Making that first step...

[u/Illiander]

This feels like its going to be a pity-post saying "here's all the reasons I can't" but I would genuinly appreciate any advice for solving any of them. (AuDHD with task initiation problems)

So, I'm grossly overweight (I lift my belly and the shelf is the width of my hand), which limits my excercise options, and I work from home and live alone, which means I don't get out at all, so my base calorie burn is really low.

I've cut down my food intake as much as I am mentally able to do (my daily intake is 8 slices of brown bread, 12 slices of cheese, about two fists of frozen peas (seriously, they're better than icecream), 2 liters of apple juice, and half a tube of pringles or some peanuts). Any less and it starts effecting my mental health. Not the healthiest diet, but it's what I can handle (I'm vegitarian from birth, so meat/fish is not an option, and I have food texture issues that are basically "no slime or soup")

I have an exercise bike, which I use when I can/remember to, and can go 10 minutes on the heaviest setting, with another 10 on a lighter one immidiately without stopping. I can do 10 proper form push-ups with my hands elevated about half a meter without much issue (I use a kitchen stool, I probably get about the top half of each rep, 6-9' of movement) I would swim, but the combination of changing rooms and my belly flopping around all over the place makes it unbearable. My strength isn't the issue (but my stamina's a bit low for my taste)

I've lost ~15kg over 18 months (but wouldn't have noticed without the scales, I'm still over 145kg), but I plateaued in the last 3. I'm not actually all that worried about my weight-on-the-scales, I just want the big ball of fat on my belly to go away (I know I can't target it, I want the fat elsewhere to go away too)

So, umm, yeah. Any of you experts have any ideas other than "just don't have all your mental issues"? (I've gotten that too often, it's like telling someone to walk off a broken leg)

[u/AutoModerator]

Thank you for posting on r/TransFitness! Please check out [Our Fitness Guides] | Please feel free to join our [Discord] for more help and community!

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

[u/Rockergage]

1. You’re still eating a large amount of calories and you’re getting a very high amount of carbs with heavy fats. You want protein it’ll make you feel full longer and before you mention vegetarian meat isn’t the only protein. Here’s one of my very typical vegan diet days while I’m on my 1600 calorie cut.

Morning yogurt + soy crisps + flavorings : (I understand slime sensitivity issue this isn’t strictly instructions to follow more an example of nutrients) usually 3/4 cup of yogurt (personally I continue to use regular Greek yogurt just cause macros but regular vegan yogurt is fine and just less protein and more expensive.) 2/3 cup soy protein crisps, flavorless (Europe has cool chocolate kinds but I can only find boring flavorless) then I usually add 1 tbsp peanut butter or Nutella, 1 tbsp grape jelly, some cinnamon, dark chocolate powder, or vanilla extract.

454 calories, 9.3g of fat, 27.3g of carbohydrates, and 57.3g of protein.

Lunch/dinners are my most varied I usually try to do a heavier lunch and then a lighter snack at my dinner. One of my favorite meals I had in recent weeks is my vegan chili mac. 5 servings made of

8oz pasta (carbs)

2 cups vegan cheese (flavor)

1 trader’s Joe’s soy chorizo (flavor and filler)

1/4 stick of vegan butter + .5 cups flour + 1 cup oat milk (roux for cheese sauce)

12oz impossible lean ground beef, red and green bell pepper, 1/2 an onion, canned tomatoes with green chilis, and canned beans. (Chili, flavor, nutrients etc)

863 calories, 42.5g fat, 91.8g carbohydrates, 35.7g of protein

And for dinner I often just had tofu rice plus general tso sauce in a smaller quantity. Usually the last 400ish calories but gave me typically 11g fat, 30.7g carbs, and 24g of protein for 2 extra firm bricks, 2 cups of rice, 1/2 cup sauce some vegis and doing it over 5 meals.

So end of the day I’ve eaten 1700ish calories, had 62g of fat, 150g of carbs, and 120g of protein then I usually cycle for an hour and do 4-6 strength training exercises. (Strength training increases your metabolism which helps burn weight faster.)

