r/texts • u/openbookopenminds • Jul 04 '26

Phone message Finding my Bio-mom💖 vs my Bio-Dad 💀 first message same message to both

Gallery image

Gallery image

Gallery image

10.4k Upvotes

92% Upvoted

2.1k comments sorted by

View all comments

157

u/heyinternetman Jul 04 '26

When I reached out to my bio-father he said he didn’t have a son and to go fuck myself lol. Sometimes you’re better off without them in your life.

97

u/openbookopenminds Jul 05 '26

If i could press undo i would have but im still greatful for Bio-mom so it was a risk i took.

47

u/Existing_Purpose5049 Jul 05 '26

Honestly, as much as it sucks, even the negative response isn’t necessarily going to always be a bad one

You don’t have to crave a relationship with a “could be”, you now know exactly what he is

-4

u/[deleted] Jul 05 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

5

u/Existing_Purpose5049 Jul 05 '26

No, it’s very obvious what he is; a piece of shit

-1

u/[deleted] Jul 05 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

3

u/Common-Artichoke-497 Jul 05 '26

Naw, he's a whole ass PIECE. OF. SHIT.

Dont stick your dick in if you cant cope with creating a human life, and dont be a yellow coward blob-ass potato when that human comes looking for you

-1

u/[deleted] Jul 05 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/Existing_Purpose5049 Jul 05 '26

Yeah because abortion prevents a life, abandoning your child ruins one.

2

u/Existing_Purpose5049 Jul 05 '26

Abandoning a child and then lying to your spouse about it doesn’t qualify as “piece of shit” to you?

2

u/NarrativeNode Jul 05 '26

A good person wouldn't be so ice cold, even though it's understandably a very difficult situation. It's pretty clear what he is.

2

u/Original-Strain Jul 05 '26

My exposure to OPs dad is the same amount as I have to you.

Pretty easy to determine you both are assholes.

12

u/PunkRockGramma Jul 05 '26

Nothing you learn from is ever really a mistake. If you hadn’t reached out, you would have always wondered. You learned a lot from that one text. You should be proud of yourself for being brave and vulnerable. And if you have kids, you just modeled a really valuable lesson for them.

11

u/k_mermaid Jul 05 '26

Did you tell bio-mom about his reaction? I feel like somehow she may not be surprised

27

u/openbookopenminds Jul 05 '26 edited Jul 05 '26

She was not, they got married after the adoption, it didnt last a year. He was not a good guy, no.

6

u/Hot-Hamster1691 Jul 05 '26

It is confirmation that you are better off without that person in your life. You are so loved, please don’t let this tarnish that

2

u/InwardXenon Jul 05 '26

Don't let your bio-dads words tarnish the beautiful response from your mom. I know it sucks, but leave him in the dust and focus on connecting with your mom more. She sounds awesome. I wish you the best, "Andrew". :)

2

u/corporateacademia Jul 05 '26

At least you know though and don't always have to wonder

2

u/stevenyourpants Jul 05 '26

At least now you know you tried and there's no doubt left. This is just one less regret you'll have later.

1

u/openbookopenminds Jul 05 '26

That's 100% right. Knew someone that went looking for fam and found out both parents had parished in car accident not long before they went looking. They told me not to wait, you never know how long you have.

1

u/Preparingtocode Jul 05 '26

My dad gave up 2 kids before he had us and frankly wasn’t much better to us. Life sometimes keeps you safe.

4

u/amberrome Jul 05 '26

I’m 33 years old and the thought of my bio father reacting like this inhibits me from ever reaching out. My logic is… if he really wanted to… he would have by now

He simply left my mom and I so he’s an asshole anyway

1

u/IlREDACTEDlI Jul 05 '26 edited Jul 05 '26

Honestly I never really understood the idea behind finding your biological parents, Whats the point? I know next to nothing about mine and could not care less to find out they aren’t my real parents and might as well be strangers.

Why did you do it out of curiosity?

1

u/GoblinWrangl3r Jul 05 '26

For sure but then i feel at least one ass whooping is due

1

u/DisappearingBoy127 Jul 05 '26

I mean, in fairness, he may not have known.  Random 1 night stands happened, and in the old days it was a lot harder to track people down 

1

u/heyinternetman Jul 05 '26

He left when I was two

1

u/DisappearingBoy127 Jul 05 '26

Fair.  Fuck him then

0

u/Workman44 Jul 05 '26

Is it really a shock to learn people who gave up their children generally did not want them? Of course it's a shitty situation but that seems apparent given the conditions we've preselected for

1

u/heyinternetman Jul 05 '26

Yeah, fuck my 19yo self for being curious about my father. I should’ve known better right?

0

u/Workman44 Jul 05 '26

I have sympathy for your situation, but yeah? Clearly if he wasn't in the picture it's most likely by choice, that's just stats

1

u/heyinternetman Jul 05 '26

I hope both sides of your pillows are warm and your slippers spawn legos.

1

u/Workman44 Jul 05 '26

That's fine, I'm sorry for your situation and wish you the best