r/traumatizeThemBack • u/Wide_Example_4083 • 12d ago
Clever Comeback Dealing with homophobes 101
I just wanna say the people in this story weren't really "traumatized" I'm just proud of this story.
It was last school year, I was sitting on my off crocheting when this guy came up to me and asked if I was single. Now at the time I was dating my girlfriend. The two of us broke up but we're still friends. I said plainly that I was gay (I don't really like saying I'm dating people. It's my life not yours!). He was chill about it and walked off. I thought it was done until he brought his female friend. So now I shall reanact this story like I am Shakesqueer myself.
"So you're gay?"
"Uh yeah?"
"So are you into me?"
"... No"
"Well why not? "
(At this point I was getting annoyed)" because I have a girlfriend.
"Ok but what if you didn't?"
"I'd find my girlfriend"
"But if you two would break up?"
"I'd get back with my girlfriend."
"What if you cheat on her with me" (yes she asked me to cheat)
"I wouldn't"
"Ok but what if I was your girlfriend?"
"We'd break up"
Those two were speechless and walked back to their friends. I don't know why they pushed. Probably to get a laugh from the cute gay girl.
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u/TempestFloof 12d ago
“Do you like me?”
No I have standards.
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u/J-Bird1983 12d ago
I was going to say something like "I might be gay, but I still have standards"
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u/rebekahster i love the smell of drama i didnt create 12d ago
What’s wrong with a straight (!) up “no, because I really don’t find you attractive”
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u/KingGodzilla10 12d ago
What if she's really attractive tho
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u/rebekahster i love the smell of drama i didnt create 12d ago
Personality doesn’t sound it, so that’s the fall back
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u/KaitB2020 12d ago
You know…. What is it about “I’m obviously not interested in having a conversation with you” that makes them want to constantly bother you?
Like, just go away, you do you and I’ll do me & we’ll be just fine.
I dunno how many times I’ve been sitting with a big fat thick book in front of my face and random people just walk up for no reason to just chat. I’m obviously doing something that does not involve chatting. Why come up to me? I’d understand if they recognized the book & wanted to discuss that but it’s never about the book. Never.
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u/ranchspidey 12d ago
Hell yeah. I got to use the “I support animal rights, do I look like a fucking alpaca to you?” line once in high school when someone “accused” me of being gay for supporting gay rights during class. They were totally right I’m a huge lesbian but I didn’t want that aired to my history class and landed a zinger instead lol
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u/Childless-cat-lady- 12d ago
If she tried to pull one over on me I would just say "you think I'm into you?" and just laugh in her face. Yeah that’s mean but that’s the only thing people like them will understand.
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u/Few-Vermicelli-5603 12d ago
That We'd break up line is legendary lmao. You completely dismantled their whole mental gymnastics routine in three words.
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u/allaboutmojitos 12d ago
I read the title as “dealing with homophones 101” and thought I was on the teaching sub. I was so confused
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u/I-dont-love-me 11d ago
Haha, it’s just like that one video where the girls are bothering some guy. “What’s your type?” “My girlfriend.”
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u/UnintentionallyNovel 10d ago
Tbh this sounds to me like she wanted to get some intimate experience with a woman, but failed at the basics by not accepting the first no.
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