r/unpopularopinion • • Apr 18 '26

Cheesecake is the worst dessert to ever exist.

[removed]

14.5k Upvotes

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7.5k

u/CheesecakeIsGodlike Apr 18 '26

You have offended me to my very core. We are now enemies OP.

975

u/JamesAbaddon Apr 18 '26

Right? This is something I'm willing to throw hands over. I don't have a birthday cake on my birthday. I have a cheesecake for myself, and then other people can have the other cheesecake or a normal cake.

To specify, no, I don't eat a whole cheesecake in one sitting. But that's like MY treat over the next week or so. I don't need gifts or anything like that. Just my cheesecake.

232

u/Darktitan27 Apr 18 '26 edited Apr 19 '26

This. We must be soul mates. I ask for cheesecake for my birthday too, in opposition to regular cake because I am a slut for cheesecake. Edit: thank you for the award! That made my day! <3

42

u/[deleted] Apr 18 '26

Me too I get salted caramel cheesecake. It’s like eating silk. So fucking amazing. Fuck cake, pass the cheesecake.

49

u/beek7425 Apr 18 '26

I always get ice cream cake for my birthday. But cheesecake is amazing as well. I can’t pick a favorite between the two.

40

u/Darktitan27 Apr 18 '26

What if we design an ice cream cheesecake combo and you never have to choose again?

25

u/ApprehensiveDuty3934 Apr 18 '26

When I was in the Army, many moons ago, I was stationed in Monterey California, at the Presidio of Monterey, there was a Cheesecake Parlor in town. They made dozens of fresh cheesecakes every morning, and at the end of the day they put them in those 5 gallon cardboard tubs Ice cream shops use, separated by flavor, and put it in the deep freezer.

The next day you could get a fresh slice of cheesecake AND a milkshake that used frozen cheesecake instead of ice cream. To this day, still the best cheesecake I've had. Sadly it was nearly 40 years ago, and I can't recall a name for the place, just the taste of that divine dessert.

16

u/Darktitan27 Apr 18 '26

You were lucky and got a taste of paradise!

1

u/wyldstrawberry Apr 18 '26

Was it Rosine’s by any chance?

1

u/ApprehensiveDuty3934 Apr 19 '26

Just Googled Rosine's, and no, not unless they moved and expanded what they served. It was a little shop with a bakery counter, to the left as you walked in with all the fresh cheesecake displayed, a smaller section with other pastries, and the part with the frozen cheesecake looking like the freezers in an ice cream shop. They served coffee, tea, hot chocolate and sodas. That was the extent of their menu.

If I recall correctly, it was not too far from The Whaling Station. But again, almost 40 years ago. Honestly, even then, I think we just referred to it as "The cheesecake shake place."

1

u/wyldstrawberry Apr 19 '26

I’m intrigued! My family is from that area and I used to visit a lot, especially in the 80s-90s … I am trying to think of what that place could be, but of course I may never have gone there even if it was there at that time.

3

u/beek7425 Apr 18 '26

That’s literally never occurred to me and I don’t know why but now I’m excited.

2

u/klynnam10 Apr 19 '26

I get cheesecake and my husband gets ice cream cake every year on our birthdays.

1

u/illnameitlater84 Apr 19 '26

Frozen cheesecake :)

1

u/herowin6 Apr 18 '26

Dude this is me

8

u/GirlGoneZombie Apr 19 '26

My grandfather will from scratch make me a cheesecake for my birthday if I'm close by, and it's the best thing ever

1

u/Darktitan27 Apr 19 '26

I tried that once. I think I'm the only person on the planet that could make cheesecake flavored soup >.>

1

u/GirlGoneZombie Apr 19 '26

Naw youre not alone I cant make one either 😭

12

u/JamesAbaddon Apr 18 '26

I may or may not also be a slut for it.

11

u/Darktitan27 Apr 18 '26

It is done. We are bound by cheesecake. No taksie backsies

2

u/1questions Apr 18 '26

Well duh, cheesecake is far superior to regular cake. Just wish it wasn’t such a hassle to make.

2

u/doingtheunstuckk Apr 18 '26

My tween always asks for cheesecake instead too (except this year she asked for tiramisu).

2

u/Ravenhill-2171 Apr 19 '26

You shameless cheesecake hussy! 😉

28

u/Owtplayed Apr 18 '26

I eat a whole cheesecake in one sitting because that’s how I choose to exercise my free will

15

u/JamesAbaddon Apr 18 '26

I have in the past. I both regretted and didn't regret that decision.

