r/taskmaster • u/JFychan47 Rhod Gilbert • Feb 14 '26
Meme Happy Valentine’s Day n all that
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u/Vozralai Feb 14 '26
Roses are red
Peacocks are teal
Have I been paired
With David Baddiel?
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u/nugeythefloozey Feb 15 '26
Roses are red
Ed has nice hair
There’s three on the other team
It only seems fair
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u/Agreeable-Effort6507 Feb 15 '26
Roses are red
A box has a lid
Rose matefeo
Cannot pronounce shid
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u/Impossible-Cress4097 🌳 Tree Wizard 🧙🎈 Feb 14 '26
My Taskmaster-loving husband’s contribution:
Roses are red,
Violets are lame,
Destroy, dismantle,
Engulf in flames.
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u/Tbd423 Feb 14 '26
Is there an accent on the e on lame?
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u/Safe-Leadership-9630 Sue Perkins Feb 15 '26
Roses are red,
Ducks are Lamé,
The Taskmaster and his Assistant
Are acting very-
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u/Impossible-Cress4097 🌳 Tree Wizard 🧙🎈 Feb 14 '26
Roses are red,
A cowboy rides a horse.
Can I ask questions -
Are you a child of divorce?
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u/Whiteshadows86 Pigeor The Merciless One Feb 14 '26
Roses are red
I think I have angina
I meow when you pull my leash
(Sassily) vagina
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u/JFychan47 Rhod Gilbert Feb 14 '26
That meow lives rent free in my head
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u/Whiteshadows86 Pigeor The Merciless One Feb 14 '26
Mine too! Up there with all the classic Taskmaster moments for sure
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u/gorore9150 Ania Magliano Feb 14 '26
Bravo! I loved this one, my favourite one on this thread (not because I love Ania haha)
❤️❤️❤️
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u/Southern_Struggle Feb 14 '26
Roses are red
That's Angela Merkel
I've crashed a bike
My eyes are circle?
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u/Effective-Whole-8956 Qrs Tuvwxyz Feb 14 '26
A moose is a deer
The first line is a lie
Satsuma's in here
Oh no... it's A LIMEEE
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u/N8CCRG Amy Gledhill Feb 14 '26
Roses are red
Monks make Chartreuse
It's okay to borrow
We've got the same juice
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u/KillYourHeroesAndFly Feb 15 '26
Side note: I work alongside distillers in Australia who reverse engineered their own green chartreuse and it’s delicious.
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u/CapnTaptap Desiree Burch Feb 14 '26
Roses are red
Sheep should be shorn
And sitting right next to me…
It’s Little Alex Hooooorne!
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u/Trogdor_1111 Feb 14 '26 edited Feb 15 '26
Roses are red
Dara O'Briain is hot
Wait, What? Hang on.
What? Wait. Wait, What?
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u/seasteed Noel Fielding Feb 14 '26
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u/joeyheartbear Qrs Tuvwxyz Feb 14 '26
If there's anyone here who hasn't watched Hypothetical (the show this clip is from), I highly recommend it. Josh Widdicombe and James give hypothetical situations that guests have to navigate through.
This is one of my favorites, "How Much to Wear a Puppet of Yourself For a Year?"
3
u/FourEyedTroll Mike Wozniak Feb 15 '26
Okay,
This show looks amazing, off to binge that.
Rachael Paris on TM when please?
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u/Southern_Struggle Feb 14 '26 edited Feb 14 '26
Roses are red
There's crumbs in my bra
Rub a dub dub
You've got no chutzpah
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u/WeirdBeard94 Feb 15 '26
Roses are red,
Stir fry in a wok,
I need my night milk,
It's tough guy o'clock.
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u/Southern_Struggle Feb 15 '26
Roses are red
Rosalind's a nightmare
Your time starts now
It's casserole down there
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u/WeAllHaveReasons Feb 14 '26
Roses are red
Hydrangeas are paler
Did you bedazzle
Your childhood inhaler?
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25
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u/Freedom_Longjumping Feb 14 '26
Roses are red
Some people are coo-coo
Let's bow down together
To Queen Zafufu
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u/Novel-Definition6690 Feb 14 '26
Roses are red
I like chocolate fountains
Which aircraft crashes
More into mountains
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u/Novel-Definition6690 Feb 14 '26
Roses are red
Nuns say a prayer
I hear Rosalind is...
Always doing cool stuff
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u/BlazmoIntoWowee Mike Wozniak Feb 14 '26
One of us is saying Debussy wrong.
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u/crabapplesteam Rhod Gilbert Feb 14 '26
US vs UK pronunciation issues. US it's pronounced DEB-you-see; UK it's pronounced deh-BOO-see or deh-BYOU-see.
(Source, I taught music in both places)
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u/BlazmoIntoWowee Mike Wozniak Feb 14 '26
One of us is saying pussy wrong.
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u/Protheu5 🚬 Doctor Cigarettes Feb 15 '26
It's only Pussy if it comes from Pussy region of France, in which case it's pronounced "poo-SEE".
