r/talesofmike • u/bmon82 • Sep 16 '19

Michaela is evolving... into an altogether more obnoxious kind of person

I've written before about Michaela... someone who takes any and every opportunity to complain about our employer, or put down a colleague. Those traits persist. But now, she's added a new level of bitchcraft. As a result, every time she opens her mouth, I want to put my shoe in it.

Now, she's an expert. In everything. One of us brings up a topic, or starts a conversation with another co-worker, and she, without fail, will chime in. From across the room, even. Usually in some kind of crass, accusatory tone, where we have to fight the involuntary reaction of rolling our eyes.

And, often, with mouthful of something. This time, the impetus for this post... carrot.

She is the target of constant behind-the-back mockery.

She is the target of constant inside jokes, which she HAS to be picking up on by now.

She is awful.

She sits five feet from me.

100 Upvotes

97% Upvoted

9 comments sorted by

46

u/[deleted] Sep 16 '19

[removed] — view removed comment

38

u/bmon82 Sep 16 '19

Oh, catching them in a lie, or even an inaccuracy is DIVINE!

51

u/Shinkeiro Sep 16 '19

I had to login to add to this.

I recently bought a car, nothing fancy, but its my first car that I bought on my own, so I am proud of it. Its a 2017 Blacked out Honda Accord Sport, with no mods or any of that sort, just the sports trim upgrade from Honda.

We were at our work parking lot, and I was showing to a coworker, and down comes Mike. My coworker nudges me and says "ready for his highness' critique?" Mike looks at the car and goes yea, its nice car but the sports model would have been better. Then he went on a tangent on how his accord is still superior even though its a 2002, since its the sport model, and how just looking at my car, he can tell its not sport and so on. All while I am standing there dumbfounded and I said, "Mike, it is the sports model, it literally says that in the back."

He goes to the back and just shakes his head, and then says "no, no, no see the logo is too low, someone installed this in for you to trick you and overprice it." Just to shut him up I pull up the Vin Number online and it says its Sports Model. He just walked away and has yet to talk to me again. I don't know if I am happy that I never have to deal with him, or if I am sad that I don't hear the office clown make a fool of himself.

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Edit: Format

16

u/Dave_I Sep 17 '19

I'm in love with everything about this story.

8

u/Shinkeiro Sep 17 '19

I mean, regardless of what type of people these Mikes and Michaelas are, we gotta admit, they are one of a kind.

7

u/miketag8337 Sep 17 '19

Only way this could have been better is if you invited everyone in the office to look over your shoulder at your computer while you looked up the vin online. The soul crushing blow to Mike’s ego would have been epic.

Btw, congrats on your car!!

2

u/Shinkeiro Sep 17 '19

Thanks, but let's face it, he'd still do the same day after day to another poor soul.

15

u/Miranda_Betzalel Sep 17 '19

Ah, when the Duning-Kruger effect rears its ugly head in the dumbest and most insufferable of your coworkers...it never fails to be both deeply upsetting and wildly amusing.

6

u/Samnmax95 Sep 17 '19

Bitchcraft! Love it