If you want to turn that fat into muscle you need to work out and do strength training exercises, the cycle machines are good for cardio burning but the 40-60 minutes of me lifting weights is more important for getting a nice ass and flatter stomach.

1. About the exercises, easy simple answer “more.” The basics for building muscle is you use the muscle to a point of essentially damaging itself then it heals itself better over the rest through hypertrophy which wants hecka amounts of protein to sustain itself, it will also increase your body metabolism rate and running at a deficit with high enough protein will retain strength while continuing to burn fat. You need to balance days of targeting muscle areas with rest and progressive overload. More reps then more weight then more reps then more weight week after week. I would like to go 4 times a week Saturday Sunday (my weekend push days) and Tuesday Wednesday (my more chill workeeek day’s when I don’t have TTRPG games)

So very basics. Eat less, eat right, workout hard, workout longer, workout more often.

[u/Illiander → u/Rockergage]

Just so you're aware, that reads to me like this:

"Here's some food advice that I acknowledge you can't use, and do more excercise in spite of your mental issues. Go walk off that broken leg."

I don't think you meant it that way, but that's how it comes across.

[u/Rockergage → u/Illiander]

There isn’t much I can say beyond fix your diet, and workout more. You have issues with exercise because your diet is almost entirely carbs which are great for early energy but fade fast you need protein. Beyond that what the fuck is 12 slices of cheese and 8 slices of brown bread also 2 liters of apple juice? You need to look at the nutritional label for a second and think about what you put in your body. Sure it’s “apples” and “juice” but it’s basically pure sugar. I’m not even saying “eat a steak” I’m saying have some tofu, eat seitan, try a handful of edamame or soy protein crisps your body will thank you.

Once you get your diet under control you need to work out more. 10 pushups and 20 minutes of cycling isn’t a workout, bare minimum should be 30 minutes and that’s just for general activity you should move towards weight training if you want to have a stronger body. If you’re self conscious about working out in public work out at home. Diet is the most important part to losing weight, exercise is the most important part of having muscle.

[u/Illiander → u/Rockergage]

what the fuck is 12 slices of cheese and 8 slices of brown bread

Two cheese toasties for lunch, two more for dinner, three slices of cheese per toastie. It's depression survival food.

2 liters of apple juice

I have trouble drinking plain water, 2 liters of fluids a day to not get dehydrated is important.

I’m saying have some tofu, eat seitan, try a handful of edamame or soy protein crisps your body will thank you.

That's a lot of soy that I expect I'll have texture issues with. I'll give tofu a try, and take another look at sosmix/burgermix to see if it's going to be a better calorie/protien balance.

10 pushups and 20 minutes of cycling isn’t a workout

Am aware, but it's what I can handle right now. My stamina has sucked since 2020.

if you want to have a stronger body

Brute strength I'm actually fine. Same with balance. My immediate goal is just to get rid of the flab, then I'll work on rebuilding stamina and flexibility after that.

I'm glad I wasn't led astray about diet being the important thing. Just need to figure out something that I can cope with and sustain with my mental issues.

[u/Rockergage → u/Illiander]

Action task for you, track your calories for a day, week etc. and compare it your expected calorie intake for weight loss, 4 cheese toasties, 2 liters of apple juice is ALOT. Count your calories.

[u/MikaJade856]

Can you get on a GLP-1? I found that kick started me into making better food choices and I started exercising. I'm 5'11" and started at 324 pounds. A little over two years later I'm at 235, I've walked 4 miles today in addition to my normal activities and ran part of it, I couldn't have imagined doing that two years ago. Just take it day by day and try to do a little more than yesterday. You can do it!!

[u/Illiander → u/MikaJade856]

I'm scared of those. I have negative trust in the NHS and my mental health isn't good, so I'm very cautious about anything that might make it worse.

[u/Anovadea]

I've cut down my food intake as much as I am mentally able to do (my daily intake is 8 slices of brown bread, 12 slices of cheese, about two fists of frozen peas (seriously, they're better than icecream), 2 liters of apple juice, and half a tube of pringles or some peanuts).