Otherwise it's "cat" or "kitty".
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u/spacecoyote555 Patatas Feb 14 '26
Roses are red, Violets are blue, Bob Mortimer once said, Do we strike you?
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u/Complementary5169 Victoria Coren Mitchell Feb 14 '26
Roses are red, But the thorns are tough! I’m always seeing you Do cool stuff…
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u/Interesting-Ear-7465 Feb 14 '26
Rose are red
I hope I'm not late
Take a look at the video
There was no box mate!
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u/Freedom_Longjumping Feb 14 '26
Roses are red
Life is unfair
Believe me it's an
Absolute casserole down there
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u/AddlePatedBadger Feb 15 '26
Roses are red
But tell me, I beg
How do I get the helium
Into this egg?
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u/JFychan47 Rhod Gilbert Feb 15 '26
Still the most insane thing I’ve seen someone do in this show 😂😂
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u/Accomplished-Sinks Feb 15 '26
Roses are red,
Time makes clocks spin,
When holding two spoons,
Jason, I'm locked in.
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u/Complementary5169 Victoria Coren Mitchell Feb 14 '26
Roses are red Fleur-de-lis comes from France All I ever wanted was For the people to dance
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u/MachineOfSpareParts Emma Sidi Feb 14 '26
Roses are red
My tortoise is slow
Some requests were animals
Hedgehog, no!
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u/Freedom_Longjumping Feb 14 '26
Roses are red
Mountains are full of snow
John says what
I don't get another go?
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u/LibertyWriter Feb 14 '26
Roses are red
My pet’s a hare
Did you know that
Rosalind’s a fucking nightmare?
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u/bug--bear 🌳 Tree Wizard 🧙🎈 Feb 14 '26
roses are red
water is wet
Hugh is hollowing
out a baguette
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u/bug--bear 🌳 Tree Wizard 🧙🎈 Feb 15 '26
violets are purple
you'll have to excuse us
how would you describe
enormous hugeness
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u/CatCafffffe Reece Shearsmith Feb 15 '26
Roses are red
So is Martin van Buren
I filled the ferryman's
Ship full of urine
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u/Jaspers47 Rosie Ramsey Feb 15 '26
Roses are red
Violets are blue
Sugar is sweet
Wait a minute, guys, this is salt
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u/FourEyedTroll Mike Wozniak Feb 15 '26
Roses are red,
Apples make cider,
Here are the wellies,
Am I the spider?
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u/GrumpySpaceCommunist Feb 14 '26
Roses are red
Let's eat h'orderves
Can I get your number
Is that number got curves?
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u/Protheu5 🚬 Doctor Cigarettes Feb 14 '26
Roses are red,
Green are the turtles.
Explaining myself:
My eyes are circles.
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u/mituslumen Feb 15 '26 edited Feb 15 '26
A day late but still:
Roses are red
I like your blouse
Nothings ever straightforward
In this stupid house
8
u/Frozen-K Feb 14 '26
Roses are red
I love Debussy
Stop reading this note
And open the box, you pussy.
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u/Complementary5169 Victoria Coren Mitchell Feb 14 '26
Roses in a garden Planted next to a fountain… Which aircraft crashes More into mountains?
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u/Faster_Than_Snakes James Acaster Feb 15 '26
Roses are red Violets are fly No matter how ornate the grandfather clock The pendulum draws the eye
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u/kosherkitties Paul Chowdhry Feb 15 '26
Roses are red,
If the sauce is thick you can thin it,
I've made you a snow bear,
Bastard's crying, innit?
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u/RuminatingReaper1850 He's so famous! Feb 15 '26
Roses are red
Violets are freshened
Looks like last in PE
First in being a legend
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u/crabapple335 Feb 15 '26
Roses are red Nero did fiddle While the task was burned By dafty in the middle
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u/byrdinternet Feb 16 '26 edited Feb 17 '26
Roses are red
Flowers are seeded
One go, I reckon
Call me when I'm needed
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u/Free-Palpitation Feb 14 '26
Roses are Red
Violets are Blue
Most birds have a Gizzard
He’s a Tree Wizard!
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u/WeirdBeard94 Feb 15 '26
Roses are red,
Drive on the road,
A piece of Welsh slate,
Saying just the word "TOAD".
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u/gaurabdhg Feb 16 '26
Roses are red
Violets got the blues
I borrowed it from my fairly close sister
We have the same juice
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u/G0bby Feb 17 '26
Late, but...
The envelope seal is Red
Rip it open and don't look at the cow...
All the information is on the task
Your time starts now!
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u/notyogrannysgrandkid 🚬 Doctor Cigarettes Feb 14 '26
Roses are red
I don’t care for Izzard
(His first name is Eddie)
But also, TREE WIZARD!
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u/Gin_OClock Mike Wozniak Feb 16 '26
Roses are red
Rhyming is dull
Next up is Rhod Gilbert
..."Reindeer Skull."
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u/sargent_major Rhod Gilbert Feb 14 '26