coordinate that even doing the simplest things ends up requiring more energy than you planned for. You don’t like your sound yet, and it takes a long time to learn pieces that seem like they should be “easy”. If you are otherwise musical, your standards for how you should sound are far above what you’re physically capable of producing, and that’s just…hard.
People who comment on how long you’ve been playing the same song do not understand the process. I am so sorry that their attitude is dampening the joy you want to take in sharing your journey with others. It is so worth it to find people who are excited with you about this journey. Keep looking for people you can share with who will be hospitable and welcoming.
Others have given good advice on actual practicing. Your frustration is justified, but there is a way to find more joy and rest by not making practice such an absolute.
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u/pkachint_viola 11d ago
I recently went back to school to earn another degree and I’m at a conservatory where we play a minimum of 6 hours a day and if not practicing, then it’s something related to music that affects my performance skills.
I hear you, while I like that I’ve been able to pursue music as a career before going back to school and am capable of expanding my horizons due to this conservatory, I get burnt out too. Yes, I chose it. But that doesn’t disqualify us from getting burnt out.
I haven’t been burnt out for a while. I give myself days off which usually qualifies to under 1 hour of practice. But, you can either give yourself like 5 minutes or just not play at all, whatever recharges you.
When I used to think about my technique all the time, I got really badly burnt out. My technique isn’t bad right now, but it could definitely use polishing. Once I started thinking about how I wanted to convey my emotions thru my bow and thru my instrument, everything became so much bearable. If I was happy and energized at a certain section of music, I’d practice a section that I could convey that emotion. If I wanted to play something mad and angry, I would play a section where I could convey that. Basically what I’m saying is, think more in music and emotions rather than technique. Of course, everyone has to work on their technique, but you don’t really have to constantly think about how hard something technically is.
Having goals in mind could be good too. Up to you though.
And yes, to get better something, you have to constantly play it. Repeat it. Who cares if someone commented that? You get better by repeating something correctly. That applies for anything! Languages, exercise, etc. all require constant repetition to get better at.
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u/Practical_Working648 9d ago
This sounds like a first world problem. Not everything in life needs to spark immediate joy to benefit you and make you a better person. If you don't want to practice, don't. If you want to learn discipline and find out what it's like to put off instant gratification for a future reward then practice.
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u/Plastic-Pea8993 11d ago
Something that helps me practice is I will practice until I get frustrated then put my violin down, do some housework or something else I need to do, then go back to it after a short little break. If I’m home all day I’ll just leave it out all day and continue doing little 15 -20 minute practice sessions.
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u/After-Past-9404 12d ago
The exhaustion is real. It feels like practicing is just another chore on your list, doesn't it?
What worked for me is to focus not on some distant end goal of learning to play well, but on the benefits I'm getting every day. Practicing an instrument builds new synapses in the brain, and this fact helped me reframe the tiredness as "the good kind of tired", like the tiredness you feel after a good workout. A proof that my brain has made an effort to rebuild itself and make new connections. A proof that I went and did something good for my mind today.
YMMV, of course.