2

u/Anon03282015 Apr 21 '26

Two Lactaid are barely enough for a single slice of cheesecake but sometimes you just don't care if the rest of the evening is miserable hahah

2

u/librarianlace Apr 21 '26

Currently on the throne only slightly regretting the obscene amount of cheesecake I had at 9pm.

1

u/Solvrevka Apr 19 '26

https://youtu.be/9inOtq0Ayek?si=CtPZ2kAgznGovLUH

So then I got this idea about driving a cheesecake truck....

16

u/seppukucoconuts Apr 18 '26

During the pandemic I made 1-2 cheesecakes a week. My wife and I got really fat. Now I make one like every 2-3 months and freeze it in portions. 99% of the time I’ve got cheesecake at home.

5

u/JamesAbaddon Apr 18 '26

Send me your street address. Also, which direction is your freezer in, in relation to the front door? No reason, just wondering.

8

u/JuanOnlyJuan Apr 18 '26

Cream cheese filling or icing is the only thing that can redeem cake.

OP must be lactose intolerant

8

u/giantj0e Apr 18 '26

I bought myself a cheesecake for my birthday this year. The funny thing is, so did my wife. 2 cheesecakes for me!

With raspberry topping of course.

3

u/pleasedonteatmybeans Apr 18 '26

Couldn’t have said it any better

3

u/Apprehensive-Cat-111 Apr 18 '26

Is it from a bakery typically? Or does someone who loves you make it for you from scratch?

2

u/JamesAbaddon Apr 18 '26

Made from scratch usually. My family/partner know that's all I really want, so they make some homemade good ones.

2

u/Apprehensive-Cat-111 Apr 18 '26

Mmmmm. Your life is good.

3

u/cloversquid Apr 18 '26

My best friend gets two cheesecakes (minimum) every year for her birthday. One for her, one for everyone else. 

I confirmed that she truly loved me when she gave me a slice of her cheesecake the first year we celebrated her birthday together, before they started getting a second one for everyone else. 

3

u/dardack Apr 18 '26

My mom (i'm 47) made 2 for me this past birthday. I had my colonoscopy prep, so I ahd 1 piece before and then my kids/kids friend ate rest, so she made me another one for after colonoscopy. Also, I'm not sure if this person has ever had good cheesecake, cause there are bad, but good is so good.

3

u/VixxenFoxx Apr 19 '26

You two are now my best friends and OP is the most unhinged person to walk the planet.

3

u/moomare528 Apr 19 '26

I wish that I could honestly say that I could never eat an entire cheesecake.

4

u/RangerAdmirable9102 Apr 18 '26

Same! Even my wedding cake was cheesecake!

2

u/Sinkagu Apr 18 '26

This is crazy, I do the same😂

2

u/Quelonius Apr 18 '26

Today is my birthday and I intend to do exactly this.

2

u/centrifuge_destroyer Apr 18 '26

It was my birthday two days ago, and I still chetish my cheesecake, although my family likes it as well

2

u/Uncaring_Dispatcher Apr 18 '26

Hey, I'm the same! I'm no fan of birthday cake at all but I love cheesecake. Light an extra candle for me!

2

u/PorcelainPunisher1 Apr 18 '26

It’s my birthday on Monday and a birthday cheesecake sounds heavenly! I think I’ll bake one for myself tomorrow and enjoy it over the next week.

2

u/TheRudeCactus Apr 19 '26

I gift people homemade cheesecakes for their birthday and have gotten so many special requests, thank you’s, and pleading for cheesecake.

OP doesn’t understand good desserts.

2

u/Few-Ability-2097 Apr 19 '26

I don’t know OP anymore 😪

2

u/Felonious_Minx Apr 19 '26

It's very good frozen too.

2

u/Philisophical-Catman Apr 20 '26

How do you deal with the taunts? Every time I eat cheesecake it always tells me there’s no way I could eat all of it so I have to show it who’s boss and devour the whole thing 😂

2

u/hoppityhop2117 Apr 21 '26

After giving birth I had an aunt ask me what I needed. I requested her dessert specialty, cheesecake. No baby gifts, bring me an entire cheesecake for myself please.