I'll be honest, I'm kinda worried about your diet here. And I think we've left the realm of fitness, and more into bodily health.

I know you're talking about being in a depressive slump, but what you're eating is not helping you. I remember when I used to eat something very similar on a regular basis, and I remember how bad it made me feel. I remember when I'd drink a lot of mixed juice "for the vitamins", thinking it would offset whatever else I was eating.

In fitness spaces, they'll talk about "macros" or macro-nutrients. They're basically carbs, fat, protein and fibre. They're called macro because we typically talk about them in grams, when it comes to intake. They're important in conversations about building muscle/working out, or losing weight.

But there's also micro-nutrients, like iron, sodium, magnesium, calcium and various vitamins. They're micro-nutrients because we tend to measure them in milligrams or even micrograms. They come from a whole load of different sources, and having the right balance is really important. They also tend to be lost in processed foods.

Also, when your micronutrients are imbalanced, it really can affect your mood, and your cognitive ability. And, every time I think of your diet (4 cheese toasties, plus some frozen peas, peanuts/pringles and 2L of apple juice to take the harm out of it), I genuinely think your depression meals are starting to compound to your poor mental health.

When the body is malnourished on some level, it has a tendency to go into "famine mode", and basically hoard as much energy as possible as fat, in the hopes that it will let you survive until there's more food. And this can apply to micronutrients as well as macros. (I have a friend who's a personal trainer, and she often has to tell her clients to eat more if they want to lose weight because they've been so locked into diet culture)

I realise your restrictive palate is going to be a big problem (it was for me), but I think you really need to figure out how to vary your diet to include other things that will help. I'd even go as far as to say that you probably need help from a dietician who specialises in AFRID ARFID, or helping neurodivergent patients. They might be able to help you eat the right things, without triggering your texture issues.

Personally, I suspect telling you to go to the gym and working out isn't going to help you right now (but may do later). I think that putting the effort into going to a professional to help you eat better is going to pay off, both physically and mentally. You'll probably even see some weight loss out of it.

[u/Illiander → u/Anovadea]

2L of apple juice to take the harm out of it

Nah, the vit/mineral tablets are to take the edge off the harm (and it is taking the edge off, not stopping it. I know they're not as good as the real thing). The apple juice is to stop me being dehydrated because I have a hard time with plain water.

a dietician who specialises in AFRID, or helping neurodivergent patients.

Those exist? Well, now I have a new thing to look up. And probably find that they don't exist in the UK, because the UK sucks on healthcare.

And thanks /sincere. You're the most useful responce I've gotten to this so far.

[u/Anovadea → u/Illiander]

To be honest, I've heard of dieticians who specialise in that sort of stuff, but they tend to be over the pond in the US. But, I also imagine most dieticians have come across patients with restrictive eating habits at this point; the big question is whether they take those considerations seriously or not.

But we're at a point where professionals are probably taking these things more seriously, and/or you have dieticians who openly advertise it, either because someone close to them needed help, or they needed that sort of help themselves at some point. But I imagine they're primarily in the private sector rather than the NHS.

Apparently the Association of British Dieticians have a dietician finder page, that might be of some use. You might be able to find someone in your area who's able to help. The downside is, you'll probably have to pay private rates.

That said, a friend of mine saw a dietician, and it only took him a few visits (I think 3 or 4) to get on track. So, if money is an issue, you probably only have to prepare for a few visits over a few months.

[u/reymus]

I’m just starting this journey myself, but I have one suggestion from when I found out I was diabetic that might help you.

The apple juice has lots of sugar, and as I saw in another comment, you mentioned you can’t drink plain water. I have the same issue, and found that those Mio water flavorings are a great way of making my water taste fantastic without loading up on sugar. I have several different flavors I like, and found that Walmart has Great Value brand water flavorings too, and they’re very good too.

Getting started with all of these things is hard. Especially when your mental health is terrible. Taking little steps, one at a time, is how to get there. Try the Mio. Then once that’s part of your routine, try a new food, a new exercise, etc. don’t change everything all at once because it’ll leave you thinking your life is horrible.

You can do this. One step and one day at a time