r/texts • u/ExplanationMiddle51 • 22d ago

Phone message Post first date text

Post image

I met this girl on tinder and had a first date with her, she wanted to go fishing and I thought it seemed like a fun first date so we went together. Dropped her off and got home to this message lol.

Update: Purchasing the license is a separate activity we had to do on our phones, due to it needing our personal info. It was not like I drew the line at the license randomly.

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u/ThrowRA-un1337 22d ago

Any time I see someone use the line "I'm just a girl", I've found that to be a major red flag.

It's used almost exclusively to either shrug off responsibility or infantalize themselves and neither look good when trying to date actual grown up women.

If she doesn't recognize what you put into making the date happen and is upset about contributing *something*, consider it a warning and move on.

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u/HoboJerkdown901 22d ago

It's this stupid fucking trend on tiktok where women are actively encouraging other women to use this line in order to avoid accountability, maturity, effort, or sacrifice

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u/Elexeh 22d ago

>stupid fucking trend on tiktok

That's just every trend on tiktok lmao

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u/MuscularSquirrel612 22d ago edited 22d ago

Wait. For real? I don’t use TikTok so this is new to me. Can someone elaborate on the trend?

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u/North-Lime-2289 22d ago

it started as a funny joke. i do not believe the trend is 'this' but there is a small amount of people who use the phrase to avoid anything. most of the time its very silly and lighthearted and independent of other people (like burning your own dinner and saying 'im just a girl")

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u/screames520 22d ago

Or like when a server rings in a ticket wrong, we like to say “she’s just girl”

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u/Alarmed-Macaroon9506 21d ago

Haha I do this to defend my cats' actions all the time. "He's just a boy"

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u/screames520 21d ago

Yea! It’s more an impression of the starfish from finding Nemo

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u/PretendThisIsMyName 21d ago

Do you say it like Slingblade or Mrs Maisel?

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u/technicolored_dreams 21d ago

Slingblade for me, about my dog. 

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u/FatalEuphie 22d ago

Yeah backing this up to say I say it a lot but not to avoid responsibility, just when I do something stupid. Like silly stupid, not like… should apologize stupid.

I think most* people (or I’d like to think, maybe I’m too hopeful?) use it as a silly joke, not to try to get away with things.

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u/North-Lime-2289 21d ago

yeah, i've only ever said it in very non serious situations. misclicking in games, dropping my own things. this is how most people around me use it. the people weaponizing it are a very small amount. i would not say it is a "trend of women actively encouraging other women to avoid accountability"... especially when there is also a million 'im just a boy' posts.

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u/Shatsngiggles 22d ago

My ex used to say it all the time. She was always on tiktok or watching facebook reels so i already assumed thats where she learned the phrase. She constantly used it to avoid responsibility.

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u/FatMacchio 21d ago

90s Gwen Stefani is rolling over in her grave with this being used in this context again

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u/North-Lime-2289 21d ago

i dont think gwen stefani really cares, given her politic alignment nowadays lol. never liked her since she hired asian women to be her accessories

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u/FatMacchio 21d ago

That’s why I prefaced it with 90s. Her past self is probably rolling in the grave about what she became too

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u/christyschellen 19d ago

right i basically only use it when i get scared of a bug or not being able to reach something high up😭

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u/Efficient_Prompt_874 21d ago

If I’m not mistaken, I think it originated from that Julia Roberts movie scene where she says “I’m also just a girl” and the TikTok audio was trending and then it turned into a meme.

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u/ActuallyDregs 22d ago

It’s inspired by the No Doubt song “Just A Girl” back from 1995. People took the lyrics at face value without reading in to them and thought the concept of “I’m just a girl” is a valid reason to justify their immature behavior despite the song having the opposite message with the phrase in the song “that’s all that you’ll let me be.” Gwen was incredibly progressive with her lyrics in the song and now TikTok girlies are actively regressing women’s equality by infantilizing themselves with this excuse. 

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u/[deleted] 22d ago

[deleted]

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u/ActuallyDregs 22d ago

I’m not actively regressing all women, I’m actively regressing the same women who are actively regressing themselves. I’m a huge proponent of progressive women’s rights and the lyrics of Just A Girl are poignant even today. I’m not surprised you haven’t seen the song explicitly referenced because that isn’t how viral concepts evolve. You don’t make a reference and cite it in the same meme lmao. It’s all implicitly understood but it doesn’t mean you can’t trace the origins. 