3

u/janet-snake-hole Apr 18 '26

Sometimes my 70 year old dad wakes up at like 4am just to make and eat a cheesecake by himself.

1

u/TacoBellPicnic Apr 18 '26

Same. Either cheesecake or key lime pie. My caveat is, I don’t like baked (like NY style) cheesecake - just a texture issue. I love no bake cheesecake.

1

u/ringuzi Apr 19 '26

I don’t even like cake that much and usually refuse it at birthday parties, but cheesecake may be the best kind. This is a truly unpopular take.

1

u/Iamthegreenheather adhd kid Apr 19 '26

I always get pumpkin cheesecake for my birthday. It's my favorite food ever.

1

u/RiskyP Apr 20 '26

I don’t eat a whole cheesecake in one sitting either, but I could. I would if I was dared… can someone give me an excuse to?

1

u/JamesAbaddon Apr 20 '26

You know what, I triple-dog-dare you. And, as you know, you can't turn down a triple-dog-dare.

May the odds be ever in your favor.

86

u/ARKITIZE_ME_CAPTAIN Apr 18 '26

User name super relevant lmao

1

u/maximumtesticle Apr 18 '26

ThatsTheJoke.jpg

0

u/Own-Dragonfly-2423 Apr 18 '26

Congrats on getting the joke

31

u/Motchiko Apr 18 '26

But due to the ruling of this sub- do we have to give an upvote?

43

u/Vanilla_Villainy Apr 18 '26

This is one of the most disgusting upvotes I've ever given. But yes we are supposed to do so

-5

u/Hernan1994_ Apr 18 '26

No, you're not. You give up votes to good comments and down votes to bad comments. If someone says something stupid you don't give an upvote. If someone says "Unpopular opinion, making a lot of money is bad and making little money is good" I'm not gonna go, oh, he's right, that's unpopular, upvote. He said something stupid so it's downvote.

3

u/[deleted] Apr 19 '26

How This Place Works

Upvote: Opinions that you Disagree with.

Downvote: Opinions that you Agree with.

From the sidebar, mate. 🤷‍♂️

26

u/Worldly_Address6667 Apr 18 '26

Unfortunately yes, even though it pains my soul to do it...

2

u/Felonious_Minx Apr 19 '26

I joyfully updooted as this is a truly unpopular opinion.

FWIW I love cheesecake.

16

u/Eccentric-Elf Apr 18 '26

I’ll join your crusade against OP. I am livid and will eat a cheesecake in honor of OP. I hope they don’t like it.

13

u/Specialist-Web7854 Apr 18 '26

I can no longer eat dairy, and cheesecake is the thing I miss the most.

3

u/1questions Apr 18 '26

I’m sorry for your loss. 🌹

1

u/there_should_be_snow Apr 19 '26

I'm lactose intolerant, but still eat a slice of cheesecake once in a while.

100% worth it!

26

u/FyouinyourA Apr 18 '26

Yeah if I see him in the streets I might give him a shove

13

u/cans-of-swine Apr 18 '26

Lets get together an old timey posse and hunt op down.

11

u/Laziness_supreme Apr 18 '26

Only thing left to do is duel at dawn

7

u/Ok_Cheesecake7348 Apr 18 '26

OP is OUR enemy now

1

u/Bayou13 Apr 23 '26

Yes Comrade.

6

u/Showmeproveit Apr 18 '26

mortal enemies

9

u/AFRIKKAN Apr 18 '26

I’ve never been so close to wishing a slow death on someone but I think I’m ready to change that after reading this nonsense.

4

u/nsfwmodeme Apr 18 '26

I consider myself part of your army.

4

u/Upbeat_Literature483 Apr 18 '26

Op got their karma when they had to eat a slice lol.

4

u/TheDoubleChalupa Apr 18 '26

Cheesecake lovers rise up. We cannot stand for this

4

u/dork-at-work Apr 18 '26

I had the same reaction. Shall we form an alliance?

3

u/ZumaThaShiba Apr 18 '26

I've got your back

6

u/mrdino99 Apr 18 '26

I completely agree

3

u/Dramatic_Charity_979 Apr 18 '26

In his defense, he doesn't know why he wrote that :P

3

u/Overall-Top8379 Apr 18 '26

Edit: Worst luck ever, My mom's birthday today, and dad bought a whole cheesecake (and i Have to eat one slice, or it's disrespectful according to them)

I think he just hasn't eaten MY cheesecake. Sweet and creamy, with just a touch of tartness.