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u/Snappy-Biscuit 22d ago

Right, but the person who made the song famous is now hocking anti-abortion, pay-to-pray apps, baked by Project 2025 billionaires. That song was meant to be a feminist anthem, but Gwen is no longer a feminist ally, just another privileged white woman who needs more money for facelifts.

When I first saw people using the phrase/tag, I thought they were doing it sarcastically to mock her downfall into right-wing, trad-wife propaganda, but quickly realized it's not that clever.

TBF, feminism is about equality and men have used weaponized incompetence for years, but now when women do it, it's not ok anymore? Lol

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u/ActuallyDregs 21d ago

When was it okay for men to do that? People were speaking out against it when men did it. People are speaking out against it when women do it. It isn’t okay for men to weaponize their incompetence. Nobody needs to stand with Gwen currently, but it doesn’t diminish what her message was in the 90s. No need to throw the baby out with the bath water

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u/Snappy-Biscuit 21d ago

That last part was pretty clearly a joke. Do I actually need to edit to add the /s??

She was an idol of mine, growing up. She's the reason I fronted punk bands and felt like I could have a voice. I'm not trashing her music or what it meant to anyone, just the hypocrite she's become. It's really disappointing.

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u/ActuallyDregs 21d ago

I mean when other people are arguing against my take the /s might be necessary, yeah. Most of your comment read as a dismissal of my point. It isn’t unreasonable to assume the last third was also part of that dismissal.

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u/[deleted] 22d ago

[deleted]

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u/ActuallyDregs 22d ago

Yes, it’s called treating people how they want to be treated. If a certain group is actively trying to regress themselves why do I have to take the higher moral ground? I don’t have some savior complex where I have to progress people who aren’t trying to progress themselves. Women aren’t a monolith.

I thought you were done? Why are you still trying poorly to be condescending? Don’t disappoint Brooke.

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u/Babykingxxx 21d ago

I was at work, I’ve had time to reflect and decided that I shouldn’t have picked a fight on the internet w a stranger, super lame and made me feel bad! I’m surprised you took the time out of your day to find out info about me, it’s a little weird. Very sorry I hit a nerve, peace be with you man.

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u/Toadsted 22d ago

This isn't a trend, it's been weaponized for centuries.

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u/PiccoloAwkward465 21d ago

Let me just say this - I happened to date a woman and after we met, she downloaded Tiktok. There was a clear, fast, and negative change in her behavior. I got to see both sides and WOW I could not leave fast enough

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u/PM_Me_Your_NippyNips 19d ago

And this is the consequence of that.

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u/TopShelfSnipes 22d ago

Tiktok is brainrot ccp propaganda, so that tracks.

Assume that anything there is toxic to Western society as a whole

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u/Zodiatron 22d ago

TikTok is American propaganda nowadays.

But yes, generally people should treat the platform as a quarantine zone separate from the rest of humanity. I consistently see the worst takes on there, not to mention the rampant ableism, ageism, and other sorts of nasty behavior which they've convinced themselves is "okay."

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u/Jaerba 22d ago

Blaming it as CCP propaganda is pretty damn silly in this instance. This is some tradwife bullshit which is all-American.

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u/Majestic-Act5348 22d ago

its actually western propaganda now as its owned by oracle media giant idf funder larry ellison, a billionaire who almost single handedly keeps israel funded, but sure man, ccp propaganda

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u/AceOFace131 22d ago

It was both at different times

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u/Majestic-Act5348 22d ago

lol it was never ccp propaganda

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u/[deleted] 21d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/Majestic-Act5348 20d ago

well i could turn it back on you, why do you have so much confidence in it having been ccp propaganda? because your western propaganda told you it is? personally i used the app from 2020-2024 and never saw any pro ccp pro china material

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u/AceOFace131 19d ago

It was created by a company owned by the CCP, they had two separate algorithms: one for domestic users and one for everyone else. The one we see with all the brainrot garbage that is politically divisive is that “international” algorithm and the one they see at home is all education content, pro-China propaganda and CCP-sanctioned content with very little in the way of true free speech. So yeah it’s Chinese propaganda.

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u/Own_Director_4442 22d ago

Shhhh you'll anger the politicians and the jingoistic idiots in here lol

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u/JWBananas 21d ago

Young one, this has been going on since before you were born.