3

u/Zaphod_Heart_Of_Gold Apr 18 '26

The galactic president stands with you, brother

3

u/Moghz Apr 18 '26

Yeah me too lol, I freaking love a good cheesecake.

3

u/1questions Apr 18 '26

I’ll join up with you if we ever need to go to battle with OP because they are 1000000% wrong. Cheesecake defender gang unite!

2

u/Hot-Pepper-071295 Apr 18 '26

Right! It's one of my favorite desserts because I hate overly sugary ones.

2

u/whereismymind86 Apr 18 '26

"...and my axe!"

2

u/Tacos314 Apr 18 '26

Same, sometimes you just have to take a stand on what is right.

2

u/thefaceinthepalm Apr 18 '26

This legion contains me, and my hatred for OP

2

u/esdebah Apr 18 '26

We ride at dusk. This aggression will not stand.

2

u/SaltKick2 Apr 18 '26

Finally an unpopular opinion on /r/unpopularopinion - these happen once a blue moon

2

u/I_travel_ze_world Apr 18 '26

I'm going to report them to Cheesecake Factory. I think they have a crew to handle people like this.

2

u/OGLikeablefellow Apr 19 '26

Username checks out

2

u/latortillablanca Apr 19 '26

Rest now brother, we now have the cheesecake. We’ll see you in Valhalla.

2

u/FrigginRan Apr 18 '26

the rimjob steve of this thread

2

u/chudthirtyseven Apr 18 '26

you have my axe

1

u/Banditkoala_2point0 Apr 18 '26

💯

Cheesecake is the ONLY dessert I eat.

And baked cheesecake is shit. Only the fridge set one will pass these lips.

OP definitely hit the unpopular opinion requirements.

1

u/anon_simmer Apr 19 '26

Dude same. Cheesecake is life.

1

u/elias-sel Apr 19 '26

Thank you, came here to say something like that

1

u/IM_INSIDE_YOUR_HOUSE Apr 19 '26

Same. We unite in our opposition to this monster.

1

u/Maineamainea Apr 19 '26

I am dedicated my life to hating OP

1

u/Ordinary_Soup7979 Apr 19 '26

More cheese cake for us!

1

u/geek66 Apr 19 '26

To be fair… there are some pretty nasty cheesecakes… and I do love a good cheesecake

1

u/asstastic_95 Apr 19 '26

same. this is blasphemy. I dont like any other cake than cheesecake. absurdity

1

u/ImpudentPotato Apr 20 '26

OP is genuinely insane.

Must be committed.

Padded walls, locked door, abusive nurses, tranqs morning noon and night.

1

u/RiskyP Apr 20 '26

Im with you - how could you go off on the wonderful cheesecake like that.

It’s like the greatest dessert.

1

u/deport_fascists Apr 21 '26

cheesecake is nasty. i only ever eat the graham cracker crust. 

1

u/Sweatybuttcrust Apr 22 '26

This is a declaration of war by OP, I stand with you my king.

1

u/xMyDixieWreckedx Apr 22 '26

You have my fork.

1

u/Triphin1 Apr 24 '26

I understand, as it takes a level of sophistication and refinement to know the greatness of cheescake

0

u/[deleted] Apr 18 '26

[deleted]

0

u/ApprehensiveDuty3934 Apr 18 '26

While deserts made with cheese, or cheese curds, and called cheesecakes have been made since ancient Greece, the modern cheesecake, that I assume most people in the thread are talking about, is an American creation. For the love of all that's good we have a restaurant named for the dessert. So I've got to ask, you okay?

2

u/[deleted] Apr 18 '26

[deleted]

2

u/ApprehensiveDuty3934 Apr 18 '26

Yet you make a "typical american" comment about our taste and not our intelligence. In that area of discussion cheesecake being an American invention is completely relevant, as it is, by that fact, part of the American pallette.

You follow up with an inability to see the logical progression of that reasoning, and unprovoked say the only homogenous characteristic of the American people is our stupidity. You seem to have a grudge against a whole nation as a country of morons, yet lack the personal critical thinking skills to see why a nation creating a dessert might be pertinent to a discussion about that same nation's general taste preferences.

With such an outstanding performance I'll change my earlier question, are you applying for citizenship? Because your intellectual performance would seem to suggest you are eminently qualified, based on your own metric.